by Zachary Ryan
Chapter Sixty
Zachary
“Did we seriously need to buy all these dresses?” Cass asked, once we got back to my place and dumped them all over the floor in my bedroom.
I glared at her. “For someone that’s popular, you sure don’t understand the concept of having many outfit changes at prom.”
She rolled her eyes. “This isn’t a stage production.”
I sighed. I just wished nothing more than for Cass to fully understand that any place can be a stage production. People would be jealous of all our outfit changes. It was nice shopping with her. We just chose shoes, dress, and thought of hair styles. It was nice to not think about anything serious for a couple of hours.
We heard a knock at the door. We looked up to see my mom coming in the room. “Oh, I didn’t think you would be home so early,” she said. She looked down at our shopping bags. “You went shopping. I thought you would have had rehearsals.”
“We had the day off. Ms. Rey wanted us to go prom shopping today since we probably won’t have time before opening day.”
“Plus, tickets go on sale tomorrow,” Cass added in.
My mom walked over and sat down on the bed. “Your last prom. I can’t believe we’re finally here,” she said. She grabbed both Cass and I’s hands and pulled us down to sit next to her. “It’s such a magical time.”
Cass and I both looked at each other. My mom really enjoyed talking about the past way more than she should. “Mom, you had a wonderful time that was filled with sex, booze, and youthful fun,” I said.
She turned and slapped me upside the head. “I don’t ruin your trips down memory lane,” she said. I knew there was no heat in her words.
“We’re also not sixty, so we don’t have many memories to think of.”
She stood up. “Zachary Vincent, I’m only in my late forties. I swear, you’re like your father every day,” she said.
Cass and I started laughing, while she stormed out of the room. “Your mom is going to murder you one of these days,” Cass said.
I looked at her. “Don’t worry, it’s going to be because I didn’t do the play.” I groaned at the memory from yesterday. “She had everything planned for when I got to NYU. She thought that I needed to have the lay of the land done before I went there.”
Cass turned, and I looked down most of the ripped posters. My mother didn’t ask me what happened. She brushed it under the rug. I usually had a meltdown before, and she assumed it was one of those times. Too bad this time there wasn’t going to be opening day.
“Are you going to tell her you didn’t do the play?” she asked.
I stood up and pulled out one of the dresses from the bags. It was a golden dress with a slit up the front and an exposed back. “I think this would be perfect for an entrance to prom. It will have everyone talking,” I said with a wink.
Cass looked at me. “Why are you avoiding my question?” she asked.
I turned to look at her. “Why haven’t you told us that you and Jarele broke up?” I replied, back with a question.
She picked up a bag with a black dress in it. “I don’t know if this should be my entrance look, or if I should do something else. I’m very conflicted.”
I knew she was avoiding her question also, and that was how we were going to survive until graduation. We would ignore all the deep questions and finally have some fun in our lives. I knew Cass and the rest of the group cared for me, but we worked well because we kept a healthy distance between each other. We opened the door to our homes just enough to get to know each other, but we hid all the darkness behind that door. It was what we would do until we walked across the aisle to get our diplomas. I just prayed all of us wouldn’t crack before then, but I had a feeling with our luck, our darkness would burst through that door and expose itself all on its own.
Chapter Sixty-One
Ben
I walked the halls and all I saw were prom ticket posters. Tickets went on sale today, and people were excited about it. Girls couldn’t wait to be asked, and guys were dreading having to buy a tux.
I walked up to Chet as he was asking Kate to prom. Max was standing there recording the whole thing. I rolled my eyes. Of course, they were all about having their audience know about the prom proposal. He kept it cute and sweet with roses bursting out of her locker.
She kissed him as she said yes and everyone clapped. Max turned off the camera. I clapped and walked up to them. “I can’t believe you two are going to prom. I would have never guessed it.”
Chet nudged me. “Always trying to ruin the fun.” I saw the love in his eyes for Kate, and it was something that I hoped I found down the line.
“I’m going to talk to my friends really quick. I’ll be right back,” Kate said, before walking away.
“I need to get to the computer lab myself.” Max smiled. “I’ll see you guys later.” He walked away leaving Chet and me.
“I can’t believe she’s with me. I’m not someone that great, but she sees something good in me. She doesn’t see me as some stupid popular douchebag.”
“Even though you are one,” I said.
He looked at me. “I have my moments, but we’ve become stronger since the shooting,” he said.
It made me think of the night at the poker game. I still couldn’t get what those guys were saying about being with Chet and Kate outside of the school during the shooting.
“Crazy to think that. Where were you again during it?” I asked.
“The cafeteria. You know how hungry I get in the morning,” I said. “Sorry, I need to go get a math book from my locker,” he said, before running off.
I looked at him in a weird way. I also felt like he was hiding something. I pulled out my phone and clicked on the video where Chet and Kate talk about the shooting.
It was them at Kate’s house at her kitchen table. They talked about the shooting and wanted to answer some questions. Chet looked at Kate and then the camera. “We were in the gym at the time we heard about the shooting. We heard screams and people telling us there was an active shooter.”
