“Why not?”
Nick rubbed his eyes and stood, pacing to the window. “I was an unplanned child. My parents were forced to marry to give me legitimacy.”
Lila’s heart ached. She knew how it felt to know that your parents had conceived you by accident. But she’d also blossomed under the love of a mother who cherished her daughter and never allowed anyone to say that Lila was a mistake.
She walked over to Nick and slid her arm through his. She wanted to do so much more but didn’t trust herself. “I came into the world the same way. My parents never married, though.”
“Count yourself lucky. That kind of situation brings out the worst in people.”
She wasn’t sure what to say to that.
“I like you, Lila. You’re funny, smart and sexy as hell. I don’t want ever to wake up in the morning and see your face as my enemy.”
His sincerity made her ache. She cupped her hand around his jaw, meeting his blue gaze squarely. “We’re not our parents.”
“I know. But we’re already following in their footsteps.”
“We don’t have to.”
“I’m not sure where we go from here.”
Lila looked away. “We’ll pretend it was a one-time thing. We can’t make love again.”
Both eyebrows rose, but he said nothing.
“You’ll see. We’ll get back into our groove here at work. Everything will work out.”
“If you say so,” he muttered.
“I do,” she said and pivoted on her heel to leave.
“One more thing, Lila.”
“Yes?”
“Let me know as soon as you’ve found out.”
“I will.” She walked away feeling as if she’d gone ten rounds with a title-fighter. But this was for the best. No matter how many nights she’d dreamt of Nick, she knew that he wasn’t her reality man.
“Nick, do you have a minute?” Lila asked as Nick hung up the phone on a fruitless call to Grey Enterprises. He hadn’t been able to get any information from the sales rep he’d been talking to. Maybe dinner and drinks would loosen the man’s tongue.
Nick leaned back in his chair and glanced up at the woman responsible for making his life a living hell for the last two days. She treated him as a boss, and while he understood it was part of her plan, it wasn’t helping.
Her red-and-black suit would have done justice to a power-monger on Wall Street, but on Lila it looked less threatening. He knew that she prided herself on her professional image and wondered how much of that attitude had to do with her wanting their relationship back on a business-only level.
If anything, her behavior had sharpened the desire coursing through his veins. Watching her try to keep her distance made him want to bridge the gap. He had the urge to needle her out of her work mode and make her react to him as a man, not as her superior.
Work usually consumed all of his waking hours. But lately, at the oddest moments, the image of Lila, her weight braced on her elbows and her skirt around her hips, would enter his mind. He’d gotten an erection in a staff meeting yesterday afternoon. Never had any woman interfered with his job.
“What do you need?” he asked, to get his mind off her tempting curves.
She entered his office, moving with the subtle grace of a confident lady. “It’s about the annual charity event.”
Every year Colette, Inc. sponsored a bachelorette auction that featured the new fall and winter jewelry designs. Calling on single women from Colette’s many departments to be auctioned off for dates, they had the evening gowns donated from a local designer and then each woman wore a signature piece of jewelry that would be for sale during the Christmas season.
The money raised from the auction went to a local children’s home and the event was a big community satisfier for Colette. Nick had even bid on one of the bachelorettes last year.
“What about it?” he asked. The administrative staff each handled different aspects of the event.
“Is it still on? I’ve been getting a few calls about it. And it’s already October.”
“Nothing has changed at Colette. We want the public to see that we’re still strong. It’s definitely on.” The more Nick thought about, he knew they’d have to do an intensive marketing campaign in Youngsville and the surrounding areas. The community needed to believe that Colette wasn’t taking the Grey threat lying down.
“Good. I’ll get the ball rolling on the planning.”
She stood to leave his office, and he knew he couldn’t endure another day of pretending he’d never been more to her than the man who employed her. “Lila, would you like to join me for lunch?”
She tilted her head to the side. Her eyes said yes but from past experience he knew how carefully she weighed every decision she made. It still surprised him she’d made love to him that night in his office.
Unless she’d been thinking about it for a while. But he wasn’t going to ask her that. Then he’d sound like some dopey guy who’d never had incredible sex before. And he’d had plenty of incredible sex. Lots of it. But never as good as it had been with Lila.
“I don’t think that would be a good idea,” Lila said.
He knew he should let it go. Let her go. But he couldn’t. “Why not?”
She bit her lip and glanced over her shoulder at the open doorway leading to her desk. “I don’t want people getting the wrong idea about us, especially since we agreed our business relationship is what’s important.”
A blush flooded her face and neck. He wondered where it started. At her pert breasts? Or higher? Did the warmth flooding her skin also affect other more intimate parts of her body?
“You’re my secretary, no one would think there was anything else involved,” he said.
“I don’t know. You look at me sometimes in a way that’s just not…”
She was too perceptive, he thought. He did look at her like he didn’t know what to do with her. And he didn’t. She’d managed to get under his skin and he couldn’t decide how to get her out.
“We’ll talk about the auction.”
“I don’t think so. I don’t want to take a chance.”
