by Kenna Bardot
He didn't even pull out as Tate slid against him to stroke himself to his own release. When my face contorted, the sting of Shep's release making the burn unbearable, Tate took pity on me and slid his thumb through my pussy to rub against my clit and rebuild the arousal that had tormented me so.
He still finished inside my ass, flopping back onto the bed. I hadn't even remotely recovered when Ryle snatched me off Shep's lap so that the other man's semi-erect cock slipped free. Putting me to straddle his hips, he sat me on his cock so he sank balls deep into my pussy.
The groan I emitted didn't sound human. It sounded far too animistic to have come from me. He chuckled in my ear when Char slid alongside him inside me, taking up his place behind me. The stretch of taking two of them in my pussy was an entirely different beast than my ass. Beyond the initial stretch, there was nothing but pleasure as the two men worked me over in an easy rhythm that made me feel boneless. My weight collapsed onto Ryle's chest, and only Hollis' weight settling in over my back could draw me out of my stupor.
"Noooo," I moaned, but Ryle held me steady as Hollis guided himself to my ass and slid inside smoothly. His hips could barely move in this position, only making shallow little thrusts inside me, but Ryle and Char fucked all of us with their long glides that I knew he could feel through the thin wall inside me. They all groaned as they fucked me, making me feel like an object they owned.
I knew it was the point.
By God standards, I was theirs. By their standards, I was theirs. So where were the pretty words they'd offered in the Sire trials? The right for me to choose for myself.
Hollis roared out his release first, shoving deep inside me as he came.
When Char's fingers tightened on my hips, I knew what was coming. But when his fingers reached underneath me and pinched my clit until I shattered around he and Ryle, I lost all sense of reason as I collapsed entirely and white light blinded my eyes.
It was only after I came down from my orgasm that I felt the familiar heat scalding my insides, that I felt the way both Ryle and Char twitched in the aftershocks of the intense orgasm that accompanied coming inside me.
"No more," I begged, and Ryle chuckled beneath me.
"You sucked us all dry already, Mireyah."
"No more coming inside me," I said to clarify, and despite my exhaustion I knew my voice carried the weight. The gravity of the situation. "I can't get pregnant right now."
"What?" Char whispered behind me, but his voice had gone deadly.
"It's too dangerous for the baby. With everything going on, I don't want to risk the safety of our child too. At least not until Hydra is grown. She's enough work as it is," I said firmly.
From my position with my head resting on Ryle's chest, I watched the others glance at each other. "A child is our right and our duty," Tate said carefully, but his body vibrated with his anger.
"Do you remember what you said in our Sire trial? You said I could choose. If you go back on that now, I'll never forgive you," I whispered, bringing my knees in towards my chest, holding myself tight into a ball.
They climbed into bed with me, and nothing felt resolved as they settled into silence for sleep. The room was tense, and I didn't know how to fix it.
Not when I knew I was right, and that it was far too dangerous to involve a child in our lives right then.
I just hoped they eventually saw the logic in it.
✽✽✽
I woke up, and I didn't feel rested at all. I'd gone to the bathroom feeling less and less welcome in the home the guys and I had built. It was partially my fault for being away so much, but it seemed so inevitable given the circumstances. Nonetheless, I determined I would try to be with my guys more, because the distance between us was more than just me staying with the dragon guard for several nights.
It spanned bruised feelings and disappointed hopes.
Even though I worried it might make me late again, I sat down to have breakfast with them. But it was a tense and silent affair. I knew they were still hurt because my priorities and loyalties had undoubtedly shifted and they found it hard to remember that the love had never faded. Truth be told, I still resented that they refused to look at me and understand that it was just another change in my life and all I needed was patience.
"Are you still angry?" Tate asked softly, being the first to meet my eyes.
I closed my eyes and shook my head. I couldn’t bear the thought of what would happen when I left. Of the fact that they’d all continue on in their conversations about me without a care for how that might make me feel. "Why don’t you just read me? It’s not like you understand boundaries,” I accused with a snarl.
He reached out to touch a hand to my thigh, and I flinched away from the contact. "Look, I'm trying here. You can be mad that I tried to read you because I know it's wrong but don't pick a fight when I just want things to be normal again. Or at least as close to it as possible."
“And what’s normal, Tate?” I asked with a sardonic laugh. “Have we ever had normal?”
He winced, reaching out to run a finger down my cheek. “I know I hurt you and betrayed your trust. We all did, but you have to know we did it from a place of love.”
“How many times will you use that excuse to justify the way you hurt me?” I growled, pushing my chair out from the table so I could stand and pace around the kitchen in my growing anger.
“Snow,” Shephard whispered, his voice taking on the same tormented tone it always did when the violations of the past came up in conversation. But I couldn’t dance on eggshells out of fear of making them uncomfortable, not when they’d made me a victim and then had the nerve to act like I should just sweep the betrayal under the rug.
I’d forgiven the unthinkable, but I’d never forgotten it. It tainted every argument, reminded me of how little we’d grown in our relationship since then that they thought I could just be treated poorly and I’d forgive it.
What choice did I have if I loved them?
