by Alex Wolf
“Dickhead?”
“That’s what I said, isn’t it?”
Fuck this.
I’ll show her the answer to her question.
I close the distance between us and cup her face with both palms, then stare straight into her fiery eyes. Before she can pull away, I slant my mouth over hers and kiss the ever-loving shit out of her.
Her lips are even softer than I remember. I slide a hand down her neck, along her curves, all the way to her ass, then yank her hard against me.
That’s my fucking problem. I’m a goddamn man.
I don’t play little boy games.
When I want something, I take it.
The kiss is sweet and faster than I’d like but it is what it is. Now she knows and she can quit toying with me like I’m on the same level as those shit birds in the bar.
I’m interested.
Her eyelashes flutter for a moment, and she’s in a daze.
She leans toward my mouth, but I pull away, even though it’s the last thing I ever want to do.
What I want to do and what I need to do are two different things. I want to pull her tight little ass into a cab, take her back to my place, and bury my face between her thighs until she comes so many times she can’t breathe.
Abigail stares back at me with her baby blues, seemingly in a trance. I may have kissed her so hard she went catatonic. Her fingers move to her lips.
“That’s what the hell my problem is.” I walk away instead of kissing her again.
I don’t look back when I hear my name come from her lips. She can think about shit for a while.
Nope, I keep walking down Michigan Avenue until I find myself at the gym.
I swipe my card and grab the spare clothes I keep in my locker. I need to burn off all this frustration and pent up energy before I do something stupid.
Fuck, she has me so wound up.
I want to take it out on someone, and I definitely don’t want it to be her. As enjoyable as it might’ve been, I didn’t want to take it out on her friends either.
Friends.
She really needs to get rid of those guys. You can tell by looking at them they’re hanging onto a dream, that someday she’ll get too drunk or have a really bad day, and they’ll slide in when she’s vulnerable and get to put their little baby dicks inside her one time. I know how those fuckers operate. They’ll waste months, clinging to someone who has no interest in them, in hopes of taking advantage of them just once. How pathetic can you be?
It was only a matter of time before I blew up on one of them. It’s not like I can really blame them for wanting to hang out around her. Abigail is gorgeous. She’s funny and a little bit of a goof when she wants to be. She makes me smile.
As I start my workout, my brain settles down and I do what I do best; analyze. There are more than a few problems at play here. For one, she’s young. Too damn young for me but I can’t help the attraction. She’s twenty-four, but she’s way more mature than I was at that age. That’s not saying much. She’s probably more mature than I am now, if I’m being honest.
Another problem; she’s one of Tate’s Dallas transfers, and I’m sure Tate would not approve, and Abigail probably listens to her more than anyone. I get along with Tate better than any of my brothers, but we both know it’s just to keep the peace and for Decker. I’m sure if given the opportunity, Tate would tell Abigail what a player I am if she finds out we’re seeing each other. She wouldn’t be wrong for doing it either.
I can’t help the fact I like women. I like fucking them and I like making them come. It’s just what I do. I’ve never been so fixated on one, though. The more I think about it, the more I realize I haven’t even thought about sleeping with another woman since I met Abby.
I throw two twenty-five on the bench press, trying to rid myself of this confusion. I don’t have time for it. The biggest client of my life is within reach and I should be devoting a hundred percent of my time to getting that signature on the dotted line.
After three sets on the bench, I hit the treadmill, my feet racing against my thoughts in a battle to see who’ll win as music from my phone filters through my headphones and pounds in my ears. These Abigail-induced runs need to stop. This shit is bleeding over to work, and I can’t have it become a problem. At least this time I won’t be cold as fuck and get pissed off all over again, after going on an Abigail run at night. The music is an epic fail. I couldn’t tell you the last five songs I listened to. All I can think about is her and how I can still taste her on my lips.
The worst part is, I want to taste her again.
Abigail
It’s been two days since Dexter stunned me with that kiss. It wasn’t a good kiss. It was a smack-you-in-the-face, steal-your-breath-away kind of kiss. It was deep and passionate and forceful, and God, possessive. The way his rough hands and fingers dug into my ass and yanked me into him, like I was his and only his.
Then he just walks away without even looking back?
I’ve never had a guy kiss me then just leave me hanging. How do I even interpret that? It makes no sense. I don’t know what to make of the situation or him.
I’ve never been one of those girls who gets excited when men fight over her, but I’d be lying if I said it didn’t turn me on like no other, how jealous Dex looked. I don’t know what he has to be jealous of. It’s not like I have feelings for Kyle or any of the other guys. They’re completely harmless.
Kyle thinks Dex is a smug bastard, but he doesn’t know him the way I do. He doesn’t know him at all.
I apologized when I went back inside and said it was a rough day at work.
The more I looked at Kyle and his reactions, the more I tried to figure things out. Could Kyle possibly want more than friendship? No way. He’s just a friendly neighbor. He’s never once tried to make a move or ask me out or anything like that.
I’m so conflicted right now. I could fall for Dexter, that’s for sure. What’s not to like about that situation? He’s successful, handsome, and charming but he’s also older than me and we work together.
