by Robin Roseau
"Yes, I saw your advertisement for a second-floor apartment. I'm a student and need a place to stay for the summer. I'll rent for four months, but I'll move out early in September." Pause, pause. "I understand, but I'm not signing a one-year lease. I'll be back at school in the fall. However, I can pay for all four months up front, and you even know when I'll move out. I'm clean and quiet, and you don't have to paint the walls before I move in. If I don't like them, I'll do it myself. Do you want my business or not?" Pause, pause. "Excellent. What are your hours today for me to stop by? Excellent. I have some more calls to make, but I'll see you this afternoon."
By the end of the third call, I was staring at her. "How did you do that?"
"It's business," she said. "Yes, they want a one-year lease. But what they want even more is to make as much money as they can. Vacancy rates can vary around the city, but these buildings always have vacancies, and so they're willing to adjust to get four months' rent."
We made several more calls, made a plan, then got in her car.
* * * *
We only looked at three apartments. The first two weren't bad, but I immediately fell in love with the third. Cassidy was watching me, and she recognized the look.
"Don't say a word," she said into my ear. "Pretend you're not sure." Then she stepped away and asked more loudly, "What do you think, Astrid?"
"It's okay, I guess," I said. "I mean. It's got a pool. But is it quiet?"
"This is a very quiet neighborhood," said the rental agent.
"There's a park right over there," I said, pointing out the window. It was actually what I liked most. I could go walking in the park or sit at one of the benches and read.
"There's a curfew," said the agent. "And the police enforce it."
Cassidy stepped away from me, leaving me near the windows, while she talked quietly with the agent. I didn't hear everything she said, but she made the strangest complaints against me. "She's so quiet, it drives me nuts when she stays with me." And then she began negotiating on my behalf.
At one point the agent asked, "Is she going to keep this agreement?"
"She'll do what I tell her," Cassidy said.
I prowled the apartment for a while longer. And then Cassidy called out, "Astrid. You're taking this apartment."
I roamed back into the living room; the two were watching for me.
"You'll take it the way it is," Cassidy said. "You have permission to paint the walls." She iterated the rest of the terms. She hadn't gotten me a reduced rate, so I wasn't sure what negotiating she had done. But she finished with, "Tell Colleen you agree."
I looked at the agent, paused a minute, then nodded. "Agreed," I said.
"Great!" said the woman. "If you're ready, we can go to my office and sign the lease."
We followed the agent. Cassidy looked at my body language and whispered, “What’s wrong? Don’t you like it?”
“I love it, but you didn’t negotiate a reduced rate.”
“You’re only here for three months and don’t have a strong negotiating position,” she replied. “I got you things that don’t cost her anything but that they normally charge for. Do you want the apartment?”
“Yes.”
She reached over and squeezed my shoulder. “Trust me, and I’ll explain more later.”
I nodded.
* * * *
Cassidy read the papers. I signed where I was told to sign. Cassidy and I had already agreed I would pay for the apartment myself. “You need to establish a financial history,” she explained. I did, indeed, pay for the entire lease, plus a security deposit, all in a single check. It was mind-boggling large. But I’d already gone over the numbers, and I would be fine, or at least I would be as long as Cassidy continued to take care of me the way she had.
Yes, I meant as long as she continued to pay me to be her girlfriend.
I still felt weird about that. I thought I’d become inured to it, but at least this far, I hadn’t.
The thing was: I liked Cassidy. I really, really liked Cassidy. There were times I wondered what the future would bring. I tried not to think about it. There was little I could do but continue as I had. But I wondered how long she would keep me. Would I be a one-woman sugar baby until graduation? That was a lot of money for her, and she might prefer 19-year-olds over 22-year-olds. Or she might decide I was old hat. Anything could happen.
If she dumped me, I thought I’d be okay financially. Cassidy was paying me enough I’d be ahead financially at least for a while, and I’d find another sugar mama.
But I didn’t think I’d find one that treated me the way she did, and I liked the way she treated me.
* * * *
Honey and I hugged goodbye. Our relationship had frozen the night she outed me to everyone, in spite of how things were turning out. I’d done a good job hiding Cassidy from her, and she hadn’t even asked where I was the nights I had dates. I don’t know if she figured out I no longer trusted her, or if she was just oblivious.
She had asked about roommates for next year. I told her Maggie and I were going to share a room. I think she was disappointed, but she only said, “Oh,” and found someone else.
Honey and I would remain friendly after that, but I wouldn’t call her a friend, not really, and we didn’t go out of our way to spend time together.
But we hugged goodbye, and she said, “Thank you for being an easy roommate.”
“You were, too,” I said. And that part was true. The college had done a good job pairing us, in that we had similar habits in the dorm. But we hugged goodbye, and it really was goodbye.
Then she was gone.
Cassidy had hired a moving company for me. I didn’t have that much to move, but she’d hired a company, and I had an hour until they would arrive. It was while I was waiting that Maggie stepped over. She had her mother with her. “Bobbie!” I said warmly. I smiled. “We both made it through our first year.”
