4
Ruby
I spend almost all night staring at the ceiling waiting for him to show his face. But after he closed his bedroom door only minutes after entering the house, he never emerged again. I didn’t even have to endure a night of his music.
I couldn’t decide if his avoidance of me was a good thing or not. Of course, I was glad that I didn’t have to look into his cold, evil eyes, but at the same time, I’ve still got our first meeting hanging over me.
Part of me wishes that he just stormed in here and had it out with me the second he arrived. Assuming he has anything to have out with me of course. While I’ve been here obsessing about our time together and unable to forget about him, he’s probably not thought of me twice. I was probably just another notch on his bedpost because I’d be stupid to think that I wasn’t just one easy girl in a line of many. He knew what he was doing that night. The way he touched me. There was no hesitation, no nerves. He knew my body almost better than I do myself. That isn’t the actions of a virgin, that’s for sure. He’s probably even a bigger manwhore than the guys on the team I’ve attempted to use since to get him the fuck out of my head.
Either that or I wanted him to blast that god-awful music so loud that I had no choice but to go in there and pull the fucking plug just to get some peace.
But as it was, the voices in my head were louder than anything he did, and I fucking hated him even more for it.
All night I wondered what he was doing, and more irritatingly if he was okay. I hated that I cared, but the guy had just lost his mom. I might want to rid him from my memory, but I’m not actually a horrible person and I can’t even begin to imagine what he’s going through right now.
By the time I did fall asleep, it was so late that when my alarm starts blaring, I can hardly pry my eyes open.
It’s still dark out when I finally do manage to rip them apart, just like it has been every other morning I’ve had to get up this early for practice.
Those people who think cheer is a joke of a sport, they damn well need to try this because right now, it’s anything but fun.
Everything aches as I push myself up to sit on the side of the bed. I’m fit, I work out and practice daily, but right now, Chelsea is pushing my limits, although I’m sure my lack of sleep probably doesn’t help in any way.
With my head still fuzzy from sleep, I throw myself into a cold shower to wake up.
My hair is still wet when I pull it into a braid down the back of my head and secure it with a Rosewood red band at the bottom. I drag on a pair of black leggings and a matching sports bra, followed by an oversized hoodie.
Everything else I might need for the day is shoved into my duffle.
I don’t bother turning the hallway light on as I step out of my room, despite my need to disturb him like he did so many times to me before, swelling inside.
Be the bigger person, Ruby, I tell myself as I silently walk past. There’s no light coming from the edges of his door, so I can only assume that he’s in there and sleeping.
My fingers twitch to reach out and see if I’m right, but I don’t. Instead, I make my way out of the house in the hope I haven’t woken anyone and drop down into my car.
I might have escaped his first morning but there’s no way I’m going to be able to avoid him forever.
The second I walk inside the locker room, Harley’s face drops at the sight of me.
“Rubes?” she asks, concern pulling her brows together.
“He’s here.”
“Fuck. What happened?” she asks, taking a seat on the bench beside me after I lower myself down.
“N-nothing.”
“So why do you look like you’ve been awake all night?”
“Because I have.”
“But—”
“He turned up on a motorcycle in the middle of the night. The engine must have woke me and I went to the window...”
“And then what?” she prompts when I trail off, once again lost in its dark stare despite the fact he’s not actually here.
“Then nothing. I went back to my room and he came up to his.”
Her lips part to say something, but no words come out for a few seconds. “So, you haven’t actually seen him?”
“No, not really.”
“Not gonna lie, Rubes. That was a bit of an anti-climax.”
“Fuck off,” I say, slapping her shoulder lightly.
“What? I was hoping he’d come barging into your room and hate fuck the shit out of you.”
“Jesus, Har. Been thinking about it much?”
She shrugs and doesn’t even have the decency to look a tiny bit guilty.
“What? He’s hot, do not deny that. I already know that you let him up in there.” She wiggles her brows. “And you’d totally do it again.”
“I would not,” I grumble, standing to change my shoes.
“You so would. That’s why you haven’t been with anyone else.”
“W-what?” I ask, my movements pausing at her statement.
“Oh, come off it, Rubes. You’ve had a million offers to rid you of your V-card since he left, hell knows you’ve flaunted it about enough.”
“Again, what?” I ask, my irritation levels growing faster than usual with my lack of sleep.
“You don’t need me to tell you how you’ve been since he left. You’re not that stupid.”
All the air rushes out of me as I fall down onto the bench once again, but I don’t look at Harley, I can’t. I know exactly what she’s talking about and I’m not exactly proud of the person I’ve become in the last few months. But partying, drinking, guys, they all helped me numb the pain, dampen down the memories of him.
“I don’t just want to lose it with a player who’s been with half the girls in this school, Har. I thought you, of all people, understood that.”
“I do, Rubes. I also don’t think that waiting for him is a good idea.”
I jump up from the bench and turn on her. “I’m not waiting for him,” I snap, suddenly totally over this conversation. “I don’t want him, Har. I don’t want him in my house, I don’t want him anywhere near me.”
“I know, but—”
“No. There is not a but here. He is nothing to me.” She raises a brow and stares at me. I can practically hear her thoughts though and it’s as amusing as hearing the words out loud. “Stop it. Just stop it.”