I need to step back and just slow down. I moved to Chicago to have fun. Get in life experiences before thinking of settling down with anyone. I’ve seen so many friends get married right out of high school, settle down, and start having babies, and never really go out and live at all.
There’s nothing wrong with that lifestyle, it’s just not for me. I want to travel and see the world and have fun before I get married and have those types of responsibilities. I don’t want to be accountable to another person right now. I’m in the prime of my life and I want to enjoy it, get everything I can out of every day.
There’s only one problem, though. Dexter has me questioning my entire life plan after that dang kiss. That ridiculous, pulse-shattering kiss that threw my world off its axis.
I shuffle my fork through my salad looking for a piece of grilled chicken. I’m eating in the cafeteria today instead of going out for lunch. If I want to move out, I need to save some money. Originally, I was saving for a car, so I wouldn’t have to rely on public transportation, but I find I don’t mind the train at all. It’s actually kind of nice.
What I do mind, is my nutty roommate and her boyfriend. He slept over every day this week.
“You look deep in thought.” Quinn slides into the chair across from me. “Mind if I join you?” She has law books with her.
I can’t help but notice the huge emerald engagement ring on her finger. It’s freaking gorgeous and perfect for her. It makes me want to swoon, just thinking about the night Deacon gave it to her. I still can’t believe I smacked Dex in the back of the head. It was playful, like Gibbs on NCIS, but I’ll admit, I had a few cocktails in me at the time.
I glance up and Quinn’s probably making conversation so she can get out of studying. It’s what I’d do. She’s sitting for the bar exam soon, and I’ll feel horrible for her and Deacon if she doesn’t pass. I’m sure she will, though. She’s crazy smart and probably
the hardest worker I’ve ever met. I definitely look up to her when it comes to professional conduct. She’s always put together and one step ahead of everyone.
“Sure, have a seat.”
“Good.” She unpacks her lunch. It looks like a container of soup and a sandwich. “So what are you debating with yourself?”
“I’m… I’m not… I was just thinking about some stuff.”
“Stuff that had you looking like you were about to murder your salad?” Quinn grins as she crumbles crackers into her bowl of soup.
I don’t really have anyone to talk about relationship stuff with. I mean I live with Barbie, but we’re not friends. She’d find a way to make the conversation about her. There’s Kyle, but I could never talk to him about Dexter. He made his feelings about Dex perfectly clear.
I have to get these thoughts out of my head. “What’s the deal with Dexter?” I cringe as I ask the question. Well, it’s out in the open now.
“What do you mean? Like as a boss, coworker, friend, or like as in a boyfriend?”
“I don’t know.” I bury my face in my palms and think maybe the world will disappear along with this conversation. I’m so bad at this. “I don’t know anything right now.”
“I’m just giving you a hard time.” She blows on her spoonful of soup. “Dexter’s a good guy. Obviously, he did something, though. Just get it out. You’ll feel better.”
I still can’t look at her. “This stays between us, right?” I’m so terrible at this gossip thing and I have to be super careful. Quinn’s not just any girl. She’s Deacon’s fiancée. As in she lives with Dexter’s twin brother. I don’t want her running behind my back and spilling this conversation to Deacon. It might get back to Dex.
“You can trust me.”
“Okay.” I suck in a breath then exhale, because I really want the information she has to offer. “Dexter and I have hung out a few times after work. Nothing major, just grabbing a drink at The Gage, normal stuff people at the firm do. I invited him out the other day to meet up with me and some friends and he was rude to them for no reason.”
“Were they guys?”
“Who?”
“The other friends you invited.”
“Yeah, why?”
She stares at me like I’m from outer space. “I know you’re younger but come on. Men love to piss on everything in the room, to mark their territory. The Collins brothers more than anyone. He likes you. Honestly, the other day I told Tate I thought you guys were secretly dating because he never shuts up about you. Him and Deacon are like this, so I overhear everything.” She crosses two of her fingers. “It’s the whole twin thing.”
“Really? He talks about me?”
“Yeah. I mean, he tries to not make it obvious, keeps it subtle. But he always finds a way to bring you up in conversations.”
“Huh.” I had never thought about Dex having conversations with his brother outside of work, and I definitely wouldn’t have thought he’d talk about me.
“Was that all he did?”
“Well, umm…”
She leans in and grins. “Come on, give it up.”
“Well, there was a kiss.” My cheeks must be ten shades of pink. I can’t remember ever doing this before, talking to another woman other than my mom about a guy. Even that is rare because I’ve never dated anyone seriously.
“Nice.” She slow nods. “Tell me more.”
“Okay fine. There have been two, but I don’t know if the first one really counts.”
“Why wouldn’t it count?”
“It was the night at the Bears game, when he got me to take care of your dad.”
“So… we both got a little lucky that day, huh?” She jabs me with her elbow.
“Well, we were both hammered. I don’t even know if he remembers doing it. We were with all the football players after you’d left. God, it’s all so blurry.”
“What about the second time?”
