by Lauren Wood
I wanted more out of the moments we spent together, but she had left town not long after that. You never really got to have that conversation. It was probably for the best, because I almost knew for sure that she didn't feel the same way that I did. There was no possible way. I was head over heels in love with her and to her, I was just some guy.
“Yeah, I remember Bonnie Harlow. What about her?”
“She was here, not but a little while ago, and she was signing her kids up to start school.”
“Kids?”
“Yeah, she had two of 'me. Both boys.”
“I don't know if I could see her as a mother.”
“You always saw Bonnie on a pedestal, but she was just a friend of mine.”
“You are the only one that could be around her and not act like an idiot. I think that's why you were her friend to begin with.”
“Bonnie is pretty, don't get me wrong, but she never was my type. She was a bit too shy for me. Although right now, I don't think that she's shy anymore. Something has changed.”
I wanted to know what he meant by that, but I didn't want to seem too eager for the information. It had taken me a long time to get over Bonnie. She had been my first and for many years, she was my only. Knowing that she was all of a sudden back in town, made me feel strange. What was the meaning of this?
“No, it seems like everybody is just finding their way back to Ridgewood. I never would have thought that I would come back here, but I'm glad that I did. Nowhere else has felt like home.”
“Well it's different for you, Steve. You went to the city and made your millions and came back. I don't think it's the same for her. She said something about checking at the hospital, to see if they have any openings.”
“So, she became a nurse?”
I remembered her always saying that she wanted to become a nurse. She wanted to help people, and I'd always thought that nursing was an honorable thing to do. I was happy to see that she was doing everything that she said she was going to.
“Looks like it. I think that she just got divorced, so it probably messed things up on that front. I didn't get to talk to her too much, and we couldn't say much of anything because she had her kids with her. I'm going to go over there this evening and find out what she's doing back here. I never thought that I would see the day that Bonnie Harlow would be back.”
I just kind of shook my head, because I didn't think I would see the day either. Bonnie had been the woman that I had dreamed about for years. How many years had it been since we graduated, eight or nine? I don't know exactly, but it had been a long time, and I didn't think I would ever see her again. It was funny, because out of all the women I dated in the city, she was one that I thought about the most. Bonnie took my virginity and then took my heart, when she left home.
Jesse showed me what questions he had, and I went back to the construction workers. I tried to keep my mind on the new wing of the school that I was helping to design, but it was not doing me any good.
My mind was filled with Bonnie Harlow. She was back now, and I was wondering how it was all going to turn out. Was I finally going to get the second chance with her that I knew was supposed to happen? Is this what drew me back to Ridgewood, Bonnie?
When I was leaving the school, I thought about how I was going to see her again. I didn’t want it to take too long. I needed one of those run-ins with her that seemed natural, but were completely fabricated.
I wanted to see what she looked like now. I didn't even have to ask Jesse about it though, because part of me just knew that she was going to be as beautiful as always. Bonnie was the type of woman that was hard to ignore. I couldn't see that changing. She had to be just as beautiful as before.
I could still see her long black hair in my mind. She also had these dark, soulful eyes that were almost black in color. I’d never met anyone else like her and even after all these years later, I still hadn't found anyone that made me feel the same way.
All Bonnie had to do back then was look at me, and I was lost in her presence. Even though I had made my millions and dated models, I had a feeling that it wasn't going to be any easier to be around Bonnie again.
Passing the hospital on the way home, I knew that I stretched out my neck just a little bit more. I was hoping that I would pass, and fate would just let me see her. Then I would be able to judge how I was going to go forward. I had to have everything planned when it came to Bonnie.
I wasn’t going to let her walk away again. Not this time.
4
Bonnie
The kids were off doing homework when Jesse came over. Phillip was done first and playing a video game, while Jesse and I made dinner. More of the time was spent gossiping about everyone from high school than anything else. He was getting me caught up and I have to say, a lot had been going on in Ridgewood. I don’t know why I was so entranced with it all, but I liked to hear how everyone was doing.
“So, whatever happened to that one guy? What was his name?”
“You're going to have to be a little bit more specific, Bonnie. There was a lot of guys in our class and they were all interested in you.”
“Well, he was somebody that I hooked up with, so maybe that would narrow it down. I was only with a couple of guys in high school.”
“And it was the one that you didn't date?”
“Yeah, what was his name?”
I could see the guy in my head when I closed my eyes. He had really left an impression on me, but I couldn't for the life of me remember his name. I had been a bit out of sorts at the party, and his name had just slipped my mind. Or I never knew it at all. Either one could have been just as viable of a realistic option.
“Hmm, I think you're talking about Steve.”
“Steven? Yeah, I guess that could have been it.”
“Funny thing. I just saw him a little while ago. He came in about an hour after you left. I didn’t know the two of you hooked up.”
“So, he works at the school too?”
“Yeah, but it’s only temporary. He's really doing us a favor more than anything else.”
