by Jason Zandri
“Alone,” she said, tipping her head.
Matthew took a step to walk away, and then stopped short. “Would that be okay with you?” He asked Donna.
“Don’t tell me you need to get your balls out of her purse, Matthew. I thought you were more of a man than that,” Liz said.
“Hey,” Matthew said loudly. “I’m man enough to tell you to stick it up your shaft, Liz. Friends or not, you’re not going to talk to her or me like that.”
Liz’s date stepped in and grabbed Matthew by his dress jacket. “What did you say, asshole?”
“Steve Camp?” Matthew asked. “Sheehan, class of ‘85.”
“What’s it to you?” Steve said, still holding him by the jacket.
“I just figured you could do better than someone still in high school. Can’t drop bait, or do you need to fish in the smaller pond?” Matthew said. “Call your oversized dog back, Liz. You came up to me so you must need something. If he’s going to rough me up, you’re not going to get shit.”
“Let him go,” Liz said.
Matthew straightened out his jacket.
“Asshole,” Steve said and glowered.
“If you’re the baseline, I’m still one step above you,” Matthew said. “Liz, what do you need?”
“Privately,” she said. Then in a softer voice, “Please.”
Matthew turned to Donna, who nodded.
“Apologize to Donna first.”
Liz turned to Donna and sneered. Her face then softened. “I’m sorry. I overstepped.”
A small smile crept across Donna’s face.
“I’ll be less than a minute,” Matthew said.
Matthew stepped away with Liz and stopped a few feet away.
“Holy crap.” Marie pulled Donna off to the side and away from Steve.
“That took balls. I certainly sold Matthew way too short.”
Donna watched him and smiled.
***
“Liz,” Matthew said, stopping short. “I’m not going too far away. What do you need?”
“Not here. Outside.” Liz said.
“No.” Matthew frowned and shook his head. “I’m here on a date, at the homecoming dance no less. I am not going to leave her here to go outside to talk to you. We’re friends; long-term friends. I will back you up, whatever you need, but not at the cost of other people who are just as close to me. So tell me what you need and make it quick.”
“So you admit it,” Liz said, turning and stepping in. “We’re close, you and I?”
“Yes, of course. We’ve known each other since the day I got here, basically.”
Liz leaned in to grab and kiss him, but Matthew blocked her and backed off.
“No, Liz.”
“Come on. I know what you want. I know what you desire. You’ve had a
crush on me forever. Now’s your chance.”
“It’s not the right time.” Matthew looked over at Donna to reassure her.
She flinched, and Matthew held up his hand. “There were plenty of times when I was single—”
“You never pursued,” Liz said, almost pleading.
“You’re like Melissa. You both have some interest, you both know I have feelings for each of you, and you’re both unavailable all the time. I don’t get you girls sometimes. What is it? Guys are fun to toy with? We get the bad rap for leading girls on because we supposedly only want one thing, but boy, it sure is simple for you girls to keep us in the friend zone until it’s not convenient for you, and then it’s somehow all our fault for not being a man and making a move. I made my move, and it was for Donna. At least she was interested in me and not in playing me.”
Matthew turned to walk away just as the song ended. Liz said, “She’ll never be everything you need; there will always be something missing.”
“Maybe she and I can find it together. I don’t think I can find it with you,”
Matthew said.
“And this one goes out to Donna from Matthew. ‘I’m sorry I never got the chance to take you to the premier of Top Gun when it came out in May; it took me the whole summer to get to know you, because it’s like Berlin says
…’” The DJ trailed off and played Take My Breath Away.
Matthew glanced at Liz. “I’ll never have the deep obsession with anyone else that I have with you. Even over my whole life, I’m sure of it. I meant what I said to you before. You’re important to me, and I can’t think of too many things I wouldn’t do for you. But there are limits. There are boundaries I will not cross, even for you.”
Matthew stepped away and back over to Donna. “May I?” he asked, extending his arm.
“Forever, if you want,” she said, tears brimming her eyes.
Matthew looked at Marie, and the disco lights glinted from wetness on her cheeks. Her date gave Matthew a thumbs up. “You’re making me look bad, bro,” he said with a grin. “Nice move.”
Matthew nodded and moved out with Donna to where the other couples danced, and then brought her in close. She rested her head on his shoulder while he wrapped his arms around the small of her back.
“I love you, Matthew,” she said quietly.
Matthew pulled his head back to look down at her. “What?”
“I said, I love you.”
Matthew hesitated for a second, and then pulled her in tight, leaned down, and kissed her.
***
Later, Matthew pulled the car to a stop in Donna’s driveway and shut off the engine. A glance at his watch showed him the time at 11:50, and hustled around to the passenger door to open it for Donna.
She smiled getting out and took his hand when he offered.
“Well, I got you home before midnight, Cinderella,” Matthew said, smiling while he closed the passenger door.
Donna rested her head on his shoulder while they walked to the front entrance. “It’s okay; like I mentioned, my parents left for my grandmother’s already.”
“Right; you’re here with Marcie until the morning.”
