But what was I going to do with a baby? We were supposed to go off into the sunset and be hitmen together, to carry on working for the Bratva as a unified pair. There wasn't room in that for playing house.
I couldn't stay in the country after my stunt with the mopeds firmly put me in the frame for involvement with Sutherland's disappearance. And Maxim would have never wanted that anyway. He'd already told me he went wherever he was needed, at the drop of a hat.
With his baby in me, I couldn't be the woman he wanted. But his child was something I hadn't realised I'd needed so badly until just now. I sniffed hard, trying to pull myself together, trying not to beat myself up for being so stupid.
"Can you bring me a test?"
"Of course I can. You stay there. Give me the address, I'll come and find you."
*****
Good to her word, Cassie turned up on the doorstep less than forty minutes later, clutching a white paper bag with a green cross on the outside of it.
She looked around with undisguised awe as she stepped into the hall. "This place is alright, isn't it? Who robbed what bank?"
I shrugged a little awkwardly. "I don't think it was a bank."
"Christ, Elizabeth. Who is this guy?"
"You don't want to know, Cass. He's very good to me, that's all that matters."
Her lips pinched together, thin, and she didn't look altogether convinced. "You're calling me in tears because you think he's knocked you up."
I shook my head. "It's not like that. I love him. He loves me. I just - I don't think a baby was in the plans. Not yet."
She let out another heavy sigh. "You don't have to keep it."
I shook my head. "Yes I do. It's ours. And I want that so much. I just… don't know how to make it work."
Cassie's eyes softened and she handed the bag over to me. "If you have to, you'll find a way. You're good at doing that." Suddenly the last thing in the world I needed to do was pee. "Go on then."
"Right."
"I'll tell you something, whoever's making these things isn't hurting for cash."
I grimaced. "I'll pay you back."
Cassie shook her head. "Pfft. You just try it."
The instructions on the packet seemed overly complicated and I read them all twice over with my knickers around my ankles, then tore into the plasticated foil of the packet and uncapped the lid on the flat, plastic thing that looked vaguely like a marker pen gone wrong.
I managed to avoid peeing all over myself, which was pretty good given how much my hands had started to shake, and then I sat and watched the small window in disbelief as a strong pink line developed, getting darker and darker by the second, right next to the first line.
"Oh my God, I'm having a baby."
Cassie's face was a carefully neutral when I came out of the bathroom again, and held the stick out to her. But her smile welled in brightly, as soon as I let out a laugh, my grin taking over.
How could this have been anything else, when I'd felt like I'd been walking on air for weeks?
"I'm having a baby, Cassie."
"Oh sweetheart, yes you are."
"Maxim's going to be a daddy."
Now all I needed to figure out was how to tell him that all the plans we'd been making had to change. I had to hope it wouldn't bring everything crashing down. For all he said he wanted me, his whole life revolved around the Bratva. Before I came along, he hadn't had room in his life for anyone else. In me he saw a partner, and I wanted to be one to him. I wanted to be there with him through every job he was sent on.
I didn't want to bring up a child from hotel room to hotel room, safe house to safe house, surrounded by weapons and violence. But I didn't want to give Maxim up either.
It was wonderful news, I just hoped he'd see it that way too. I didn't think I'd be able to take losing everything if it wasn't what he wanted.
I took Cassie's hand and she must have seen the worry in my eyes because she squeezed my hand in hers. "Don't tell anyone yet, will you Cassie? I want to be the one to let Maxim know."
"Of course. I wouldn't do that. Your secret is safe with me."
CHAPTER 36
Maxim
One minute everything was fine. We were hand in hand in Kensington Gardens, enjoying the downtime before the next job came in, walking past the statue of Peter Pan and the rose gardens like a million other couples in love. The next, I spotted the two goons who'd been hanging around outside the Knightsbridge apartment, and I realised it wasn't just me being paranoid.
They'd followed us in, past the Diana Memorial Park, and they'd come all the way here, skirting around in front of us. My instincts were prickling and I had a primal need to protect Elizabeth bubbling up in me.
I slipped my arm around her waist and changed direction, walking faster as I turned her along a different path, away from them before they saw her. The last thing I planned on doing was letting the FSB do an unnecessary clean up.
I had my mobile out in a fraction of a second. I didn't care what time it was in Russia, Valentin needed to sort this out immediately.
"Maxim, what's going on? I thought we were going to walk to Speaker's Corner?" Elizabeth asked.
"Change of plan. I'll explain later, luv. We need to leave the park now."
The phone was still ringing, and when the call finally connected, I didn't give Valentin time to draw breath.
"Listen Valentin, I have two fucking FSB officers doing a piss poor job of following me. You're going to want to speak to whoever owns the bulldogs and call them off before they do something stupid."
"What?" Valentin at least sounded passably outraged. That was something. If only a professional courtesy. "Maxim calm down. I didn't know anything about that."
