by Cee, DW
“Have you been to Tuscany?”
“Yeah…it was the most beautiful place I’ve ever visited. I want to go back and hear Andrea Bocelli sing in some open meadow.” Feeling so at ease, I rattled off one of my dreams. I looked out the window and fantasized being in such a place with Jake—traveling together…possibly growing old together.
“A kiss for your thoughts?” Jake woke me up from my reverie.
I waited.
“Well?” An uneasy smile tugged at his lips.
“Where’s the promised kiss?”
He lifted our interlocking hands and brought them to his lips.
“I was admiring all the unique architecture.” Not confident enough to describe my fantasy, I stated a blasé fact.
“That’s it?”
“My answer was about as exciting as that kiss you just gave me.” I hid my smile by facing the scenery through the passenger window.
Before I knew what was happening, he grabbed me and gave me a full-blown kiss with his eyes on the road. The car swerved a bit. It took me awhile to regain the composure I’d lost after that embrace.
“Well? Shouldn’t that kiss elicit a better answer?”
I had to laugh. “I thought it would be nice to go back to Tuscany…” I would see what he’d try next in order to get the rest of my answer.
The next kiss I got off the side of the road was too indecent to put into words. My cheeks stayed blushed for a long while after the kiss was done.
“…with you when I’m old and gray…” Leaving everything hanging, I didn’t dare look him in the eye for a while.
The smug look on Jake’s face made me uncomfortable, so I changed the subject. “It’s so beautiful up here. Are we spending the whole day here?”
“Would you like to?” he asked with a smile.
“Sure. But I don’t really care where as long as we’re together.” This statement erased the insecure look Jake had been wearing since he saw Max appear from my guest bedroom. I took advantage of the stop light and leaned over to return the kiss he bestowed on me just a few minutes ago. “I’m really happy to be here with you,” I whispered. A myriad of honking car horns broke our embrace reprimanding us to keep driving.
Our lips unwillingly parted.
Jake eventually parked the car on the side of a beautiful two-story house. I knew exactly where we were.
We were at one of the world’s greatest, three Michelin-starred restaurants!
“How did you get us a table here on such short notice?”
“You know where we are?” he asked without a hint of surprise. “I had to pull favors from a few people last night. I didn’t know till we landed in SFO that we’d gotten a reservation,” he explained as we got seated right away.
My dream restaurant sat on a gracious piece of land. What looked to be a two-story brick house was comprised of offices on the second level and the restaurant on the bottom. There was a small courtyard and an organic garden, which most likely supplied all their greens. It was visually stunning. I assumed it would be no less than a sensory treat for the palate.
“How did you know this was my dream restaurant destination? I can’t believe we’re here! Thank you, Jake.”
“The foodie that you are, how could I not know?” Though he formed it as a question, he meant it as a statement.
This thoughtful man brought me to the one destination I’d been longing to visit. How could I not appreciate the heart behind the action?
Lunch began with an amuse bouche—the legendary salmon tartare cornets, a savory black sesame seeded cone filled with salmon tartare and red onion crème fraîche. Enjoying every bite of this teaser course, the inquisition began.
“Jake, tell me about your family. I can’t wait to meet them.”
“Well, as you know, I’m the oldest of three kids. My sister below me, Jane, is a senior in law school right now. Nick, the youngest is a senior in undergrad, and the real genius in our family. Most likely med school is in his near future but it’s a bit up in the air. He’s talented in so many ways, he’s torn about what to do with his life. He’s also the foodie in the family. You two will get along well.”
“Did you all go to the same school?” I asked while slurping my oyster with caviar.
“Jane actually went to undergrad up here. She’s the black sheep of the family,” he joked.
“Huh? I don’t understand.”
“My grandfather, my dad, his brothers, most of their wives, and we children all went to the same school. Gramps made a lot of money in real estate and was a generous man, as he donated much of it. My sister liked the convenience of his money, but not the notoriety it sometimes brought. So, she decided to come up here and then go live in New York. The rest of us were not as brave or as creative.“You’re quite the homogenous group.”
“Boring is a better definition.”
“You must have been a hot commodity at school. The girls must have thrown themselves at you to become a part of your family,” a hint of jealousy noted my voice.
“I suppose, but I never met anyone that made me want to settle down…” he trailed off. “After med school, residency was at Valley Hospital, and since then I’ve been at General Hospital, thanks to the chief selecting his nephew over hundreds of applicants.”
“Is the name Reid the reason why we got a table here today as well?”
He seemed abashed as he confessed that one of his uncles was an investor in many restaurant ventures.
“I guess I’ve had it pretty easy all my life. But, my parents encouraged us to work hard.”
“Excellent! Good-looking, hard-working, and great earning potential,” I joked. “You’re definitely a keeper!”
“OK, now your turn. Tell me everything.”
Before giving my autobiography, I quickly savored the third course—cured hamachi belly.
“It’s not too exciting. It’s probably more tragic than anything else. I was born in Texas and spent most of my childhood there. My dad was a structural engineer, and he died when I was in eighth grade. He was at a job site for the city when a part of the building fell on him. He died instantly,” I explained.
