by Emily Brontë
CHAPTER XIV
As soon as I had perused this epistle I went to the master, and informedhim that his sister had arrived at the Heights, and sent me a letterexpressing her sorrow for Mrs. Linton's situation, and her ardent desireto see him; with a wish that he would transmit to her, as early aspossible, some token of forgiveness by me.
'Forgiveness!' said Linton. 'I have nothing to forgive her, Ellen. Youmay call at Wuthering Heights this afternoon, if you like, and say that Iam not angry, but I'm sorry to have lost her; especially as I can neverthink she'll be happy. It is out of the question my going to see her,however: we are eternally divided; and should she really wish to obligeme, let her persuade the villain she has married to leave the country.'
'And you won't write her a little note, sir?' I asked, imploringly.
'No,' he answered. 'It is needless. My communication with Heathcliff'sfamily shall be as sparing as his with mine. It shall not exist!'
Mr. Edgar's coldness depressed me exceedingly; and all the way from theGrange I puzzled my brains how to put more heart into what he said, whenI repeated it; and how to soften his refusal of even a few lines toconsole Isabella. I daresay she had been on the watch for me sincemorning: I saw her looking through the lattice as I came up the gardencauseway, and I nodded to her; but she drew back, as if afraid of beingobserved. I entered without knocking. There never was such a dreary,dismal scene as the formerly cheerful house presented! I must confess,that if I had been in the young lady's place, I would, at least, haveswept the hearth, and wiped the tables with a duster. But she alreadypartook of the pervading spirit of neglect which encompassed her. Herpretty face was wan and listless; her hair uncurled: some locks hanginglankly down, and some carelessly twisted round her head. Probably shehad not touched her dress since yester evening. Hindley was not there.Mr. Heathcliff sat at a table, turning over some papers in hispocket-book; but he rose when I appeared, asked me how I did, quitefriendly, and offered me a chair. He was the only thing there thatseemed decent; and I thought he never looked better. So much hadcircumstances altered their positions, that he would certainly havestruck a stranger as a born and bred gentleman; and his wife as athorough little slattern! She came forward eagerly to greet me, and heldout one hand to take the expected letter. I shook my head. She wouldn'tunderstand the hint, but followed me to a sideboard, where I went to laymy bonnet, and importuned me in a whisper to give her directly what Ihad brought. Heathcliff guessed the meaning of her manoeuvres, andsaid--'If you have got anything for Isabella (as no doubt you have,Nelly), give it to her. You needn't make a secret of it: we have nosecrets between us.'
'Oh, I have nothing,' I replied, thinking it best to speak the truth atonce. 'My master bid me tell his sister that she must not expect eithera letter or a visit from him at present. He sends his love, ma'am, andhis wishes for your happiness, and his pardon for the grief you haveoccasioned; but he thinks that after this time his household and thehousehold here should drop intercommunication, as nothing could come ofkeeping it up.'
Mrs. Heathcliff's lip quivered slightly, and she returned to her seat inthe window. Her husband took his stand on the hearthstone, near me, andbegan to put questions concerning Catherine. I told him as much as Ithought proper of her illness, and he extorted from me, bycross-examination, most of the facts connected with its origin. I blamedher, as she deserved, for bringing it all on herself; and ended by hopingthat he would follow Mr. Linton's example and avoid future interferencewith his family, for good or evil.
'Mrs. Linton is now just recovering,' I said; 'she'll never be like shewas, but her life is spared; and if you really have a regard for her,you'll shun crossing her way again: nay, you'll move out of this countryentirely; and that you may not regret it, I'll inform you CatherineLinton is as different now from your old friend Catherine Earnshaw, asthat young lady is different from me. Her appearance is changed greatly,her character much more so; and the person who is compelled, ofnecessity, to be her companion, will only sustain his affection hereafterby the remembrance of what she once was, by common humanity, and a senseof duty!'
