by Lauren Wood
Something happened though, after I went to pick up the kids that weekend from Doug. He obviously had something on his mind, but he didn't say anything in front of the kids. He told me that he was going to call me later on that night.
I asked him what it was about. He just shook his head. Doug had always been a little overdramatic, so I tried not to worry too much.
“Not in front of them.”
It left me feeling strange though, because he didn't usually act this way. Doug had been acting extra strange lately, ever since I had Steven pick up the kids. I was still regretting that decision, though I don’t know how I could have done it any better.
It wasn’t the first time that Doug had warned me as of late, but this felt different somehow. He looked concerned and I had to stop myself from pestering the kids for information. I knew that they would tell me something if I asked, but I also knew that it was wrong to put them in that position, so I held my tongue.
I got home, and I had barely gotten them to bed before Douglas was calling me. His voice sounded tense, and I couldn't for the life of me figure out what was going on with him. He had always been a bit of a wild card and lately it had been worse than usual. I couldn’t take this right now, I really couldn’t.
“What's going on? You sounded weird earlier, when I came to pick up the kids.”
“We need to talk.”
There had not been a conversation I had ever, that started out that way and turned out to be a good one. I had to brace myself for whatever it was he was about to tell me. All I knew for certain, was it wasn’t going to be good, not with a set-up like that.
“Of course, Doug. What's up?”
“What is going on with you and your friend Steven?”
It really didn't take much for me to guess what this was about. The kids probably said a bit too much and now he was wondering if we were together. If he heard that Steven was staying with us, of course Doug was going to immediately think that he was now my lover or something like that. Considering the conversation that we had the last time that we talked without the kids around, I had a feeling that this was just his jealousy coming out again.
“What do you mean, Doug? Why do we keep talking about Steven?”
“Never mind that. You didn't tell me that you had moved him in. Don't you think it's a little fast? I mean, you just moved out there and now all of a sudden, you're living with some guy? With my kids?”
“Well they're my kids too, Doug, and I wouldn't bring them around anybody if I didn't think it was a good idea. You don't understand what is going on with me and Steven, and you’re just making yourself look silly. You’re getting all worked up for nothing.”
“Jake told me that he has been staying the night over there.”
“In the guest room.”
“Supposedly.”
“The truth is Doug, that we aren't together anymore, and you don't get the right to talk about who I am and who I’m not dating. I have told you before that I’m not going to let you dictate my life. You tried to do it when we were married, and I'm certainly not going to let you do it now. I finally got my freedom, and I’m not letting it go.”
“I'm not going to let you move men in with my children living there.”
“You don't really have much choice in this, Doug. I'm the one with custody, and I’ve done nothing wrong. It is okay for me to have a life. I am ready to move on, even if you're not.”
I hung up because I was mad, and when I saw Steven and he asked me about it, I told him that I didn't want to talk about it. I didn't want to tell him that he was the reason that I was arguing with my ex-husband. It would just make it more complicated and that was the last thing that I needed. It was already enough to leave my head spinning.
“Who was that?”
“Just Doug.”
“That didn't sound like a good conversation. Did something happen when he went to pick up the kids?”
He just said ‘the kids’. He didn't say my kids or Doug’s kids. He said the kids and for a moment, that threw me off, and I was a little melted inside because of it. Why did I feel so many of these emotions for him? I knew that they were misplaced or too soon or something.
“I don't really know what he's going on about now. I think one of the kids let it slip that you are staying here, and he is not very happy about it.”
“Does he want you back?”
I was about to answer him when Steven waved me off.
“You know what, you don't even have to tell me, because I already know the answer. Anyway, all exes are guaranteed to want you back.”
“Does that bother you? You know, I was married to him.”
“No not at all. I didn't even know that there was any drama.”
“He hasn't been very happy with me lately. Ever since you went to get the kids last time, because I had to go to work, he has been acting funny. He keeps talking about it going back to the way things were. I keep hoping that he will find somebody in the city and kind of move on a little bit. It would be a lot easier for everybody involved.”
I had to agree with that sentiment. “I don't want him as an enemy, but he kind of feels like one. I probably could be cool with him, if it wasn't for you. When you're added into the equation, suddenly I have all this competition.”
“It's nothing to worry about, really. I'm sure that Jesse will get on with it eventually. He is just having a hard time with the idea that I’m going to do it as well, just with someone else. Jesse has never been my type.”
“I think Jesse has been in love with you for about ten years. It isn't something that he's just going to get over eventually, Bonnie. Trust me, I’ve seen the way he looks when he thinks about you.”
“I never knew that about Jesse. We were just friends, and I thought that was all there was. I am learning I’ve been so wrong about a lot of things.”
“Women like you never know what it is that you do.”
