If Nancy Dow knew anything about the missing heiress, it must be between the pages of her diary. Was this what James was trying to find, Katie wondered? It must have been in the pocket of the dress and he hadn't noticed it. She looked at the dress again, and realized that it looked very much like the one Lady Katherine Gail Winslow had worn in that portrait. If that was so, how did Nancy end up with the dress? Of course, Maggie had said they were friends. Maybe Katherine gave Nancy some of her old clothes. Katie was eager to discover what was in the diary. After all, her mother had seldom spoken of her past and now Katie had a chance to learn more about her mother's life.
She left the tumbled mess in the attic, and with the book in her hand, went back downstairs, where the light was better. Katie went to her mother's room where there was less clutter and sat down in her mother's rocker in front of the window and opened the diary, as she tried to hold back her excitement.
The first page was dated back some twenty years or so before:
Katherine wants me to come to Winslow Hall and be her personal maid. That is very sweet of her. I'm so glad that she could marry Lord Winslow. James has returned to Emerson Manor. He was not here to see his sister get married, but he tells me he is going to stay for a while now, and I cannot beare to be parted from him again. He has tried to kiss me several times. I will not let him until I know if he loves me or not.
Some pages were blank and others were filled mostly with her dreams of marrying James, or an account of a grand party held at Emerson Manor. Then there was another entry that pertained to Katherine Winslow.
Katherine is with child! It is so exciting! If only I were married and could have a child of my own, but James has left again on a trip. He takes them often now and I wonder where it is that he is going, but I cannot ask. He would think it too forward of me. Each time he returns it is worse. He seems so preoccupied. He pays very little attention to me, anymore. I cannot take this any longer. He tells me he loves me, yet will not ask for my hand. He wants me to bed with him, but I will not unless we are married
.There was a few blank pages and then another entry.
I have left Emerson Manor. I love James so much, but he has not proposed marriage and I cannot be around him knowing he cares so little for me.
I am in Windy Gates now and have taken a meager position in a small dress shop here. I have informed Katherine of my residents and have begged her to write to me often. If only James would miss me and come after me. I have little hope he ever will.
Katie read on through the book, picking out entries that mentioned Lady Winslow, and James, trying to fit the story together by remembering some of the things Maggie had told her.
Something terrible has happened! Katie read, Katherine's husband has been killed in a hunting accident. Poor Katherine! She tells me she almost lost her baby because of the shock, but says she is better now.
And a few pages further: Katherine has had her baby . She is a beautiful little girl, her mother says. She named her Katherine Gail after herself, but she calls her Kathy. I wish I could see the new baby. Perhaps I shall visit Katherine someday soon.
Then there were not many entries except for a few places where Nancy talked of missing James. She seemed to have lost all hope of ever seeing him again, for she mentioned he never came to visit her.
Then she wrote: Charles has come back from his travels. Katherine has always liked him, and he has been courting her. I have a feeling that there will be wedding bells again for Katherine. If they could only be for me and James!
Katherine married Lord Yarnell this morning. I went to the wedding but I stayed in the back where no one would notice me, especially James. I hope Katherine will be happy.
I have not written for quite some time. Katherine has had another baby. It is another little girl, and they call her Alain. She is having a family portrait painted of her and the two girls. It seems as though I must constantly live in the shadows of others for very little ever happens to me here in Windy Gates. I am very lonely here.
Katie thought it strange that her mother should tell of all the things that Katherine was doing and the birth of her children, but never mention the illegitimate child of her own. Could it be that she was even too ashamed to put it on paper?
She read on to discover the answers to her questions.
I feel sad for Katherine. Charles treats her horribly. She has written me of how he hated her and often beats her! He is gambling her money away, and drinking heavily. She tells me she has seen Lord Emerson to ask if he could help her keep Charles from squandering her money so.
Something interesting Katherine told me. She and Lord Emerson have betrothed Alden and little Kathy. They have been such good friends and realize they should have married one another when Lord Emerson lost his wife and Lawrence died soon after. Now that they have seen their folly there is nothing they can do about it but plan for their children's future.
I cannot believe it, Katherine thinks that Charles is trying to kill little Kathy! She wants to hide her away somewhere, and has asked me to keep her here with me at Windy Gates. James and I will be the only ones who know besides Lord Emerson, and he only knows that Katherine is sending little Kathy away.
She says she will support me if I will keep her daughter safe for her until the danger is past. I am to keep her until Katherine sends word that all is safe. At last something exciting is coming into my life!
Then it was not James who took little Kathy, but Nancy! Katie froze in her chair. Then that meant that she must be Kathy! This could not be true. If she was Kathy, then...then, who was Katie? Was she truly the missing heiress herself? If she was really Katherine Gail, then James was not her father after all. He really was her uncle as Nancy had told her he was, and her father really was dead, just as Nancy had said. But that...that meant that Nancy was not her mother after all.