'That is quite possible,' remarked Heathcliff, forcing himself to seemcalm: 'quite possible that your master should have nothing but commonhumanity and a sense of duty to fall back upon. But do you imagine thatI shall leave Catherine to his _duty_ and _humanity_? and can you comparemy feelings respecting Catherine to his? Before you leave this house, Imust exact a promise from you that you'll get me an interview with her:consent, or refuse, I _will_ see her! What do you say?'
'I say, Mr. Heathcliff,' I replied, 'you must not: you never shall,through my means. Another encounter between you and the master wouldkill her altogether.'
'With your aid that may be avoided,' he continued; 'and should there bedanger of such an event--should he be the cause of adding a singletrouble more to her existence--why, I think I shall be justified in goingto extremes! I wish you had sincerity enough to tell me whetherCatherine would suffer greatly from his loss: the fear that she wouldrestrains me. And there you see the distinction between our feelings:had he been in my place, and I in his, though I hated him with a hatredthat turned my life to gall, I never would have raised a hand againsthim. You may look incredulous, if you please! I never would havebanished him from her society as long as she desired his. The moment herregard ceased, I would have torn his heart out, and drunk his blood! But,till then--if you don't believe me, you don't know me--till then, I wouldhave died by inches before I touched a single hair of his head!'
'And yet,' I interrupted, 'you have no scruples in completely ruining allhopes of her perfect restoration, by thrusting yourself into herremembrance now, when she has nearly forgotten you, and involving her ina new tumult of discord and distress.'
'You suppose she has nearly forgotten me?' he said. 'Oh, Nelly! you knowshe has not! You know as well as I do, that for every thought she spendson Linton she spends a thousand on me! At a most miserable period of mylife, I had a notion of the kind: it haunted me on my return to theneighbourhood last summer; but only her own assurance could make me admitthe horrible idea again. And then, Linton would be nothing, nor Hindley,nor all the dreams that ever I dreamt. Two words would comprehend myfuture--_death_ and _hell_: existence, after losing her, would be hell.Yet I was a fool to fancy for a moment that she valued Edgar Linton'sattachment more than mine. If he loved with all the powers of his punybeing, he couldn't love as much in eighty years as I could in a day. AndCatherine has a heart as deep as I have: the sea could be as readilycontained in that horse-trough as her whole affection be monopolised byhim. Tush! He is scarcely a degree dearer to her than her dog, or herhorse. It is not in him to be loved like me: how can she love in himwhat he has not?'
'Catherine and Edgar are as fond of each other as any two people can be,'cried Isabella, with sudden vivacity. 'No one has a right to talk inthat manner, and I won't hear my brother depreciated in silence!'
'Your brother is wondrous fond of you too, isn't he?' observedHeathcliff, scornfully. 'He turns you adrift on the world withsurprising alacrity.'
'He is not aware of what I suffer,' she replied. 'I didn't tell himthat.'
'You have been telling him something, then: you have written, have you?'
'To say that I was married, I did write--you saw the note.'
'And nothing since?'
'No.'
'My young lady is looking sadly the worse for her change of condition,' Iremarked. 'Somebody's love comes short in her case, obviously; whose, Imay guess; but, perhaps, I shouldn't say.'
'I should guess it was her own,' said Heathcliff. 'She degenerates intoa mere slut! She is tired of trying to please me uncommonly early. You'dhardly credit it, but the very morrow of our wedding she was weeping togo home. However, she'll suit this house so much the better for notbeing over nice, and I'll take care she does not disgrace me by ramblingabroad.'
'Well, sir,' returned I, 'I hope you'll consider that Mrs. Heathcliff isaccustomed to b
e looked after and waited on; and that she has beenbrought up like an only daughter, whom every one was ready to serve. Youmust let her have a maid to keep things tidy about her, and you musttreat her kindly. Whatever be your notion of Mr. Edgar, you cannot doubtthat she has a capacity for strong attachments, or she wouldn't haveabandoned the elegancies, and comforts, and friends of her former home,to fix contentedly, in such a wilderness as this, with you.'
