by Leah Holt
Following the bend of her shoulder, my gaze licked her body, taking in all she had to offer. I watched her chest rise and fall with even breaths, and the delicate skin of her neck as she swallowed peacefully in her sleep.
Her curves were perfection, shaped like an hourglass, with hips I wanted grip and an ass I could ride for days. The warmth I felt flowed through me, moving through my veins and around my body. It reminded me of when I was a kid, and would drink hot chocolate after coming inside from the cold.
The heat hit me in every crevasse, every pore and strip of muscle, seeping through my stomach and into my pants. My cock thickened as her perfect raindrop-shaped tits pushed against the tight black fabric of her dress.
She looked like sleeping beauty, a princess that had been poisoned by the apple I handed her. Running my hand over the surface of her face, I didn't touch her. I was afraid to wake her, afraid to sour the moment with the anger and hatred she felt for me.
I would hate me too for what I've done.
“What are you doing?” she asked, her voice soft and quiet as her eyes scanned my face.
Jerking my hand away, I rubbed the back of my neck. “I'm checking on you.”
Emery watched me cautiously, shifting her body so she could push herself up. “Where's your mom? I thought she was going to do that.”
“She had to run out, but she made you lunch.” Flicking my eyes to the plate, I nodded my head. “I hope you like turkey.”
Cupping her hands in her lap, she licked her lips. “Is your father here?”
“He's not my father.” My voice came out quick and firm.
“But your mom said—”
“I know what she said, but he's not my father, he's my stepfather.” I tried to hold back the anger from my tone, but it was hard. “I used to call him that, but things haven't been good between us for a long time.”
“Well, I can only imagine why.” Her voice went faint, the words weightless and delicate as she turned her head to look at the window. “Does he know what you're capable of?”
Taking in a deep breath, I closed my eyes. “You think you understand what's going on and who I am, but you don't. Capable and willing are two different things.”
“So, I'm wrong then?”
“Yeah, you're wrong.”
“Wow,” she said, rolling her eyes. “Does that work on other people? Deny, deny, deny. I know what you did, you killed that man. And then you took me, I told you no, but you took me anyway. You can't deny that, those are the facts.” Her hand swept through the air, eyes cutting me open as they pierced my heart, and left me exposed. “I get that he threatened you, but you didn't have to take me, you could have let me go.”
“You're right,” I said, my voice scratchy and cold. “And I'm sorry you think I didn't have a choice, but the truth is, I would have killed that motherfucker regardless. I just didn't want to in front of you. I didn't want you to get involved, but here we are.” Drawing a line in the air between us, I kept my gaze on hers. “The issue is you don't know why, that's the piece you're missing.”
Huffing under her breath, she snuggled back into the blanket, and rolled over away from me. “I don't really care, it doesn't matter. It's not like you're going to tell me.”
“The less you know, the better. I'm not telling you for a good reason. I don't want you involved in this, I'm trying to make sure you don't get hurt.”
“It's a little late for that, don't you think?” Twisting to look at me over her shoulder, she furrowed her brows. “I'm here, I'm fucking broken—literally, I'm not allowed to leave, I can't call home; but you don't want me getting hurt? How does that make sense?”
Braiding my fingers in my lap, I dipped my head into my chest. “If I let you call home, can you make me a promise?”
Her eyes lit up as she shot up in bed, moving faster than I had seen since the accident. “What is it? What do you want me to do?”
“Promise me you won't tell your parents anything. Act totally normal, pretend like everything is the same as usual.”
Dropping back down, she pinched her eyes shut tight. “I don't have parents to call.” Breathing slowly, she lifted her hands to her face, and rubbed her eyes. “They've been gone for years.”
“I'm sorry.” Those were the only words I could find, and I felt stupid for even saying that. It was an automatic response, the two words everyone says when they hear that someone had lost a loved a one.
I had heard that same comment a million times over the years. After my birth father died when I was little, that was the only response I ever got from anyone when I told them he had passed.