I didn't get into any more details with Jesse. I wanted to, but Jake wanted me to see the homework that they were making him do.
“Do you see this? I don't even know what this is. This is way harder than our old school.”
“Good, because your old school had one of the lowest ratings in the county. This has one of the best. I'm sure it's going to take a little time to get used to it, but I know that you can do it, Jake.”
He gave me a dirty look that was fast becoming his only expression and then he gave one to Jesse as well.
“Sorry, Jesse. I apologize for his rudeness.” Jesse just waved me off like it was no big deal.
“I just got divorced too and I have a four-year-old daughter. She is not happy with me right now. I get more attitude than that every day of the week. I just roll with the punches. They have to show off their anger as well.”
“Yeah, Jake is definitely upset with me. I don't know how to change it though. We needed a change, and the housing market was so cheap here. It just seemed like a no-brainer to me. Not to mention that the family is here.”
“You made the best decision, and he will come around. I am glad you made it, if that helps.”
I wasn’t sure if it did. He had this gleam in his eyes that I’d never noticed before. I wondered if it had always been there.
“Did your daughter ever come around?”
Jesse smiled and shrugged. “Well, in some ways, but in others I think she is always going to be mad at me. She's a lot like her mother and Eva is going to take a while I fear.”
I hoped that he was right and Jake would come around eventually. Since Jesse had worked with kids all these years, I was hoping that he knew something that I didn't. He told me that I just needed to let it go and Jake would eventually get with the program. I didn't know if that was true or not, but I sure did like the idea of it.
Jesse stayed until about
eleven and he was going to drive home, but I told him to sleep on the couch. I didn't want him to drive after he’d been drinking.
“I have to get up early in the morning, honey.”
“I do too. I have an early shift. We all have to get up early, so it shouldn't be a problem.”
“Are you sure this is okay?”
“Yeah, as long as you don't have some crazy girlfriend that's going to come after me because of it.”
“I had a crazy wife, but that was a long time ago. No girlfriend now.”
He looked at me in a way that made me question things. I had never looked at Jesse that way and I didn't think he had looked at me that way before, but now he was and it was hard not to see. As much as I liked Jesse as a friend, it did not mean that I thought there would ever be anything between us.
I bid him a goodnight and I went into my bathroom after I gave him some extra blankets and pillows. He didn't object when I told him he could sleep on the couch. I don't know what I would have done if he came to my bedroom, but I still felt the same way about Jesse. He was a great guy and he was a great friend, but nothing else.
The one person that I did think about that evening when I was going to sleep was Steve. The shy guy from the party that had really done a number on me. I wonder what he was up to nowadays.
5
Steve
I found myself going to the school, more than was necessary for me to do. I was known to check up on the construction of one of my buildings, but this wasn’t just because of work. As much as I liked to claim that it was, I knew better. I was far more interested in running into an old flame that I heard might be there.
When about a week of this didn’t work, I decided that I was going to pull Jesse into it. I didn’t want him to know what my reasoning was for my interest in Bonnie, but I had to say something. It had been a long time since I’d seen her and knowing that she was in town and I still hadn’t seen her, was bothering me.
On Saturday, I was considering where I was going to pop up and find Bonnie. I was debating on going down to the hospital later, to visit a friend and see if I could run into the raven-haired nurse.
Then I saw her, like she had just popped up out of nowhere and I was sitting on the porch, hot coffee in hand. I took a drink, not remembering that it was scolding hot.
I cursed loudly when I burned the crap out of myself. There wasn’t much I could do about it. I tried to squelch the sound, but it was clear that she’d heard it. I wasn’t being too quiet, and our eyes met. I had to wonder; did she even remember me?
My chest was wet and red, as well as my chin and neck. I would have been mortified, if I wasn’t taking her in. Bonnie hadn’t changed all that much at all. She was still the vision that I’d dreamed about for countless nights. I could feel her looking at me from way over there and it affected me just the same.
“Steven?”
I sighed and kind of shook my head. Of course, she would recognize me at this moment, while I was covered in burns and coffee. I waved my hand and then said hello. She started to walk over, and I started to stiffen up. I wasn’t ready for Bonnie. I needed whiskey, not caffeine, to deal with a woman like her. That hadn’t changed a bit.
“It’s been a long time, Steven.”
“It’s been even longer since anyone has called me Steven.”
Damn she looked good. As she was walking over, I noticed the movement of her hips. She still had the seductive walk down. In just a few steps, I wanted her bad. Her hair was down, flowing over her shoulders and almost to her waist. I’d never seen her so unmade. She never used to go anywhere without her hair done up and makeup on. This way, she was even more stunning and she quite frankly, took my breath away.
“Steven always had a better sound to it than Steve.”
“Yeah, I remember you saying that.”
“Do you live here?”
I agreed and she just kind of shook her head. “I just moved in next door. What’s the odds?”
