by Aimee Carter
We stood there for a long moment, and at last he wrapped his arm around me, pulling me closer. “You can tell me anything, you know.”
“I know,” I said softly.
“Then tell me what has been bothering you.”
I focused on the horizon. I couldn’t lie to him. I didn’t want to, and even if I tried, he would know. “We’re in the middle of a war, and we’re both being used as pawns in ways we don’t understand.”
“That is not atypical for my brother,” said Henry with a hint of mirth.
“That’s not what I mean. We’re all on one big chessboard, aren’t we? Cronus is on one side and Walter’s on the other, using everyone like chess pieces. Except I’m not so much as a pawn on Walter’s side.”
Henry opened his mouth, but I interrupted him before he had the chance to speak.
“Don’t tell me I’m wrong. We both know I’m not. I’m useless to Walter. I’ve tried to give him information, act as an envoy, learn how to fight so I can help everyone, but he isn’t having it. Cronus though—he’s moving me around like I’m a damn king piece. One step at a time in any direction he wants, but I can never venture too far on my own, because if I do, if he loses me...”
“He will not lose the war if he loses you, if that is what you are thinking.” Henry turned so he was facing me, and he held my stare. There was something earnest and anxious in his eyes, as if he were desperate to make me understand. “You are not a king piece to him. If you are anything at all, you are a pawn. Something small and inoffensive, easily overlooked, nothing more than fodder. If he gets you where he wants you though—so deep into enemy territory that we don’t even know you’re there—then you will become more to him. But only because of the role you play, not who you are. Despite the illusion of whatever he is offering you, you will be nothing more than another piece of the game to him. Do you understand?”
I took a deep breath and released it slowly. There was no good solution to any of this. “Cronus wants me. Whatever ungodly reason he has for it, whatever he thinks of me, having me means something to him. I can’t ignore that.”
“I’m not asking you to,” said Henry. “I’m asking you to think of me, to think of Milo, and realize that you’re no good to either of us if he has you. You cannot trust a Titan.”
“Now you’re starting to sound like Walter,” I mumbled.
“He has a point about Cronus. The only person who can stop him from reneging on a deal is Rhea, and she’s already made her position on this war clear. In the meantime, it isn’t worth the risk. Milo is safe. Ava’s taking care of him, and she will not let anything happen to him.”
“She already let something happen to him, though,” I said. “And how do I know that the first chance she gets, she won’t throw him into the ocean?”
“If she does, then we ought to consider ourselves lucky,” said Henry, pulling me into another hug. “Phillip would find him, and we would have him back again.”
“But what if Calliope decides to kill Milo, after all? She has the dagger. She has Cronus. She could do it. Cronus could do it if I refuse to go to him—”
“If Cronus or Calliope threatens to kill our son, I will rip them apart with my bare hands,” said Henry. “You are not alone in this fight, Kate. Do not forget that. I have already failed you more times than I can count, and I will not do it again.”
“You haven’t—” The words caught in my throat. “You haven’t failed me.”
“You died on my watch,” he said. “And my feelings for Persephone—”
“Ancient history. You haven’t failed me, got it? And I’m not going to let you storm in there on your own.”
He ran his fingers through my hair. “Nor will I allow you to do so either. We are in this together no matter what happens. I will not make the mistake of leaving you behind again. All I ask is that you do the same for me, as well.”
Cold horror hit me. He knew. Somehow, someway, he knew what I was planning, and instead of admitting it and forcibly stopping me, he was trying to reason with me. He was giving me a choice.
But he’d also made the consequences of me making the wrong decision painfully clear. If I ran off on my own to try to protect Milo and stop this war, he would, too. And we both knew his attempts would be a hell of a lot bloodier than mine.
I tilted my head upward to capture his lips, kissing him with every ounce of passion and frustration and guilt inside me. He had to understand. “I love you, and I will always be yours.”
“And I yours. We will have our future,” whispered Henry. Despite everything that was happening around us, despite the wrenching choices we both faced, I believed him completely.
On my last day before surrendering to Cronus, my mother tracked me down. I’d been practicing for ages, and Henry had long since grown tired of chasing me around Olympus. In spite of the hours I’d clocked disappearing and reappearing in random places throughout the palace, I hadn’t seen all of Olympus yet. Now I never would, but it was a stupid regret to have, all things considered.
“We need to talk,” said my mother as I reappeared in the throne room.
“About what?” I said, forcing my voice to remain steady. No use giving her any reason to think I was up to something, and if anyone could figure it out, it was my mother. Unless Henry had already told her.
“You’ve been anxious lately,” she said, and I swore inwardly.
“We’ve all been on edge.”
She couldn’t argue with that. Instead my mother pursed her lips. “Do you want to talk about it?”
Yes. I wanted to crawl into her lap like I had when I was a kid and admit every stupid thing I’d done and every idiotic thing I’d agreed to. I wanted her to tell me that everything would be all right, and I didn’t have to worry anymore, because she would fix it.