“I’m so sorry! I didn’t realize that you were that young when your father passed away.”
“Well, the story gets worse, so hold that thought.” I sighed. “After my dad died, my mom and I came to LA to live with my grandparents. My mom had never worked before so she held odd jobs here and there, and we lived modestly. Mom missed Dad terribly, and she was never truly happy again after his death. This was hard on me because I felt the need to be happy around her, always. It was my job to lift her spirits up. During my senior year in high school, my mom died of a heart attack. That’s what the doctor’s told me, but I think she died more of a broken heart.”
Jake reached out and put his hands over mine when he saw the tears forming. He comforted me with a loving smile. “Oh, Emily…that must have been very painful.”
My heart warmed, knowing his thoughts were genuine. I composed myself and finished telling Jake that my grandparents passed away a few years ago from old age, and how I’ve been on my own pretty much since my senior year in high school.
“How did you pay for college and living expenses? How did you buy a house already?”
Our server filleted a whole-roasted turbot, along with an interesting burnt lemon for squeezing, and placed some on both our plates while I explained a bit more about myself. “I guess underneath this weak frame, I have a survival mentality. Tutoring young kids since my sophomore year in high school brought in decent money to pay for living expenses, and tuition was covered through grants and financial aid. I worked a lot in undergrad and saved all my money. There wasn’t much of a need to spend any of it. Plus, when my grandparents passed away, they left me their condo. I sold it and added that money to my already growing pot. One day it occurred to me I could put a down payment on a small house, so I decided to try, and next thing I knew,
I was a homeowner. So that’s the story of my life till now.”
Though my life’s story was covered in three courses, there was more that Jake wanted to hear and understand.
“Can I ask you about your relationship with Max? Do you mind telling me?”
Jake’s serious face told me that he was wary of my answer, but he also seemed quite intent on knowing everything about me. Hoping for a deeper relationship, I didn’t want to keep anything from him. He gave me more peace in my heart than I had felt in a long time. I could tell that this was a man who would complement my life entirely, if I’d allow myself to love him. My heart wanted to give it a try.
“Tell me everything. Don’t worry about what I might think or feel. I also would like to know what happened with you and Max last night, if you don’t mind.”
I hesitated, wondering how much of myself to reveal. Would he want to know the whole truth about Max and me? My answer would hopefully add another dimension to our promising relationship.
“Max and I met our freshman year in college. It was absolute love at first sight for both of us.”
“Lucky guy!” Jake interrupted. “So what about him did you like so much?”
I instantly laughed at this question. “You guys are both so funny.”
“What do you mean?”
“Max asked me the same question last night. He asked what about you I liked so much.”
“So what did you tell him?”
“I think I’ll keep you guessing on that one.” I winked.
“Max and I met in the cafeteria of our freshmen dormitory and we immediately started hanging out. Because I felt so alone after my mom died, I happily accepted the chemistry between us. There was this crazy bond that formed, and we couldn’t stay away from one another. We didn’t declare our feelings for one another till after the first month, but it was obvious to everyone around us that we were a couple. We spent our entire college life inseparable. I thought we were going to get married. The only thing that was a hindrance was the fact that Max wasn’t the most motivated of students. He was super smart, but he didn’t know what he wanted to do with his life and this bothered both of us. Although we had no idea how he would support a family, if it came to that, we were so in love, we didn’t care.”
With my every sentence, Jake’s expression turned from curious to somber. He was hurt by my fervent accounts of our college years.
“I’m sorry, Jake. You didn’t need to hear all of that. I got a bit carried away.” I apologized repeatedly.
“No, it’s all right. I asked for it,” he stated with a bit of masochistic chivalry. “Continue…”
At this point, I wavered between taking a bite of steak from Japan or continuing my saga with Max. Seeing Jake’s anxious face, the beef needed to wait.
“Well, there’s not much more to say. On graduation day, Max appeared nervous all day and tried to avoid me, so I thought he was going to ask me to marry him. Instead, after the ceremony, he broke up with me, giving some excuse about not being ready for a serious commitment. Just like that, he let go of four years and the bond that I thought could never be broken…broke.”
Jake could see the pain on my face. I didn’t know how to explain to him that this feeling left in my heart was not love, but hurt. I wanted Jake to believe it was over between Max and me, and that I had finally let go of the past—if not entirely, almost entirely.
Jake tried to break up my glum mood and asked me again about Max’s question from last night.
“Well, I told Max how comfortable I feel with you. I feel protected and secure, and I can be myself with you. Although I’ve only known you for a short while, it’s like you’ve been with me my whole life. I don’t know. It’s a bit strange but you’re the only person, aside from my parents, who makes me feel entirely comfortable. I can’t quite explain this. Max got very angry with me last night when I told him this.”
“You mean you’ve never felt entirely comfortable with Max?”
“With Max, I was always trying to please him. My whole world revolved around him. I think I was infatuated with him. Max appeared at a time in my life when I had nobody but my grandparents. My parents were gone and I didn’t have any siblings. Max not only became my boyfriend, but he also became my only family. I think I smothered him. Maybe I was a borderline stalker. That’s probably why he eventually broke up with me.”
