by LeAnn Ashers
Travis interrupts my thoughts. “What has you thinking so hard?”
I laugh. “Oh, nothing.”
“M-hm,” his deep, beautiful voice murmurs. How is even that sexy?
I look at Gabby, and I know immediately something is not right. She is clutching her right side, above her hip. She stumbles to the edge of the playground and vomits.
I run over to her and hold her hair out of her face. “What is wrong, baby?”
She groans and continues holding onto her side.
Travis stands on her other side. “Does your side hurt?” He asks her.
She nods and ducks her head, and I can see tears falling down her face.
“Let’s get her to the hospital, something is wrong,” I tell him, and he picks her up off the ground. I grab our bag in front of the bench, and I reach inside Travis’s pocket and unlock the SUV. I open the door for him, and he gently sets Gabby in her booster seat.
She holds onto her side, crying harder. I look at Travis in panic. “She usually tries to hold it in when she’s hurting, so she must really be in pain,” I whisper.
“Shh, we will be at the hospital soon,” he tells her while buckling her in, and he shuts the door. When we’re all in the car, Travis looks back at Gabby then at me. I can tell it’s bothering him, and it’s shattering my heart to hear her cries.
He takes out his phone and calls someone. “Myra, I have a patient for you. We will be there in about ten minutes.” He listens for a moment. “She is claiming her right side is hurting her.” He listens again and hangs up. “She is a pediatrician and wife of one of the guys in the neighboring MC.” He speeds up going down the highway.
“Mommy, I am sick again.”
I look around frantically for something for her to vomit in, and then I hear it and smell it. I reach inside my bag and grab some wipes. She is pale, very pale. My stomach is twisting at the sight of her so sick. She has never had anything more serious than a cold. “How long have you been feeling bad, angel?” I brush aside some hair that has come loose from her braid.
“A few days, Mommy, it came and went.” I close my eyes. My baby is strong. I clean her off as much as possible. I will change her at the hospital. Luckily, I bring extra clothes for her everywhere I go. I stare at her the whole ride to the hospital.
“I hurt, Mommy!” Tears fall down her face. The truck pulls to a stop and Travis gets out before I even know we are there. I climb out and grab my bag. He lifts her out of her seat, and she lays her head against his chest with her eyes closed.
A woman is waiting for us at the entrance. She looks at Gabby. “We have a room ready for her.” We follow her into the hospital and to a room, Travis sets Gabby down on the bed, and she buries her head in the pillow.
“Let me take a look at you, sweetheart. I’m Myra by the way.” Myra looks at me . I take a step back, right into Travis. He presses his hand to the small of my back, and I look up at him—but his eyes are on my daughter. I can see he is concerned.
Myra has Gabby lying flat on her back, and she touches the side causing the pain. Gabby cries out and sits up in bed. I cover my mouth with my hand, stifling a scream.
“I need to do some blood work, but I do believe it may be her appendix.”
She leaves and I take her place next to Gabby. “Want to change out of that dirty shirt, baby?” I smooth her hair out of her face. She nods her head, and I look at Travis. He walks to the other side of the room and pulls the curtain closed. I help her out of her shirt and reach in my bag for more wipes.
After cleaning her as well as possible, I slip the clean shirt over her head and settle her back in bed. I touch her forehead, and she feels hot. “She is dressed,” I tell Travis, and he opens the curtain and walks to her other side. Her entire body is shivering. “She has a fever,” I whisper, and he touches her forehead like this is the most natural thing in the world. “I wonder if there is a blanket in here?” I ask myself.
“I will go find one. I will be back in a moment.”
I stare at his retreating back and look back at my daughter. Her eyes are closed and the sight of her just lying there, so pale, and not even knowing what is officially wrong with her is horrible.
Travis returns with a blanket and an extra pillow. He unfolds the blanket and covers her, tucking her in. Then he places the pillow beside her face, and she rolls over, curling around it. There is a small knock and I turn around to see a nurse with a case, letting me know she is here to draw blood.