The two stopped at the front door, and Donna moved in front of him.
“I had such a memorable time tonight, Matthew.” She looked at his face, and her eyes darted about his features.
“I did too. I detest the dances, but I knew you wanted to go.”
“I don’t want the night to end,” Donna murmured against his chest.
“Well,” he said with another glance at his watch. “It’ll be over in about seven minutes.”
“Come inside.” She fished the front door key out of her tiny purse.
“Is Marcie going to be cool with that? And when are your parents back?”
Matthew asked.
Donna popped the front door open. “My parents left for the weekend.
Marcie’s at her boyfriend’s.”
“Ah,” Matthew said and stepped inside. “When will she be back?” He looked at his watch again, giving away his nerves, while Donna closed and locked the front door.
“After sun-up.” Donna dropped her purse to the floor and kissed him with passion.
Matthew responded and pulled her in tight.
They spent a few moments this way, at the entrance to the house, and then Donna broke away and led him by the hand down the hallway.
Matthew felt uncomfortable when his arousal grew in an awkward position, and he tried to correct it inconspicuously. Donna turned back at that moment and noticed his movement. She stopped just outside her bedroom
and moved to him.
With one arm, she reached up to wrap it around his neck and kissed him again. Then she allowed her free hand to travel downward and touched him over the outside of his dress pants.
Matthew huffed out a short breath, and Donna continued to caress him.
Matthew’s hands drifted down from the small of her back and over her backside. With his left hand in place over her buttocks, he brought his right hand around, up along the outside of her dress, and over her hip and waist.
Then he reached forward and up, and inside her
cleavage.
Donna broke the kiss and dropped her head. With her forehead on his chin, she spoke in a short breath. “Come inside.”
Still touching him, she coaxed him to enter her bedroom.
“Are you sure?” Matthew asked. His head swam, and he had trouble thinking. Marcie coming home, not having a condom with him, not knowing what to do, would anyone know? As fast as the thoughts ripped into his head, they exited for a fresh random thought.
“I am,” she said.
The thought, no condom, came back into his head. It registered. He stopped. “We can’t.”
A look of fear washed over Donna’s face. “Why?” she asked.
“I didn’t bring any protection,” Matthew said.
Donna smiled.
“I’m sorry; I wasn’t planning on anything happening.”
Donna moved closer and reached back down to touch him. “What that tells me is that it wasn’t an important factor for the evening. Being with me and escorting me to the dance was the paramount thing.”
“I’m sorry,” Matthew said. “I’ve never been with anyone, like that. Like this,” he said, his breaths getting short again as she continued to touch him.
“Not even Liz?” she asked with a soft smile.
Matthew backed up, breaking her hold. “What did she say to you?”
“Nothing,” Donna said, shocked by his quick movement away. “She never said the two of you did anything. Funny, you’re about the only thing she’s honest about. She lies and exaggerates about everything else.”
“What did she say?” Matthew asked, looking at her.
Donna hesitated at first but then replied. “On the day at the beach, when you started being forward about being interested … she told me what happened out in the water.”
Matthew took a couple of small steps back. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I’m a little embarrassed that you know that. It’s not common knowledge.”
“I know,” she said and stepped forward. “I don’t care about any of it. I’ve had a fairy tale night,” she whispered. “If I’m extremely lucky over a very long life, how many more of those will I have?” She kissed him again.
Matthew tried to back up, lost his footing, and slipped, falling to the ground. Donna moved lower to meet him and pressed her body over his, and he lay all the way down.
“Prom, too, maybe?” she said, kissing him and moving over him. She hiked up her dress, and the only thing separating them were his dress pants and her thin panties.
“A wedding one day?” She kissed him and ground into him. The material in their clothes left little barrier between them. She moaned as she bore down.
Matthew panted; he went to speak but couldn’t. Donna continued to move against him. She laid into him harder; her breasts pressed hard against his chest. Then she reached up and around with her lips, alternating between kissing his neck and whispering in his ear.
“There are only so many life events that will be nearly flawless.” She ground her hips faster. Her breath came in short gasps. Matthew reached up and put his hands around her waist, trying to lift her. She countered more vigorously.
“Stop, I don’t think I can …” he said
“I know you don’t have a condom; it’s okay,” she whispered. “I’m on the pill. It’s to regulate me. You’ve never been with anyone. Me either.” She breathed into his ear. “We’re safe.” She bore down on him hard and pushed back. “I want to feel all of you, with nothing between us.”
Matthew groaned. Donna flinched, feeling him throbbing through his pants. His breathing came in short bursts, and he closed his eyes.
Donna smiled and laid herself down on his chest and shoulder.
After a couple of moments had passed, Matthew said, “I’m so embarrassed. I’m really sorry.”
“Why?” Donna asked and lifted her head up to look at him.
“You wanted to have this special evening, and I ruined it.”
“It was perfect. I’ll remember it the rest of my life.”
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
The Sanford household buzzed with activity. Mark stepped into the kitchen and stood alongside Karen while her daughters moved about.