“Just trying to help.”
“Are you though?” I mutter, shoving my hoodie into my bag and walking toward the gym where Chelsea is waiting. “How does she look so good? Shouldn’t she be exhausted or whatever, growing a person?”
“No idea, but it looks good on her.”
Her eyes scan over us before they lock onto mine. My heart drops knowing that she can see my exhaustion.
“Ruby, over here.”
I groan as Harley walks toward the mats to start warming up.
“You still going to tell me everything is fine?” Chelsea asks, her eyes bouncing between mine.
I blow out a breath. “Everything is fine. My stepdad’s ex died in a car crash on the weekend, his son has moved in,” I admit, feeling like I owe her some kind of truth. She seems genuinely concerned about me, after all.
“Okay,” she muses for a second and I can’t help smiling that she didn’t go with the standard ‘I’m sorry for your loss’ like everyone else seems to if I mention it. Sure, I’m gutted for Ashton, and Stephen to a point, it’s clear he still cares about his ex, but I never met her. “Is he going to be an issue?” she asks, correctly guessing what—or who—kept me up last night.
Chelsea wasn’t here during Halloween, she was off on her ‘time out’ as she puts it. But I already know she’s recognized the change in me. This isn’t the first time she’s pulled me aside and questioned where my head is at.
I deserve the questions and judgment. I have been a mess and doing everything I can to put him behind me, but sadly it’s easier said than done. Especially now.
“I hope not.”
She smiles at me sadly like she already knows how much he fucks up my head. Maybe she does. We all know that she’s had her fair share of drama when it comes to guys.
“Don’t let him take this away from you, Ruby. You’ve worked too damn hard for a guy to fuck it all up.”
“I know,” I mutter.
“Nationals are two weeks away. Just two weeks. If you think you can’t do this, then you need to tell me now.”
“I’ve got this, Chels,” I promise her.
“Okay. Good. You’ve got a bright cheer future ahead of you, don’t let anyone take that from you.”
“I won’t.” I hold her eyes steady. She knows what I want. The words haven’t passed my lips. Only Harley and Poppy know my dream, but she senses it. I think deep down, we’re the same and she sees that as much as I do.
“Good. We’re gonna fucking smash nationals and I’m going to be able to hand over a winning squad at the end of the season.” She nods at me and rubs her hand over her growing belly.
“We’ve got this.”
“Good, now get out there and warm up. We’re not leaving this gym for class until we’ve nailed this routine, ladies,” she shouts louder so the entire squad hears her.
“Everything okay?” Harley asks when I stop beside her and start stretching.
“Yep, all good.”
“Rubes?” Chelsea calls, coming to a stop in front of me.
“Yeah.”
“You need help with that situation. You know the team is behind you should you need... any persuasion.”
My stomach twists at her unspoken words. Do I want to set Jake, Ethan, and Zayn on Ashton for hurting me? Hell yeah, I do. But I won’t. I fight my own battles. I refuse to cower behind anyone. Plus, I already have a feeling that the second Stephen insists on him starting here, that he’s going to make his own enemies before too long. He doesn’t need me to make that job any easier for him.
Practice is brutal, school is long and followed by putting my aching ass through another two hours of torture via Chelsea’s orders.
By the time I stagger back into the locker room after Chelsea calls time, I’m about ready to sleep for a week. But the reality is that in just twelve hours I’ll be getting up to do it all over again. I just hope I get some sleep tonight.
“So, what’s the plan?” Harley asks, sounding a little too awake for my liking as she tugs off her leggings ready to head for the shower.
“The plan? I’m supposed to have a plan” I practically crawl onto the bench, more than willing to have a little nap here.
“Yeah. You need a plan.”
“Well, I could move in with you and never go home ever again.”
“That’s it, take the pussy way out.”
“Har, I’m so tired right now, I literally don’t care.”
“Nah, uh-uh. Not happening.” I watch as she shoves her hand into her purse and pulls her cell out. “Hey, you busy? Okay, good. Meet us at Ruby’s in thirty, yeah?”
I stare at Harley, hoping like hell she’s talking to Poppy and not dragging anyone else into the mess that is my life.
“Har, you for real right now?” I complain the second she hangs up.
“Yep. I’m not letting you drag your sorry ass home with no fight in you. You want to go head-to-head with this asshole, then you need some backup. I’m going to shower, then we’re going to yours. To chill or something.”
Lying back on the bench, I watch as she grabs what she needs and heads toward the showers with most of the rest of the squad.
“Is it always this hardcore?” Stella asks once it quiets down a bit.
I crack an eye open and look at her. She’s not been here all that long, but the second she auditioned to be a part of the squad, Chelsea snapped her up.
“Nah, it’s just nationals. Chelsea really wants to prove herself. I get it, I’d be the same in her position.”
“I guess. I’ve been in more squads than I care to count in the past few years, but none of them have been quite like this.”
“That’s because none of them are the best,” Chelsea happily adds as she joins us.
“Not showering today, Ruby?” she asks with amusement.
“Nah, thought I’d just stink. You know, keep him away and all that.”