“Sweetheart, she needs to take some blood.” I rub Gabby’s arm and she opens her eyes. I can see her fear. “It will be over in a second, and that’ll be it.”
The nurse goes to her other side and takes her arm. Gabby looks me dead in the eyes without flinching as her arm is dabbed with the alcohol wipe.
Travis sits in a chair beside me, and I look away while Gabby is stuck with the needle. Her eyes fill with tears once again, her bottom lip trembling. This is killing my soul.
Travis reaches forward and catches her tear. “You are brave, sweetheart,” he whispers, and she manages a small smile. I smile at her, and she closes her eyes again. She is exhausted.
How did I not know she was sick? She has slept so much in the past couple of days, but I thought she was tired from the plane ride and the move. I should have known she did not feel well. What kind of mother am I?
When the nurse leaves, I run my fingers along the top of Gabby’s head. “Sleep, baby, I am right here.”
She nods her little head, and with my free hand I bring the blanket up to her neck. A hand touches me, and I peek around and see Travis stroking my back.
“Thank you for bringing me here and having Myra get her in so quickly,” I whisper, so it doesn’t disturb her.
“It was nothing, Momma, I just want her to feel better.” Why do I find that so attractive? His calling me Momma? But I think he could call me a potato and I would like it.
We sit and wait, and it seems like forever before Myra comes back. “It seems that her appendix is extremely close to rupturing, immediate surgery is needed.”
My heart sinks and shatters. I knew Gabby was sick, but an operation? I nod at Myra, but I cannot give her my words because they seem lost. “I will get everything set in motion,” Myra informs me, and I nod again. My mouth is dry, and my throat feels like it’s closing together.
A Couple of Hours Later
As they push my daughter away in her bed, I cover my mouth. It takes everything in me not run after her to tear her away.
“Bailey,” Travis says and, when I look at him, tears that have been trying to fall since the moment I found out Gabby needed surgery pour out. His face softens in a way that I have not seen before, his hand wraps around the back of my neck, and my face rests on the center of his chest. I fist his shirt, and he settles one hand on the back of my head and the other on my back. “She will be fine,” he whispers to me, lips pressing against the top of my head. I close my eyes and, for the first time in years, I allow myself to not be strong, to let someone take the burden off of me. I have not been held or comforted in so long that it seems foreign, but I need this. His smell wraps around me like a protective bubble. He sits down with me in a room without a bed.
“She has never been sick like this before. She’s my baby and it kills me to see her go through things like that.”
“I know, sweetheart, but she will be better before you know it.” He settles back into his seat and takes me with him. I close my eyes and dry my tears. The time for being weak is over, but I will allow myself to continue to be in his arms. Who would dare leave?
Travis
What a fucking day, I knew the moment I saw Gabby bent over holding her side that something was wrong. The sight of her pale face and then her getting sick? I could feel it right to my fucking core.
Bailey is curled into my chest, asleep. She is mentally drained. I have seen a lot of amazing mothers, but I have never seen anyone who loves her daughter as much as Bailey loves Gabby. It
gives me such great pleasure that she is letting me comfort her. I know that she has been alone for so long, but I want her to know that is not the case anymore.
A nurse pops her head into the room. “I am here to take you to the waiting room, to wait for her to get out.”
“Sweetheart, wake up.”
Bailey jumps away, her hair a mess. “Is she out?”
“No, sweetheart, we are being taking to the waiting room.” I instinctively smooth her hair out of her face. She gets out of her chair, yawning. I take out my phone and shoot a text to Wilder, asking him if he can bring me some food, clothes, and other things we’ll need for a few days. I am not leaving her alone. Never again.
Bailey
She is out of surgery and it’s now night time; she is back in her room resting. She is pretty doped up on medication but, thankfully, she is going to be fine.
