by Scott Allen
“By the way, sir, you’ve been promoted to captain. I asked the colonel if I could tell you.”
“Thanks, Blaine,” said Dana. “But, you’re the one who deserves promotion.”
“Thank you, sir, and in fact, they made me Company Sergeant when Carroll got promoted.” Blaine replied. Dana gave him a thumbs up.
“Well, how are we this morning?” said a woman in a white coat as she came through the doorway. As she approached, Dana could see that her name tag read, “Dr. Donna.”
“I guess we are doing more or less OK,” replied Dana. Sergeant Blaine watched her carefully.
“You had a nasty head injury and a wound in your thigh,” said the doctor. “We patched you up. You’re young and strong, and you’re going to be fine. Please don’t move around until your headache goes away, though, and if it gets worse, we need to know right away. After that, we’ll have you on your feet in no time, OK?” Dana nodded, and she left.
CHAPTER SIXTY-THREE
A young woman came in pushing a cart with some equipment on it. “Hi, Captain,” she said. “I saw that you were awake. We are giving all the patients an opportunity to make viewscreen calls to anyone they like, if you’re up to it. I have to warn you, though, that everyone across the country is making calls, and the circuits are overloaded. It may be hard to get through.”
“I guess I’m up to it,” said Dana. He had a great hunger to speak to Nance, despite his headache and fuzziness. Although the men in his platoon clearly cared about him, it wasn’t the same as Nance. He had suppressed thoughts of her during the fighting, because he couldn’t talk to her anyway. But now, he felt suddenly nervous. He wasn’t sure of what he was going to say. Had she been killed, or if she was alive, would she still want to bother with him? Blaine, anticipating him as well as always, slipped out, saying he would be outside the door.
The young woman pushed the tray table over his abdomen, pushed the button that elevated him to a sitting position, centered his face in the lower right corner of the viewscreen, and showed him how to enter the address of Nance’s wristscreen. Dana winced at his image. His wild hair, bloodshot eyes, and large scar across the top of his head didn’t make a pretty picture.
At first the call didn’t go through, and Dana’s imagination exploded with dire possibilities. Had Nance been killed? The viewscreen automatically tried again, and then the caption at the bottom of the screen read, “Lawrence, Kansas,” and a low-resolution picture of Nance’s face appeared on the viewscreen. “Captain Nance here … Dana! Dana! I heard you were hurt!” The voice didn’t quite correspond to the way her lips moved, but Dana didn’t care.
“Not so bad, Nance. I’ll be up and around in a few days. Damn, it’s good to see your face! What have you been doing?” Dana said.
“Nothing as dramatic as you,” she replied. “I’ve been running a company preparing propaganda for distribution to enemy forces. By the way, that beard looks good on you, Lover.”
“Thanks.” He smiled. “Well, your propaganda worked,” said Dana. “The enemy was demoralized and we usually went through them like … like a hot knife through butter,” remembering a phrase she had taught him. “I’m glad you didn’t have to fight.”
“They wouldn’t have let someone in my condition fight, anyway,” said Nance. She stood up. The picture began to fade out, but before it went black, he could see that she was obviously pregnant.
Dana was stunned. Obviously, she had found another man. The viewscreen kept trying to reconnect, but failing. Dana’s spirits fell to rock bottom. He felt like a fool. Maybe what some of the men said about women was right – they would quickly drop one man for a higher-status man, and she must have met one and gotten pregnant right away. He was nothing to her, just someone to work on her farm and have fun with until a better man came along. And, Dana had to admit, there were probably plenty of higher status men out there who would find Nance attractive. She was pretty and smart and fun, and what was he? An uneducated and poor man with no prospects. Could he blame her? Everything became clear to him very quickly.
He put his head in his hands. The young woman who had brought in the viewscreen looked concerned and asked if he was OK. “Just some bad news,” Dana said, “I’ll get over it.”
It wasn’t like this would be the end of the world for him, anyway. He had gotten along fine without women in his life for ten years, and he could live that way the rest of his life. Anyway, there were probably ten million young women in America that would be interested in him, and not that nearly that many men to compete with. If he wanted to compete. He wasn’t sure it would be worth it. He was just going to have to forget about Nance and move on.
But, images of his months with Nance came flooding into his head. Working on the farm, her sewing up his wounded leg, laughing at each other’s jokes, her attempts to explain history and economics to him, their drive to the south to find condoms, making love in so many ways, admiring her and feeling admired – was that all just light playacting on her part? She had said she couldn’t stand it if he were hurt, she had melted in his arms and cried when they had parted. Was that all just how women behaved until a “better” man came along? Did they just magnify their emotions for effect, or did their emotions just spring from place to place and man to man like a grasshopper?
He decided that if he ever got involved with a woman again, he was going to hold himself back. He was not going to fall in love again.
Blaine was standing next to the bed. “Sir, the comm tech said you seemed upset about something. Can I help?”
Dana took his head from his hands and tried to look cheerful. ”That’s good of you, Blaine, but I’ll get over it,” said Dana. “After all we’ve been through, it’s really a minor thing.”