“Don’t,” I snapped. “You hurt me. You may not have violated my body this time, but it was a violation no less. So yes! I’m still fucking angry. Until something changes, I will always be angry. This isn’t healthy, and I won’t tolerate an eternity of it!”
“Pet,” Hollis whispered, standing from his seat to approach me. He was the least threatening of my men, the most submissive and the most likely to be more concerned with listening rather than arguing. But I never forgot that it was his interest in me that started this, that violated me and turned my body against me while Ryle held me down.
“I forgave you! I gave you another chance even when I shouldn’t have, and you just keep taking! Over and over again. And then when we fight, it’s me against the five of you. You defend each other. You stand together. You have each other’s backs!” My voice trailed off as the anger faded, as the tears burned the back of my throat and stung my eyes. Ryle vaulted to his feet, moving toward me and only stopping when I held out a hand in warning. “Who has mine?” I whispered as my voice cracked.
“Winter Girl,” he echoed his own whisper back at me. “We have yours. We always have.”
I shook my head, sniffling as I pinched my nose to stop it from running. “It doesn’t feel that way. It feels like I’m an outsider in my marriage. Not the love. Just the marriage, the unity and compromise that goes hand in hand with it. Like there’s the five of you and the bond you share, and I’m just your Pet. You’re all equals, and I’m just me.”
Char stood slowly, coming to stand in front of me. Where Ryle respected the physical boundary I wanted, he strode right into my hand until it pressed against his chest. Electric currents of pain shot through my palm, much like usually happened when Char failed to control his anger. But there was no anger on his face.
Only concern and the twist of emotions that looked as painful as what vibrated in my soul. “We don’t protect you because you’re our pet,” he whispered, reaching up a hand to stroke his thumb over my bottom lip. The first tear sli
d down my cheek, and his thumb moved to catch it. “We protect you because you’re everything to us. Of all of us, you’re the center. We don’t exist without you.”
The words filled a void inside me, the uncertainty I’d felt in our relationship feeling a little less like a hollow ache. “That’s not true. You existed before me. You existed without me when I was in Sylfeshire,” I whispered. I’d never asked. Never wanted to know about their time together without me. While I knew they’d been separated somewhat as they Ascended at different times, none of them had been alone.
Except for Hollis briefly at the end.
They’d had someone. I’d been alone for years.
Waiting for them. Preparing for them.
“We barely saw each other when you were in Sylfeshire,” Tate murmured, his voice soft as he stood from the table. “Has this bothered you all that time?”
“It was too painful to be together without you,” Char confirmed. “We might have been together before you, but you changed our bond. You changed us, Mireyah. You’re more than just the glue that holds us together or gives us the right to be in a relationship with one another. You’re the reason it’s all worth it.”
“I don’t understand,” I whispered, and Char leaned forward to touch his lips to my forehead.
“Then we’ve failed. Regardless of our intent. We failed you as your Sires if you think you aren’t the most vital piece of us. If something were to happen to you, we’d fall apart. We wouldn’t be together. You’re the center of our Universe, Mireyah. We protect you, because we can’t lose you. Never you.”
I stared at him as they all moved closer, closing ranks around me until each of them touched me in some way or another. “I can’t believe you felt like this and you never said anything. You have to talk to us,” Tate said.
“It appears we need to find a better way to communicate all around,” I said in agreement. I remained quiet otherwise, absorbing the words and the gentle touches. I felt too shattered emotionally to form a response. Too shocked by my own emotions that led to misunderstandings. I had to hope that I could do better in the future.
That we could all do better.
✽✽✽
I got to the Reserve with plenty of time to spare, but the moment I stepped out of the station, I was met by the silver hair of another member of the House of Nastroj. Or former member, anyway, as I realized that it was Elin. I didn’t recognize him with his hair tied back and a long sword in hand. I raised my hand in a wave, but he gave me a somber nod in return.
Uh oh.
"Mireyah, good morning," he greeted with a pat on Hydra's head who immediately ran off to pester Elmira. She was patient enough to humour my dragon's high energy.
"Elin," I greeted back with a nod. "To what do I owe this welcoming committee?"
"I am still worried.”
“I appreciate it, Elin, but I have Sires and I need to see them as I told you. My loyalty is to the Dragon Guard, but it’s also to them. It's a duty I love far more than any of the other alternatives offered to me by my previous Houses. Still, I cannot deny my Sires their right to me." I drilled a finger into his shoulder. "Might be hard for you to understand, given that you're single and unmarried."
"A huge portion of the Dragon Guard are unmarried, I'll have you know. Those who are not, they have married other members of the Dragon Guard because it's hard to maintain a relationship with a member of the general population of Demiorgo," he explained patiently as he rubbed his shoulder.
"I know that! But I wouldn't have become a God unmarried, anyway. Not even a decade ago, I was still a human in Wintercairn. The only way I'm here was through a Sire Bond with Gods I love. The quality of that love is only rivaled by the love I have for Hydra, but it means that I have to be practical. Focusing on one thing means the other is ignored, and I'd rather have a balance." I frowned at him as his smile widened. He was infuriating.