And I hated it. I didn't want people to apologize to me for it, I barely remembered the guy. The only thing I could remember was his face, that was it. I wouldn't say I didn't miss the idea of him, of having a real father to look up to, but that's all he was, an idea. I had no real memories, nothing I could draw from that was my own.
It was like I had blocked it all out because it was too painful to think about. Every boy needs their father, and when he's gone, no one else could ever fill their shoes.
All the shit that was in my head about who he was, it was nothing but a fabricated story that I had heard. My mind put those images there, I had no clue what was real and what was fake anymore.
“Don't be,” Picking at her nails, she shrugged her shoulder. “I'm not telling you so you'll feel bad for me, I'm telling you to be honest.”
“Can I ask what happened?”
Her lids turned to slits, mouth turning down. “You don't care why, so why are you asking?”
Cocking a brow, I rocked my jaw back and forth. “You're right, I don't care, I'm curious. I know what it feels like to lose someone, I've been there.”
“How the hell could you know what it feels like, you don't have any feelings, remember?”
Smirking, I couldn't stop my lips from turning up playfully. “Sweetheart, I have feelings. They might not be the ones you want, but I have them.”
“What the fuck does that mean?”
“It means that I'm not completely soulless.” Leaning towards her, I rested on my elbow and traced a single finger up and down the blanket. “I feel things, I've just learned how to hide it, and how to bury it. The only thing I can't seem to get rid of is how fucking angry I still get.”
Emery's face softened as her eyes darted between mine. “I can't understand you, nothing about you makes sense. None of this shit makes sense at all.”
“I never said it would.”
“So why does your mom seem so normal? How are you a product of her?”
“She is normal, she's a great person. But, I wouldn't say I really had any family growing up, I've always been on my own in a way.”
“But you have a family, with a mom, and a stepfather, and a brother, it's not like you were completely alone.”
“Franco doesn't count. That man has always seen me as tarnished, because I'm not his biological son. My younger brother was his pedestal baby, he held him so much higher than he did me. I never did anything right, I've always been a fuckup, those are his words. Who says that to a seven year old child?”
Twining her fingers together, she bit her lip in thought. “I. . . I don't know.”
“I was never his child, and even now, he still doesn't see me as anything but the kid who screwed up his perfect family.”
“Porter—”
“No, it's fine. I got into some really bad shit, and it fucked up their lives. That's why I took you, because I don't want my past to come for you too. I'm trying to save you. Can you understand that?”
Her eyes searched my face, trying to peer deep into my soul. “Then why were you so cold towards me last night? You acted like I wasn't worth all this trouble, like I didn't matter at all. How can I believe that you're trying to save me?”
“I know, I just. . .” Taking in a deep breath, I hung my head. “I was just pissed that I had dragged you into this world. I like you, Emery, and I wouldn't have even sai
d a word to you if I had realized that guy was there.”
“Is that why you were looking around like that before?” Nodding my head, I kept my eyes on my hands. Emery leaned in closer, placing her hand on mine. “Why did he try to kill you? What happened, Porter?”
“I need you to know I'm not the same man I used to be, but the men that are after me, they don't give a fuck. I betrayed them in their eyes, so they took something from me. They took my brother. I shouldn't be here, I never planned on coming back, but when my brother was killed, I don't know, I guess I wanted to stay close for my mother.”
Emery parted her lips, as if she was going to speak. Holding up my hand, I stopped whatever she was about to say. “When I was at the bar and I saw you, there was something about you that drew me in. I had to talk to you, I felt compelled to. I wish I could take it back now, I wish I had just let you walk out the fucking door, because then you wouldn't be here, you wouldn't be in this fucking mess with me.”
A small smile tugged on the corners of her lips. “You mean that? You felt like you had to talk to me?”