This wasn’t something she could solve with a wave of her hand or a few gentle words though, and for the first time in my life, I began to understand that she wasn’t the all-powerful mother I’d always thought she was. She was human, or at least as close to human as a member of the council could be. She made mistakes, too, and she didn’t always have the answers.
“I can’t,” I mumbled, and she motioned for me to join her. I curled up in her lap without a second thought. Why couldn’t things be simple again?
They hadn’t been simple for years though, not since I was fourteen and my mother had been diagnosed. And while I’d had the illusion of simplicity in the years before that, they’d never really been easy, had they? She’d had to raise me knowing what was coming. The council had always loomed over me, waiting until I was old enough to put me through a test no girl before me had survived. My mother had known the risks. She’d known what the inevitable looked like, yet she’d always been there and always loved me with everything she had. Now it was my turn to do the same for Milo.
“You’re a good girl, Kate,” she murmured, holding me close. “Do what you have to do to protect your family.”
I hugged her back tightly. So Henry had told her, after all. Did the entire council know now? Did it matter, as long as they weren’t trying to stop me? “I love you,” I said, clinging to her.
“I love you, too, sweetheart.” She rubbed my back in slow circles. “Everything will be all right in the end. Evil never lasts forever, and neither will this.”
Even though I knew she was right, even though she said the exact words I’d needed to hear, she couldn’t predict what would happen in the meantim
e. No one could. And that was what I was really afraid of.
Later, in our bedroom, Henry and I didn’t speak. We lost ourselves in each other, a silent farewell that neither of us could bear to say. If I hadn’t been certain before, I was now; he was letting me go, and it would only be a matter of time before I discovered the price we would both have to pay for it.
As my time dwindled to less than half an hour before I was due to surrender to Cronus, I still couldn’t bring myself to say goodbye. I waited until Henry’s chest rose and fell in the steady rhythm of sleep, but he didn’t fool me. He was awake, and I gave us both one last moment of pretending and slipped away in silence.
James was waiting for me in the hallway, leaning up against the wall with a scowl on his face. “Going somewhere?”
“I—” I paused. “You can’t stop me.”
“No doubt about that,” he said, taking my hand and leading me toward the throne room. As badly as I wanted to pull away, I couldn’t. Not when this might be the last time I’d ever see him. “Are you sure about this?”
“If you were me, what would you do?”
“I would have left ages ago.”
At least he understood, but I didn’t have time for this. If I wasn’t in Calliope’s palace in twenty minutes, Cronus would kill millions more. “If you’re not trying to stop me, then what are you here for?”
“Everyone gets a goodbye except me?” he said, and I hugged him around the middle.
“I’m sorry. I meant to tell you.”
“That’s a lie, but thanks for the thought,” said James without a hint of anger. “So what’s the plan?”
I didn’t speak. It wasn’t any of his business, and if I told him, I ran the risk of him trying to interfere and screw everything up. I trusted James, but I’d trusted Ava, too. I’d trusted Calliope. Each time something terrible happened, that trust bit me in the ass. If this plan had any chance of succeeding, I had to keep my mouth shut.
James didn’t press the issue until we reached the empty throne room. Stopping in the center, he searched my face for something he obviously couldn’t find. “You can trust me,” he said. “I want to help.”
“The moment I tell you, you’re going to do everything in your power to stop me,” I said without anger or accusation. It was the truth, and we both knew it.
“I swear I’ll only help,” he said, tracing an X over his chest. “Cross my heart, word of honor, stick a needle...” He grimaced. “Actually, no, not that last part. Doesn’t even rhyme properly.”
I punched him lightly in the arm. “And how do you plan on helping? By running to Walter and telling him everything so he can stop me?”
James scoffed. “Is that what you think of me? You’re sneaking away to live in sin with a mass murderer, and I’m the bad guy here?”
Any small amount of amusement I’d managed in those few minutes with him evaporated. “You know I don’t have a choice.”
“You do have a choice,” he countered. “You’ve just made it already, that’s all.”
“What else would you have me do?”
He shrugged. “Couldn’t say. I’d do the exact same thing.”
My anger deflated. “Then give me a hug goodbye and let me go. I might be an infant compared to the rest of you, but that doesn’t make me an idiot.”
“Most of the time,” said James, and I punched him in the arm again. Wordlessly he gathered me up and buried his face in my hair. “I was supposed to be your first affair.”
A lump formed in my throat, and I hugged him back fiercely. “I don’t think it counts as an affair if the thought of Cronus makes me sick to my stomach.”
“So there’s still hope for me, after all.”
I half laughed, half sobbed. “You’re an ass.”
“Runs in the family.” He let me go. “Be safe, Kate. I mean it. If you die, Henry will—”
“—tear the entire world apart with his bare hands,” I said. “Yeah, I know. Believe it or not, I really want me to stay alive, too.”
