by Lexi Ryan
Mom heads to the sunny alcove to dance with Noah, and Molly shifts her gaze to me. “I hope you don’t mind me bringing him in. I wanted to spend a little time with him before I have to go house hunting. I didn’t think anyone else would be here.”
“I don’t mind at all.” I shove my hands into my pockets. “House hunting?”
“Rental hunting, at least. There isn’t much available in my budget. After looking at them online, I’m not very hopeful.” With a sigh, she shrugs. “Can’t hurt to look, right?”
“Right.” I follow her gaze to where Mom is doing her best funky chicken. Noah laughs so hard that he drops to the floor in delight. “Let me know how I can help.”
She shakes her head. “It’ll be fine. We’ve been through worse.”
I know it’s true, but that doesn’t mean I like it.
Some of the worry on her face fades as she studies her son. “Come on, Noah. We have to get going.”
The boy folds his arms and pouts. “Aww! Why, Mom?”
“Because Veronica’s waiting.”
He lights up at the mention of his babysitter and races across the room to his mom.
“I’ll lock it all up on my way out,” I say.
Molly nods, then calls to my mom, “It was good to see you, Kathleen.”
“And you too, Molly,” Mom says. “Bye, Noah.”
“Good luck,” I say, watching Molly and her son leave through the back.
“Bye, Rayden!” Noah calls over his shoulder.
I don’t even notice Mom’s moved until she’s standing at my side. “She’s a lovely woman,” she says softly.
“I know.”
“And a good mom.”
I nod. “That she is.”
“And she looks at you like you walk on water.”
I frown. Mom sees what she wants to see. “Resist the urge to set me up, please.”
Mom just laughs and shakes her head, walking back to the tasting room. “I’m hungry, Brayden. Could I talk you into taking an old lady to lunch?”
Molly
“I’m so sorry,” Teagan says, frowning into her beer.
“Why are you apologizing?” I drain a quarter of my beer in one pull and sigh. It’s been a long afternoon spent looking at the best rental homes and apartments Jackson Harbor has to offer. It turns out that Noah’s Santa-friendly chimney requirement is the least of my concerns, because 1) hardly anything is available right now, and 2) my budget is laughable in this town. “You warned me it’d be slim pickings.”
“That doesn’t mean I wasn’t hoping that one of them might have been a hidden gem. Sometimes they look worse in the pictures, but the potential is clear when you see them in person.”
“Sadly, none of these. If anything, I should apologize to you. You wasted an afternoon off work.”
“Oh, I had my own selfish reasons,” she says. “I have a perfectly good alarm and don’t need a four-year-old bunking with me and waking me up at ungodly hours.”
I laugh. “I promise Noah and I won’t be crashing at your place. That’s what hotels are for.”
Teagan frowns, and I know she’s no happier about that potential solution than I am.
Today was hard. When I woke up this morning, I had to fight an old heaviness to get through my normal routine. Life should feel easier. We buried my asshole stepfather almost two months ago, and I finally don’t have to worry about him finding out about my son. My stepbrother, Colton, is out of rehab, and I’m preparing for the very first event at the Jackson Brews banquet hall. Despite my looming homelessness, everything is amazing. And yet I woke up this morning feeling the old ache of loneliness gnawing at my bones, and it hasn’t let go all day.
Jake emerges from the kitchen. He’s in such a good mood that he’s damn near swaggering. “Smile, ladies,” he says, leaning on the edge of the bar opposite us. “It’s snowing. We’ve got beer. Life is good.”
I’m not in much of a smiling mood, but I can’t help but obey when I realize he’s wearing one of the new Jackson Brews T-shirts. As I suspected, Brayden’s the only one who doesn’t think it’s funny.
“Easy for you to say,” Teagan says. “You’re not going to be homeless at Christmas like poor Molly here.”
Jake grimaces as he turns his attention to me. “Shit. I’m an ass. I forgot.”