“You didn't bump into me by accident.” Chuckling, I scrubbed my jaw. “I had been watching you all night.” Bouncing my hand in the air, I arched a brow. “But not in a stalker kind of way, I just mean I couldn't take my eyes off of you, you're so damn beautiful. And that ass. . .” Biting my knuckles, a deep throaty growl hit the back of my throat.
Her cheeks blushed, turning bright red. “I don't know if I should thank you or slap you.” Giggling, her smile grew wide.
My heart skipped inside my chest, careening around like a caged bird. She really was stunning. Everything about her was perfect, from her velvet smooth skin to her firecracker personality.
What the hell are you doing to me?
Cupping her jaw, I stroked her chin with my thumb. “I need you to know that I'm not keeping you here because I want to hurt you. I'm doing this to keep you safe. Those men will stop at nothing to get to me, and they know you were there too. They'll take you in a heart beat, I won't let them do that, Emery.”
I couldn't stop myself from touching her. I wanted her to feel my words, to understand that everything I was doing came from someplace good. She was my innocent muse, torn into shreds that I wanted to fix.
And she had no fucking idea what was waiting outside for her. That was the worst part. Emery couldn't see who I was dealing with, all she knew was what she had seen, what was tangible for her to try and make sense of.
I wanted to help her, care for her, do anything and everything I could just to ensure that she had a tomorrow. Because it was my fault that she was in this mess to begin with. It was a risk I should never have taken.
Her hand came up and covered mine, lashes fanning her lids like canopies. “Thank you,” she said, tipping her head into my palm as her tongue traced her lips.
“I told you not to thank me yet.” Smirking, I wanted to kiss her. I wanted to kiss her and taste her and finish what we had started. But I held back, not wanting to push her if she wasn't ready.
She was still hurting, her injuries fresh and new, her mind wandering aimlessly over and over from what she had been through. Now she had facts to dwell on, information about who I was and what was happening around us.
See me for me, not the monster I once was.
Her eyes glazed over as her head nuzzled deeper into my hand. “You can if you want to.”
“I can what?”
Smirking, she pushed herself up, leaning in closer. “Kiss me.”
“Who said I wanted to kiss you?”
“I can see it on your face.” Arching her back, her head rolled to the side, lids hooding seductively. “You better do it now, before I change my mind.”
Biting my lip, I smiled. “I won't say no.”
Gently, I brushed my nose against hers, our lips barely touching. The sensation of her skin on mine, of the warmth of her face, her breath, her beauty, it ignited the fire deep inside my soul.
This was why I needed to keep going, this was why I needed to stay alive. To find the person that could make me feel, the person who could help me smile and laugh, help me be complete.
For years all I wanted was to be a part of a family, and I could never see it until now. It wasn't what I had that would make me who I was, it was what I would find that would make me the man I wanted to be.
And I found it in this woman.
Call me crazy for believing that this woman was the one who could hand me everything I ever wanted. But it's not about what I knew about her, it's about what I felt.
This wasn't love at first sight, this was so much more.
Emery closed her eyes, exhaling against my face, and parting her lips. The tip of her tongue teased the entrance, softly licking my bottom lip.
That was it, I had lost it. I lost my control, I lost my will to be gentle and kind. All I wanted was to make her mine over and over again.
Because that was what she was going to be.
She was mine to save, mine to protect, mine to enjoy.
Chapter Nine
Emery
His tongue swept inside my mouth, devouring me like I was the air he needed to survive. Every ounce of my being needed this man.
When he spoke, I felt it. When he touched me, I felt it. It's as if I knew who this man was without needing any real confirmation. He isn't the bad guy. He's protected me, cared for me, saved me.
I didn't need to fear him, despite the nervousness sitting in my core. But it's not a fear of him, it's a fear of how badly I want this.
What are you doing Emery?
Why are you giving in to him?
Fuck it. None of it matters, I need to trust myself.
Everything else doesn't matter. Not how we got here, not who he was before we met, not what brought us to this place. All that matters was who he was when he took me. A knight in shining armor doesn't have to come riding in on a white horse, he only needs to be there when it counts.
