by Jen Peters
Back then, her family didn’t know why she’d filed for divorce; she couldn’t let go of her pride enough to admit that she hadn’t walked away the first time he’d hurt her. But when Brock wouldn’t let her go, when he came charging into her mother’s house, shoved Mia into the wall, and grabbed Maddy by the hair, it was no secret anymore.
Police, hospital, pictures, the whole rigamarole was embarrassing. And the restraining order didn’t help. When Brock violated it by breaking her door down and punching her, the judge put him away fast enough. Just not long enough.
He was released on the one-year anniversary of their divorce, but he hadn’t learned anything. Threats, stalking, a note using Mia as leverage—Maddy couldn’t chance it anymore.
She had tucked her tail and run, staying in a motel in Grand Junction until she lucked into the Black Rock Ranch’s newspaper ad. She blessed Samuel once more for agreeing to keep her secret, as well as for hiring her. The only way Brock would find her here would be for someone to tell him, and nobody knew.
She ached for her far-away family, though. Nonna, her mom, her sister especially. The girl-talk, the crowded kitchen on Sundays, letting her niece put make-up on Mia, listening to her nephews tease each other…
She somehow pushed an over-chewed bite past the lump in her throat. The juicy beef had lost its appeal, and she set both her memories and the sandwich aside to examine the large room. She had never been here early enough to join the cowboys at breakfast, but she understood that Uncle Dirt cooked up quite a spread to keep them going all morning. And sometimes all day.
Two large, worn trestle tables and their benches combined with the barstools at the counter to be able to seat everyone. The six-burner range was spotless, as were the long counters. If Uncle Dirt hadn’t been a neat-freak when he was a working cowboy, he certainly was now. She wondered if he’d let her and Lacey come cook in here sometime—there was certainly more room for complicated things than in her own small kitchen.
She opened drawers and cupboards until she found the plastic wrap and stored the remains of her sandwich in the fridge for later. The men finally finished their call from Iraq, and Caleb said he was heading for the barn to get the horses ready.
Maddy tensed again—was she really ready for this?
Adam came in and perused her outfit. She knew her jeans and long-sleeved shirt were suitable, but her tennis shoes?
“That won’t do,” he said, smiling as he shook his head. “Let’s see what we can dig out for you.”
She followed him to the basement, her previous thoughts making her a little hesitant. Adam began pulling boxes and totes down, opening and closing them until he said, “A-ha!” He pulled out various sizes of cowboy boots, some worn and scuffed, some almost new.
Maddy looked at the grin on his face, so very different from Brock. His eyes sparkled with the satisfaction of his quest. She smiled back—Adam was a man of honor, the total opposite of her ex-husband.
“These are the ones we outgrew,” he said. “Even with four of us, some of them never got more than a few weeks’ wear. There’s sure to be something here to fit you.” He motioned her to an old chair and backed away.
Wondering about his perception, but grateful for it, Maddy tried on several pairs until she found some comfortable ones. “Okay?”
“Perfect. Let’s go,” Adam said. He almost jogged to the front door, clearly eager to hit the trail. She only hoped she wouldn’t slow him down.
Or embarrass herself.
At the stables, Caleb greeted her cheerily. “Hiya, Maddy! I’ve got Chester here ready to go for you.”
“I thought you’d get Big Blue out, not Chester,” Adam said.
“No go. Blue’s lame in the right front—Dr. Sue and Wes looked at her after the calves. Not sure what happened, but she shouldn’t be ridden,” Caleb answered. “Chester is just as calm, though. And a bit more Maddy’s size.”
Adam smiled slightly over at Maddy, as if he weren’t sure about her suitability for this.
Chester was a short sorrel gelding with a wide white blaze down his face. Maddy stretched her hand out to him to let him sniff, the way her childhood friend had taught her all those years ago. She had gotten to ride occasionally through those third- and fourth-grade years until her friend had moved away.
She probably didn’t remember anything correctly, but Chester looked friendly enough. He whuffled at her hand, and she wished she’d brought something to offer him.