“A chance on what?”
She said nothing. He hated her silences. Hated that he knew he wouldn’t be able to keep quiet because anger grew inside him. Hated that she was so calm and cool while he simmered with frustration.
“A chance that someone might think that we close the door sometimes late at night and make love on my desk?” he asked.
She glanced away. He knew he’d hurt her with his words, and he wanted to call them back. He was a bastard. He knew better than to talk to anyone when he felt this way. And it wasn’t as if the situation with Lila was her fault.
“Not sometimes,” she said, striding out of his office. She pulled his door toward her and before it closed, she said, “One time.”
Nick picked up the crystal paperweight he’d been given when he’d gotten his first promotion at Colette and heaved it at the wall. Then he grabbed his coat and left his office, not glancing once at the woman who’d caused a roar inside him that couldn’t be silenced with social niceties and childish games of do-overs.
He continued down the hall and took the stairs, fifteen damned flights of stairs outside to the fresh sunshine. Except that the darkness inside him threatened to black out the sunshine. His carefully controlled life had spun out of control and as it started to settle, none of the pieces fell where they belonged.
Four
Lila left her desk after Nick’s departure. She knew Nick wasn’t comfortable with their new relationship, but she was afraid to let her emotions get involved with Nick.
Suddenly she realized they already were. Even if she never touched him again, even if physically they lived in other parts of the world, he’d always be a part of her. If she never saw him again, he’d still haunt her dreams, not only as a phantom lover but as a man she cared about.
The sun shone brightly on this early October day. It was chilly
outside and her suit, though lined and long-sleeved, was no match for the wind. If she ever moved again it would be back to someplace warm. Hawaii warm.
She scanned the parking lot looking for his car and saw him striding toward the park across the street. She didn’t hesitate to follow him. But once he sat on a bench she was reluctant to approach. She had no idea what to say.
“Stop hovering, Maxwell.”
She sighed, lowering herself to the wooden bench. She glanced around to make sure no one saw her sitting with Nick, but the lunch crowd was light at the moment.
“Why’d you follow me?” he asked.
“I wanted to clear up a few things.” Darn, it was really cold by the lake. A stiff breeze ruffled her hair and she tried to tuck the escaping strands back into her chignon. She hugged her arms around her waist.
“Yes?”
“It’s not you I don’t want to be seen with.”
“Yeah, right,” he said.
“It’s just I have a solid reputation here. You’ve probably always had one, having grown up in an intact family. But for me, everyone always said, like mother, like daughter.”
“Are you like your mother?” he asked.
“Until two nights ago, no.”
“Our intimacy changed that?” He shrugged out of his suit jacket and then draped it over her shoulders. She huddled into it. Still warm from his body, it was like being enveloped in Nick. She wanted that again. Not just the passion but the cuddling they’d missed out on.
“Yes. Mom was always…”
“Your mom’s promiscuous?”
“No. She just doesn’t care what others think. She lives by her own rules.”
“Then what was the problem?”
“Honestly, Nick, look at me. I don’t know why but I don’t make friends easily.”
“I think you should take your mother’s attitude.”
“That’s easy for you to say. I’ve created a nice life for myself in Youngsville. People respect me and I’m a part of the community. I don’t want to lose that.”
He glanced away out over the lake. She wondered what he saw there. Wondered if it brought him peace of mind. She’d seen him at this bench a handful of times since she started working for him. It was where he cleared his mind.
She also knew that this bench was visible from all of the window offices. Subconsciously it seemed she’d made up her mind even if she didn’t want to admit it. She wasn’t going to let Nick slip away. She was going to have to face her fears. Was he worth the risk?
“I don’t think you’ll be ostracized for eating lunch with me.”
She stared into his electric-blue eyes and knew she could easily lose herself in them. “You want more than lunch, don’t you?”
“So do you,” he said softly. He was right, she did want more. More than he had offered her. She wondered if she could settle for halfway.
She didn’t say anything. His words went through her like a carnal kiss. Her pulse sped up and her breasts felt tight. A warmth penetrated her and forced her to admit the truth. An uncomfortable truth she hadn’t been prepared for.
“Listen, we’re under enough pressure at work with the takeover attempt. Why don’t we try again?”
Lila wanted to say yes without thinking but that would be a mistake. “I’m not looking for a red-hot affair.”
“That’s all I have to offer, Lila.”
“You have more, you just aren’t interested in the wholesome, all-American family with me.”
“No. I’ve just seen what marriage can do.”
“I know,” she said. “Face of the enemy and all that.”
“Don’t scoff. You’re more concerned with other’s opinions than you are with anything else.”
“Maybe we both need to change a little,” she admitted.
“I don’t know if I want to.”
“Our world is changing.”
“One date? We might decide we don’t like each other,” he cajoled.
“Do you have a nasty habit you’ve been hiding from me?”
“Probably more than one. Will you have dinner with me tomorrow?”
