Once we both stopped bouncing, Zeke sighed. “Of all the beds I thought I’d end up in tonight, yours did not cross my mind. Not even once.”
“You thought you’d end up in Darby’s, huh?”
“No,” he said with a chuckle.
“Can’t blame you there. She’s beautiful.”
He laughed again. “I said no, Naomi. I was interested, but she’s just a good friend.”
“Mmmhmmm.”
He looked over at me. “Are you jealous?”
“Am I jealous?” Yes. Yes, I am. Fuck.
He relaxed back, unwilling to call me out. “She is beautiful, and she’s sweet too. But she’s had it bad for Trex since they met, so I’m clearly not her type. He’s got that mysterious, rugged, broody thing going. I have a couple of friends like that, and the girls fall all over them. I’d introduce you if they weren’t both already with someone.”
“You want to hook me up with your friends? As in plural?”
“No. I don’t, actually. But gauging by your reaction in the car earlier, I’m guessing you want nothing to do with me.”
“I wouldn’t say that,” I said, keeping my eyes on the ceiling. I could see Zeke peer over at me from my peripheral. “But I do appreciate you thinking I require two men to keep up with me.”
“That’s not what I meant. They’re twins. I was just saying… Christ, never mind.” He sighed.
“Sorry I’ve been such a hard ass. It’s just easier.”
“Than what?”
“Than putting up with it, I guess? Being polite? Making sure the feelings and ego of the man hitting on me unsolicited are preserved?”
“I get it. I can’t imagine having ti … breasts. Some guys don’t think straight around women. When we’re up on the mountain the guys are normal like they are when we’re just hanging out in Estes at the dorms. But we go out and they just act … stupid. And it’s not just them. All men. I’m guilty too.”
“You’re not so bad,” I said.
“I was with someone for a long time. I’ve watched my friends acting stupid. Gave me a different perspective, I guess.”
“How lon—never mind.”
“It’s okay,” he said. He cleared his throat. “Since high school until a couple of years ago.”
“High school sweethearts? That’s cute I guess.”
“Nothing special about it. I thought I was going to marry her. She was my first everything, and then I lost her.”
“She … she died?”
“She stopped loving me.”
“Ouch.”
“She’s married now. A baby on the way.”
“Keep up with her on social media?”
“God, no. I can barely stand to hear about it much less watch it. My little brother goes to school with hers.”
“Sorry.”
“You’re getting pretty good at that,” he said. I could see him look over at me again from the corner of my eye, but I kept my gaze focused on the ceiling. “Watts said you were married.”
“I am.”
“Where is he?”
I sighed. “He died.”
“Oh, damn.”
“Don’t say you’re sorry. And no, I don’t want to talk about it.”
“You don’t have to.”
We were quiet for a few minutes. Zeke didn’t seem to mind.
“You can stay. If you want,” I said.
“Do you need me to?” he asked. I looked at him, and he met my gaze.
I hated to ask anything of him after being such a dick, but it was more than me not wanting to be alone. I was genuinely enjoying his company. Zeke had a calming effect, even when he was frustrated with me, and it didn’t hurt that he was unconventionally good-looking. He was missing the swagger of men who had experienced high school as a typical popular jock getting a blow job from a different cheerleader every weekend. He’d probably glowed-up after graduation and his former co-eds were all kicking themselves when they came across him on social media. Hopefully—especially—the one who’d stopped loving him.
I nodded to answer his question. He had no idea how hot he was, and I liked that.
The corners of his mouth turned up, a hint of a smile on his face. “Then I’ll stay.”
“Thank you,” I said, tapping my fingers against my hand, returning my sights on the ceiling.
Zeke was pure, effortless, and everything else I needed more of in my life.
“What are you doing tomorrow?” he asked.
“Nothing.”
“Wanna hang out again?”
“Sure.” I wasn’t sure if I was coming across as indifferent as I wanted. I realized too late that Colorado Springs was about four thousand feet higher in elevation than Vegas, and that always slightly messed with my ability to drink.
“Yeah?” he asked, surprised.
“Yeah,” I said, smiling at him.
“Still not sleeping with you,” he said, serious.
I breathed out a laugh, turned my back to him, and fell asleep.
chapter ten
widow
Zeke
W
atts was staring a hole through me, waiting for me to answer. We’d been loading carbs since we arrived in the lobby at four a.m., preparing for the hike in since the current crew had reported not being able to get in by helo. They didn’t have our pilot, though.
We sat at our crumb-covered table, the sweat rings from our waters beginning to resemble Olympic symbols, syrup dribbles dotting any spaces not covered by dirty plates, and powdered sugar dusting the edges. I got up to get a rag, trying to save Darby or anyone else the trouble of cleaning up after us.
“Hey,” I said, seeing Reese ambling around near Check-In.
She walked over, her tank top still white, a contrast against her bronze skin. She was usually covered in grease. The sleeves of her olive-green coveralls were tied loosely around her waist. I wasn’t sure I’d seen her in any other outfit.
“Hey,” she spoke around the wad of gum in her mouth. “You getting ready to roll out?” She waited then prompted me again. “Ground control to Zeke,” she said, snapping twice in my face.