I looked up to see Kate coming towards me. I paused the video and took out my headphones. I didn’t want to think too much into it right then because maybe they were lying in the video. They wouldn’t lie about being at the school during the shooting, would they?
I smiled at Kate. “Chet went to his locker to grab a math book or something.”
She rolled her eyes. “He’s not even taking math.” She shrugged. “Regardless, I wanted to talk to you personally.”
“Why?” I asked. Kate never wanted to talk to me privately.
“My friend Maria thinks you're cute, and you should ask her to prom.”
“Why?”
“Because, I’m planning to get a limo for prom, and it would be cute if you go with her. I’m forcing Max to ask Jessica to prom.”
I nodded. “Ahh, and Maria doesn’t want to be the fifth wheel.”
“Why are you being such an ass? Does the great Ben Howard not date?” she asked. “You haven’t dated anyone since Lynn Carlson sophomore year.”
Lynn Carlson was a quiet junior that we shared photography class together. She was someone that was nice and innocent. There was something about her that made me really want to get to know her. She was the first person I actually opened up to.
I took her home to meet my parents one night. My mother pulled me into a room and told me that I couldn’t date her. She told me that I needed to focus on my studies. I remember arguing with her because I really liked her. My mother instantly shut it down saying that it didn’t matter. I had to focus on my future, and she would bring me down.
My mother made me break up with her, and it destroyed both of us. I found out later that my mom didn’t like that Lynn comes from a broken home and that her parents didn’t have significant jobs in my grandfather’s eyes. She wouldn’t bring prestige to the Howard name.
“That was a quick fling,” I said.
“Or maybe
, you don’t want anyone to get close. You’re going with her. I’m not taking no for an answer. Everyone should have a date to prom,” she said. She turned and walked away from me.
I turned to look at the stupid prom ticket poster. I remembered the night I broke Lynn’s heart. It was the day before tickets for Junior-Senior prom went out.
I got to her house. I saw the excitement on her face when I opened the door. I knew she thought I was going to ask her to prom. We had just had dinner with my parents. All the signs were there. “You mean, the world to me, Lynn.” I grabbed her hand. “I’ve loved everything about our time together, but I need to end it.” My voice began to break.
“What do you mean, you’re breaking up with me?” she asked, after I explained I had to end it.
“My parents don’t want me to date. My parents think that you’ll be a distraction.”
I could see the heartbreak on her face. She slapped me across the face. “I hate you, Benjamin Howard. I opened my heart to you. I gave you my virginity.”
I was angry. “I did the same with you. You weren’t some game or conquest. You meant the world to me. You don’t think this kills me, too? I don’t want to end either, but it’s my parents and family. I explained all this to you.”
She shook her head. “Doesn’t change anything. You should have fought for us. You were the first person to make me feel special, and you promised you’d keep doing that.” She stepped backwards and slammed the door in my face.
I shook my head trying to get Lynn’s broken face out of my head. I knew she wanted me to fight, but I was barely sixteen. There was nothing that I could do to fight back on their decision.
She didn’t speak or notice me until she graduated. I knew I broke her heart, but my parents broke mine. I knew from that moment forward that I couldn’t let anyone else in. I flirted and kept everyone at a distance. My parents couldn’t know if someone was meaningful, or they would take them out of my life.
I groaned at the poster. I grabbed it to rip it down. “Stupid prom.” I crumbled it up and threw it away. I would never admit that I did want to go to prom and dance with someone that meant something to me. I wanted to look at photos down the road and think about how some stupid dance was one of the most important days of my life.
Chapter Sixty-Two
Ben
I kept watching Chet and Kate’s video over and over again at work. It had been a slow afternoon, and I had nothing else to do. It was quiet usually on the weekday afternoons, and I was asked to cover for Chloe last minute. I had no problem with it, because she had been letting me go to a lot of her parties lately. It was nice to connect with real people, and I felt like I was being taken under their wing. It was refreshing having people get to know me and not Ben Howard.
“Why would he lie?” I asked, after the video had ended.
“You know damn well your friends have never been good people,” Gabe said.
I looked up to see him standing there. I rolled my eyes. I didn’t know why he didn’t leave me alone. “You need to let it go,” I said.
“Even my mother told you to stay away from them,” he said.
I remember one time after school, when I was hanging out with Chet and his gang. Candice had come to pick up Gabe, and she had seen me goofing around with them. We were being stupid high school boys, and I didn’t think anything of it. We were making fun of a freshman that walked by, and I saw Candice staring at me.
She had a look of sheer disappointment on her face. I looked at Chet. “I got to go,” I said. I stood up and walked away before they could say anything else. I walked over to Candice. She didn’t say anything at first, and I felt the need to stand up for my actions. “We’re just being stupid kids. There’s nothing you need to worry about,” I said.