“And my daughter made some good friends,” Bobbie said, crossing the room to me. “Give me a hug, Astrid.” Yeah, Bobbie was a hugger, and that woman could hug. She enveloped me, and I felt like I disappeared. But then she released me. “So you two are going to be roommates next year.”
“Yep,” I said. “Maggie has turned out to be an amazing friend.”
“I’m glad,” Bobbie said. “Will we see you this summer?”
“Count on it,” I said.
“Maggie said you rented an apartment.”
“Just for the summer,” I said. “And a friend loaned me a scooter, but I don’t think I can make it all the way to Richfield with it.”
“Well, you’re always welcome,” Bobbie said. “And honey, if you need a Mom, I’m here.”
That was really sweet, and I teared up a little from that. A lump formed in my throat, and couldn’t speak immediately, but I nodded and clasped her hands for a moment. She squeezed back and said, “I didn’t mean to make you sad.”
“It’s just very kind,” I managed to say.
“I know you’re all grown up,” Bobbie said, “But there’s grown up, and there’s grown up. I still need my mother sometimes. I don’t think that ever ends. I’m so thankful she as healthy as she is.”
“I bet,” I said.
“All right. I’ll give you girls a minute, but Maggie, I only took a half day. You’ll have to drop me off and get me later.”
“Right, Mom. We’ll be quick.”
“I’ll wait at the car.” Then she stepped out, pulling the door closed behind her.
Maggie and I turned to each other. She smiled. “You’re going to be okay,” she said to me.
“Yeah. Thanks to you.” I closed the distance and hugged her. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome. Is she coming to get you?”
“No. A moving company. I’m seeing her later.”
“I took some of her advice,” she said. We separated. When I looked at her, she was biting her lip. “I apologized to Cherlyn. She was actually cool about it and said sh
e understood.”
“That’s good.”
“And then I told Dad I wanted to know what had happened to my horse, and I wasn’t accepting any more of his vague answers. He tried to put me off, but before I could scream, Cherlyn told him I deserved an adult answer.”
“Wow.”
“When she found out they’d taken her from me without letting me say goodbye, she raised a fit.”
“Wow,” I said again.
“I’m going to get to see her this weekend.”
“That’s great!”
“Dad promised me she’s being treated well. He says she belongs to a nice family with a girl just like I used to be.”
“Did he really put it that way?”
“He meant gaga over horses,” Maggie said. “It’s fine. Dad and Cherlyn offered to go with me.”
“That’s good.”
“I told them I’d let them know. But do you think you and Cassidy would come with me instead? It’s Saturday morning. I’m meeting them at 10. If we ride together, we’d have to leave about 9. It’s out in Delano.”
“Are your parents coming?”
“Not if you and Cassidy come,” she said.
“Are you sure you want us?” I asked.
“I’m sure. Astrid, I’m going to cry, and I might have apologized to Cherlyn, but I don’t want her thinking she’s going to turn motherly on me now.”
I thought about it then nodded. “I’ll ask Cassidy tonight. I can’t answer for her. But I can tell you what she’s going to tell you.”
“Give Cherlyn more of a chance?”
“Yeah. Face it: you kind of have two moms now.”
“I’d let you have one of them,” she said. Then she winced. “That was stupid.”
“No, it wasn’t,” I said. I smiled. “Cassidy told me that she hopes you’ll join us for meals and events this summer.”
“I’d like that.” She grinned and wriggled her fingers at me. I wave a finger back. “That was the funniest thing, and you know it.”
“One of us enjoyed it more than the other.”
“I think that’s a lie.” I honestly thought about it, but before I could respond, she said, “Or maybe it’s not.” Her features fell.
“Oh, hey,” I said. “The first time she did it to me, when it was over, I told her she could do that all she wanted. I don’t want to get double teamed every time you come over, though. All right?”
“All right,” she said. “But sometimes?”
“Sometimes,” I agreed.
“I better go. Call me about Saturday.”
“I will.”
* * * *
The movers took care of everything. Cassidy had been right; she had arranged a good deal. I hadn’t really thought about it when I’d first been put out. But she had arranged underground parking for the scooter, which I’d bring back the next time I came back from Cassidy’s. Because it was just a scooter and didn’t need a full place, I got a little corner spot right near the stairs, and the rental agent had been okay about throwing it in for no additional charge.
But the bigger deal was this: the apartment came partially furnished. I hadn’t listened to all the details, and at the time I wasn’t curious enough to ask about it. But there was a dinette table with four chairs, a living room sofa and chair, lamps, and a bedframe.
Cassidy took me shopping for the other things I would need. We began with a mattress and bedding. And then she had taken me to a kitchen store. I immediately balked. “You just spent a ton of money buying me a mattress,” I said.
“You need these things.”
“No,” I said. “I can get what I need at a garage sale or estate auction,” I said.
“Astrid.”
“Cassidy,” I said. “I’m a college girl.”
“I know you’re a college girl.”
“What am I going to do with this stuff in September?”
“I’ll store it for you.”