Nancy had told Katie on her death bed that she had not been honest with her, and to look for clues. Katie thought she was talking about the secret box, but it was really her own heritage she was supposed to find, Katie thought to herself. The secret box must have something to do with all this too. She said it held the key that opened the door to wealth and security. Was Katie supposed to find something that would prove who she really was? Was it in the secret box somewhere? Only she had never been able to find the secret box!
Katie hoped the rest of the answers would be in Nancy's diary. The Diary alone was enough proof to show that Katie was the real heiress. James had written to Nancy telling her about his own daughter, so it wouldn’t be hard to prove that the woman claiming to be the missing heiress was actually the daughter of James Langdon.
James knew all the details of the story and only had to change a few facts to make it conceivable that he had taken Kathy away instead of Nancy Dow. Where had he gotten the jewels, Katie wondered?
The pieces began falling into place for Katie. That was why her life had been in danger. James Langdon must have known who she was from the very start. That was why he didn't want her to return to Windy Gates, in case she learned the truth about herself. He knew she was not his illegitimate daughter. He had never been able to get that close to Nancy. However, he must have been relieved when he discovered she thought she was his daughter, instead of his niece.
Katie suddenly sat still. Then why did Alain claim she heard him talking about her? He never would have said those things that Alain claimed he did, if he really knew who Katie was. What part did Alain play in all of this?
Well, it made no difference, Katie decided. She now had the real proof that she was in truth the heiress of Winslow Hall. If Katie was the real heiress, and Nancy was to safeguard her until there was no more danger, then why didn't Nancy take Katie back when Charles had died, after killing her mother? The two of them could have lived a leisurely life long ago instead of slaving away in a dress shop.
Katie looked down at the diary, hoping the answer would be reviled along with all the other things Katie was learning.
"Katie is a darling. I call her that instead of Kathy, in case someone may hear about her somehow. It is almost like having my own child. I received a letter from Katherine today. She is worried that Charles suspects she had hidden Kathy away although she has tried to make everyone believe that Kathy was stolen or got lost somehow. She has even put up a reward to anyone who knows where her daughter is, to make it seem more authentic, but still Charles suspects her. She tells me to be very careful and keep an eye out for strangers who asks too many questions, or for Charles himself. It almost makes me glad that it still is not safe to take Katie back, she is such an angle, and I will hate parting with her.
Katherine has purchased the dress shop where I work. She has given it to me so I will have a means of supporting Kathy. That way she does not have to risk contacting me or sending me money. Even though she writes me, I don't think anyone suspects us because we have always written often.
James came by. He told me terrible news. He said both Katherine and Charles were dead! He was in a terrible state. He said it was his fault that his sister was dead. He told me Charles had bribed him with Katherine's jewels, and he told Charles that Kathy was hidden away.
That must have been how he got the emeralds, Katie thought.
Charles was furious and swore he would kill Katherine for deceiving him so. When James heard that the two had died in strange and fatal accidents, he was so frightened that he fled. James told me the old nurse ranted on that Charles had murdered his wife, but since the husband was already dead, they put it in the records as accidental deaths.
He told me that Charles’ brother, Justin, would be Alain's guardian, and it may not be safe to return the girl until she was grown. He asked me how I would be able to prove she was the heiress later, after the girl was older. I told him I have been keeping a record of events and would continue to do so. Also I told him Katherine had given me the Crest broach that Kathy had worn in the portrait and that would be the enough to prove her true identity. Besides, I have all of Katherine's letters.
I tried to persuade James to stay with me here at Windy Gates, but he would have none of me. I have been fooling myself all this time thinking that he may have loved me.
I am truly sorry that Katherine is dead. I shall miss her letters and her friendship. Even so, good has come of it. I can keep Katie till she is grown. I do not plan to tell her who she really is. She has already started to call me mummy and it would be too difficult to explain it all to her. When the time comes I will let her know."
Katie thought to herself, The time must not have ever come. Nancy had put it off too long. If she had not tried to look for Uncle James, she may have never found out the truth, unless she happened to find the diary.
It was hard to believe that James would try and kill her though. He had told Nancy to keep her safe, until she was older. She remembered how he had offered to put her up. Had he felt bad for having taken what was rightfully Katie’s and decided to make amends by sharing some of it? Katie turned her attention back to the book. There were still questions that needed answers.
Where were Katherine's letters? She had not seen them with the letters scattered in the attic. Had James found them, and taken them when he ransacked her home? Where was the broach, and what did the secret box have to do with anything?
Then it dawned on Katie. That was the key! The broach was the key that would open the door to wealth and security! The broach must be in the secret box! If she could only find the box! She tried to remember the things her mother had said about the clues. She said the clues were all around her. That must mean that the box was close at hand and if she could figure out the clues in the poem her mother taught her, maybe she would know where the box was. Had James already found the box? Katie felt he couldn't have, since she had been looking for it most of her life while she lived in the cottage. If she couldn't find it in that length of time, how could James find it in one day of searching? Besides, he didn't know that there was a secret box.
