by Daisy May
“Sorry about that,” Andy said. “I didn’t mean to make things weird.”
“Oh, believe me, they were already going to be weird.” I laughed.
We looked at each other for a long moment, and I wondered what else I should say. I wasn’t sure what I was even doing here. Andy wasn’t my friend. Well, I guessed he was, but I didn’t know why or how it had happened.
“How’s your group home?” he asked.
I told him about it, which only made me stress more. This man was successful enough to have his own apartment. Why did he care what my group home was like? Why was I explaining it to him in the tone of someone talking about the vacation they just gone on? I didn’t belong in his world – now more than ever.
“It sounds like a good place for you,” he said. “Better than jail, at least.”
“About that.” I set my hands on the table, waiting patiently as the waitress set our drinks in front of us. As soon as she was out of earshot, I continued. “I’m going to pay you back. Every cent. I just need to get a job, and I’ll make a payment plan if I need to. I’m not going to take your money like that.”
“It’s fine. If you want to, great, but I don’t expect or need that. It was a gift.”
“Well, I expect and need to. I’m going to pay you back for the private investigator, too.”
He shrugged. “What are you thinking in terms of jobs? Are you still planning to go back into retail?”
“I’m thinking more along the lines of prostitution.”
His eyes bulged, and he looked like he was about to choke.
I let a grin break over my face. “I’m fucking with you, Andy. I’m planning to sell my body… as a waiter. They say they get amazing tips.”
“You had me going for a second.”
“I should be insulted that you think I’d turn to sex work so easily.”
“Well, you always seem to be looking for that quick buck. I’m surprised you haven’t tried it already.”
“All right, I may have considered it, but I haven’t done it.”
I looked at the menu, wondering what I wanted. I hadn’t had a proper meal in six months, and this place had everything I could have asked for – burgers, fries, pasta, chicken wings. I wanted everything.
“You look like you’re about to come,” Andy said.
I snorted. “I guess you know the look.”
He choked for real. “I remember a few things,” he finally said.
A rush of heat went through my body. “Well, anyway.” I looked back at the menu. “I want to eat everything. I want to do all the things I couldn’t do in prison, actually.” That sounded more sexual than I’d intended. I didn’t mind.
“Is that so?” He looked at me keenly. He could’ve avoided the sexual implications, but he was going with them anyway. Interesting.
“Oh, you know.” I shrugged noncommittally.
“No, I don’t know.”
“What do you want to know?”
He bit his lip. “The jail was full of men, wasn’t it? I know things happen. You didn’t…”
I raised an eyebrow. “Jealous, are you?”
His cheeks reddened. “No, I’m just curious.”
“I don’t mind if you’re jealous. It’s kind of cute, actually.”
“Instead of telling me how cute I am, you could just answer the question.”
“All right. The answer’s no. I haven’t fucked or been fucked by anyone since you.” I spoke loudly enough to make heads turn. Luckily, I didn’t give a shit. I lowered my voice slightly, only to make Andy more comfortable. “I had some offers, but I didn’t feel like it. No one was forcing it on me, and I didn’t click with anyone in that way.” I smirked at the look of relief on his face. “What about you, anyway? You’ve been dating around.”
“I kissed a couple of my dates. Nothing more than that.”
There was that odd, inexplicable feeling of jealousy again. I hated it. “Why not?”
He looked away. If he had an answer, he didn’t have time to give it, because the waitress came to take our orders. I ordered enough food for a week. I intended to gorge myself. If Andy was hoping to get in my pants, he’d have to wait. After this, I’d be too full to have sex even if I wanted to.
We didn’t talk more about our relationship as we ate, not that there was much to talk about. We were friends – friends who had fucked once, and who might do it again. I wasn’t in love with him, and I wasn’t hung up on him. I had more important things to think about than dating right now.
It was a shame, though.
I’d never really thought about settling down, but if I did, it’d be with someone like him.
THIRTY – ANDY
Tyler had been flirting lightly through the entire meal. Now that we’d finished eating, it was time to make my decision.
“Do you want to come to my place?” I asked.
His eyes darkened as he looked at me. I wondered what was going through his head. Had he been wanting this all along? Or was he just going to go along with it? Was someone like him even capable of feeling anything?
As different as he was, I wanted him. And as he slowly nodded, I knew I was going to have him.
I drove him back to my place, and once we got upstairs, I helped him out of his jacket. He was wearing the same beat-up clothes he’d had on when I first met him, but it didn’t matter when I was about to get him out of them.
“I’m glad you could come today,” I said. The words were pointless, mundane, but there was nothing else I could say that would convey the significance of this moment.
“Oh, I haven’t come yet,” he said. “That’s your job.”
I had to smile. I’d missed his dirty mind and his flirtatious glances. I’d had a little of that over the phone, but it was different in person. Everything was.
I leaned toward him, inhaling his unique Tyler scent. His pupils dilated as he looked back at me. A stray hair lay across his forehead, and I gently, almost lovingly, brushed it out of the way.
“So here we are,” I said. “I guess it wasn’t just a one-time thing.”
“I’m as surprised as you are.”