I roll my eyes. “She makes it sound like Noah and I are going to spend our Christmas sleeping beneath the overpass and huddled around a burning trash barrel. We’ll be okay.” That’s what I keep reminding myself—it’s not ideal, but it’s okay. We’re always okay, my boy and I. This is nothing but another bump in the road that’s turned Noah into the most awesome tiny human I know.
“Hey!” Teagan nudges me with her elbow. “Don’t ruin a perfectly good guilt trip.”
“No luck finding a place?” Jake asks.
I shake my head. “Maybe I’m too picky, but . . .”
“I saw there’s a small house on Crawford for rent,” he says. “It’s close to the park.”
I stifle a shudder at the memory of the rat-infested two-bedroom on the east side of town. “Saw it. Hard pass.”
Ava comes out from the kitchen, smoothing her skirt down around her baby bump. If Jake’s long stare at his new wife didn’t give away what they were doing back there before Jake emerged in a suspiciously cheerful mood, Ava’s flushed cheeks would. The new husband and wife can’t keep their hands off each other, and her pregnancy hasn’t seemed to slow them down at all.
A tug of longing rips through my gut, sudden and unexpected. My pregnancy was long, lonely, and wrought with too many fears for the future. Noah was worth every bit of it, but to get the joy of a child without all those moments of terror and self-doubt . . .
I push my envy aside and paste on a smile. Wishing I’d had just a little of what she has doesn’t change that I want it for her or how happy I am that she and Jake finally found their way to each other.
“What are you all talking about?” Ava asks.
“Molly was house hunting today.” He waves to someone in one of the back booths. “There’s nothing good available.”
The next thing I know, Brayden’s standing beside me at the bar. Brayden, who was so sweet with his mom at the banquet center this morning. Brayden, who wasn’t annoyed at all to see I brought my wild child into the office, but instead lit up at the sight of Noah running through the place. I didn’t realize he was here.
“How’d the house hunt go?” he asks.
“Bad,” Jake says.
“The place on Crawford was actually pretty nice,” Teagan says. “If you don’t mind rats.”
Jake mimes puking into his hand.
“I was hoping you’d get lucky.” Brayden scans my face like I’ve been in some awful accident and he’s looking me over for injuries. “Are you okay?”
“We’ll be fine.” Dear Lord, if I have to take one more pitiful, sympathetic stare aimed in my direction, I might lose it. Those looks make me feel like I’m six again and being told my father isn’t coming home. I hate pity. I’d prefer a high school full of assholes calling me Blowjob Molly to even a handful of people feeling sorry for me.
“What kind of guy kicks his tenants out before Christmas?” Anger twists Ava’s normally smiling face. “Did he really just now find out his niece needs a place to stay?”
“Who knows?” I shrug. I’m too ashamed to admit what I believe to be the real reason behind my sudden eviction. “Maybe I can make it up to Noah and find a hotel with an indoor pool.”
“The hotel on the interstate has a pool. A slide, even,” Jake says.
Brayden shakes his head. “Didn’t they shut down for some sort of asbestos removal?”
I grimace and take a deep breath. “Somewhere else, then. There are plenty of vacation homes in this town. Surely one of them has the holiday available.” I can already feel my credit card groaning at the possibility of paying holiday rates to stay in a Jackson Harbor vacation rental.
“Why don’t you just stay at B
rayden’s?” Ava asks.
I stiffen at that, and Brayden stills beside me—just enough of a reaction that I understand exactly how he feels about that possibility. “Don’t be ridiculous,” I say, trying to wave away the words like she never spoke them—because I’d prefer that to the awkwardness that’s settled between my boss and me.
“He’s in that big house all alone,” Jake says. He turns to his brother. “You probably wouldn’t even notice Molly and Noah were there.”
I’m surrounded by crazy people.
I’m pretty sure all the Jacksons know that Brayden and I hooked up in New York last spring. Secrets are a rare commodity in this family. Given that, you’d think it would occur to someone that it’s not a great idea to put us under the same roof.
“The whole reason you didn’t sign a lease with Tom was because you were looking for a house to buy, right?” Ava asks. “If you just move in with Brayden temporarily, you don’t have to worry about finding a place to stay until a house comes on the market.”
