by Nicole Vidal
After spilling one of my deepest, darkest secrets to Cash, I feel a bit lighter. It’s not as if I was hiding it; he knew my parents died. However, he certainly didn’t know all the facts. Thankfully, we flew here on a private jet, so my extraordinary amount of luggage won’t be a problem.
As we take our seats, Cash interlaces his fingers with mine and presses his lips to the top of my hand.
“Please tell me, Cash.”
He simply shakes his head before speaking. Probably because I can read him as well as he can read me. I know his brain is working out an issue or a problem by the look in his eyes. “I can’t possibly imagine how the last decade has been for you without your parents. Mine may be difficult, but at least they are here.”
“Thank you. Keep going.”
“How many birthdays have you not celebrated at all?” he asks. He has a plan, no doubt.
I consider his question. “Four, I think.”
“Will you make a deal with me?”
“I’ll hear you out.”
“Fair enough. I would like to celebrate with you for four hours today. I agree to set aside six o’clock this evening for remembering your parents. We can set that hour aside every year for the rest of our lives if you want, but we should celebrate you as well.”
Either Kate told him the time or he read it in the clippings in the box from my closet. I appreciate the effort.
“What do these four hours look like to you?”
“Once we get home, I would like to get you a meal and maybe a cake. I would love for you to share some of the memories that your brothers have shared or one of your own. Perhaps you would be willing to peek at your gift.”
Before answering, I consider the huge step he is asking me to take, along with all the others we plan to take together. “Can we start smaller? Say two hours for me and one for them.”
“We can.”
“‘Thank you’ doesn’t cover what I need you to hear. I have never shared this truth with anyone. I never wanted to. No one truly ever saw me before you.” I lean over to kiss him tenderly.
He brushes the single tear away with the pad of his thumb. “I will move a mountain for you, tesoro.”
My heart clenches in my chest. I unbuckle us and lead Cash to the couch to curl up in his arms.
Luckily, Cash drove the Rover to the airport on Friday. These boxes wouldn’t fit in the car. We made a stop at a small bakery on the way home. I opt for pizza instead of eating out. The knot in my stomach keeps getting tighter as we get closer to home. The sheer terror of the notion that I will celebrate today makes me nauseous.
We move the boxes up to the lobby and then into the elevator with Arthur’s help. Cash orders the food before we set the boxes into the guest room. I’ll go through them and move clothes as I need them. I sorted them as I packed and labelled each box. I won’t need my shorts much longer as fall is rapidly approaching.
All the mantras from therapy keep resurfacing. You can do this. They would want you to be happy. Life goes on. The list is endless. All sage words no matter which way you look at it. I steel myself and resolve to handle these three hours. Next year, I’ll do four if this goes well.
The food arrived just a few minutes ago, and we sit on the terrace and eat. The pepperoni pizza quells the nausea a bit. Wherever we move must have an amazing outdoor space like this one.
“Will you tell me a memory that Nicholas has shared with you?”
“Yes, but when did you start calling my brother Nicholas?”
“I talked to him last Saturday.” He lets his words hang, probably expecting me to lash out.
“Nicholas only texted to check on me. You made a deal with him, didn’t you?”
“Depends. Will you be angry if I did?”
“Not necessarily.”
“I knew he would learn about the photographers, so I reached out to prevent him from sending Maia or Connor without at least hearing you out first.”
“He texted but didn’t mention anything. Apparently, you got through to him. You didn’t answer my question.”
“By calling and risking your wrath, his words, I basically put it out there that I love you. He indicated that he trusts me and that I should call him Nicholas.”
I nod and share Nicholas’s favorite memory of our Labrador digging up my mother’s garden and our failure of reconstructing it.
“How do you normally remember your parents today?”
“I usually spend most of the day alone and quiet.”
“Do you want me to go, or can I sit here with you for at least the next hour,” he says in a whisper, opening his arms to me. I snuggle into his warm body and steal every ounce of comfort he’s offering me. I would never ask him to go.
Cash chose a chocolate cake with a Nutella mousse filling. I don’t recall telling him chocolate is my flavor of choice. Just past seven, with one candle to symbolize starting birthday celebrations over, I make a wish for the first time in a decade.
“What would you like to do now?” he asks as we clean the dishes.
“Thank you for holding me up today. It may not seem like much, but I made noteworthy progress today. Please don’t take my next statement personally. It’s about me. I can’t accept your gift today. I can’t balance getting gifts with the loss I still feel.”
Rounding the island, Cash pulls me into his arms. “Whatever you need.”
I decide to call it a night.
41
Cassius
While this weekend wasn’t exactly how I planned. I took the curveball and went with it. It’s unfathomable that her parents died on her birthday. To make matters worse, they were out getting a cake. The pain in her eyes is unbearable. I never saw it before yesterday. When she mentioned the anniversary was coming, I wasn’t prepared for this level of sorrow.
Noelle’s response is vastly different from Sam’s loss. Sam retreated and has yet to fully come out again. I see any time she’s willing to focus on herself as a win. The time to reflect on her parents is important. Allowing me to get her a birthday cake was a gigantic step. I’m grateful she let me to do it. They may not be here, but they have profoundly affected her world view and how deeply she loves. Thankfully, she loves me.