I didn't like the way he said it. Like it was something that I was doing. Like I was drawing them in somehow and messing with their heads. Nothing that I was doing should have caused any man to act a certain way. That was on them, not me.
“Women like me?”
“Yeah, the beautiful ones that don't really realize how beautiful they are. They get everybody underneath their spell, and they don't even know that they're controlling them. You can’t help it.”
“That sounds hard. It sounds like crap, but hard.”
“Trust me, it isn't crap, Bonnie. It is exactly how I feel about you. I don't think you quite realize what kind of power you have over me or what I would do to have you and keep you.”
“It wasn’t my intention, Steven.”
“Of course not. Women like you wouldn’t do such a thing on purpose. That is what makes you so dangerous. You don't even know that you're doing it.”
I didn't know what to say to that. Steven seemed so sure of himself, and all I could do was go along with it. I certainly wasn't going to argue the point. I was already uncomfortable enough as it was.
22
Steven
Usually, Bonnie and I would stay up for a little while. We would watch a movie or something before the two of us would start making out. Things would escalate until we were either enjoying ourselves in the living room or taking it back into the bedroom. A couple of times we actually went out on the porch just because Bonnie could be quite loud when given the chance.
Tonight was a little different. It wasn't because Bonnie was acting differently, it was because of me. After speaking about Doug and then thinking about Jesse, it got me thinking. Both of them were two men that wanted the woman that I had. I had a feeling that one of them had something to do with what had happened to me. My attacker was unknown at the moment, but I had a feeling in my gut that it was going to be because of my love for Bonnie. It was the only thing that made sense.
Instead of kissing her like I usually would, I wanted to ask her questions about her ex-husband. I didn't think that Jesse co
uld do something quite so devious. But I did not know much of anything about Doug. Maybe he was the one I was supposed to be looking at. Maybe he was the one that had me attacked.
“So, what is he like?”
She looked at me a little puzzled for a moment and then asked me who I was talking about.
“Doug.”
Bonnie sighed, obviously frustrated at me. I didn’t know what to tell her. All I knew for certain was I had to know more about the men in her life. She had accused me of it being my crazy lifestyle in the city that brought this all down on my head, but it could just as easily be her and the men in her life.
“Yeah, he’s your ex-husband, and you told me that he wanted to get back with you. So, I wonder, what is he like.”
“Why do you ask?”
“I'm wondering if I should worry about him or not.”
“In what way?”
She didn't get it for a minute and I actually felt bad even saying anything. I didn't want to think that it was possible. It wasn't like she had done anything wrong. But I knew that she was going to be bothered if somehow, it was because of her.
“Well Bonnie, I was attacked not too long ago. I don't have any enemies, no matter what Jesse told you. I didn't come here to get away from anyone or anything. I just moved back home to get away. Someone did it though. Someone bad was obviously mad at me, and it makes me wonder if it has something to do with you.”
I realized immediately that I should have kept my mouth shut. She was not taking the information very well and Bonnie was already shaking her head, telling me that there was no way.
“Doug isn't like that. I know that he probably wasn't on his best behavior when you went to go get Jake and Phillip, but trust me when I tell you, that he's not like that. He isn’t capable of something like that.”
“He’s not like what?”
“You know, the type of person that would have another person jumped by guys in ski masks. I just can't see that happening. There's just no way.”
“Are you one hundred percent sure about that? You told me yourself, that he keeps bringing me up and acting differently. How sure are you that he couldn't do something like what was done to me?”
Bonnie still shook her head, but it wasn't as vigorous as before. She was wondering if he could do something like that. She really did have no idea.
“I am pretty sure, Steven. Doug has always been a bit of a hot-head, and I have seen him get into a couple of fights when we were married. It was usually because he got jealous, but this is different. He is the type of guy that would fight you one on one. I have never heard of him seeking someone else out to do the dirty work for him. He is the kind of guy that wants to do it himself.”
I don't know if that made me feel any better. She admitted that he had a temper, and that he got physical with people. Maybe he was the type of person to take care of it himself, but it might be hard to do because of the distance. Maybe he didn't have time to take the long drive, and it was easier to send somebody else to do it. There were millions of scenarios running in my head and they could have easily been one of many.
“I really don't want to argue with you about this, Steven. I'm telling you now, that it wasn't Doug. I’m sorry it happened, but I don’t think you’re focusing your attention in the right direction.”
She tried to sound sure of herself, but Bonnie wasn't that good of an actress. She did not know if he was involved. I think I would have known, just from her lack of the ability to hide her expression. But just because she was assured that he wouldn’t do something like that, didn’t mean there was proof behind it. It could very well be something that she just couldn't foresee happening. One way or another, I had to look into it myself. Bonnie was obviously not going to be any help.