“It would be ideal,” Teagan says softly, breaking her silence, but from the way she’s looking at me, I feel like she understands why this “ideal” solution would also be complicated in ways I don’t want to admit out loud.
I meet Ava’s eyes, trying my best to silently communicate that this is a bad idea. Am I the only one who’s noticed how still Brayden has gone? God, he’s probably desperately trying to come up with a polite way to take Ava’s naïve offer off the table.
I do it before he can. “I wouldn’t intrude like that.”
“We don’t want you to spend your Christmas at a hotel,” Jake says.
Ava chimes in, oh so helpfully, “The last thing you need is a vacation rental gobbling up your hard-earned down payment, should you finally find a house you want. Staying at Brayden’s is a logical solution. And since you could put all your rent money into savings, you’ll be that much closer to buying your own home.”
“Noah and I will find our own place.”
Ava leans forward on the bar, her expression serious. “The Jacksons are going to drag you and Noah to the cabin with them anyway, and every other family event they have. It’s their—our way,” she says, seeming to remember that she’s a Jackson now too. “There’s room for everyone, whether you want them to make room for you or not.”
“And it’s really sweet.” I keep my eyes on Ava. I can feel Brayden watching me, but I don’t want to see what’s in his eyes. “It really is, but it’s unnecessary.”
Making an excuse about needing to get Noah, I pay my tab and hurry out of the bar before they can subject me to any further attempts to convince me, and before Brayden’s silence can slice into me any further.
The truth is that the idea of sleeping under the same roof as my boss and seeing him when I wake up every morning . . . I don’t want to put on my mom hat and go retrieve my son. I want to put on my sexiest underwear and start drinking.
No matter how tempted I am to sleep with Brayden, I shouldn’t, and I especially shouldn’t plop myself right in front of that temptation at the loneliest time of the year.
Brayden
The door has barely closed behind Molly, and I’m still thinking about the way her hips sway in that fitted black skirt, when my sister-in-law smacks me on the shoulder. “You jackass!”
I gape at Ava’s uncharacteristic outburst and look to Jake for some backup, but my brother just glares at me. “What the hell did I do?”
Jake’s brows shoot up into his hairline, and Ava mimes pulling out her hair.
Teagan hops off her barstool and shakes her head. “I’m staying out of this.” She swings her purse over her shoulder. “Have a good night.”
“Staying out of what?” I ask.
But she just whispers, “Good luck,” and heads out the door.
“Ugh.” Ava scowls at me, turns on her heel, and stomps back into the kitchen, growling, “I’m too hormonal for this crap!” as the swinging door swishes in her wake.
Jake cuts his eyes in the direction of his wife’s retreat before his sympathetic gaze turns to me. “I didn’t mean to corner you like that. I just assumed you’d agree.”
“Corner me?” I must be slow as shit today, because I finally realize why Ava’s mad at me. I drag a hand through my hair. “I don’t care if Molly and Noah stay with me.” It’s a moot point, isn’t it? The look on Molly’s face at the suggestion screamed that she’d rather eat glass. And hell, she’s made it clear where we stand. Our night together was a mistake. I’m her boss and nothing more. She wants to forget we ever crossed those lines. I’ve been working damn hard to check all those boxes for her.
“If you don’t care, then why didn’t you say something?” Jake asks.
I scowl at my brother. “Did it ever occur to you that you were putting her in an uncomfortable position? That maybe she doesn’t want to stay with me?”
Ava’s shout from the kitchen is loud enough to be heard through the whole bar. “You still could have said something.”
Jake bites back a smile at his wife’s outburst.
I roll my shoulders. Ava’s as sweet as they come, and I don’t like her ire directed at me. “I didn’t realize my silence was a problem when I knew she’d likely prefer a different solution.” I lower my voice so Ava can’t hear me in the back. “Come on, you can’t tell me you don’t see this as Ava’s blatant attempt to play matchmaker.” Never mind the ideas such an arrangement would put in Mom’s head. Jesus—Molly and Noah living with me. Mom would love that.