“Not too bad, considering this town is so small. The houses don’t go up for sell very often.”
I cringed inside, trying to figure out what I was blathering on about. I couldn’t talk in front of her before, and now I was going on about unrelated things.
“Yes, I suppose so. I knew that I would see old friends when I came back to Ridgewood, but I never imagined I would live next door to you.”
She came up on the porch and moved in to give me a hug. I stood up at the last minute and awkwardly picked her up practically, when I stood up. She held on and then giggled as she pulled away. “I see that you’re just as shy as ever.”
I wanted to tell her that it was only with her, but I didn’t think she would understand or believe me. I don’t know what it was about Bonnie, but she’d always been this way with me. She was the one woman that I wanted more than sense and the trembling in my hands was all the proof I needed.
Bonnie brushed her lips against mine, and I could have sworn that she was cheesing when she pulled back. I think she knew exactly what she did to me and enjoyed it, making me squirm.
“I wouldn't say shy, just surprised to see you.”
“You shouldn't be surprised. I feel like we were meant to run into each other Steven. Don't you feel it too?”
She always talked that way, like everything was lined up in some celestial fate. I don't know if I actually believed it, but I’d always liked the idea of it with her.
“I don't know about that Bonnie, but it sure is good to see you.”
Bonnie was smiling up at me, and I couldn’t help but smile back. She could believe whatever she wanted, as long as she kept looking at me like that. A feeling of ease came over me and I knew that it was because of Bonnie. She had this way about her, making a person feel like everything was going to be okay. Apparently, she still had that power and I was immediately sensing that the world would all somehow work out. I didn’t know how, but I didn’t have to.
“It's good to see you as well. I was just talking to Jesse the other day, and I was asking about you. I told him I hadn’t seen you in years and was curious how you had faired through the years.”
“You were?”
“Of course. I wanted to know how you were doing. It's not every day that you pop a guy’s cherry. Let's just say, I was curious how everything turned out. I guess I wanted to make sure that I’d done a good job.”
I chuckled for a moment and even though it was a bit embarrassing to be having this conversation with her, I knew it had to happen.
“I didn't know that you knew.”
“Even though you are a very quick learner and you had some real natural talent, it was pretty clear to me, Steven. Not that it was a bad thing though. I've always thought about you through the years and I think it was because of that. I’d never been someone’s first before.”
I wasn't quite sure what to think of her words. She was unwittingly boosting my ego with the fact that she had thought about all the same years I thought of her. I’d thought about her a lot, so it was nice to think that I wasn't the only one that was hoping for more.
“Well, I'm glad to know that I stuck with you for one reason or another.”
“Well that and I think you had one of the prettiest dicks I’d ever seen. That stuck with me as well.”
That compliment was completely out of left field and it made my face turn red. I don't think I had blushed much like this since the last time I saw her. Bonnie of course, brought it to my attention and then laughed about it.
“I have to go make breakfast. Come over and say hi. You don't know how good it is to see those red cheeks. It's been awhile Steven, and I can't believe that I can still make you blush like that.”
She was about halfway across the lawn, before she turned around and asked me if I wanted some breakfast.
“Right now?”
“No, give me about half an hour and come on over. I will have some coffee ready by then, but you have to put a shirt on. That is all too distracting for the breakf
ast table.”
I wiped my chest, and my skin was still a little red where the coffee had spilled. I never did well with conditions, but a shirt did seem in order on this occasion.
6
Bonnie
Walking back to the house, I’d invited him over and now I was questioning why I’d just done it. When I walked in the door, I closed it, before I leaned back and wondered what I’d just done. He was so damn sexy, shirt off and still had that shyness that I’d always found as a turn-on. Now he was just more thick, handsome, confident than I remembered and the reaction to him was much the same.
“Mom, what are you doing?”
“Not much, Jake. Just invited a neighbor over for breakfast. Waffles or omelets?”
He was looking at me strange, but as rude as he had been lately, I was getting used to that look from him. It was certainly getting old, though now I had a feeling that it was because of how I was acting. I was the one that was leaning against the door like I was going to not be able to stand up.
“Both?”
I sighed, but just agreed. I didn’t want to start an argument. He was already rowdy enough and my mind was on other things, things I said I was going to ignore for a while. It was hard to do, when such a fine specimen was next door.
“Good enough. Get your brother up and make your beds.”
He sulked off, but even his attitude couldn’t put me in a bad mood. It was only about a half an hour later when the doorbell was ringing and I hadn’t even changed, that I second-guessed my decision. What was I thinking? The kids were home and although I could and would play it off like I had Jesse, he was just a friend, it would be different with Steven because I didn’t feel the same for him as I did for Jesse.
I went to the door and Steven had a shirt on. I was almost saddened, even though it had been one of my conditions. I could still see it in my mind’s eye, and I had to pull myself together. This wasn’t helping anything.