“I didn’t say you had to make a reasoning for your actions, but I want you to know the ripple effect of them. That kid is probably going to go home and cry his eyes out.” She looked past me toward Chet and them. “Do you honestly want to be surrounded with those types of people,” she said.
“It’s high school. You get peer pressured by your friends.”
“I don’t see Gabe, Lane, Zachary, or Cass forcing you to make fun of people when you hang out with them.”
“That’s different. They’re my friends, but…” I let the thought go because I didn’t know how to describe them. We had been friends for over two years now, and we did our own thing. We still ran in our own social circles, but we still hung out as our own friends. It was a break from high school politics.
“High school is a dangerous place. You let people influence you so much during this time. I know you mean well, but you shouldn’t be caught up with them. Toxic people have a way of bringing out the worst in people, do you want that?” she asked.
I wanted to tell her to mind her own business, but it was nice actually having a mother that cared for me. I shook my head. “No, I don’t.”
She reached over and squeezed my hand. “You’re going to soon learn that popularity is all bullshit at the end of the day. You have true friends, and you shouldn’t turn your back on them. I do hope you realize this before you lose them,” she said.
“You kept your friendships, and you lost me,” Gabe said, bringing me back to the present.
I looked at him. “I didn’t lose you because I chose my friends. I lost you because you kept your true colors to yourself,” I said.
I didn’t give him a chance to say anything, because the door to the bar had opened. I turned the corner to greet them, when I felt like my heart had jumped out of my chest. Chet was standing there with Brick and Tyler
Chet pulled up his phone and took a quick picture of me in my serving outfit. “I would like a seat. Where’s the best view?” he asked. “Will you be my server?”
I stormed towards Chet. I hated his smug smile right then. “How the fuck did you find out?” I asked. I hadn’t really posted on social media about me being here. I didn’t even add people from work on my social media, so I wouldn’t be tied to this place.
Chet smirked. “You hadn’t been hanging around much lately. I thought you were banging some girl, and you didn’t want to tell us.” He pulled out one of my work shirts from his book bag. “You had dropped this one day after gym, and I thought it was rather strange. You had never mentioned this place before,” he chuckled. “I thought the bitch worked here, but I guess you’re the bitch that works here.”
I surged forward and pushed Chet against the wall. “I’ll beat the shit out of you right now,” I said.
He still had the stupid smirk on his face. “And let your squeaky-clean image go down the drain. Do you really want me to tell everyone about the golden boy working at some dive bar in the city?”
I didn’t want it to get out, and I knew that it would kill my power and reputation at school. There was nothing wrong with having a job, but I wasn’t supposed to have one. I dropped my arms and backed up. “So, you’re going to blackmail me?” I asked.
He shrugged. “I mean, why wouldn’t I tell everyone about this, Ben? You’re the one that’s always been the most popular and powerful of our school. It would be so exciting for everyone to see the great fall of Benjamin Howard, especially before we all graduate. This is quite the scandal.”
I knew he was right. People would be talking about this for weeks, and I didn’t want that to be my legacy. I needed to make sure that he kept his mouth shut when it came to this. “If you wanted a scandal, then maybe this will work,” I said.
I pulled up the picture that I stole from Lane’s phone. I raised my phone and showed Chet the photo of Lane and Colby kissing. “Why expose my secret when this is way juicier?” I asked.
I had to protect myself. I had nothing else in my life at the moment. My money and power were gone. My reputation was the only thing that I had left going for me. I couldn’t be known as the kid that had fallen from grace. I had to continue being Ben Howard for the outside world. I couldn’t lose that, and I wouldn’t l
ose that because I was stupid one time. I knew that Lane could handle it. He had so much going for him. He could survive three weeks of torture, right?
Chet looked at Brick and Tyler then at me. He chuckled. “You really know how to amaze me sometimes,” he said as he took the phone. I knew he was sending himself the photo. “I can’t believe you would do this to your own friend,” he said. He tossed me the phone. “But then again, you only focus on yourself.”
“What are you going to do with it?” I asked.
“Why does it matter to you?” he asked. “Your secret is safe.” He turned to walk out with Brick and Tyler.
I let go a heavy sigh. I leaned against the bar top. I had just saved my ass, but then the guilt came in. I just threw one of my best friends under the bus, and I had no clue what Chet was going to do with that information.
I looked up to see Gabe standing there looking at me with sheer disappointment. “And you just lost Lane,” he said, and I knew in my whole heart that I had finally agreed with something he said.
Chapter Sixty-Three
Zachary
I was grabbing books out of my locker when someone came over and slammed my locker shut. It was Marylyn with her glorious smugness.
I looked at her and rolled my eyes. “What do you want?” I asked.
“For someone who didn’t try at auditions, you seem pretty invested in our play. I thought you were above it all,” she said.
“I might think I’m better than the play, but I can still be interested to see how it goes.” I was craving to get on that stage and show this bitch.
She laughed. “Please, you’re like a stalker ex. The play rejected you, and you’re trying to play the oh poor me role. You didn’t get the role because you suck.”