The answer to the clue might be in the diary itself. She continued to read.
I received a letter from James today. He is married. All this time he has been married. He even has a child, and to think, I practically begged him to marry me. Why didn't he tell me? He could see how I felt. I think of all the times he tried to kiss me. I am glad I never gave in like he wanted me to. Now I know why he took all those trips. He must have been going to see his wife.
I am glad I do not have to take Katie back right away. She is all I have in the world now. The dress shop is doing well and I love having her around. I feel bad that she does not have anyone to play with, but I fear that someone will discover who she is and try to collect the reward. I have to keep her safe and away from any danger. It is safe here in Windy Gates. No one from Emerson Manor or Winslow Hall ever come this way.
It is better that I raise her, rather than that old nurse maid Maggie. Having all that money would spoil her anyway. She is such a sweet loving girl, I want her to remain so. I am sure by now, she thinks I am her mummy. She never talks about "Megs" or her mother anymore. I hope she can forget all of that until she is older and can claim what is hers.
Katherine gave me a trunk of her old clothes for me to ware when Katie first came to me, so Katie would feel I was familiar to her. I have packed them away for her to see when she grows up. She brought her music box with her. Katherine said that she gave both Katie and Alain music boxes that play the same melody. She told Kathy to listen to it often and think of her, and they would soon be together again. Katie loves that music box. She tells me it makes her think of her mummy. I don't know whether she means me or Katherine. I am afraid to ask. She has come to call it her secret box because I have made up a game for her to play about a secret box. There are clues she must look for. I hope she is able to find them. I can hear her playing the music box now. It plays such a grand sweet song.
Katie remembered the night she had heard Alain's music box. It had been their mother who had given the box to her, not Nancy. She had always thought of her mother when she played it, but thinking Nancy was her mother, she thought of her. And Maggie! She thought now she did remember her. When she was making the daisy chain, it was Maggie's face she saw, showing her how to fashion one, not Nancy's. No wonder she took a sudden liking to the old lady.
Suddenly Katie remembered other things. The accidents! When Katherine said she couldn't remember anything about them, she started to remember her own accidents as a child. They were the very accidents that had happened to the small heiress that she once was!
The rest of the pages looked empty, but all that Katie had read, seemed to explain everything. Katie let the book drop to her lap, and as it did so, it fell open to yet one more written page, close to the back. The handwriting had altered quite a bit. Now the lines were thin and shaky. Katie read:
I have climbed these stars with my old bones to write one last time in this book. I am doing it for you, Katie. I know, or hope that someday you will find it here. I hope you can forgive me for loving you too much to ever let you go. Every year I have vowed to tell you the truth about your past, but I can never bring myself to do so. It is probably safe for you by now, but I don't think I could live the sort of life that you would have if we returned to Winslow Hall. I am too old to leave Windy Gates now. We have had so many happy years here, I could not bear staying here alone and remembering them without you here either. I do not have the heart to tell you that I am not truly your mother.
I am old and dying now and so will have to part with you soon anyway. I've tried to give you clues to discover who you are. It would be so hard to explain it all to you now. You have brought me so much happiness, Katie, and I fear that I have deprived you of so much. I only hope everything will turn out well in the end. I have written to James requesting he tell you your true identity when I die. He is the only other one who knows about you. If my letter has not reached him, and you find this book, then go and search him out. Lord Emerson may know where he may be.
Your loving mother,
Nancy Dow
Katie now realized that James would have never helped her. Once he discovered she knew nothing of her own identity, he proceeded with his own plans. James never intended to tell Katie who she really was. In fact, he had tried to keep her from finding out on her own. He knew there was proof at Windy Gates all along, and this very book was probably what he was looking for. That was why he didn't want her returning to Windy Gates. That was why he offered to pack everything for her. Nancy told him that she was keeping a record, and that she had the broach, but where was it? Had James found it during his search?
Alden must have known too, that Katie didn't know who she was, if he was in on this with James. His motive must have been wanting to marry James' daughter, which meant the real heiress must be put out of the way. It must have been a strange surprise to him when he found the real heiress, and had already decided to marry the fake one.
What was Alain and Justin's part? They claimed the heiress had died falling down a well. Justin said there were things she did not know and that James was dangerous. Had Alain really overheard something, but not the story she gave Katie?
If only Nancy had told her the truth. In spite of Nancy's unwillingness to revile to Katie her true identity, Katie still loved her just the same for the simple fact that she was the only mother Katie had ever known.
A tear trickled slowly down the side of Katie's nose, and her body shook in anguish for the loss of a mother who had loved her as much or even more than her real mother, and at the loss of her real mother that she never had the opportunity to get to know.
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