“I don’t know why I like you so much,” I admitted. “As hard as I’ve tried, I can’t get you out of my head.”
“I hate to say this, but I like you, too. I don’t know what it is. You just make me melt.”
A surge of joy went through me. “It’s more than like, isn’t it?”
He tilted his head as he blinked at me. “How do you mean?”
“What you feel for me. If it’s anything like what I feel, it’s closer to…” I trailed off, unable to go that far.
But Tyler was already there. “Love?”
“It’s strange and crazy and I have no clue how it happened, but yes. I think I might just love you.”
He took a step back from me, shaking his head. “You can’t, Andy. It’s not right. I’m not the kind of person who gets loved.”
“You could be. You should be.”
His expression was panicked. “Look at me. I just got out of jail. I’m living in a group home. I’m a mess in every way possible.”
“So what? I love you anyway.”
He was getting frantic. “You can’t. You’re professional. Successful. You have an apartment and a car. You can’t go for someone like me. Life doesn’t work like that. Imagine bringing me around your coworkers. Your family.”
“I don’t care. I’ll do it.”
He looked away. “You should be with someone better. Someone more like you.”
I came close to him again, touching his arm. His skin was warm and soft. “You haven’t told me how you feel, Tyler. Do you like me, or do you love me, too?”
“It doesn’t matter,” he said, almost choking up. “No one has ever cared about what I want. They only want to get me out of the way so I won’t be an inconvenience for them. No one wants to be around me.”
“But I do.” I took him by the shoulders, wanting to shake him. I wo
uld’ve done it for real if I thought that would make him see the light. I wanted to be with this man. I could no longer imagine not having him as part of my life.
“It doesn’t make any sense,” he said. “Why would you love me? What do I bring to your life?”
“So much,” I said. “More than I can even say. I haven’t felt happy like I do with you since…” I paused, a puzzle piece falling into place. “Since my father died,” I said wonderingly. “That was when I lost the joy in my life. I don’t know how you did it, but you brought it back. People have noticed. They see the difference in me, and it’s because of you.”
“But I didn’t do anything,” he said. “Whatever I did wasn’t on purpose. “
“That makes it even better,” I said. “You did it just by being you.”
I took his moment of silence as an opportunity to press a kiss to his cheek. When he didn’t resist, I looked him in the eye. His expression was so open and unguarded that I could read everything written there. He was scared, and maybe ashamed of himself. But behind all of that, there was a light – a light of hope.
He wanted to be with me. He just wasn’t sure if he was good enough. And I was going to do my level best to prove to him that he was.
I brought my lips to his, and my whole body melted into the kiss. We fit together like we’d been made for each other, and we didn’t draw apart for a long time.
For a moment, I thought I’d gotten through to him. Then he was shaking his head again, pulling away. “I can’t do this,” he said. “It wouldn’t be fair to you. I’m a terrible person, Andy. I don’t deserve someone like you.”
“Then you’ll have to work on that,” I said with a shrug. “You can always improve yourself, but I can’t stop loving you.” I stroked his arm. “God knows I’ve tried.”
He let out a long sigh. The look he gave me was unvarnished and desperate. I laced my fingers through his hair and brought him to me again. This time, I deepened the kiss, sliding my tongue against his until I brought a groan from low in his throat. I nibbled his lower lip, loving the way he quivered under my teeth. I brought my hands to his back and stroked it. In return, he brought his fingers to my neck and trailed them over my chest and down my stomach toward my groin.
I let out a breath. His hands on me were what I’d been waiting for all this time. We were going to finish what we’d started months ago. Being apart from him had felt wrong. Having him with me now felt so natural, and I hoped we’d stay this way for a long time. Maybe even forever.
Slowly, tentatively, he undid the top button of my shirt. I nodded to him eagerly, feeling heat rise within my body. I watched his face as he undid the rest of the button. His expression was aroused and determined and intense all at once.
When he had my shirt open, he pressed soft kisses to my chest and abs. He slid the fabric over my shoulders. “You’re telling me you kept this body away from anyone all this time?” he asked.
“A great loss to the world,” I said, managing some snark even though my breath was hitching in my chest. “I already told you, I didn’t want anybody else.”
“And neither did I,” he said, running his palm over my cock. “I thought about it – those months were long, and I had no one to even touch. When guys tried to hook up with me, I considered it. But I couldn’t go through with it.”
“You were too in love with me.” I let my head roll back as he licked along my neck.
“I hated you for it,” he breathed. “I don’t know what you did to me. I just couldn’t get you out of my head.”
Now that we were finally here, together, he was telling me all the things I’d hoped to hear. He could’ve been lying, but I could tell he wasn’t. He was for real.
He made his way down my neck and chest, kissing and licking so that I squirmed under his tongue. When he reached my abs, he nibbled lightly, sending sharp waves of pain and pleasure coursing through me. My hips pressed upwards, begging for his attention.
He gave me a look of dark amusement. “Seems like somebody wants something.”
Too far gone for his teasing, I took his hand and pushed it between my thighs. His fingers met my hardness, and I jerked under his touch.
He rubbed me for a minute, and then he slid my pants off. “I need you.”