“Despite all evidence to the contrary.” He smiled faintly, and I touched his elbow.
“Do me a favor. Find someone for you, okay? Not a fling or a mortal to marry for fifty years before she dies, but someone to really settle down with. You’re, what, several thousand years old? Don’t you think it’s time?”
His smile faltered for a split second. “I would’ve settled down with you, but then you had to go and marry my uncle. You’re a little heartbreaker, you know.”
I rolled my eyes. “You’re terrible. I mean it. You deserve someone—someone who isn’t already taken. Go out and find her. Or him. Just find someone.” I drew myself up to my full height. “I’m going to be mad at you until you do.”
“It took Henry a thousand years to find you,” said James. “You think you could really be mad at me for that long?”
“Henry doesn’t get out much. You do.” I kissed his cheek. “I’m serious. There has to be a minor goddess out there somewhere who’s absolutely head over heels for you.”
“Who I haven’t already deflowered— Ow.” James rubbed his shoulder, where I’d punched him a third time. “You’re awfully violent today.”
“And you’re awfully crass.”
He captured me in another hug. “Too bad you didn’t have a daughter.”
“If I had, I’d have told her to stay the hell away from you.”
“Even as a newborn?”
“You can never start too early.”
Kissing the top of my head, he slid his hand into mine. “Fair enough. Now what do you say to getting out of here?”
We were back to that again. I sighed. “I don’t need your help, James. I’m fine on my own. I’ve got it all figured out.”
“Do you now?” he said, eyebrow raised. “Then tell me—how do you plan on getting off Olympus? By taking the stairs?”
I hesitated. “Can I?”
“This isn’t a Led Zeppelin song, sweetheart. There are no stairways to heaven.” He gestured to the sunset floor. “Walter has this place locked down right now, which means there’s only one way out of here, and that’s to have an Olympian escort you. Ready?”
I eyed him, searching for any sign that he was about to run off to Walter. But time was slipping away, and I didn’t have much of a choice. “If I let you, do you swear you’re just helping?”
“Everything short of the needle,” he said. How was it possible he could make me smile even in the middle of the hardest thing I’d ever had to do?
Because he was James, and because I could have loved him like that if I didn’t already love Henry. I did have Henry though, and I would never cheat on him. James knew it, I knew it—the only person who didn’t was Henry himself.
Standing on my tiptoes, I kissed the corner of his mouth, lingering for longer than was strictly necessary. “First affair, I promise,” I whispered. “Now let’s do this.”
James grinned. “Thought you’d never say so.”
We arrived smack-dab in the middle of the busiest intersection I’d ever seen. Hundreds of people moved together in varying directions, streams intersecting and merging like real traffic, and I squinted upward in hopes of gaining my bearings. Pink and purple clouds decorated the sky, which was barely visible through the thick forest of skyscrapers that surrounded us.
Standing still in the chaos wasn’t an option though, and I wound up sandwiched between two Japanese businessmen in black suits, both carrying briefcases and chatting i
n a language I didn’t know. However, like in Africa and Greece, even though I didn’t know the words, I understood them anyway.
“...morning meeting with the executive from San Francisco?”
“Indeed, but wouldn’t you say—”
“James!” I shouted, struggling against the flow of the crowd, but it was useless. With less than ten minutes left before Cronus’s deadline, I couldn’t find James anywhere.
The businessmen on either side of me gave me a dirty look, as if they’d only now realized I was there, and they shifted until I was behind them. Fine by me.
“James!” I shrieked again as I reached the sidewalk. Elbowing my way through the crowd, I reached the glass face of a building and leaned against it, directly underneath a neon sign advertising electronics. This was insane. How could there possibly be this many people in one place at one time?
“First time in Tokyo?” said an amused voice beside me. James leaned casually against the wall, and he held a bowl of noodles with his right hand while he maneuvered a pair of chopsticks with his left.
“Very funny. I’m leaving now.” I closed my eyes and started to slip away, but James’s hand on my shoulder stopped me.
“I will,” he said around a mouthful of noodles. “I’ll find someone as long as you promise me this isn’t forever.”
I touched his hand. “I promise. I’ll see you on the other side of this war, James.”
“And maybe with a little luck, we’ll both be alive.”
I kissed his cheek one last time and stepped back, giving myself enough space to go. This wasn’t the end. If I couldn’t make sure of it, then James would.
“Wait,” he said again, and with a wave of his hand, his noodles vanished. “How do you intend on getting Milo back to Henry?”
I stared at him. What else was he going to come up with to get me to take him with me? Regardless of how much of a manipulative jerk he’d suddenly decided to be, however, he had a point. I’d taken for granted that Cronus would let me bring Milo to Olympus myself, or that he would send him to Olympus—but Cronus had no way of getting there, and once I landed on the island, I was positive I would never be able to leave. At least not until this war was over.