'She abandoned them under a delusion,' he answered; 'picturing in me ahero of romance, and expecting unlimited indulgences from my chivalrousdevotion. I can hardly regard her in the light of a rational creature,so obstinately has she persisted in forming a fabulous notion of mycharacter and acting on the false impressions she cherished. But, atlast, I think she begins to know me: I don't perceive the silly smilesand grimaces that provoked me at first; and the senseless incapability ofdiscerning that I was in earnest when I gave her my opinion of herinfatuation and herself. It was a marvellous effort of perspicacity todiscover that I did not love her. I believed, at one time, no lessonscould teach her that! And yet it is poorly learnt; for this morning sheannounced, as a piece of appalling intelligence, that I had actuallysucceeded in making her hate me! A positive labour of Hercules, I assureyou! If it be achieved, I have cause to return thanks. Can I trust yourassertion, Isabella? Are you sure you hate me? If I let you alone forhalf a day, won't you come sighing and wheedling to me again? I daresayshe would rather I had seemed all tenderness before you: it wounds hervanity to have the truth exposed. But I don't care who knows that thepassion was wholly on one side: and I never told her a lie about it. Shecannot accuse me of showing one bit of deceitful softness. The firstthing she saw me do, on coming out of the Grange, was to hang up herlittle dog; and when she pleaded for it, the first words I uttered were awish that I had the hanging of every being belonging to her, except one:possibly she took that exception for herself. But no brutality disgustedher: I suppose she has an innate admiration of it, if only her preciousperson were secure from injury! Now, was it not the depth ofabsurdity--of genuine idiotcy, for that pitiful, slavish, mean-mindedbrach to dream that I could love her? Tell your master, Nelly, that Inever, in all my life, met with such an abject thing as she is. She evendisgraces the name of Linton; and I've sometimes relented, from pure lackof invention, in my experiments on what she could endure, and still creepshamefully cringing back! But tell him, also, to set his fraternal andmagisterial heart at ease: that I keep strictly within the limits of thelaw. I have avoided, up to this period, giving her the slightest rightto claim a separation; and, what's more, she'd thank nobody for dividingus. If she desired to go, she might: the nuisance of her presenceoutweighs the gratification to be derived from tormenting her!'
'Mr. Heathcliff,' said I, 'this is the talk of a madman; your wife, mostlikely, is convinced you are mad; and, for that reason, she has bornewith you hitherto: but now that you say she may go, she'll doubtlessavail herself of the permission. You are not so bewitched, ma'am, areyou, as to remain with him of your own accord?'
'Take care, Ellen!' answered Isabella, her eyes sparkling irefully; therewas no misdoubting by their expression the full success of her partner'sendeavours to make himself detested. 'Don't put faith in a single wordhe speaks. He's a lying fiend! a monster, and not a human being! I'vebeen told I might leave him before; and I've made the attempt, but I darenot repeat it! Only, Ellen, promise you'll not mention a syllable of hisinfamous conversation to my brother or Catherine. Whatever he maypretend, he wishes to provoke Edgar to desperation: he says he hasmarried me on purpose to obtain power over him; and he sha'n't obtainit--I'll die first! I just hope, I pray, that he may forget hisdiabolical prudence and kill me! The single pleasure I can imagine is todie, or to see him dead!'
'There--that will do for the present!' said Heathcliff. 'If you arecalled upon in a court of law, you'll remember her language, Nelly! Andtake a good look at that countenance: she's near the point which wouldsuit me. No; you're not fit to be your own guardian, Isabella, now; andI, being your legal protector, must retain you in my custody, howeverdistasteful the obligation may be. Go up-stairs; I have something to sayto Ellen Dean in private. That's not the way: up-stairs, I tell you!Why, this is the road upstairs, child!'
He seized, and thrust her from the room; and returned muttering--'I haveno pity! I have no pity! The more the worms writhe, the more I yearn tocrush out their entrails! It is a moral teething; and I grind withgreater energy in proportion to the increase of pain.'
'Do you understand what the word pity means?' I said, hastening to resumemy bonnet. 'Did you ever feel a touch of it in your life?'