Adam stepped sideways to her and held out a carrot piece. Maddy took it, offered it to the gelding, and grinned when he took it gently and started crunching.
“Adam said you haven’t ridden in a while?” Caleb asked.
“Not since I was a kid. You’ll have to start at the beginning with me.”
Caleb chuckled. “No problem. Everyone has to start somewhere. Chester’s a good old guy, pretty obedient, doesn’t pull too much. Let’s get you up and check your stirrups.”
“You’ve got Lacey’s show saddle—we thought it would fit you better,” Adam added.
Old adolescent, picked-on feelings rose suddenly. “Why, because she has a big rear end, too?”
Adam took a step back. “What? No!” He motioned to the big roping saddle on his bay. “You wouldn’t be very comfortable in one of these. Too big and not enough padding.”
“Oh.” Maddy felt her face flush. But was it really her fault that everyone in the world focused on how slender a woman was? She was half Italian, her family gatherings centered around food, and she’d given up fighting her body shape years ago. Evidently she hadn’t given up on being sensitive about it, though. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to …it’s just…”
Adam held his hands up in defense. “I may not have learned much about women, but I do know not to make comments about size!”
Caleb laughed. “Way to put your foot in it, bro! Keep talking and let’s see what else you can come up with.”
“Yeah?” Adam’s smile had a dangerous twitch to it. “Might I remind you of your failure to say no to Cassie McLeod?”
“But that was…I only… Oh, never mind. You guys have a good ride.” Caleb handed Chester’s reins to Maddy and walked away with hunched shoulders.
“What was that?” Maddy asked, turning to pet her horse.
“Oh, just brother stuff.” Adam chuckled. “A girl who wanted to glom onto him, and he couldn’t convince her he just wasn’t interested.”
Maddy heated inside. ‘Interested’ was a word that had been on her mind lately. She knew without asking that Adam was interested in her. She could tell from the way he looked at her, the things he’d said. And that was a delicious feeling, even if she didn’t know if she wanted to respond.
She said a silent prayer for safety and not to look too stupid. Adam helped her gather her reins in her left hand, then gave her a leg up. Swinging her leg over the saddle was harder than it looked, and she felt lucky to not have popped a seam during the stretch. Once she was settled, Adam shortened her stirrups, reminded her to sit up, and gave her a refresher in steering and stopping.
Chester walked where she wanted and stopped when she told him, and she breathed a sigh of relief. Quick answers to prayers were wonderful, and she hoped it would continue.
Adam mounted smoothly, looking like he’d been on a horse his whole life. Which he probably had. She wondered what it would have been like to grow up out here with livestock and wild mountains instead of in the suburbs. She’d never know, but Mia would. At least for a little while.
14
Instead of following the river, Adam led the way across a pasture (empty of bulls, thank goodness). He pointed out the black granite boulder on a hill that, along with the family name, had become the ranch’s brand. He told stories of the ancestor who went mining for gold, silver and lead, only to make his fortune in beef.
Maddy paid attention as best she could, adjusting to her horse’s movement and marveling at the joy in Adam’s face. She’d never seen him like this before.
Adam maneuvered Mister to stand close enough to the gate that he could open it without getting off. Then he somehow got his horse to sidestep and pivot, so that he swung the gate open and ended up on the other side of it.
Maddy shook her head in amazement. That was something her friend had never tried. She nudged Chester forward, and Adam moved Mister to close the gate once she was through.
The man might have a temper he tried to keep hidden, but he also had to have a lot of patience to teach a horse to respond that well.
They walked across the rest of the grass to a trail that led through the trees, and Maddy savored the sense of relaxation and freedom. “The trail’s going to narrow soon. Want to try a jog-trot?”
“Uh…sure?” Mandy answered slowly.
“Don’t kick him, just squeeze your calves against his belly. You can either stand in your stirrups and hold his mane or the saddle horn for balance, or you can just sit a little deeper in the saddle. He’s got a pretty smooth gait, so I’d suggest sitting.”
