IV
The next morning Eve behaved to her husband exactly as if nothinguntoward had happened. She kissed and was kissed. She exhibitedsweetness without gaiety, and a general curiosity without interest. Shesaid not a word concerning the visit of Sissie and Ozzie. She expressedthe hope that Mr. Prohack had had a pleasant evening and slept well. Heranxiety to be agreeable to Mr. Prohack was touching,--it was angelic. Tothe physical eye all was as usual, but Mr. Prohack was aware that in asingle night she had built a high and unscalable wall between him andher; a wall which he could see through and which he could kiss through,but which debarred him utterly from her. And yet what sin had hecommitted against her, save the peccadillo of locking her for an hour ortwo in a comfortable room? It was Sissie, not he, who had committed thesin. He wanted to point this out to Eve, but he appreciated the entirefutility of doing so and therefore refrained. About eleven o'clock Eveknocked at and opened his study door.
"May I come in--or am I disturbing you?" she asked brightly.
"Don't be a silly goose," said Mr. Prohack, whose rising temper--hehated angels--was drowning his tact. Smiling as though he had thrown hera compliment, Eve came in, and shut the door.
"I've just received this," she said. "It came by messenger." And shehanded him a letter signed with the name of Crewd, the privatedetective. The letter ran: "Madam, I beg to inform you that I have justascertained that the driver of taxi No. 5437 has left at New ScotlandYard a pearl necklace which he found in his vehicle. He states that hedrove a lady and gentleman from your house to Waterloo Station on theevening of your reception, but can give no description of them. Imention the matter _pro forma_, but do not anticipate that it caninterest you as the police authorities at New Scotland Yard declare thepearls to be false. Yours obediently.... P.S. I called upon you in orderto communicate the above facts yesterday, but you were not at home."
Mr. Prohack turned a little pale, and his voice trembled as he said,looking up from the letter:
"I wonder who the thief was. Anyhow, women are staggering. Here somewoman--I'm sure it was the woman and not the man--picks up a necklacefrom the floor of one of your drawing-rooms, well knowing it not to beher own, hides it, makes off with it, and then is careless enough toleave it in a taxi! Did you ever hear of such a thing?"
"But that wasn't my necklace, Arthur!" said Eve.
"Of course it was your necklace," said Mr. Prohack.
"Do you mean to tell me--" Eve began, and it was a new Eve.
"Of course I do!" said Mr. Prohack, who had now thoroughly subdued histemper in the determination to bring to a head that trouble about thenecklace and end it for ever. He was continuing his remarks when thewall suddenly fell down with an unimaginable crash. Eve said nothing,but the soundless crash deafened Mr. Prohack. Nevertheless the mere factthat Sissie's wedding lay behind and not before him, helped him somewhatto keep his spirits and his nerve.
"I will never forgive you, Arthur!" said Eve with the most solemn andterrible candour. She no longer played a part; she was her formidableself, utterly unmasked and savagely expressive without any regard toconsequences. Mr. Prohack saw that he was engaged in a mortal duel, withthe buttons off the deadly foils.
"Of course you won't," said he, gathering himself heroically together,and superbly assuming a calm which he did not in the least feel. "Ofcourse you won't, because there is nothing to forgive. On the contrary,you owe me your thanks. I never deceived you. I never told you thepearls were genuine. Indeed I beg to remind you that I once told youpositively that I would never buy you a _pearl_ necklace,--don't youremember? You thought they were genuine, and you have had just as muchpleasure out of them as if they had been genuine. You were alwayscareless with your jewellery. Think how I should have suffered if I hadwatched you every day being careless with a rope of genuine pearls! Ishould have had no peace of mind. I should have been obliged to reproachyou, and as you can't bear to be reproached you would have pickedquarrels with me. Further, you have lost nothing in prestige, for thereason that all our friends and acquaintances have naturally assumedthat the pearls were genuine because they were your pearls and you werethe wife of a rich man. A woman whose husband's financial position isnot high and secure is bound to wear real pearls because people will_assume_ that her pearls are false. But a woman like yourself can wearany pinchbeak pearls with impunity because people _assume_ that herpearls are genuine. In your case there could be no advantage whatever ingenuine pearls. To buy them would be equivalent to throwing money in thestreet. Now, as it is, I have saved money over the pearls, and thereforeinterest on money, though I did buy you the very finest procurableimitations! And think, my child, how relieved you are now,--oh, yes! youare, so don't pretend the contrary: I can deceive you, but you can'tdeceive me. You have no grievance whatever. You have had many hours ofinnocent satisfaction in your false jewels, and nobody is any the worse.Indeed my surpassing wisdom in the choice of a necklace has saved youfrom all further worry about the loss of the necklace, because it simplydoesn't matter either one way or the other, and I say I defy you tostand there and tell me to my face that you have any grievance at all."