We both got a good laugh.
“You want to know the hardest part about this breakup?”
Jake appeared wary again.
“I guess I’m going to tell you regardless. All the loves in my life left me without any warning—my dad, my mom, and Max. I don’t think I ever loved anyone as much as I loved these three people, and I felt abandoned by all of them.” The tears hovered again. “I had a tough year and a half letting go. I had lost four years of my life.”
“Are you sure you’re over Max?” Jake lamented, “Do I want to know?”
“Last night, Max apologized for hurting me. He reassured me that he loved me as much as I loved him while we were dating, and that I wasn’t the only one hurting after the breakup. His apology came off a bit contrived since he started dating Jennifer within a month of our breakup. I accepted his apology and decided that this finally closed the Max and Emily chapter. So to answer your question, yes I am over him, but four years is hard to erase.”
Initially, Jake looked wholly tentative. He still didn’t quite believe I was over Max. After last night, he had credible reason not trust me. Still, I hoped he would want to give me and us a chance. With Max, as much as I’d hoped, I never truly believed that we would be together till the very end. But with Jake, there was an inexplicable sense of completeness, an unbreakable connection, like he was meant to be in my life—like he would always be a part of my life.
Attempting to take the spotlight off myself, I asked Jake about some of the girls he’d dated. This would also give me a chance to eat my dessert—a hot, creamy chocolate cake sitting atop a pool of bittersweet dark chocolate sauce, and below a house made cinnamon ice cream. What decadence!
“It seems hardly fair that I’ve given you details of my one love yet I haven’t heard any details of the loves in your life. I’m sure there have been many women in your life. Tell me everything.”
“I had a few girlfriends, but I haven’t dated much since I got to General Hospital.”
“Oh, that doesn’t surprise me. With your insane schedule, how could you have a life? I’m surprised we’ve come this far.”
“Kelley and I dated on and off for years. Our families knew each other since we were little, because both our dads were doctors at the same hospital. It seemed a bit incestuous since our families were such close friends. I think our parents thought we’d get married.”
“So what happened?”
“I went off to med school, she went off to business school, and it was too difficult to have a long-distance relationship. We tried several times to get back together but failed.”
“I assume she went to school with you? Did you date her all throughout undergrad?”
“Actually, she didn’t, and even during undergrad she and I dated on and off.”
“What made your relationship so tentative?”
“I liked her very much and I suppose I loved her at one point but I never thought that she was the one.”
“What does she look like?” I immediately regretted asking this, as it seemed like a petty question, but curiosity got the better of me.
“She’s not nearly as beautiful as you are,” Jake said with the most adoring look. I blushed and changed the subject.
After two amuse bouches, nine courses of gastronomic extravagance, and free-flowing wine, we were done with our meal. Time had sped by. With each course, I fell deeper and deeper for a man whose candor and sincerity proved a reciprocity of feelings. In a matter of three hours there was no doubt we would be in a solid relationship.
To my utter deli
ght, the chef and owner graciously visited our table and talked with us about our meal and his restaurant. Asking what my favorite dish was during lunch, I happily answered, “Moulard duck foie gras, the kuroge sirloin and risotto with white truffles…mmm. Anything with white truffles!”
Both men laughed as Jake was warned, “She’s got expensive taste.”
“Don’t I know it!” he answered with a wink.
We got an inspiring tour of the restaurant. It’s all about finesse emblazoned the walls of his spotless kitchen with copper pots hanging from the ceiling. All the chefs and sous chefs worked busily to prepare each course with seamless effort and efficiency. The attention to detail marked this restaurant as the top dining place in the world. Every dish that went out looked spotless. My eyes darted from the salad station to the meat station to the pastry station. I wanted to jump in and work with them but Jake pulled me in his arms and led me out of the kitchen so they could continue working. We thanked the staff for an incredible meal, and Jake mentioned visiting his New York restaurant next time he was there. Secretly, I hoped I would be there as well.
We headed down Highway 29 toward the city for the second half of our day. It was probably 2:00p.m. or so, and I felt this lazy urge to take a nap. Jake pulled into a high rise and parked the car. I wondered where we were, but got no explanation. Staring at him gave no clues, but there was only that knowing and annoying grin. Jake opened the door to a beautiful apartment overlooking the San Francisco Bay, juxtaposed between the Ferry building and AT&T Park. It was furnished in a comfortable shabby chic style. I looked at him again for an explanation.
“This apartment belongs to our family. My parents used to come up to the Bay Area all the time when Jane was at school and hoped that Nick would come to school up here as well. I thought we would rest a little before our dinner and show.”
“Dinner? Show? How can you eat again after nine courses?” I asked. “There’s no way I can eat again today. I am so full. Besides, I have nothing to wear to attend any shows up here. What are we going to watch?”
“You’ll see,” he answered with a funny grin. “Don’t worry. I’ve taken care of everything. Let’s hang out for a couple of hours. I, too, am stuffed.”