The weight of the world was lifted off my shoulders the moment they told me that they had caught it just in time and she is going to be perfectly okay. For the first time that day, I could finally breathe. I thought Travis would leave once the doctors said she would be alright, but he’s asleep sitting up in a chair. He was right by my side the whole time. I wasn’t alone. It’s such a strange feeling.
I see an extra blanket at the foot of her bed. I stand up, unfold it, and gently cover him up. His eyes are open, staring at me. A warm, fuzzy feeling hits me right in the pit of the stomach. “Thank you, Travis,” I whisper, smiling at him, and I turn away. I do not want him to see what I am really feeling right now, because I am not sure of that myself.
He had his friend brings us blankets, food, and clothes, along with toiletries to make sure we are comfortable. He thought of everything. What he is doing right now means more to me that anything else in this world: just being here. I grab my pillow and blanket and curl up the best I can in my small chair. Then I close my eyes, hopefully to a wake up to a better day.
Travis
I wake up to a finger poking me in the face, and I open my eyes and see Gabby staring at me. “How are you feeling?” I touch her arm.
“My tummy hurts and I am hungry,” she whispers. I look over at Bailey and see she is sound asleep.
“I will go get a nurse for you, okay?” Gabby nods her head, and her body is shaking again. I touch her forehead. She is cool—it must be the room; hospitals are really cold. I cover her up with my blanket; then I walk to the nurses’ station. I inform them of what is happening, and a nurse grabs a breakfast tray. I take it from her. “Please be as quiet as possible. Her mother is exhausted.” She nods and we quietly walk back into the room.
The nurse goes over to Gabby’s IV and puts in some pain medication. “That should feel better soon now. Try to eat as much as you can.”
I place the tray on the table. “Do you need me to feed you?”
She nods and I help her sit up so she can eat easily. “Thank you, Ravis.”
I smile at her. “Anything for you, sweet girl.” I touch the side of her face.
Bailey
I wake up to the most beautiful sound in the world, the sound of my baby’s giggles, and then the most incredible sight. Travis is feeding my daughter breakfast; I think this the most surprising thing yet. His hair is all messed up on top, and his clothes are rumpled from his sleep. “Another?” he asks her softly. She nods, and he gives her another bite of eggs. “Your belly feel better?”
“The medicine made it feel better.” She hesitantly reaches down to touch her side, and Travis stops her.
“Don’t touch it, honey.” I close my eyes when I notice Travis looking at me, and I don’t want this moment to end. So I pretend.
“Ravis, can you fix my hair?” Gabby asks and I try to hold in my laughter.
“I can try.” I can hear him walking into the bathroom. I crack my eyes open, and Gabby is staring right at me, smiling. I am totally busted.
“Go back to sleep, Momma,” she whispers and I close my eyes, trying to hide my smile, just as Travis walks back out. I peek just a little bit.
“I have no clue what I am doing, you just want me to brush it?” Travis asks.
“Braid it too, please.”
His eyes widen, and I cover my mouth with my blanket. He helps her move to where he can reach her hair easily. He puts the brush at the crown of her head then brings it down until it snags on a tangle. She winces.
“I’m sorry, I am not good at this shit.” Gabby giggles at his cuss words. “Fuck, your mom is going to kill me,” he grumbles and she laughs because he did it again. “She is going to kill me for sure now,” he says a little louder than a grumble and I laugh this time, not able to help myself.
He looks over at me accusingly. “You were awake the whole time, weren’t you?”
I sit up and wink and he smirks at me. I walk over and take the hairbrush from him. “Thank you, Travis.” He smiles at me beautifully. It should be a crime for a man to look this good in the mornings. I probably look like shit, honestly.
He touches my back, getting my attention. “Want me to go downstairs and get us some breakfast?”
“You don’t…” I stop at the look on his face and roll my eyes. “That will be great. Thank you, Travis.”
He smiles that flipping smile and leaves the room just like that.
“He’s funny, Mommy.”
“He is…and very nice.” I continue brushing her hair
“Can we go home today?” she asks, and I stop midstroke. “I am not sure. It’s up to your doctor, baby.”