Mr. Prohack paused for a reply, and he got it.
"I will never forgive you as long as I live," said Eve. "Let us say nomore about it. What time is that awful lunch that you've arranged withthat dreadful Bishop man? And what would you like me to wear, please?"In an instant she had rebuilt the wall, higher than ever.
Mr. Prohack, always through the wall, took her in his arms and kissedher. But he might as well have kissed a woman in a trance. All thatcould be said was that Eve submitted to his embrace, and her attitudewas another brilliant illustration of the fact that the most powerfuloriental tyrants can be defied by their weakest slaves, provided thatthe weakest slaves know how to do it.
"You are splendid!" said Mr. Prohack, admiringly, conscious anew of hispassion for her and full of trust in the virtue of his passion to knockdown the wall sooner or later. "But you are a very naughty andungrateful creature, and you must be punished. I will now proceed topunish you. We have much to do before the lunch. Go and get ready, andsimply put on all the clothes that have cost the most money. They arethe clothes fittest for your punishment."
Three-quarters of an hour later, when Mr. Prohack had telephoned andsent a confirmatory note by hand to his bank, Carthew drove them awaysouthwards, and the car stopped in front of the establishment of a verycelebrated firm of jewellers near Piccadilly.
"Come along," said Mr. Prohack, descending to the pavement, and drewafter him a moving marble statue, richly attired. They entered theglittering shop, and were immediately encountered by an expectantsalesman who had the gifts of wearing a frock-coat as though he had beenborn in it, and of reading the hearts of men. That salesman saw in aflash that big business was afoot.
"First of all," said Mr. Prohack. "Here is my card, so that we may knowwhere we stand."
The salesman read the card and was suitably impressed, but hisconviction that big business was afoot seemed now to be a little shaken.
"May I venture to hope that the missing necklace has been found, sir?"said the salesman smoothly. "We've all been greatly interested in thenewspaper story."
"That is beside the point," said Mr. Prohack. "I've come simply to buy apearl necklace."
"I beg pardon, sir. Certainly. Will you have the goodness to step thisway."
They were next in a private room off the shop; and the sole items offurniture were three elegant chairs, a table with a glass top, and acolossal safe. Another salesman entered the room with bows, and keyswere produced, and the two salesmen between them swung back the majesticdark green doors of the safe. In another minute various pearl necklaceswere lying on the table. The spectacle would have dazzled a connoisseurin pearls; but Mr. Prohack was not a connoisseur; he was not eveninterested in pearls, and saw on the table naught but a monotonous arrayof pleasing gewgaws, to his eye differing one from another only in size.He was, however, actuated by a high moral purpose, which uplif
ted himand enabled him to listen with dignity to the technical eulogies givenby the experts. Eve of course behaved with impeccable correctness,hiding the existence of the wall from everybody except Mr. Prohack, butforcing Mr. Prohack to behold the wall all the time.
When he had reached a state of complete bewilderment regarding therespective merits of the necklaces, Mr. Prohack judged the moment ripefor proceeding to business. With his own hands he clasped a necklaceround his wife's neck, and demanded:
"What is the price of this one?"
"Eight hundred and fifty pounds," answered the principal expert, whoseemed to recognise every necklace at sight as a shepherd recognisesevery sheep in his flock.
"Do you think this would suit you, my dear?" asked Mr. Prohack.
"I think so," replied Eve politely.
"Well, I'm not so sure," said Mr. Prohack, reflectively. "What aboutthis one?" And he picked up and tried upon Eve another and a largernecklace.
"That," said the original expert, "is two thousand four hundredguineas."
"It seems cheap," said Mr. Prohack carelessly. "But there's somethingabout the gradation that I don't quite like. What about this one?"
Eve opened her mouth, as if about to speak, but she did not speak. Thewall, which had trembled for a few seconds, regained its monumentalsolidity.
"Five thousand guineas," said the expert of the third necklace.
"Hm!" commented Mr. Prohack, removing the gewgaw. "Yes. Not so bad. Andyet--"
"That necklace," the expert announced with a mien from which alldeference had vanished, "is one of the most perfect we have. The pearlshave, if I may so express it, a homogeneity not often arrived at in anynecklace. They are not very large of course--"
"Quite so," Mr. Prohack stopped him, selecting a fourth necklace.
"Yes," the expert admitted, his deference returning. "That one isundoubtedly superior. Let me see, we have not yet exactly valued it, butI think we could put it in at ten thousand guineas--perhaps pounds. Ishould have to consult one of the partners."