She tightened her legs against him, but he only walked faster.
Adam chuckled and nudged Mister into a slow jog. “He doesn’t want to be in the lead.”
Sure enough, when Maddy squeezed again, Chester began to jog. She yelped, bounced a time or two, then settled into his rhythm. “Hey, this is okay!” she called to Adam.
He looked over and grinned. “You’re doing great. You can hold the horn if you need to, but don’t forget to sit up. You’re all hunched over.”
They jogged for a moment, then Adam pulled back to a walk. Maddy sighed in relief as Chester slowed automatically.
“Have you always ridden?” she asked once she caught her breath.
Adam shrugged. “I think Mom had me up on a horse before I could walk. At least, I don’t remember learning how.”
“Did you start on a big horse, or did you have a pony first?”
He chuckled and shook his head. “Grandpa gave me a pony when I was three. Called him Two Bits because that was all he was worth.”
“Two bits?”
“A quarter. As in, ‘Shave and a haircut, two bits,’ you know.”
“O-kaay.”
“He was a stubborn Shetland, used to put his head down and run for the barn. I couldn’t pull him up for the life of me, just had to hang on and hope he didn’t rub me off against a fence post.”
Maddy’s mouth dropped open.
Adam grinned. “You can guess how excited I was when Dad got me a Quarter Horse/Welsh pony cross when I was six. Much better behaved.”
“So what happened to Two Bits?”
His grin stretched wider. “He was duly inherited by Caleb and then Micah. I think Dad figured he would teach us determination. He’d slowed down some by the time Seth got him, and Seth was smart enough to drop one rein and haul on the other, turning him in a wide circle. I don’t know why the rest of us never figured that out.”
The trail became narrow enough that they had to go single file. It began rising, and Maddy clung to the saddle horn as they climbed.
“Loosen your reins, and he’ll make his own way,” Adam called back.
She did, trusting Chester a bit, but trusting Adam’s knowledge of the horse even more. Sure enough, Chester kept his nose almost in Mister’s tail and stepped evenly up the slope.
“So,” Maddy said when she could concentrate on something besides the powerful horse underneath her, “Seth is your youngest brother?”
Adam twisted to talk to her, his gelding still climbing upwards. “Yes, poor guy. I think we all picked on him. He’s off in Iraq now. Third tour of duty.”
Oh. What was an appropriate response to that? ‘I’m sorry’ would sound inane. ‘I hope he’s safe?’ No, Maddy didn’t think there was any job over there that was safe.
“You must be proud of him,” she finally said. “I’ll add him to my prayers.”
Adam looked forward for a moment, then turned again. “Thanks, and we are proud. Nobody wanted him to re-up the first time, let alone the second, but he felt like he needed to. Band of Brothers and all that.”
Maddy thought about that, about how she would feel if her nephews decided to not only join the military, but to stay in.
“I hope I get to meet him sometime,” she finally said. “You guys must be pretty strong, too. It takes a lot of courage to serve, but it takes a lot to stay home and support them, too.”
Adam was facing forward again by then, tall and straight in the saddle. Maddy couldn’t tell how he’d reacted to her words, but she didn’t regret them.
“It gets really steep right here,” Adam called back to her. “Stand in your stirrups just a little and let yourself tilt forward. That will free up his back so he can climb easier.”
She did, keeping one hand on the saddle horn and one in his mane. She clenched the reins in her fingers and was glad she didn’t have to steer him as long as Mister was in front. She rocked back and forth a bit, trying to keep her balance while he took uneven strides. He lurched at the top, and she pitched forward onto his neck. “Ooof!”
“Yeah, that last bit can be a little rough,” Adam said, sitting oh-so-naturally in the saddle at the top.
The top. It wasn’t the actual top of the mountain, but the wide meadow was filled with wildflowers poking through patchy snow and overlooked the whole valley. The Ouray River sparkled below. The bulls clumped together like a mass of ants, the mares were equally tiny, and the foals frolicked like minuscule pixies.
“Wow, you can see the entire ranch!” Maddy exclaimed.