“Maybe if we are really nice he will say yes. Or if I do the look that gets you to say yes for toys.”
I laugh, patting her on the back. “You just told on yourself, Gabby.”
She covers her mouth with her hand. “Uh oh.”
“Uh oh…yes, little girl.”
She laughs. She knows she isn’t in trouble, because I have known of this look since she was old enough to make it. I put her hair in a loose French braid to keep it out of her face. She doesn’t need to come back to have the stitches taken out, thank goodness. It’s a small incision, but it was scary just the same. The thought of something going wrong or her not waking up was deep in my mind.
Later, Travis shows up with two bags. He hands me one and I smile.
“Thank you, Travis, this means so much.” I don’t want to seem ungrateful.
He doesn’t say anything for a few beats; he just stares at me, his eyes locked on mine. “No thanks are needed.” He cups his hand around the back of my neck.
Gabby is lying back in bed, her eyes drifting closed, watching cartoons.
“Tired, baby?” She nods. I reach over, but Travis beats me to it and brings the blanket up to her chin. He confuses me. I am not used to seeing a guy having such a nurturing side. My father doesn’t; I don’t even think he ever hugged me. My mother wasn’t either. I had a nanny until I was old enough to take care of myself.
One of the most devastating things that happened to me as a kid was when my nanny was let go. She was the only mother figure I’d ever had. I think that is why I let so much go when I was dating Gabby’s father. I wanted to be loved so much, because I’d never had that growing up.
I am glad all of that is over. I am in a new place with new people, and these people are like saints or something.
I finish my food, stuff all of my empty wrappers in the garbage, and walk over to get Travis’s before he can do it himself. The death glare that I just got should be enough to scare me, but that is one thing I am not: scared. Under the mean-looking exterior, he is a big softy. Well, to me and Gabby, that is. I know he is a dangerous man, but I see the side that stayed with me in the hospital, comforted me, and tried to fix my daughter’s hair. I see how comfortable Gabby is with him. She is usually shy around everyone but me. But she’s never been that way around him. Not once.
“I will stay with her, go do what you need to do,” he tells me. I hesitate, looking at Gabby, even though I have to fill out some paperwork—I had to get a lot of
stuff faxed over from Hawaii.
Travis
The moment Bailey leaves, Gabby opens her eyes and looks at me. I lean over the bed railing. “You need something?”
She shakes her head, studying me. “Do you want to be my momma’s boyfriend?” That is not what I expected her to say.
“I would love to be your momma’s boyfriend. We just have to get her to like the idea.” I wink at her.
She smiles, hitting me right in the fucking chest. “I think she already likes you.” She whispers the last part, looking at the door.
“Teamwork?” I put my fist out for her to bump. She bumps her tiny fist against mine, and I laugh. She is adorable.
“I’m going to sleep now.” She yawns, covering her mouth. “Will you hold my hand, Ravis, until Momma gets back?” Last night, she fell asleep holding Bailey’s hand; she was scared to be in the hospital.
“Sure, baby.” I put down the railing, and her tiny hand completely disappears in mine. The top of her head barely reaches my hip. With every flutter of her eyes closing, a bit of my heart falls away. It hits me all at once. My brothers have been telling me all along I would know. I know this little girl is supposed to be mine; she is supposed to be my daughter. Don’t ask me how I know this, but when I look at her it’s like my heart reclaims a piece I never knew was missing.
I pull the blanket up under her chin and push her bangs out of her face. Freckles brush the tops of her nose and cheeks. “Sleep, little princess,” I whisper as her eyes finally close. She squeezes my hand. It’s like she knows.
Bailey
A Week Later
Gabby and I are sitting on the couch watching TV. She is doing a lot better; she’s almost back to herself.
There’s a small knock at the door before Travis steps inside the house. One part of me thought once we were home he would go back to his own schedule. That is not the case. He stays with us all day long until bedtime, and he is back first thing in the morning.