We'd been friends for a long while, but there was a chance I'd gotten him wrong. This could be a retirement present he'd arranged for me. After all, I knew about every single hit the Bratva had arranged. That was some dangerous information to have if I wasn't on the payroll any longer. Maybe Valentin was more ruthless than I'd given him credit for.
"That's all well and good mate, but if one of them tries anything with Elizabeth, I'm going to have a problem. Do you hear me? And then it's going to be your problem, because you're going to be the one who has to explain to the President why their entrails are scattered all over Kensington fucking Gardens, do I make myself clear?"
"Maxim. Calm down."
"Do not tell me to fucking calm down. You need to bloody tell them she's not a threat. You need to do it now Valentin, or I swear to God, you're going to regret it."
I thought he had a code, but that was before we had two Russian agents trailing us around London. Threatening the woman who meant everything to me.
"This ends today, Valentin. I mean it."
Elizabeth's eyes had gotten rounder and rounder with every word I said and her grip on my arm tightened as she glanced over her shoulder.
I snapped the call with Valentin off abruptly. "Don't look at them. Keep walking. We're fine. They're not going to get anywhere near us."
"Maxim, they've both got guns."
"And there is no way they have authorisation to open fire in a public space in a country where they don't have jurisdiction. Especially not on a British subject."
I met her eyes and she nodded just before we set off at a faster pace, jogging rather than walking.
"Just up here, we get to the Italian Gardens. We make a sprint for it, and we're away to Lancaster Gate. "
I didn't know if it was going to work. Running away had never been my style, but this wasn't that this was evasion. As soon as Elizabeth was out of harm's way, I'd come back and finish the pair of them.
But Elizabeth let out a gasp, doubled over and when I looked back she was breathing hard and her face was flushed and pale.
"Maxim." She grimaced, double over and clutching her belly. "Oh God." This wasn't the Elizabeth I knew.
Seeing her in pain was the worst thing in the world. I didn't care what caused it and
I didn't stop to find out. Without a moment's pause, I scooped her up into my arms and headed straight to Lancaster Gate tube station, running as fast as I could.
I powered down the steps, setting her down just before the barrier and one stern look at the station guard was enough for him to swipe the gate open for us.
"Wise choice." I wouldn't have argued with me either.
I pushed through the tourists, to the far end of the platform, holding Elizabeth to my chest. The weekend was almost as crowded as the middle of rush hour on some lines, and the Central Line in summer was the worst of them all. If only because of the thick, hot, dirty air that shunted through the tunnels in front of every train, heated up by the engines, with no opportunity to cool.
Sweat was glistening on Elizabeth's top lip and three people got up to give her a seat when I glared down the length of the train.
Elizabeth slumped down, and I crouched in front of her, steadying myself with the metal pole at the end of the row.
"What's going on? Are you okay?"
She shook her head. "I'm fine."
I didn't believe it. There was fear in her eyes.
"Elizabeth. Do you need a doctor?"
She shook her head, but her eyes had turned wide and glassy and her hand darted up to cover over her mouth. "I think it's the baby."
"The baby?" I echoed her dumbly, blindsided by a rush of emotions. Sheer, utter joy. I was going to be a father? Abject fear. There was something wrong. "Jesus Elizabeth why didn't you say something?"
She sniffed hard, shaking her head. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I thought - I didn't know if you wanted-"
I growled, cupping the back of her head roughly and pulling her in for a possessive kiss, my fingers tangled into her short hair. "I do. I always will."
She let out a sob, burying her head against my shoulder wrapping me up in her arms. "Oh God, Max. What if they're something wrong?"
That was a possibility I couldn't think about.
When the next station came, I hoisted her up like she was the most precious parcel in the word and carried her off the train.
"Come on. We need to get you home. And then I'm calling the doctor."
"But Max, I can't risk-"
"Our doctor, Liz. She's not going to give you away to anybody. I promise. We need to get our baby happy again, don't we?"
Elizabeth
Back in Knightsbridge, I almost wished we were in the little flat in Greenwich, when Maxim forcibly bundled me into bed and wouldn't let me so much as make a cup of tea myself.
The company doctor visited and she looked a little surprised to find she was dealing with potential pregnancy complications rather than some kind of wound stitching, which one glance into her medical bag told me she'd come prepared for.
She told me she was called Dr Petrova and started to examine me all the same.
"How are you feeling, Elizabeth? Any pains?" she asked as she pumped up the cuff to test my blood pressure.
I shook my head. "No." Since we got in, they'd subsided and I felt a little foolish now that there were two people fussing over me.
"Any bleeding?"
"No. I just felt like I was going to pass out."
She nodded, and I was glad to see that the frown than had taken over her face had eased. "We can do a blood test, just to make sure. And I can get an ultrasound machine up here so we can have a look and double check what's going on, but I think both you and thebaby are fine."
"Really?"
"Really."
In the doorway of the bedroom, I saw Maxim sag visibly. "Thank God."
When he closed the door behind Dr Petrova, he came back into the bedroom and sat down, and took my hand in his large palms, stroking over the stone of my engagement ring like he was trying to wear the shine off it.