After dropping Noelle off at work, I stroll into my office and take my messages from Myles. I have emails from Mallory, Stacy, and Jimmy. I’ll handle Jimmy’s questions after I pick up Noelle from Mrs. Waller’s.
“Hey, Mal,” I say as she steps into my office. Face-to-face works just as well, I suppose.
“Hi, Cash. How was your weekend?”
“Good. Yours?”
“I was going through Noelle’s information and noticed a discrepancy on her paperwork.”
“What?”
“She listed her home address as California. I thought she lived with you.” I exhale silently. It isn’t that I distrust Noelle. Momentarily, I was worried this error could affect her new business endeavor.
“Just habit would be my guess. She just moved in with me permanently last week.” I don’t need to explain the changes that have occurred in the last few weeks. “Is that all?”
“Yes. I gather she has her first client set up. Good for her.”
“She does. Thank you for working with her. Taking this leap was a big deal for her.”
“You’re welcome.” Mal hurries away after her cell rings, and Myles announces that Stacy is early for our appointment.
I indicate that I need a few minutes before the meeting. I need to settle my nerves. All the pieces of my life are starting to fall into place, and I couldn’t be happier.
“Good morning, Stacy. How are you and Jocelyn?”
“Morning. We’re doing well. Let’s get this started. She and I have a meeting with a potential birth mother this afternoon.”
“That’s wonderful. I hope it’s the perfect match.”
He nods. “There are two distinct parts to this deal. First, Graham Edson is the majority shareholder of Edson Avionics. He answers to
a board comprised of his four children. They own the balance of 24 percent of the company. They have signed off on the sale. He’s looking to sell his 60 percent stake of Pemberton Airlines, and he has accepted your purchase offer. However, he refuses to expedite the timeline and the closing is set for January 15.”
While I hoped he would be amenable to an expedited time frame, I prepared for him to balk at that part of my offer. I want his shares of Pemberton.
“Here are the preliminary reports. I didn’t find anything that concerns me other than the time frame. I don’t see a legitimate reason why he wouldn’t expedite the sale.” Stacy hands me a box full of documents.
“He’s thorough. I’ll give him that. And the second part?”
“Second you asked me to look into the minority owner of Pemberton. Cecil Elliott is an older gentleman who owns the remaining 40 percent of Pemberton Airlines. He would like to meet with you in person to discuss your terms.”
“Do you see that as a good thing or bad thing?”
“All the information I could find on Mr. Elliott leads me to believe he’s old school. Prefers to deal face-to-face rather than via email.”
“Okay, did he give you times he’s available?”
Stacy nods and hands me a list of open appointments and Mr. Elliott’s assistant’s contact info.
“I’ll set this up today. Thank you for your help on this. I don’t trust anyone else with our life.”
“Our?” Stacy asks with keen interest in my use of pronoun.
“Yes, our.”
“She’s good for you. I’m happy for you. I’ll miss you here and in the ring.”
I reply in kind, and Stacy leaves me with a stack of paperwork to review and a meeting to schedule. Before clearing off my desk for the day to pick up Noelle, I reach out to Nicholas regarding security for the gala and a consultation request with Jacob for our new home, wherever that may be. I will share my news with my siblings after I meet with Mr. Elliott.
On the ride home, Noelle and I discuss Jimmy’s questions and our responses. While I drive, she types out the answers on my phone. For some reason, there is traffic today.
Rather than slave away in my cozy home office, I opt to work on the terrace. Noelle is finishing up some things for her new client, including a call with the director of his school and a second referral, this one from the director of Mason’s school. My plan is fine until Noelle decides to catch some rays, clad in her red bikini, her long tresses piled atop her head, and huge sunglasses. I’m no longer focused on the reports cast before me. Instead, I’m focused on her toned abdomen moving rhythmically as she breathes and the curve of her heavy breasts straining against the thin fabric.
“Do you need me to go inside?” she asks, turning her head in my direction.
“Not at all.” That’s a bold-faced lie. Although I should move, not her.
“Are you sure? I can feel you memorizing me instead of those reports.”
“Yes, I’m sure. At this point, it doesn’t matter if I’m here or in my office. I’ll be thinking about your curves more than these reports. We should talk about these reports anyway.”
Her turning on her side offers me a different view of the luscious curves I burn into my mind each time I touch her.
“Are those for your deal?”
“Yes. Stacy gave them to me this morning.”
We spend the rest of the afternoon talking about the two deals, along with a host of other related options, like where to live and when to share the news with our families. Noelle plans to share her new business and plans for a center at the same time I do. Despite my desires otherwise, I stay far enough away so I can’t touch her. The moment I touch her will be the last I work today.
During our discussion, I field calls from Nicholas, Jacob, and Esther, Mr. Elliott’s assistant. I schedule a meeting for Thursday afternoon to return on Friday. I sent a quick text to Billie to make sure her condo is empty.
When we finish reviewing most of the reports and talk more about our ideal place to live, I gather everything and bring it into the office. As I return to the terrace, Noelle is stepping into the hot tub sans bikini.