The comm tech looked at the viewscreen and tried a few tricks to re-establish the connection, but failed. “I’m going to need to move this to the next room, Captain,” she said. “But if your party calls back, I will bring it back as soon as possible.” Dana watched her, feeling bleak, as she wheeled the apparatus out of the room.
Dana looked at Blaine. “Listen, Blaine, will you visit the men from the company here in the hospital and tell them that I will come and visit them when I’m allowed to get up?”
“Yes, sir. I’ve already seen each one. There’s only one that looks like he might not make it – Rickie. But the whole company knows you are going to be OK, and every man wishes you well, sir,” said Blaine.
“Thanks, Blaine. I think I’m going to sleep now,” said Dana.
CHAPTER SIXTY-FOUR
Dana woke up from a nightmare, where he and his platoon were trapped, taking enemy fire, and falling like trees in a tornado, and there was nothing he could do. It was a vision of Hell. His heart was pounding in his chest.
He cracked open his eyelids just a fraction, and saw there was one of his corporals standing by. In order to think, Dana pretended to be still asleep. Nance was still on his mind, but sleep had allowed him some distance. He thought to himself that he could hardly be the only person in history who had ever had his heart broken. It must have been a common feature of life for nearly everyone who ever lived, and still was. He was nothing special. Everyone else got over it, and so would he. He couldn’t blame Nance for doing the best for herself that she could, anyway. It was just the way of the world.
Feeling a bit more clear-headed, he opened his eyes and greeted the corporal. The corporal asked if he needed anything, and Dana said he was hungry. The corporal left to find a nurse. After 20 minutes, an attendant entered with a tray of food.
When he had finished, a nurse came in and asked how his headache was. When Dana said it was gone, the nurse said doctor’s orders were for him to try to get up and walk a little. She produced a walker and helped him out of bed. He felt a little dizzy, but grabbed the handles of the walker and moved forward. His thigh wound hurt badly every time he moved. Dana asked the nurse, “My leg wound didn’t hurt during the fighting. Why does it hurt so much now?” The nur
se explained that he was probably full of adrenaline during the fighting, and that this was a well-known phenomenon for soldiers during a battle. He began to feel a little sick, and it must have shown on his face, because the nurse had him sit on a bench, and fanned his face with her tablet viewscreen. Dana realized that his knees were far apart and remembered that this was a violation of the Rules, and started, painfully, to move them back together. Then he started laughing at himself. There were no more Rules! The nurse asked what was so funny, and he said, “Private joke.”
When he got back to the room and eased himself back into bed, the comm tech was waiting with her viewscreen. “Your party called back, sir, and I think there’s enough bandwidth to hold the line, now.” She sat him up in bed facing the viewscreen, and touched the lower left edge. Nance appeared, in her nightdress, obviously in her quarters. The corporal and the comm tech left the room.
Dana wasn’t entirely ready, but he knew what he was going to start out saying. “Nance, I’m happy that you found someone that is right for you. I hope that you and he will be very happy together. Please don’t worry about me. I’ll miss you, but I’ll get along…”
Nance looked puzzled as Dana talked, and then suddenly smiled and tilted her head sideways into her hand and started shaking her head. “Dana! Dana!” she shouted. Dana stopped talking. Nance was almost laughing. Dana wondered how she could be so cruel.
“Dana, you goof. Think back. Do you remember that afternoon in the shower before you left?” she asked.
“Yes …” said Dana, not sure what she was trying to say.
Nance continued, “Do you remember that we forgot something?”
Dana searched his memory. “Oh, my gosh,” he said.
“Yes, that’s right. My fault, too. You’re going to be a father, Dana. It’s a boy,” she said.
Dana’s brain once again went twenty directions at once. The shock must have shown on his face. Nance said, “Now, look, Dana, I love you and I want to spend my life with you and our children. But, if that’s not what you want, I will understand. I’d release you from all obligations.”
“Ah…um…” Dana stammered. Finally he pulled himself together. Nance seemed to be watching with a sense of both amusement and anxiety. Finally, he said, earnestly, “Nance, I don’t know how to say this, but I’m no longer sure what I want. I haven’t had time to think since I left. One part of me wants to scream ‘yes!’ and live with you forever. Another part of me isn’t sure that I’m ready to be a husband and father. I just … don’t know for sure …,” his voice trailed off. He watched her face to see if she was shocked or pained by what he had said. She didn’t seem to be.
Nance looked at him kindly, like a schoolteacher with a befuddled student. “You need to think about this, Dana. It’s a serious step. We will have little lives to care for. Our whole world will change. You need to know that this is right for you, or it won’t be any good for any of us. And, you will need to think about your future and what you want to do with it. You could probably pair up with thousands of women, now that the Rules no longer apply. There are probably five very nice women for any man who wants one. If you really mean what you said, I want to know that you mean it for sure. I never had any intention to trap you. I think we need to talk about this again in a month, after you have some time to think,” she paused. “After all, your thoughtfulness is one of the reasons I love you. Now, tell me about what you did in the war.”