“When we were at the bar the other day, he was really shitty to my friends. So, I pulled him aside to ask what his deal was, and he blew me off saying he had to go. I got pissed and ambushed him outside. There was this intense moment and he just kissed me, and I mean he kissed me good.”
Quinn nods. “They do that. The Collins boys. They sure do.”
I snap my fingers in front of her face when she gets this far-off look in her eye, like she’s reliving every kiss ever with Deacon. “We’re talking about me here.”
Quinn laughs. “Sorry, continue.”
“Well, afterward he didn’t say anything. He just walked off. No look back. No nothing. I just stood there in a daze. And the past few days he’s avoided me, and I don’t know what to do or what to say. It’s driving me insane.”
“Do you like him?”
“I mean… I don’t know, I’m so confused. I just… don’t like feeling awkward, and that’s what everything feels like right now.”
“Well, I have experience dating a Collins brother, and my advice is to track him down and make him talk. Yes, they act like boys, but they’re calculated. Whatever he’s doing, it’s for a reason. You have to keep them on their heels.”
She makes it sound so easy. I don’t even know what I’d say and I’m probably reading way too much into it. He probably just got caught up in the moment.
She looks at her phone. “Oh shoot. We better get back.”
I get up to leave and she grabs me lightly by the forearm.
“We’ll talk soon. I want a follow up.”
“Yeah. Okay. I need to head your way. Decker wants to see me.” I gather up my stuff and toss what’s left of my salad in the trash.
We walk back to the elevator and get off on our floor.
“I think he’s in there alone for another few minutes. Good timing.” Quinn nods to his office.
I walk through the doors and Decker’s head pops up from behind his computer. “Perfect. I have something for you. Have a seat.”
Decker rifles through some folders, and I can’t help but appreciate how neat and exact he is about everything. He always gives very specific instructions, and I love these special projects he assigns me. There’s always a clear task and a deadline. If I could only have that type of order in my personal life, I’d be in heaven. I always feel like I’m spiraling out of control outside of these walls. The job keeps me centered, like I have a purpose.
He finally finds what he’s looking for but pushes it to the side. “Sorry, had to get that separated or it would drive me nuts.”
“What can I do for you, Mr. Collins?”
“I need you to do some research. You’re the best I’ve got at this kind of shit.”
I nod, my chest swelling with pride. I don’t know if anyone, other than my parents, has ever told me I’m the best at something, and it feels amazing to hear it from the managing partner. “Thank you, sir. What am I researching?”
“Not what, who. I need you to have a look at Wells Covington. He’s a hedge fund manager. Has a residence in Chicago, but splits time with Manhattan. I’m sure he has real estate there as well.”
“Anything specific you’re looking for?”
Decker stands and walks around his desk, then leans back against it and folds his arms over his chest. I can’t help but notice how much him and all the other brothers look alike. Not just their looks, either, their mannerisms and the way they speak and phrase things. It’s like I’m staring at an older, more mature Dexter; like what he’ll be like in five or six years.
“I just want to know if he has any secrets. Don’t focus on his work and that type of thing. I want to know about his personal life, hobbies, etc.”
“So extracurricular activities outside of work?”
“Exactly.”
“When do you need this by?”
“Make it a priority. As soon as possible.”
I nod once more. “Okay. I’ll get started right away.”
“Thanks, Abigail.”
I stand up and walk out of the office. It�
�s nice to be sought after for special jobs like this, especially from the head of the firm. Plus, the research isn’t that difficult. You can find out anything about anyone on social media. They all think I’m a genius at using it. Maybe it’s because I’m younger than most of the other paralegals, but I grew up with it and know how to navigate all the platforms.
When I get home from work, there’s a note from Barbie on the fridge.
Please be considerate when you get ready in the morning. I’m on night shift tonight and will be going to bed when you wake up.
–Barbie
Ugh!
She’s so annoying. I’m not even loud. She works at the hospital assigning patients to beds or something. I can’t remember what she told me exactly. I wasn’t really listening. I’m terrible, but it was when I first moved in and I was so tired. She’s like a female Sheldon Cooper with a normal IQ. I should leave her a note that says tell your boyfriend to take his morning dump at his own house.
I shove my stuff onto the counter and trudge down the hall after crumpling her note up. I kick my heels off and shimmy out of my skirt and hose in exchange for a pair of sweats and a tee. After letting my hair down, I toss the bra aside since I don’t have to worry about Chuck showing up.
My stomach growls, voicing its disapproval of half a chicken salad in the cafeteria this afternoon. I’m starving, but I don’t want to cook anything. I should since I need to save money, but it’s been a long day, and I just want to curl up on the sofa and veg out while I have the apartment to myself.
Barbie doesn’t like anyone eating on the couch. She acts like it’s a five-thousand-dollar leather sectional. It’s a Walmart special, but the last thing I want is to be on her radar, then suffer her on the warpath.
I grab the stack of takeout menus from a kitchen drawer and collapse onto the sofa, sinking down while I make a dinner decision. I’m not in the mood for Chinese or Thai. I could go for a pizza, but I know if I get one most will get thrown away, unless I invite Kyle over.
I’m not exactly up for his company tonight and there’s really no reason I shouldn’t be.