"Besides, Elin Dracari, Madi and Leone were killed here and while that breaks my heart, it might be safer for me to go home where five guys can protect me and my dragon, who is still small enough to be inside the house.”
He threw back his head and laughed. "Okay, you’ve won me over with your logic. Going home on random non-scheduled days outside a fixed routine might be safer. But I want you to promise me you won't make a habit of it. Go home on random days and at random times and inform the guard and the men you seem so confident can protect you."
"They can," I whispered, "they love me.” And it was true. Our conversation just that morning confirmed that for me.
"No need to thank me. Just be safe, that's thanks enough. Patrick will take over now.” He leapt onto Elmira’s back and they flew away.
Twenty-Three
Mireyah
“It is my understanding that you are married to a Vide.” It was more a statement than a question, but I nodded my head, regardless. “Yes, one of my Sires is a Vide.”
The Goddess shot me a blank look and nodded satisfactorily. There was no judgement for the plural that most would have glared at. “Good. I am happy that you have experience with my previous House. It will make the start of your Cadre training easier for me and likely easier for you. No less unpleasant, but at least you will understand better what is happening.”
The last week I’d been reading and fighting. Along with that, I’d been keeping up basic training on Hydra as she grew steadily bigger and bigger. It had nothing to do specifically with becoming an elite, but more an improvement of me and my dragon.
I couldn’t completely complain though. Not when I was still there, and I would take everything they threw at me and make sure I caught everything with arms wide open.
Apparently, the elite force demanded not just that their members be able to go to the Unwanted Lands and do their duty, but they expected us to be well-rounded individuals too. Even once my Unwanted training started, they advised me to still train with Hydra regularly so we could improve our other physical skills and strengthen our bond.
“Did your Sire ever use his powers on you?”
That pain so keen it was almost a dark, forbidden pleasure. “Yes,” I answered simply, even when the sensations Char could spark in me were the farthest from being simple.
“That’s good then. How about on your dragon, Hydra?”
My mouth fell into an ‘o’ because I knew that if Char had ever made the mistake of attacking my Hydra, he would have had to contend with me. And that would be after she finished tearing his face off.
I loved him, I really did, but there were some things that were off-limits. “No, he wouldn’t dare.”
She laughed and nodded. “Of course, but some have, you know? I understand the sentiment. Causing my dragon pain is the last thing I would want to do, even though she feels it when I apply it to myself or to someone in such a large amount that they feel it too. But I suppose the time is here to begin.”
She turned and walked towards the middle of the room, stopping beneath the ceiling light that hung above a thick white mat.
“Please stand in the middle of the mat next to your dragon.” She gestured to it with two fingers before taking two careful steps back.
“Okay, um… Sorry, what was your name?”
She blinked her eyes at me before laughing. “Oh, sorry. Didn’t I say?”
I shook my head, “no.”
“I’m Zia, and I will be your pain mistress today.” She blinked white eyes at me again. “That didn’t sound right, did it?”
I chuckled. “No. Although, to be honest, my Sire has said something similar at some point, so is it just a humour that the entire House Vide shares?”
“Yes, we like our pain jokes. And sometimes they just come off as painful rather than about pain. Are you ready to start?”
I squared my shoulders, my hand immediately reaching down to stroke Hydra. While I was no stranger to the pain that a Vide could dish out, I worried about how she would react to it. Her determination flooded through me and her trust. She knew I woul
d never bring her into a situation that would ever cause her distress. I could only hope that when she felt the first jolt of pain, she could latch on to her unerring trust of me.
Zia offered me her hand, and only with a slight hesitation, I reached forward and grabbed it. “Take a deep breath.”
I breathed in deep through my nose, lungs filling as the first sensation of discomfort stabbed at my side and poked at my ear. Beside me, Hydra shuffled on her legs and through our bond I knew that she was confused about the cause of her pain.
I tried to reassure her through the bond, make her feel that while there was pain, we were not in any danger.
“Doing well so far?”
“Me, yes.” I looked down at Hydra. “Her probably not so much.”
“Don’t worry, we’ll take it slow and we’ll build it up gradually. Just take those deep breaths.” She patted my hand and smiled.
I closed my eyes and let the pain come.
✽✽✽
“How are you doing?” I laid on the thick white carpet, eyes closed from the nausea that the latest too powerful burst of pain Zia sent pulsing through me.
I understood why, since we couldn’t just remain complacent.
“The world keeps spinning round and round. But otherwise fine.” I smiled, patting Hydra idly on the tummy as she mewled by my side.
“Well, you’re not dead at least.” He offered me his hand, and I grabbed it, allowing him to pull me up to a sitting position. When I did, I realized he was a familiar face when I saw the heavily pierced ear.
“You’re Mireyah, aren’t you? I’m Zephyr.”
I twisted to the left to stretch my back and grimaced. “It’s nice to meet you, Zephyr. I grant this might not be the best time.”
“Oh, no problem. Been here, done this and all that. Just wanted to introduce myself since I’ll be partnering you for your Cadre training. If you make it to the Unwanted Lands. Since we share the same powers, I’ll help you with your Majele powers and how to use it doing your duty here.”