Dana saw the wisdom in what she said, and put the matter into a box in his mind marked, “Later.” He told her about the actions he had been in, and, even though Dana minimized the danger, she knew enough to be impressed that he had come out alive. She said, with emotion in her voice, “I had no idea, Dana. You and your men were very brave. I always knew you were courageous, but now everyone else knows it, too. I’m sorry you lost half the men in your company. Another terrible thing about that is that there is no one to mourn them. Their mothers and fathers don’t know, they never met sisters or brothers, they never met their own children. I’m glad the evil government that created that … awfulness ... is gone.”
They began to talk about the future in vague terms. Nance said that she probably didn’t want to go back to the farm, which was now in Mexico. She said she thought she would sell it, and try to find a job as a history and civics teacher. She understood that there was going to be a great deal of adult education in history and civics, and she thought she could be a part of that. After all, there were very few, if any, people educated in both the version of history and civics that had been taught over the past decades, and the version that had been taught before. She figured that she might be able to write her own ticket, since she was a rare commodity.
Dana said he wasn’t sure what he wanted. He didn’t know what he could do in a civilian economy. He supposed he might be able to stay in the military, but he had had enough of killing. He said he thought he could go back to repairing appliances, although that didn’t excite him at all.
Nance said, again, very kindly, “Dana, I think you could do just about anything you set your mind to. You just need to decide. You may need education in some field. But, you can do it. Whatever it is, you can do it, Dana. You learn faster and have more insight than anyone I know. You could go a long way and be very important in the new world, Dana.”
Dana was moved by her kindness. “Thanks, Nance,” he said. “But, I don’t even know what the options are.”
“Neither do I, but I know where you can find out. Get yourself a viewscreen and learn how to search on it. There should be sources on there that will tell you about all sorts of jobs and businesses you could be in, and what it would take to get there,” Nance said. Dana agreed that would be a good idea.
Dana began to tire, and Nance detected it. “Let’s wind up and talk again in a month. You need time to think,” she said. Nance looked to the side. Someone was demanding her attention.
“Nance, I wish you were here with me,” Dana decided to speak directly from his heart. “I missed you every day. I tried to put you out of mind … but I couldn’t. I missed talking to you about everything under the sun. I missed your laughter. I missed watching movies with you. I missed your playfulness. I missed … well … you know what I missed. If you were here now, I’d lock the door and toss you in this bed, pregnant or not!”
Nance laughed, “And I would love that!” she said. “But I’m stuck here in Lawrence for a while yet. A month, Lover! Not before!” she said, and the viewscreen went blank.
CHAPTER SIXTY-FIVE
The next day, Dana was capable of making his way around the halls with crutches, and visited the 16 other men of his company that were in the hospital. It made him proud to see that each wounded man had a round-the-clock rotation of comrades standing watch. The men had organized it themselves.
Two of them were not physically wounded, but suffering from battle stress. One of them was Jules. The other man who had joined up with him had been wounded and discharged back to the farm. Dana spoke kindly to each of the two men, and they seemed to appreciate it. They were obviously drugged, and he had no idea how to help them. They seemed to like his company, though.
He read the names on the doors and was surprised to see “Colonel Anson Okoro” on one door. Dana paused. He needed advice, but he had no idea to whom to turn. Presumably, if he had known his father, he could have received advice from him. But, no man knew his father anymore. The Colonel was an older man, perhaps 45, and the closest thing Dana might ever find.
He looked in, and there was his battalion commander sitting up in bed, apparently relaxing after reading a viewscreen. Dana knocked and the Colonel looked at him and smiled. “Captain Dana, isn’t it? Come in, have a seat!”
“I didn’t know you were wounded, sir,” said Dana.
“Got my left foot blown off in a rocket attack at the Capitol. They’re making me a prosthesis now. Got nothing to complain about except that my missing foot itches something terrible,” said the Colonel. “And ho
w are you doing, Dana? By the look of it, you took a blow to the head.”
Dana filled the colonel in on the action at the White House, and then said, “I’m glad I have a chance to talk to you, sir. I need some advice.” The colonel’s eyebrow went up. “Now that the war is over, I’m not sure what I do next. I’m trained to repair household appliances, and I’m trained to lead men in battle. The first one bores me and I think I’m done with the second one. I’m not sure what else to do. To top it off, in a few months I’ll have a child by a woman I think I might want to spend my life with. I’ve never had to make a choice where the possibilities are so endless and I know so little about them.”
The Colonel smiled and held up his hands as if to hold someone back. “Whoa, Dana, there’s a lot going on there! Let’s take the young lady and child first. I take it this is the woman that you lived with after escaping Oklahoma? I’ve read your file.” Dana nodded. “By all accounts she is a remarkable young woman. She leads our propaganda company. The only things I would ask about her is whether or not she’s bought any of the man-hating upbringing women used to get, and whether you know enough about women to make a choice at this point.”
Dana considered. “Sir, she definitely likes men … well, she loves me, anyway. And, I don’t know much about women. She’s the first one I’ve had a relationship with, and that has lasted since early last summer. I don’t think there’s many women like her, though, sir. And, I would have to say that other than her grandfather, she hasn’t had much to do with men, but she loved him.”