“Care to join me?”
I have never stripped off my clothes faster.
42
Noelle
Sadness overtakes me as I get to work at the end of this week. Cash left in the wee hours this morning to meet with Mr. Elliott about purchasing his stake in Pemberton. When I took the position to tutor Mason, I was grateful to have something to do with my time as well as the opportunity to use my plan. Not only have I been able to help Mason make considerable progress, but it also assisted me in starting my consulting company.
Yesterday I conducted a teleconference with Mrs. Ellerbee and her grandson, Jeremy, after receiving his assessment. While I don’t like to compare my students, Jeremy isn’t as far behind as Mason was. I believe that my work with Mason and Mrs. Waller’s referral will assist Jeremy earlier. I’ll create a plan for him within the next week and work to implement it with the director of his preschool.
“Good morning, Miss Noelle.”
“Hi. Mason. How are you today?”
“Good but sad.”
“I’m sad too. It’s okay to be sad. Your grandmother said you can call me anytime you want or write as often as you would like. I’ll make sure she has my address and phone number.”
“What are my tasks for today?” Mason asks, eager to learn. I don’t normally pat myself on the back, but he didn’t have that eagerness before. I instilled that in him. I just hope his new center allows him to continue to flourish. I have set up a quarterly conference with the director to review his plan and make changes as necessary. I will follow the same procedure for Jeremy after his plan is in place.
“Your choice.”
A huge smile spreads across Mason’s face. He opts for reading, sight word practice, and dramatic play. After a funny rendition of Beauty and the Beast with cardboard puppets, Mason takes a quiet break in his room. While he takes some time, I check my messages.
Billie: I can’t wait to see you tomorrow. The gala is a wonderful event.
Me: I’m still surprised you’re going.
Billie: I’m more than comfortable with my life to see my “parents.”
Me: Good for you. Are you coming in with Cash tomorrow?
Billie: Yes. Maybe I’ll stop by.
Me: Perfect.
After hearing about Billie, her parents, and her learning about her biological father and half sister, I wouldn’t want to be in the same room as her mother. Unfortunately, her mother is Cash’s mother, so I don’t have a choice.
The memories I have of my mother are wonderful and preserved in my head. I recall times where I was grounded or in trouble for something or other, but nothing rises to the level of anguish that Billie must feel for the lies and betrayal.
Cash: I just landed. I’ll call you tonight. Please be aware of your surroundings when you leave. Please don’t go out alone. I made sure there is milk, ice cream, and that dark chocolate you love at home. I love you more.
His overprotective streak almost had him pushing this meeting off until next week so I wouldn’t be alone. While I love the growly possessive vibe he has, I couldn’t allow him to put off this meeting. It’s two commutes. No big deal. On Saturday when Jimmy publishes his story, it will be different. Hence why someone from Jacob’s team will be arriving early Saturday to attend the gala with us.
Me: Good luck. I’ll be fine. I will. Thank you. I love you more.
I toss my phone into my tote and move to rouse Mason. After a soft knock, I find him balling in a comfy chair in the corner of this room.
“What’s wrong, sweetie?”
Between gasps and sobs, he says, “My mommy died.”
“I know, sweetie. Mine died too.”
“Really?” Mason asks softly.
“Yes, my mom and dad died about ten years ago.” I hear footsteps outside Mason’s door. Mrs. Waller is there, but
Mason isn’t aware of her presence.
“Is it hard?” Mason mumbles against my arm.
“What?”
“Having no parents?”
“It is. I’m not as lucky as you, though. You have an amazing grandmother who can take care of you. I didn’t have that.”
“Who took care of you?” Mason asks.
I can see the disconnect in his eyes. To him I’m an adult. I don’t need anyone to take care of me like he does. I don’t know the situation with his father, but in his mind, it seems he never had one.
“For about a year, my big brother took care of me. After that I was an adult and I took care of myself.”
“I’m sorry, Miss Noelle.”
“Thank you, Mason. I am too.”
Mrs. Waller enters the room and declares schoolwork done for the day. The three of us bring a drink to the rooftop and absorb some sunlight. Tomorrow is my last day with Mason. He’ll be moving on. The director at his new center is competent and willing to work with me for him. Either way, I’ll miss seeing him every day.
After driving straight home, I change into comfy clothes and edit my draft of Jeremy’s education plan. I hope to get it finished tomorrow afternoon before Cash gets back from Portsmouth. Saving the latest draft, I close my laptop to answer the intercom.
“Miss Barnett, there is a Miss Caroline Waterman here to see you.”
I pause before answering. “Good afternoon, Arthur. Does she have long, dark hair, average height, and she was here with August Morgan a few weeks ago?”
“Yes.”
Good. Otherwise, I had no idea who she is.
“Please send her up.” I consider changing quickly but decide against it. I wonder what she needs. Cash wouldn’t send her. He would send Sam to check on me. As she steps inside, I greet her. “Hi, Caro. How are you?”
“I’m well. How are you?”
“Pretty good.” I move into the kitchen. “Drink?”
“Water, please.”
I grab two waters and lead her outside. “What’s up?”