“Riiight. Good luck with that. From experience, it probably won’t work, but whatever. See you in the morning.” She waves at the two of us before walking toward the exit.
“Chels,” I call before she disappears.
“Yeah.” She looks over her shoulder. Her makeup is flawless, her dark hair smooth and sleek. She really is stunning and talented to boot. A little jealousy stirs in my belly. She’s also got the nicest boyfriend. I want to hate her, I just can’t.
“Thank you.”
“Anytime. You know where I am. Adios.”
“She’s... really something.”
“I know, right.”
“There aren’t many high school girls who could train you guys as she has. I swear I’ve only seen Miss Kelly about three times since I started here.”
“It’s a good thing we’ve got Chelsea, or we wouldn’t stand a chance.”
“What’s going to happen when she graduates?”
I shrug because, despite my dreams, I honestly have no idea.
It’s almost an hour later when I pull up in my driveway, quickly followed by Harley. Poppy is here as promised, sitting on the front step.
“Why didn’t you use the spare key?” I ask, noticing she’s got her coat pulled around her in an attempt to keep her warm.
She nods toward the new addition to our driveway. “That his?”
“Uh... yeah. Fair enough. I don’t want to go inside either.”
“That’s why we’re here, we’ve got your back, Rubes.”
“You just want to ogle him in real life,” I mutter to Harley as I pull my key from my bag to let us in.
As we step inside, music booms from somewhere in the house.
“I guess he’s awake now then.”
Rolling my eyes at Harley’s obvious statement, I swing the door closed and move toward the stairs.
I need to shower before anything else happens.
My eyes linger down the hall, but the second I start climbing, my legs start to speed up with my need to get to the safety of my bedroom.
“Order us pizza while I shower.”
“Rubes, we shouldn’t be—”
“Really?” I bark. I’m so tired I really don’t need a lecture about what I’m eating. I just need food... carbs.
“Okay, okay, I’m ordering now.” She rolls her eyes at me and pulls her cell from her pocket.
“Thank you.”
The shower isn’t half as relaxing as I was hoping with the knowledge that he’s here somewhere. The house isn’t overly big, so it’s not like I’m going to be able to successfully hide from him forever.
I know I need to just pull up my big girl panties and go and get it over with, but I really, really don’t want to.
“Better?” Poppy asks when I emerge from my bathroom in a pair of sweats and a crop top, my wet hair hanging around my shoulders.
“I just want to dive headfirst into that.” I nod at my bed that they’re both sitting on.
“Not until you’ve got this done. Are you really going to wear that?” Harley asks, dropping her eyes down my body.
“Um... yeah. I don’t give a shit what he thinks. I don’t want him, remember.”
“Oh yeah, sorry.” She winces but she can’t wipe the smile off her face.
“You’re a pain in my ass, Harley Hunter.”
“What? He’s hot. Hey,” she complains when Poppy hits her with a pillow.
“I would say if you want him, have at it, but he’s a prick and I wouldn’t wish him on my worst enemy, let alone one of my best friends so...”
“I can look though, right?”
I shake my head at her. “Eat your heart out.”
They both chat away as I blow
-dry my hair and apply just a little makeup. I might not want to look good for him but equally, I don’t really want the dark shadows under my eyes on full display either.
The doorbell rings right as I finish.
“Perfect timing, I’m starving.”
I grab a zip-up hoodie to throw over my shoulders and run from the room, the prospect of hot cheesy pizza gets me moving.
I practically snatch the boxes out of the poor guy’s hands before slamming the door in his face and turning to the kitchen, Harley and Poppy hot on my tail.
My stomach rumbles as I round the corner into the kitchen, but the second I look up, I come to a grinding halt, both Harley and Poppy crash into my back.
“What the... oh my God,” Harley breathes as she gets a look at the scene before us.
Ashton is standing shirtless and covered in a sheen of sweat in front of the refrigerator, drinking orange juice straight from the carton.
I never saw him shirtless when he was here before, I was the only one who bared everything, but I’m starting to realize that I might just have missed out because Harley has a point, he is fine.
Despite the fact he must know he has company, he doesn’t stop. Much to Harley’s delight.
“Suddenly, I don’t care so much if he’s an asshole.”
He must hear her words because he lowers the carton and places it back inside before swinging the door shut and turning his eyes on me.
My breath catches as our gazes lock. His eyes are as cold and angry as I remember, and they send the same shiver of fear down my spine as they did before.
A smirk curls at one side of his lips before his eyes drop from mine in favor of my body. My blood heats the second he begins checking me out. I hate that I react to him. My fists curl and my teeth grind.
By the time he gets back up to my eyes, his smirk is spread wide across his face and it only infuriates me further.
“Have you about finished?” I ask, suddenly finding my voice and wrapping the front of my hoodie around myself to cover up with the hand not full of pizza.
“Oh, little one, I’ve barely started.”
Tingles erupt within me at his use of his little nickname for me. But as much as I hate it, I remember all too well how it sounded falling from his lips right before he... no. Nope. Do not go there.
FURY: A Dark High School Bully Romance (Rosewood High Book 6) Page 3