Adam chuckled. “Not really, just the home pastures.” He waved his arm to the side and behind. “Our acreage covers a lot of these mountains. The cows and calves are up here for the summer.” He pointed across the valley. “The Manning Ranch leases a lot of the land over there, and the Lazy S takes the mountains on the north side of the valley.”
“Lease? It’s not all yours?”
He smiled. “We’re not that rich. We’ve got about 4,000 acres of our own, which I’ll admit is a good bit, and then we lease about 50,000 more from the Bureau of Land Management.”
She soaked in the view, turned to look at the mountain range behind her, and inhaled the crisp air rather greedily. “You don’t get this in Den—Los Angeles,” she said, shaking inwardly at her slip. No matter how nice Adam was being, she had to stick to her story. “Especially not in the suburbs. I mean, you can see the mountains, but the air pollution is pretty bad.” She should be safe with that. Denver could be bad, but LA was worse. At least from what she’d heard.
Adam shook his head. “I don’t think I could stand city living. I need my animals, my mountains and the freedom to range.”
Country life was growing on Maddy, too. She loved the incredible view up here, but she liked the “home acres” on the ranch, too. It was generally quiet, and she liked the connection with the natural world. The farm tractors made noise, but nothing like rush hour traffic at home. Or the fumes! Of course, staying away from the animals meant she didn’t often smell anything other than dirt and hay and fresh breezes.
“So have you always been a city girl?” Adam asked, breaking her reverie.
She had to stay as close to the truth as she could, but still keep Denver out of it. “Spent all my time at the restaurant or the office or my favorite stores if I wasn’t home.”
“Not much shopping out here,” he said.
“No, but that’s what I wanted. No chance for—” She mentally slapped herself again. Why was she suddenly forgetting?
Adam wasn’t going to let it go, though. “No chance for what?” He shifted in his saddle so he could look straight at her.
She couldn’t evade those piercing blue eyes completely, and decided she could say just a little. “No chance for my ex to find me. He’s…he’s a pretty nasty person.”
Now Adam looked truly concerned. “I got the feeling maybe he abused you.”
Maddy didn’t want to explain anything else. Too much turmoil t
hat would come along with it. She shrugged. “I finally left.”
She watched Adam’s fist clench until his knuckles were white.
“It’s okay, it really is,” she reassured him. “He didn’t do any permanent damage, but I’d just as soon he not find me. And I’d appreciate it if you didn’t go spread it around—I don’t like people pitying me.”
Adam looked away and took a deep breath. And another. When he finally turned back, he seemed calmer. “Did you know we’ve got bald eagles nesting on the ranch?”
“Really?” Maddy looked around, scrutinizing the pine trees. “Where?”
“They’re one ridge over.” He pointed, then eyed her speculatively. “It makes a long day, but if you keep coming out with me, you’ll be able to handle that ride before long. Hopefully before they leave.”
Riding with Adam. The thought warmed Maddy through. “How soon is that?”
“Another month and a half or so. They fledge in May or June, and once the eaglets are in full flight, they leave. But the parents usually come back in January or February to lay a new set of eggs.”
Maddy stifled her disappointment. Watching bald eagles soar always seemed so…romantic? Patriotic? Empowering? So many things, and she still couldn’t come up with the right word. Maybe just that they gave her a sense of majesty, even on television.
She shifted in the saddle, stretching a little.
“We’d better head back,” Adam said. “You’re really going to be sore tomorrow.”
Her tired muscles agreed, and she knew that they’d be far worse the next day. A hot bath would be in order after Mia was in bed.
They rode back, with Maddy clinging for all she was worth during the steep downslope. When they leveled out and she could relax again, she realized just how comfortable she felt with Adam.
True, he was a serious guy, but he’d opened up enough for her to know him a little better. She’d shared rather too much of herself, but so be it. It was enough to begin a friendship.
And those intense blue eyes of his! Her heart pounded as she remembered the way they sparkled with humor or darkened with concern. She could spend a long time looking into those eyes.