"Let's get married."
"I already said yes, Max, remember? You don't have to ask me again."
"No, I mean, let's go to the register office and make it legal."
"What? Why?"
He smoothed his hand over my belly, lingering there before he made a grab for my hip and pulled me down the bed enough that he could close his mouth possessively over mine.
"Because you have our child inside you. And you need to be my wife right now. We can't do this any longer. Run around with people shooting. Not when we have a family. I have to find another way. And I need to know you're with me."
I swallowed hard, trying to stem the sting of tears that were threatening to creep into my eyes. I'd been so worried about the life that I knew was growing inside me, and what it would mean for our future together. I'd thought that Max hadn't wanted the kind of life that involved settling down, but I was so, so wrong.
"I'm with you Maxim. I'm always with you." I couldn't believe the sacrifices he was making, all for me. Without the Bratva, St Petersburg wasn't an option. We'd be walking away from all the perks the company gave him and I couldn't stay in London, even under my new name. My face was too recognisable for me to hide in plain sight.
But Maxim didn't seem to care about any of that.
"Good. Then I will go and sort our government friends out. And then we will have to plan how the rest of our lives are going to go. Together."
CHAPTER 37
Elizabeth
I could only imagine how much string pulling it must have taken to get the Kensington and Chelsea Registrar Office, at the Chelsea Town hall, with its columns and sweeping steps at any kind of short notice. I knew the place was booked out for months and months, if you didn't have the right connections.
But Maxim managed it.
A few days after our encounter with the FSB in the park and my scare over the baby, he announced he couldn't wait any longer to marry me.
At first I thought he was reacting to the baby - doing the right thing - but then I heard him on the phone to his contacts, putting pressure on like getting the most beautiful civil venue in London for our wedding held the same importance to him as the reason he'd found me in the first place. This wasn't duty. He wanted our wedding day to be as close to perfection as it could be.
"They say we can have it out of hours," he grumbled, hanging up the phone with irritation rising off him like steam and I stepped in closer to him, curling my arms around his chest.
"That sounds perfect."
I didn't care that it was out of hours. That the columned facade of the building would be all lit up, and the curved steps down from it would lead out onto the deserted Kings Road, which was far better than colliding with a bunch of shoppers who'd just come out of Peter Jones.
I loved the bustle of London, but having it to ourselves at a time when the city was sleepy made it all the more special, unique.
"We can fill the place with candles."
Maxim's scowl softened. "That sounds alright. No one else is going to say their vows by candle light."
Maybe it wasn't the wedding I might have dreamed of growing up, but I'd put away so many fantasies that I would never have. This was everything I wanted as a woman who hadno longer believed in fairy tales. It was going to get my happy ending, and I couldn't wait for it to be real.
"As long as I have flowers, and a beautiful dress, and Cassie and Mitch there, then I don't need anything else. All I want is to be your wife."
"All I want is to be your husband."
I smiled at him. "Then let's get married, Maxim. What are we waiting for?"
Maxim
Cassie helped me deck the entire building out with flowers. Lilies and roses in deep, dark colors that suited Elizabeth far more than the pastel and white shades the florists tried to offer. She was as pure as snow when I'd met her, but she'd lived through too much to ever be called delicate again, and I loved her steely strength. This day, this evening, was something I put my heart into, because it wasn't just Elizabeth I was making mine, this was about our child always having a family too.
I made sure we had a photographer, because I wanted to remember every moment, right from when she got out o
f the black cab, holding her bouquet and climbed the steps to come inside and meet me.
She was beaming ear to ear, looking perfect and stylish and far, far too trendy for me in a little fifties style dress that nipped in with a broad belt at the waist and hugged her hips, shoulders bare like some kind of film star. Lipstick red to match her shoes. A little hat instead of a veil.
She looked like a million dollars and change. I was the luckiest man alive.
Next to her, Cassie had on dress pants and a silky blouse and even Mitch had squeezed himself into a suit and tie.
The registrar explained all the legals bits and asked us questions ahead of funneling our small party into the ceremony room. We read out legal vows from a piece of paper. No one mentioned that it was odd Elizabeth already had my surname.
Maybe it should have meant less than it did, being a civil ceremony in the town hall, but those vows were like a magical spell, and they had power running right through them.
When I said I'd have her and hold her, in sickness and health until death do us part, I felt the gravity of it all go right through me. Grounding me, binding us together. Elizabeth welled up, pretty dark eyes glinting up at me.
"Christ, Love, don't cry."
She sniffed hard, wiping her tears away and shook her head, laughing at herself. "I'm just so happy."
"Me too."
We said I do, and Cassie let out a shout and there was a cloud of rose petals showering down.
Somehow we were jogging down the steps, wrapped up in each other's arms, ducking for cover under an umbrella Mitch held out because the heavens had decided to open.
Elizabeth stopped right there in the middle of the Kings Road and kissed me, long and deep until I pulled her hard up against me, hands at the small of her back, wanting to pull her so close there was no distance between us at all.
British Bratva Page 23