"It is scarcely," said Mr. Prohack, surveying the trinket judicially onhis wife's neck, "scarcely the necklace of my dreams,--not that I wouldsay a word against it.... Ah!" And he pounced suddenly, with an air ofdelighted surprise, upon a fifth necklace, the queen of necklaces.
"My dear, try this one. Try this one. I didn't notice it before. Somehowit takes my fancy, and as I shall obviously see much more of yournecklace than you will, I should like my taste to be consulted."
As he fastened the catch of the thing upon Eve's delicious nape, hecould feel that she was trembling. He surveyed the dazzling string. Shealso surveyed it, fascinated, spellbound. Even Mr. Prohack began toperceive that the reputation and value of fine pearls might perhaps benot entirely unmerited in the world.
"Sixteen thousand five hundred," said the expert.
"Pounds or guineas?" Mr. Prohack blandly enquired.
"Well, sir, shall we say pounds?"
"I think I will take it," said Mr. Prohack with undiminished blandness."No, my dear, don't take it off. Don't take it off."
"Arthur!" Eve breathed, seeming to expire in a kind of agonised protest.
"May I have a few minutes' private conversation with my wife?" Mr.Prohack suggested. "Could you leave us?" One expert glanced at the otherawkwardly.
"Pardon my lack of savoir vivre," said Mr. Prohack. "Of course youcannot possibly leave us alone with all these valuables. Never mind! Wewill call again."
The principal expert rose sublimely to the great height of the occasion.He had a courageous mind and was moreover well acquainted with thefantastic folly of allowing customers to call again. Within hisexperience of some thirty years he had not met half a dozen exceptionsto the rule that customers who called again, if ever they did call,called in a mood of hard and miserly sanity which for the purposes ofthe jewellery business was sickeningly inferior to their original mood.
"Please, please, Mr. Prohack!" said he, with grand deprecation, anddeparted out of the room with his fellow.
No sooner had they gone than the wall sank. It did not tumble with acrash; it most gently subsided.
"Arthur!" Eve exclaimed, with a curious uncertainty of voice. "Are youmad?"
"Yes," said Mr. Prohack.
"Well," said she. "If you think I shall walk about London with sixteenthousand five hundred pounds round my neck you're mistaken."
"But I insist! You were a martyr and our marriage was ruined because Ididn't give you real pearls. I intend you shall have real pearls."
"But not these," said Eve. "It's too much. It's a fortune."
"I am aware of that," Mr. Prohack agreed. "But what is sixteen thousandfive hundred pounds to me?"
"Truly I couldn't, darling," Eve wheedled.
"I am not your darling," said Mr. Prohack. "How can I be your darlingwhen you're never going to forgive me? Look here. I'll let you chooseanother necklace, but only on the condition that you forgive all myalleged transgressions, past, present and to come."
She kissed him.
"You can have the one at five thousand guineas," said Mr. Prohack."Nothing less. That is my ultimatum. Put it on. Put it on, quick! Or Imay change my mind."
He recalled the experts who, when they heard the grave news, smiledbravely, and looked upon Eve as upon a woman whose like they might neversee again.
"My wife will wear the necklace at once," said Mr. Prohack. "Pen andink, please." He wrote a cheque. "My car is outside. Perhaps you willsend some one up to my bank immediately and cash this. We will wait. Ihave warned the bank. There will be no delay. The case can be deliveredat my house. You can make out the receipt and usual guarantee whilewe're waiting." And so it occurred as he had ordained.
"Would you care for us to arrange for the insurance? We undertake to doit as cheaply as anybody," the expert suggested, later.
Mr. Prohack was startled, for in his inexperience he had not thought ofsuch complications.
"I was just going to suggest it," he answered placidly.
"I feel quite queer," said Eve, as she fingered the necklace, in thecar, when all formalities were accomplished and they had left the caveof Aladdin.
"And well you may, my child," said Mr. Prohack. "The interest on theprice of that necklace would about pay the salary of a member ofParliament or even of a professional cricketer. And remember thatwhenever you wear the thing you are in danger of being waylaid, brutallyattacked, and robbed."
"I wish you wouldn't be silly," Eve murmured. "I do hope I shan't seemself-conscious at the lunch."
"We haven't reached the lunch yet," Mr. Prohack replied. "We must go andbuy a safe first. There's no safe worth twopence in the house, and areally safe safe is essential. And I want it to be clearly understoodthat I shall keep the key of that safe. We aren't playing at necklacesnow. Life is earnest."
And when they had bought a safe and were once more in the car, he said,examining her impartially: "After all, at a distance of four feet itdoesn't look nearly so grand as the one that's lying at Scotland Yard--Igave thirty pounds for that one."
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