“Sorry, it’s weird to see you here without your pilot. I don’t think I’ve ever seen one of you without the other unless he’s in the air.”
She shifted, nervous. “Bobby’ll be here by sunrise. I had to pack up and come down here last night. They’re moving me here for the duration so the helo can stay closer.”
“Where was it?”
“Steamboat Springs,” she said, looking around.
“Everything okay?” I asked.
“Yeah,” she said, returning her focus to me. “Still waiting on my tooling to get here. I’m sort of useless without it. The helo is good to go for the day, and he’ll be here by the time you reach fire camp.”
“Sounds good,” I said.
Reese walked away, taking a gulp of her energy drink.
“That shit’ll kill ya,” Watts said, his gaze settling on me again.
“So will everything else,” Reese called back.
“Stop looking at me,” I said.
“Then spill it,” Watts said.
Taylor wadded up his napkin and launched it at my face. “Talk, pussy.”
“Do you wanna share about your nights with Falyn?” I asked, sitting.
Taylor crossed his arms, unamused.
“Then shut up,” I said.
“C’mon, man!” Watts begged. “I thought she was married. Didn’t she say she was married? Or did she just say that to let me down easy.”
I leaned forward. “Naomi doesn’t let anyone down easy, and I swear to Christ, Watts, if I ever get to see her again and either of you shit stains bring this up, I’ll kill you in your sleep.”
Taylor breathed out a laugh. I was pretty sure he wasn’t afraid of anything, including death, so my threat didn’t faze him.
“She’s a widow,” I
said, sitting back against the chair. I took another bite of a plain pancake—my fifth—no syrup, no butter, no peanut butter or Nutella, just golden fried batter rolled like a taquito.
“Did she kill him? She looks like she could,” Taylor said.
“Not funny,” I said.
“Morning,” Trex said, waving to us as he made his way to the front desk. Darby was there, looking happy and comfortable with Trex leaning a little bit over the desk to greet her.
“Looks like you missed the boat on that one,” Taylor said. “And now you’re chasing a widow?”
I shook my head. “I’m not taking advantage of her grief or anything, damn. I didn’t know she was a widow when…” I stopped myself.
“When you fell for her?” Watts asked, a shit-eating grin on his face.
“Fuck you,” I grumbled.
Taylor nudged Watts, and they both laughed.
Runt sat at our table sipping coffee, his eyes swollen, his brown hair sticking up in every direction.
“Did Mama not kiss you awake?” Watts asked.
Runt responded with a yawn, blinking slowly. The young ones always had a hard time getting up.
“I’ll kiss you awake,” Watts said.
“Leave him alone,” I said with a frown.
Watts pouted his lip, and again, Runt ignored him. He was a pretty good sport, but sometimes Watts didn’t know when to quit.
“Runt,” Sugar called from two tables over. “Can you bring me a deck of cards and a blanket?”
“Always do,” Runt said, patting his pack.
Runt was the smallest of us, and because of weight restrictions, he was always carrying extra shit for Sugar, who was built like a WWF wrestler even at his leanest. We all had to fit on the helo, and if Sugar was over, he didn’t go. That meant going without even the basics unless Runt agreed to help him out. But Runt always helped him out.
My cell rang, and I stood, making my way to a quiet corner of the lobby. “Hello?”
“Hey!” Jenn said in her chipper voice. “Today is the day.”
“I thought we agreed—”
“I know,” she said with a sigh. “But I just can’t not call my son before he climbs a mountain to fight fires.”
I smiled. She would call me her son every time we talked if she could, but she used it sparingly. I still called her Jenn and still considered myself an outsider despite their best efforts, and she knew it. I wasn’t sure why. Some of my other siblings came in after me, and they all seemed to fit in.
“Where’d you go?” Jenn asked.
“Just thinking about the family. I miss you guys.”
“You do?”
“I do. Why do you sound surprised?”
She stumbled for a response. “I just don’t hear you talk like that very often, I guess. That makes me both happy and sad.”
“I don’t, do I? I’ll do better.”
“It’s okay, Zeke,” she said in her soft mom voice. “I understand. Sometimes it takes years to undo the hurt you’ve experienced. And … on that note I, um… I need to tell you something.”
“What?” I asked, shifting nervously in my seat. Jenn wouldn’t call to give me just any news before I set out on a tour.
“Crystal called for you. She called you here.”
“Crystal?” I said, feeling the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end. My emotions violently yanked from pissed to curious to satisfaction to annoyance that the woman who gave birth to me would bother Jenn.
“She wanted your number at the barracks. I made an executive decision not to give it to her, but I wanted to tell you right away so if you decided you wanted to reach out, you could. I … I have her contact info if you want it.”
“How did she find you?” I asked.
“I guess she read a write-up about the Alpines. She asked for you. She sounded … better. Would you like her number?”
“I’m good,” I said without hesitation.
“Is that a no?” she asked.
“Of course it’s a no. You know I don’t want her in my life. You made the right call.”
“Thank baby Jesus,” Jenn said, relieved.