“I can’t tell you how much I appreciate this, every year.” Mark took a sip of his beer. “You and Diane stop by each year, and now even Melissa is helping out with all of the food, and you prep it all up; if it weren’t for you girls, Matthew and I would eat turkey sandwiches every Thanksgiving.”
“It’s we that should thank you,” Karen said softly, smiling. “Since the day you and Matthew got involved with us, all of us, our lives have gotten better.”
Mark nodded, trying to take the compliment. “I guess that’s why they call it ‘Thanksgiving.’ Can I help you with anything?”
Diane came over and kissed him. “You can help us by getting out of the way. The kitchen is small, and we need your space.”
He turned to look at Karen, “Will it be like this all the time?”
“When you marry her? I expect it will be just like it is now. With Diane, what you see is what you get.” Karen reached over to touch her daughter’s face.
“What I’ve got is amazing,” he said, smiling. “Well, I guess if getting out of your way is what you want and need, then I will just head downstairs and watch television.”
“Is Matthew down there?” Melissa asked, turning around from the kitchen sink.
“You know,” Mark said, looking back at the door to the basement stairs, and then peering around the corner to the reverse set of stairs that went up to the bedrooms on the second floor. “I don’t know where he went.”
“Why don’t you go see if you can find him,” Karen said to Melissa. “We won’t be ready for at least another hour.”
Melissa smiled and took off her apron.
***
Matthew sat on his bed with the phone to his ear. He peered over to the clock, keeping an eye on the time.
“Look, I love that you called me here,” Donna said. “Over the moon, really. But I need to get going; we’re going to eat soon, and this is going to cost you a small fortune in long-distance charges.”
“It’s okay; you’re worth it,” Matthew said with a smile on his face.
“Do what you’re doing, what you’ve been doing. Spend your time and
attention on me. Save your money.”
“Okay,” he said. “I’m smiling so much my face hurts.”
“Mine too,” Donna said. “I have to go. I love you, Matthew.”
Matthew paused, he opened his mouth to respond. “Look, I—”
“Matthew,” she said. “I know you have trouble saying that. When you’re ready, you’ll tell me. I know what you feel, at least I think I do.”
“How can you know? How do you know I have trouble with it?” Matthew said, and his hand trembled around the handset.
“I spoke with my guidance counselor at school, about some things at home, and the topic of boys came up. I explained some things I was feeling about you to her; she offered me some insight on what to expect—”
“From a boy with no maternal influence. I know; my Dad gets that all the time when he has to discuss things with them regarding me. I’m not some damaged individual, you know.”
“You’re a wonderful man and a caring person, especially in consideration of what you haven’t had in your life. I’m hopeful that someday you’ll trust me fully and share it all. Until then, I will just love you.”
Matthew stayed quiet for a moment, then took a deep breath in and released it. “I don’t know what to say.”
“Then don’t say anything,” she said. “Just go and have a good Thanksgiving Holiday with your family. I will be thinking of you way over here in Groton.”
“Happy Thanksgiving, Donna.”
“You too, Matthew. See you Sunday, maybe?”
“As long as you’re back; yes, definitely.”
“Goodbye; I’ll call you as soon as I get home.”
“Bye.”
“Matthew? It’s Missy; can I come in?”
“Sure,” he said in a hushed tone. “It’s open.”
Melissa walked in, and then closed the door behind her. “It’s going to be a while still before we eat. Were you going to stay up here the entire time?” she asked.
Matthew glanced at her then looked back up to the point of the ceiling he’d been staring at before. “I guess,” he said.
***
Melissa looked over at Matthew’s desk chair, now with a box on it and other items draped over the back.
“Do you ever use the desk?” she asked, trying to get him engaged in some small talk.
“Not really,” he said and closed his eyes. “I do most of my homework in study hall or at the library. What I don’t do there, I do from the office desk at the store.”
Melissa sat next to him on the bed since he lay off-center and to the left.
She looked over at him; he still hadn’t opened his eyes again. She moved her hand to touch him but then pulled it back.
“Penny for your thoughts?” she said.
Matthew peeked one eye open. “How come it’s always ‘a penny for your thoughts,’ but when you’re talking you’re ‘putting your two cents in?’”
Melissa smiled. She hoped he was going to coax himself out or at least let her do it.
“What’s going on?” she asked, reaching over and touching his stomach.
“You’ve been funny all morning.”
“Eh … it’s nothing,” he said, touching her hand and then letting his slouch away to his side. He closed his eyes again.
“Has to be something,” she said and moved her hand on him a little.
“You’re a rock; if something has you off, it’s big.”
Matthew laughed. “You and Michael with that; I am no rock.”
Melissa smiled. At least she got a reaction out of him, and she followed up, “How can anyone see how awesome you are if you can’t see it in yourself? Fine, if that’s the way you want to feel, I’ll leave you to it, but you’ve been off since homecoming.”
“Speaking of which.” Matthew looked over and tipped his head. “You never told me about Homecoming at Sheehan. How was it?”