“Cassidy, do you expect to spend much time at the apartment, or will I be at home, waiting for you when you get home from work?”
She smiled. “The latter.”
“So you don’t expect dinners and overnights at the apartment?”
“No.”
“So it’s not like you’ll look at what I have and be grossed out or something.”
She laughed. “No.”
“Then I want to do the rest on the cheap. I’m glad I don’t have to do that with the mattress. Thank you.”
“You’re welcome,” she said. She kissed my forehead, about the biggest show of affection we exchanged in public. “All right. You’re the boss.”
“Not hardly,” I said.
“On this,” she adjusted.
“We both know I’d do what you told me to do,” I said quietly. “But this is wasting money.”
She nodded to that, and we’d left the kitchen store without a thing. In her car, she pulled out her phone, played with it for a minute, and then she took me on a loop of garage sales. It was the third when we basically hit the jackpot. Two people had combined households, and they were selling practically everything I could imagine. Cassidy had been ready to buy practically their entire stock, but I told her, “Place setting for four. Basic pots and pans. And that toaster oven.”
She laughed and then added the microwave to the list.
The movers had all of it with them.
* * * *
I spent the afternoon by the pool.
* * * *
“Well, well,” Cassidy said, as she roamed the apartment. “You’re settled in.”
“Thanks to the movers,” I said. “They were really nice.” I paused. “Cassidy. Thank you.”
She barely looked at me. “You’re welcome, Astrid.” She roamed for a minute then stood at the window.
Finally, I moved to her side. “What’s wrong?”
“Just a little maudlin,” she said. “I don’t mean to be a downer.”
I laid my head on her shoulder. “You’re not a downer.”
She didn’t turn to me, but she said, “I want to ask you something, and I expect the truth.”
“I’d never lie to you.”
“People lie,” she said. “Are you waiting for the other shoe to drop?”
I knew immediately what she was asking. It made me cold inside that she asked. “Yes,” I said in a small voice.
“You’d be okay if it did.”
“Cassidy.”
“I worry about it, too.”
“You do?”
“It’s not hard to find a sugar baby.”
“Oh, God,” I thought. “She’s about to dump me.” I didn’t say that, instead, I made a joke of it. “There are these websites, I understand.”
“Exactly. And while they aren’t necessarily filled with young, attractive women looking for a relationship with an older woman, there are choices.”
“I imagine.”
“The thing is, Astrid.” That was when she turned to me. “None of them would be you.”
I practically threw myself on her. She wrapped her arms around me and held me. “I thought you were about to dump me.”
“I’m sorry. I was so caught up with myself, I didn’t think of that. No, Astrid, I have no intention of dumping you.”
“I cost you a lot of money.”
“And you give to me everything I could possibly want,” she replied. “But here’s the thing. With another girl, I might think she was only doing it for the money while secretly hating it.”
“I don’t hate any of it.”
“I know,” she said. We both tightened. “As far as I’m concerned, there are no shoes waiting to drop on you.”
“You’ll grow tired of me eventually, or tired of supporting me.”
“If you change who you are, that’s possible,” she agreed. “And people change. That’s part of growing up.”
I didn’t say anything. I simply clung to her, letting her know how I felt about all of this by the way I was holding her. She
was the one to break us apart, but only enough to look into my eyes. “So.”
“So,” I replied.
“I’m torn.”
“Oh?”
“I haven’t decided if I want to initiate your new apartment, or take you home and do utterly delicious things to you.”
“I can be a lot louder if you take me home.”
She laughed. “Then we have our answer.”
She took me home. She did utterly delicious things to me. I was very, very loud.
* * * *
“I nearly forgot.”
“Forgot what? Can this wait?”
“I’d rather not,” I said. “Two minutes.” She nodded. I explained about Maggie and her horse. “She would like us to come. She mentioned picking her up.”
Cassidy looked into open space for a minute then focused her attention on me. “What do you want, Astrid?”
“I want what is best for Maggie coupled with whatever you want.”
“Uh, huh,” she replied. “What is best for Maggie is if she can rebuild her relationship with her parents, and let this Cherlyn person have a proper chance.”
“So I should tell her you don’t want to go?”
“No. I think maybe this is too much for her all at once. Tell her if she wants us there, we’ll come, but she’s making a promise to me.”
“What promise?”
“To give Cherlyn a real chance. It sounds like she’s actually a decent person, and unless she was having an affair with Maggie’s father, she’s not to blame for the divorce.”
“From what I understand, they met in some sort of singles event after the papers were signed.”
“All right. That’s the agreement. She makes a promise to me, and I expect her to be earnest about it.”
I thought about it. “All right. Why are you doing it that way? I don’t imagine you really care that much.”
“That’s not true. I do care. She’s your friend, and we wouldn’t be together without her influence. I feel I owe her a great deal. I also want what is best for her.”
“I’ll tell her.”
“If she can’t give me that promise, it’s your choice if you go without me,” she said. “I won’t hold it against you.”
“I’ll think about that.” I smiled. “Do you want me here when you get home?”
“Yes.”