“Good, because I need you. And I have everything we need this time.”
He gave me a devilish grin. “Are you scared to say the word ‘condom’?”
“No.” I huffed.
“Say it, then. Condom. Condom. Condom.”
“I’ll do you one better.” I grabbed the package from the drawer. “I’ll put the condom right on you.”
Raising his eyebrows at me in a challenge, he threw off his clothes. He looked as gorgeous as I remembered – in fact, my memories hadn’t been able to preserve just how incredible his naked body was. He looked like a vision from a dream.
I worked the latex over his shaft and coated it with lube, thrills going through me as my fingers grazed over him. Soon that big, hard cock would be inside me, giving me everything I’d been waiting for all these months.
I lay on the bed, my legs spread, and waited impatiently as he climbed on top of me. He pressed his tip to my entrance, and his eyes met mine. We both took a breath, connecting in a moment of mutual anticipation.
And then he pushed inside me, seating himself in one long, slow thrust.
I let out a cry from the sheer bliss of it. Tyler was inside me, finally inside me – and he hadn’t even begun to move. As he pulled an inch out and slid back in, my eyes squeezed shut and my hips rocked up to meet his. My hands drifted to his waist, gripping him as if to keep him from pulling out.
“Fuck, Tyler, I’ve been wanting you for so long.” I clutched at his broad shoulders.
His voice was tight as he responded. “Me, too… but it was worth the wait.”
He pressed his torso against mine, and I cried out even louder. I couldn’t bear the heat of his body, his entire length laid out against mine. This was too good, too much. I inhaled his musk, more aroused than I’d ever been in my life. The man I loved was with me, and everything was going to be all right.
He brought his lips to mine, claiming them in a heated kiss. His teeth sank into my lower lip, and the pain mixing with pleasure made me want to explode right there and then.
I laced my arms and legs around him, holding onto him tighter than ever. I didn’t want him to ever leave – and I knew he wouldn’t. As his thrusts grew faster, mine met his speed. We moved as one, as if our two souls inhabited a single body. I’d never felt so close to anyone in my life.
The sensations washing over me were intense, and I clung to him as waves of ecstasy rolled over me. I wasn’t quite there yet, but with him on top of me, and his cock doing the things it did, I wasn’t far off.
“Oh – Andy – fuck…” He pressed hot kisses to my neck. “The things you’re doing to me, baby.”
“The feeling… is mutual.” I groaned out the words with an effort.
His thrusts grew more and more intense, and I felt my orgasm start to come on.
“Fuck,” I moaned, “make me come. Do it to me. Please…”
I didn’t have to beg him any longer. The climax washed over me, and all I could do was hold on.
And this time, I knew it wasn’t going to be a one-time thing.
THIRTY-ONE – TYLER
For the next few days, I slept at the group home, and I spent my free time with Andy. It was less time than I would’ve liked, seeing as he worked nine to five. Still, during the weekends, we had plenty of time to see each other. While he was at work, I job-hunted. There were less waiter jobs available than I would’ve expected, and I wasn’t sure if I’d get one with a criminal record.
“I think you’d do well at a diner or a fast food place,” Andy said. “You know, something where they expect the waitstaff to have a bad attitude.”
“Hey, I can be cheerful,” I said.
“I’ve never seen any evidence of that.
”
I pasted a demonic smile onto my face, propping myself on my elbow to show him as we lay in bed.
“Okay, that’s terrifying,” he said, trying to wriggle away from me.
I grabbed hold of him and wouldn’t let him go until he admitted I could be cheerful.
As it turned out, the first interview I got was at a higher end restaurant. I picked up a nice black blazer and some loafers, and Andy was shocked at how well I cleaned up.
“One would think you were a classy gentleman or something,” he said, combing my hair back with his fingers.
“You say that like I’m not one,” I complained.
I hadn’t been to a job interview in years, and I’d never actually made an effort with them before. When I had gotten hired, it was only because those stores were so desperate they would’ve taken anyone.
This time, I did my best to be polite and charming. I answered the questions as well as I could, pausing to think them over before replying.
At the end, the interviewer nodded. “We usually prefer to take people with experience in the restaurant industry, but we do have a bussing position available. You’ll start there and work your way up. Does that sound okay with you?”
I wasn’t sure.
“You get a share of the waitstaff’s tips,” he clarified.
“All right then, I’m in!”
Being a busboy was easy enough. I ran back and forth between tables, picking up whatever was left after the customers were done. I helped wash dishes and refill water glasses. It wasn’t something I would’ve liked to do long term – it was much more work than I preferred – but it was all right for the moment, especially since I knew they’d give me a waiter job soon enough.
Maybe the six months working in the prison kitchen had endowed me with a work ethic. God knew I’d never had one before.
As a few days went by, I was getting into the swing of things. They had me working evenings, which took away from my time with Andy, but we still spoke on the phone every morning – he’d started calling me instead of his mom.
This was only for a little while. We hadn’t confirmed it yet, but I assumed that when I moved out of the group home, I’d move in with him. We would’ve been dating for a while at that point, and it would only make sense.