Ava returns from the kitchen with a plate of fries, but her pout tells me I’m not forgiven.
Jake shrugs. “Maybe, but I’m not sure there’s a better solution. She and Noah would have to camp in the nursery if they moved in with Ava and me. She could stay with Levi, I guess.”
Ava smacks her husband on the arm. “Seriously? Ellie and Molly are only recently on friendly terms after the whole ordeal with Colton. There’s no way Molly would move in with Levi when it would raise brows, and people would gossip about Molly and Levi being together.”
Jake frowns. “Everyone knows Levi’s in love with Ellie.”
Ava shrugs. “People can be assholes who are much more interested in a juicy story than they are in the truth. Molly knows that better than anyone. And anyway, let’s not put any obstacles between Ellie and Levi reuniting.”
“Agreed,” I mutter. Ellie and Levi are taking some time apart after a messy ordeal that involved Ellie losing her memory and Levi falling hard for his best friend’s girl. We all know it’s only a matter of time before she lets herself be with him, but he’s giving her the space she asked for. Inserting Molly into that is a terrible idea.
“Shay would happily take her, but the three of them in that little apartment?” Jake shakes his head. “I guess Nic and Ethan could move Mom to the guest room upstairs and let Molly and Noah have her apartment behind Ethan’s garage.”
Ava squeaks in protest, and I glare at Jake. “Mom isn’t moving anywhere. That’s unnecessary.” I don’t have to say the rest out loud—that I don’t like the idea of her climbing the steps at Ethan’s all the time, that even though she’s recovered from chemo and is officially in remission, she’s still weaker than she was before and wears out easily. She broke her ankle in a fall last summer and gave us all a scare. No way I’d risk adding a broken hip to our worries.
Jake nods. “I guess Carter might be able to—”
“Shut the fuck up before I knock you out.”
Jake presses a hand to his chest, feigning innocence. “I’m so sorry. Is there a reason you don’t want your beautiful employee living with your flirt of a single brother?” He makes a face as he scratches the back of his neck. “Because I could have sworn you told me you weren’t interested in her like that anymore.”
I said I didn’t intend to pursue anything with Molly. Never that I wasn’t interested. But I’m not about to point out the difference to Jake when he’s dead set on making me feel like an ass. “I’l
l make it clear she’s welcome to stay with me, but I’m telling you now she’d probably rather risk the rats at that Crawford Street rental than have to sleep in the same house as me.”
Jake’s lips twitch. “If you say so.”
Molly
“With the ice festival, it’s considered peak season. You’d be surprised how many people want to spend their holiday in Jackson Harbor.”
I pinch the bridge of my nose and count to five. I’ve had this conversation half a dozen times today in my attempts to negotiate better rates on vacation properties. “I understand. I just thought that if I were staying a month or two . . .”
“If you pay two months upfront, I can offer a ten percent discount,” the woman says. “But that’s the best I can do.”
Two months at these rates would be like a wrecking ball to the meager savings I’ve scraped together since moving here. I have a good job, but too many months living in New York unemployed put me in a hole I haven’t fully climbed out of. “Let me think on it. I’ll call you back tomorrow.”
“Okay. I’m sorry I don’t have better news, but the owners don’t mind it being vacant over the holiday. They enjoy hopping over from the city for a night or two when they can, so they’re not very motivated to lower the price.”
“I understand.” I swallow. Spending Christmas in a hotel room is looking more and more inevitable. “I’ll be in touch.”
We end the call, and I close my eyes and take two deep breaths. Maybe Jackson Harbor has made me soft. I’ve dealt with much bigger blows than pre-holiday relocation. I can certainly handle this.
But I’m far too aware that I haven’t broken the news to Noah yet, and maybe I should have. Instead, I’ve decided I’ll wait until I know exactly where we’re heading at the end of the week. I don’t want to make any more promises I can’t keep.
I shut down my computer, grab my purse, and head out. I have an appointment with a guy who’s trying to sell his house on contract. It’s the last possibility between me and Christmas in either a hotel or on Mom’s couch.