And Porter was there when it counted most.
Kissing me harder, Porter drove his tongue into my mouth, tasting and dancing over the ridges. Swooping his hands around my face, he pulled me in, holding me tight.
I didn't want him to let me go, I wanted to be as close to him as possible. My insides twisted up like rope, afraid of what it would feel like if he suddenly released me, and pushed me away.
His hands felt too good, his arms felt too comfortable, this man was filling a void I didn't know existed.
Loneliness.
For that small space in time, I was whole, everything was perfect. I wasn't drowning, I wasn't suffocating with wonder and concern. I couldn't feel any of the pain anymore as our lips sealed and our breathing turned into labored gasps.
With firm fingers, Porter raked his hands through my hair, tugging my head back. For a split second, the slightest of moments, his eyes connected with mine, hesitant and worried that he might have hurt me.
Nodding, I moaned, giving him all the response he needed to know I liked what was happening. Savage and unhinged, his mouth thinned into a tight smirk as he glided flat hands down over my shoulder-blades and pulled me against his chest.
His touch was hard and gentle, it was fierce and sensual. He was touching me as if we had a history together, and he knew exactly how I liked it.
“Does your chest hurt?” he asked, delivering a tender nibble on my shoulder.
“A little, but I'm alright.” Running my hand up his stomach, I felt the sharp stone of his abs as he clenched his muscles. “I don't want you to worry about me, I can handle it.”
Letting out a breath of air, he whispered. “If I hurt you, you need to tell me. I don't ever want to cause you pain.”
“I will,” I said as his fingertips traced my spine, forcing my skin to prickle. “But, I'm not worried about you hurting me.”
His lips brushed my forehead as he spoke, and his cheek grazed mine as he pressed our faces together. The sharp edges of stubble scraped across my skin, mak
ing my pussy throb.
“Good, because all I want to do is make you feel good.” Growling, Porter dug his fingers into my hips as he bit my neck.
“I want you, Porter, I need you.” Working my fingers back down over his chest, I tugged at the hem of his jeans. “You have to finish what you started.”
“Fuck yeah I do.” Climbing onto his knees, he pressed forward, forcing me to lay back. “Princess, you have no idea what I could do to you. I'd fucking corrupt you if I could.”
Arching my back, I twisted my head into the pillow. “You already have.” My lids lowered, eyes twinkling with lust and hunger. “You corrupted me the second you touched me.”
Porter groaned, crawling over my chest, and staring down at me. Positioning his arms on either side of my head, he used his knee to spread my legs open. My stomach tumbled, filling with corded knots. He had me trapped in the best way possible.
Strong arms cradled my skull, thick muscles protected my body, and a firm bulge pressed angrily against my mound. My sex was wet, seeping liquid desire like his cock was thirsty, and my pussy was going to quench his needs.
Pushing the loose strands of hair away from my face, Porter held himself up, not allowing his body to put an ounce of weight on me. “Are you sure you want to do this? Because if not, now's the time to tell me. I can't promise I'll be able to stop if we go any further.”
Tugging on my bottom lip, I bit it hard. “Fuck me, just shut up and fuck me.” Squeezing my thighs against his waist, I wrapped my legs over his calves. “Or do you need me to take over? Because I can if you can't handle it.” Giggling, I smiled, running my nails up and down his back.
Letting out a quick chuckle, he tilted his head. “You just sealed your fate, Princess.” Driving his lips onto mine, Porter kissed me as he slid his hand over my breast.
Snapping my eyes shut, my mouth opened, exhaling fast as he teased my nipple. Plucking and twisting the hard bead, I felt his hips thrusting, rubbing his cock against my pussy.
It felt so good, that subtle motion. As light as it was, it was enough to set my skin on fire and make my pussy yearn for more. Pressing my heels into the bed, I pushed my ass up, forcing my hot center to hit his cock.