'Put that down!' he interrupted, perceiving my intention to depart. 'Youare not going yet. Come here now, Nelly: I must either persuade orcompel you to aid me in fulfilling my determination to see Catherine, andthat without delay. I swear that I meditate no harm: I don't desire tocause any disturbance, or to exasperate or insult Mr. Linton; I only wishto hear from herself how she is, and why she has been ill; and to ask ifanything that I could do would be of use to her. Last night I was in theGrange garden six hours, and I'll return there to-night; and every nightI'll haunt the place, and every day, till I find an opportunity ofentering. If Edgar Linton meets me, I shall not hesitate to knock himdown, and give him enough to insure his quiescence while I stay. If hisservants oppose me, I shall threaten them off with these pistols. Butwouldn't it be better to prevent my coming in contact with them, or theirmaster? And you could do it so easily. I'd warn you when I came, andthen you might let me in unobserved, as soon as she was alone, and watchtill I departed, your conscience quite calm: you would be hinderingmischief.'
I protested against playing that treacherous part in my employer's house:and, besides, I urged the cruelty and selfishness of his destroying Mrs.Linton's tranquillity for his satisfaction. 'The commonest occurrencestartles her painfully,' I said. 'She's all nerves, and she couldn'tbear the surprise, I'm positive. Don't persist, sir! or else I shall beobliged to inform my master of your designs; and he'll take measures tosecure his house and its inmates from any such unwarrantable intrusions!'
'In that case I'll take measures to secure you, woman!' exclaimedHeathcliff; 'you shall not leave Wuthering Heights till to-morrowmorning. It is a foolish story to assert that Catherine could not bearto see me; and as to surprising her, I don't desire it: you must prepareher--ask her if I may come. You say she never mentions my name, and thatI am never mentioned to her. To whom should she mention me if I am aforbidden topic in the house? She thinks you are all spies for herhusband. Oh, I've no doubt she's in hell among you! I guess by hersilence, as much as anything, what she feels. You say she is oftenrestless, and anxious-looking: is that a proof of tranquillity? You talkof her mind being unsettled. How the devil could it be otherwise in herfrightful isolation? And that insipid, paltry creature attending herfrom _duty_ and _humanity_! From _pity_ and _charity_! He might as wellplant an oak in a flower-pot, and expect it to thrive, as imagine he canrestore her to vigour in the soil of his shallow cares? Let us settle itat once: will you stay here, and am I to fight my way to Catherine overLinton and his footman? Or will you be my friend, as you have beenhitherto, and do what I request? Decide! because there is no reason formy lingering another minute, if you persist in your stubborn ill-nature!'
Well, Mr. Lockwood, I argued and complained, and flatly refused him fiftytimes; but in the long run he forced me to an agreement. I engaged tocarry a letter from him to my mistress; and should she consent, Ipromised to let him have intelligence of Linton's next absence from home,when he might come, and get in as he was able: I wouldn't be there, andmy fellow-servants should be equally out of the way. Was it right orwrong? I fear it was wrong, though expedient. I thought I preventedanother explosion by my compliance; and I thought, too, it might create afavourable crisis in Catherine's mental illness: and then I rememberedMr. Edgar's stern rebuke of my carrying tales; and I tried to smooth awayal
l disquietude on the subject, by affirming, with frequent iteration,that that betrayal of trust, if it merited so harsh an appellation,should be the last. Notwithstanding, my journey homeward was sadder thanmy journey thither; and many misgivings I had, ere I could prevail onmyself to put the missive into Mrs. Linton's hand.
But here is Kenneth; I'll go down, and tell him how much better you are.My history is _dree_, as we say, and will serve to while away anothermorning.
Dree, and dreary! I reflected as the good woman descended to receive thedoctor: and not exactly of the kind which I should have chosen to amuseme. But never mind! I'll extract wholesome medicines from Mrs. Dean'sbitter herbs; and firstly, let me beware of the fascination that lurks inCatherine Heathcliff's brilliant eyes. I should be in a curious takingif I surrendered my heart to that young person, and the daughter turnedout a second edition of the mother.