“You knew that already because you’re my mom,” I said. “You. You gave me a bed. You cooked for me. You drove me to practice. You loved me.”
Jenn was quiet except for a tiny squeak.
“You’re crying, aren’t you?” I said, wincing.
“Hello?” Brad said.
“Hey. Sorry. Didn’t mean to make her cry.”
“Happy tears, Zeke. You just make her so happy.”
“Good. It’s good to know I can do that for at least one woman,” I said, grumbling.
“Uh oh,” Brad said. The kids were already yelling in the background. They were starting to get up for school and were likely running around the kitchen. “There’s a girl?”
“There’s a girl?” Jenn said. After a short scuffle, Jenn was back on the phone. “The girl from the bar? That girl?”
“Not yet. Well, kind of. I like her. She feels like…”
“The one?” Jenn said. It was just like her to jump ten extra steps. She was a romantic, just like Brad. Maybe they were rubbing off on me.
“I don’t know. Maybe. I was over at her house, and I definitely felt a … a familiar connection. She smooths out my edges, but that’s because she’s like sandpaper. She drives me nuts, but I have to be around her. Does that make sense? It’s hard to explain.”
I could hear the smile in the Jenn’s voice when she spoke. “I know exactly what that is.”
“Yeah? What is it?”
“My favorite feeling in the world. She feels like family.”
chapter eleven
secrets
Naomi
“W
hat a day, huh?” Harbinger said, elbowing me. He wasn’t a man of many words, so him trying to defuse the situation wasn’t lost on me.
“You could say that,” I grumbled.
It was barely mid-day, and I was already exhausted. Just over the lunch hour, General Tallis had released me from a six-month probation I didn’t know I was on, and Trex informed me what I sort of, deep down, already knew: Peter had pulled strings to bring me to Colorado Springs and work at the Complex. Now, all eyes were on me, waiting for me to lose my temper a third time.
“Do we need to worry about this guy? Keep an eye on him? Is he stalking you or…?” Sloan asked.
“No,” I said, trying to keep my anger in check. “He’s harmless. He just oversteps on occasion. I’ll take care of it.”
“Do you think that’s why Tallis had you on probation?” Martinez asked.
“Likely,” I said.
“Because you’re a widow, and you joined the same outfit your husband was in when he died,” Harbinger said.
“It is a little weird,” Sloan said with a shrug.
“Lock it up,” Kitsch said before I could respond.
“I can’t believe you knew about this the entire time,” Martinez said.
Trex glared at Martinez, looking guilty and frustrated. He’d already had to put me in my place after my earlier outburst upon hearing the news. He wasn’t in the mood to do it again.
“All right. Break’s over, let’s get moving,” Kitsch said.
Trex stood and patted me on the shoulder. “Want to fuck with the Echo team again?”
I forced a smile. “It’s the best part of my day.”
We patrolled the corridor until we reached the large glass walls and the equally gigantic door. Unlike other days, no one came over the speaker to demand we step back.
I peered into the large room on the other side. Empty tables and chairs in a commons area, a microwave, a television and a few plants. “Looks like a set on a fifties television show.”
“Where do you think they all are?” Trex asked, his eyes taking in every corner of the empty room.
On the back side was the mouth of a hallway, mu
ch smaller than the corridor we stood in. There were a few doors on each side, maybe offices or dorm rooms, but it was dark and hard to tell except for another large door at the back lit by a single yellow rotating light on the ceiling.
“Have you seen that before?” I asked, nodding to the light.
Trex shook his head.
The soldier who usually requested our immediate turnabout ran across the back of the hall, slowing down when he saw us. He was in his regular black and gray fatigues, matching the circles under his eyes. He jogged to the speaker and pressed the button, out of breath.
“Trexler, I’m going to ask you once. Turn around. Today is not the day.”
Trex lowered his jaw, letting the man on the other side see the concern in his eyes. “Everything okay in there? Do you need help?”
The soldier shook his head slowly, exhausted. “You don’t want to be on this side, Trexler. Trust me, just go.”
“If you need help, we’ll help,” I said.
“Get out of here,” he said, slamming his palm on a button. The red light on our side of the door lit up and began to rotate. “Last warning.”
Trex turned around, grabbing me by the sleeve and dragging me with him.
“What the fuck is going on in there?” I asked. “It doesn’t feel right to walk away. He looks sick, Trex.”
“Just walk. He was trying to warn us, Naomi. We’re in over our heads this time.”
I looked at him as he pulled me along, surprised. It wasn’t like Trex to be afraid, but in that moment, for the first time, I saw a glimpse of uncertainty in his eyes.
“You’re scared?” I asked.
He let the words he was about to say simmer in his mouth before he said them. “This stays between us.”
I nodded.
“I have to be more careful, Nomes.”
I shook my head, still confused.
“Darby’s pregnant.”
chapter twelve
dutch boy
Naomi
“Y
ou’ve been to war. Twice… Officially. You’ve led entire units of militia of veterans from all branches. You’ve taken four bullets. You’ve stood up to your mother-in-law, for Christ’s sake. You can do this,” I said aloud.
The Edge of Us (Crash and Burn Book 2) Page 9