Bonnie wanted to change the subject and to be honest, I did as well. I didn't want to argue with her about any of it. It was just easier to tell her that I was going to trust her judgment. I did to a point. There was just something that my gut was telling me, and that was that I was right. It wasn’t just a fluke, that I was attacked in the middle of day, right in front of my house. It had to be people from out of town, and I just had this sinking feeling that it all came back to Bonnie.
Even knowing that though, I knew that I would never want it to change. With all of her baggage, it didn’t dissuade me as I would have thought it would.
I told myself that I was going to let it go, but I knew that I wasn't. It wasn't just the fact that I was attacked and hospitalized. That was hard enough on my pride. But there were a lot of other problems involved that needed to be accounted for as well.
I didn't like the idea of her being with a man that could do such a thing. I wanted her to stay safe and if she was going to be blind to what they were capable of, I was going to have to prove to Bonnie what I already knew to be true. One of the men in her life was a monster. I just had to show her which one.
The next day when she went to work, I decided that I was going to take a trip into the city. I got enough information from Bonnie when we were talking to do what needed to be done. I knew that it wouldn't be hard to find Doug and without really thinking it through, I went to go find the man that I was sure had attacked me. Rather, had me attacked.
Doug made a bit of money, but not near as much as I did. He was some kind of businessman, and I didn't even care what kind of business he was in. The only thing I was worried about was getting down to the truth of it all and finding out why and how he had done what he had done. It wasn't even a question of if, but why.
When I finally found the address that I came up with doing the Internet search, I found an older secretary in front of his office, like a guard. Apparently, I had to go through her first.
“Can I help you, Sir?”
“I am here to see Doug Templeton.”
“Of course, do you have an appointment?”
I told her that I didn’t, but I also said that it wouldn't be very long. I was going to get in there to see him, no appointment needed, for what we had to talk about.
“We're old friends, and I just need to speak to him for just a moment. Do you think that there would be a way for you to slide me in for just a moment? I am sure that he won’t mind.”
The assistant was an older woman, and it didn't take but a little bit of charm and a smile for her to go along with it. I was thankful for that. It was better to cause a scene inside of the office, not outside.
“Since you’re friends, I'm sure that it'll be fine. He's right in there.”
I thanked her for her help and quickly went to meet an enemy that I'd never met before. I wasn’t sure how I was going to prove it, but if I could get him to react and lose his cool, then Bonnie would see it for what it was. He was just trying to make it harder on us. It had to be him.
“What the hell are you doing here?!”
I closed the door behind me and ignored the sound I heard from the assistant. She was probably going to get into trouble when I left, and I made a mental note to apologize to her on my way out. That wasn't my intention at all.
“Me and you have to have a discussion, Doug.”
“Oh I don’t think we do. Get the hell out of my office. I have nothing to say to you.”
“I am not going anywhere until you admit what you did.”
23
Bonnie
“Please tell me that the call I just got from Doug is pure crap.”
“I think we both know that I can’t tell you that, Bonnie.”
“I just want to know what you were thinking. Why would you go over there and get into it with him?”
“I wanted to talk to him. I have a feeling that Doug had something to do with the attack and I wanted to get proof. You're not going to believe me until I get proof that he did it. I just know that he was involved.”
“How could you possibly know anything like that? You have only met him one other time before this. How can you be so sure that he was the one that had you attacked?”
“I do
n’t know how, just that he did.”
I couldn't believe this. When Doug called me earlier, I didn't want to talk to him because I thought it was going to be more of the same. He was going to tell me that he loved me and that he missed me and how we were supposed to be together and all that nonsense. That's what I had prepared myself for, but then he had started in on another direction. He was talking about Steven and how he knew that we were together. Also that my boyfriend had gone to his office and showed his ass, basically.
“You have no idea what really happened, and you are just trying to blame it on somebody. Why don't you let the cops do their job?”
He scoffed at me and told me that he had too much money to sit there and worry about a bunch of government officials doing the hard work.
“I'm going to find out who it is, and I'm going to take care of this myself.”
“Well, just know that I can't be with you when you're doing it.”
There was no way that I could bring all this drama in my children's life. Whether he liked Doug or not. Whether he thought that Doug had something to do with him being attacked, this was no way to handle it. Doug was my children's father, and unless there was some proof that he had done something wrong, I had to give him the benefit of the doubt. It wasn't really for Doug, but more for the kids.
“So, what are you saying, Bonnie?”
“I'm saying, that you can't go to my ex-husband’s place of work and start yelling at him. I even heard that you threw some things in his office. Is that true?”
I knew that enough of what Doug said was true just by the guilt on Steven’s face. For one reason or another, Steven had gone over there and completely flipped out. I don't know why he was so sure that Doug had something to do with it, but it was obvious that he was quite sure of that tidbit of information.