“I have tickets to the symphony. They’re doing an evening of Gershwin.” She’d never been to concerts, theatre or the ballet as a child. But her mother had made her watch a lot of “Great Performances” on PBS and every Sunday they’d listen to classical music or opera after church. It had given her an appreciation for different types of music that many of her peers didn’t have.
She loved that she could afford to hold season tickets to the symphony. Usually she invited Mrs. Tooney or Mrs. Appleton from the seniors’ center. They were always looking for something to do outside the center. Or she took one of her friends from Amber Court.
“I’ll take you to dinner first,” Nick said.
“A lot of people from Colette will be at the symphony,” she said.
“It’s your call.”
No guts, no glory, she thought. This was her chance to see if Nick Camden really was the man for her. “Yes, I’ll go.”
“Come on, let’s get back to the office before you freeze to death.”
Nick teased her all the way back to the building about the weather and her thin blood. The imprint of his hand on her lower back lingered long after he’d gone into his office and she’d called Meredith, her friend and co-worker, to talk about the details of the charity auction.
The next evening, Nick questioned his reasons for asking Lila out for a date. He knew nothing could come of it. Knew that he’d give anything for one full night in her bed. Knew that he wanted more with her than he’d had for a long time with anybody.
He’d made a reservation at Crystal’s for the evening. The posh restaurant with its fireplaces and French food was the perfect place for seduction. In fact, he’d taken many women there before. He hadn’t realized that until he’d exchanged looks with the maître d’. Pierre had seated him with many different women and it tainted the evening for Nick.
Lila seemed oblivious as she took her seat. They were close enough to the fire to feel its heat. Nick had never been nervous about a date before so at first he didn’t recognize the symptoms. He’d graduated from high school when he was sixteen and started college early. He’d wanted to escape his parents so badly that he put everything else on hold. So sweaty palms weren’t the norm for him.
Most of the women he’d dated had pursued him before he’d asked them out, so they’d eagerly accepted. Not Lila. She’d thought twice about the evening, had even doubled-checked with him before leaving the office to make sure he hadn’t changed his mind.
Her question had roused a tenderness in him that he was unfamiliar with. He hadn’t been able to shake it as he’d dressed and driven to her apartment. When she’d opened her apartment door, the tenderness had changed to lust. Not totally changed, as he would have liked, but lust was now the overriding emotion.
Dammit, it wasn’t fair that she looked like an angel and carnal sin at the same time. He didn’t know how to handle her. In fact, she was the only thing in his life that had thrown him for a loop in a long time. Even the takeover attempt which was rocking his world didn’t affect him the way Lila did. He knew he could find another job. Sure it would be a struggle, but so had his entire life. Lila offered a different view and he had no idea how to handle her.
Her sweater was pink and soft, hugging the curves of her breasts and making her skin glow. She wore pearl-gray trousers and tasseled loafers. It was the first time he’d seen her in something other than a business suit—or partially naked. These casual clothes showed him a glimpse of the woman Lila hid under her professional veneer. She had on an exquisite amber-and-precious-metal brooch. It was unusual for him not to recognize the designer. Having worked his way up in sales, he knew not only the “signatures” of the Colette designers but of most other designers in their field.
“Where’d you get that brooch?”
“Oh, Rose lent it to me.”
“Who’s Rose?”
/>
“My landlady. It’s so silly, but she said it always brought love to those who wore it.”
Hell. “Are you looking for love, Lila?”
“I’m not searching for it, but if I find it I’m not going to run away.”
“Well, I guess that piece is as good a talisman as any.”
“Don’t you believe in love, Nick?”
He shook his head. He wasn’t ready to get into a discussion on what he’d seen done in the name of love. He knew for a fact that it didn’t exist. Had never felt any great melting in his heart when he’d met his wife or thought of his deceased parents.
“I wonder who designed the piece?”
“I could ask Rose.”
“Don’t bother. I was just curious.”
The waiter arrived and they both ordered. The sommelier stopped by next.
“Would you like a glass of wine with dinner?”
Lila nodded. Nick selected a French burgundy. One of the benefits of traveling in Europe was that he’d learned the difference between a gallon of grocery bargain wine and the French and Californian vineyards.
An awkward silence fell between them. Lila straightened her silverware and then glanced up at him. She blushed when she caught him staring at her.
“The atmosphere at work is getting pretty hairy,” she said.
Nick grunted. The situation with Grey was getting worse. Rumors ran out of control like weeds in a garden and there was little the executive committee could do but smile and lie through their collective teeth. Nick usually felt calm at work. He knew the entire staff all worked hard and the company was solvent. This takeover attempt involved more than money, his gut said.
“What’s the word?” he asked her.
“Rumors of unfair business practices. I couldn’t run it down though. Even Paula in Human Resources was tight-lipped.”
“A miracle has occurred somewhere if Paula was tight-lipped.”
“No doubt. Maybe the second coming.”
Tonight, though, he wanted to put thoughts of Colette on hold and focus on Lila. On him and Lila—together.
Some Kind 0f Incredible (20 Amber Court Book 2) Page 4