by Cee, DW
I sat on the breakfast table and held back the tears. Yes, my heart broke, but I wasn’t going to cry over some idiotic misunderstanding, solely on my part. Rather than crying over spilt milk, or more aptly stated, an unnecessarily plated dinner, I took out a bowl and started mixing ingredients for a cake. I’d be damned if Donovan Taylor was going to ruin my night.
2 1/2 cups of cake flour—measured and in
1 1/2 cups of sugar—also in the bowl
1 tsp. baking soda—added
I went down the dry ingredient list, sifted everything together, and then I mixed all the wet ingredients together. I was perfectly fine till I tried to mix the dry ingredients into the wet and the hand blender went psychotic and splattered batter all over me, the cabinets, the floor, the counter—and this is where I lost it. The tears rolled down out of frustration. Frustrated with my cake, frustrated with him, and frustrated with myself, I cleaned up the mess and started over again.
The cleaning took forever, but the cake turned out beautifully. I cut out all different-sized heart shapes of the red velvet cake, sliced them in half, and filled them with the cream cheese frosting. After sprinkling them with powdered sugar, they looked picture-perfect. Most of them sat on Emily’s antique cake platter, but I took two for myself and poured water in the coffee maker so I could feast on these beauties.
“Hey!” I jumped when I heard a man’s voice. “Why didn’t you lock the door behind me?”
“Hey...” I don’t know why, but my broken heart felt like it was breaking some more. “Give me a sec?” I ran to the upstairs’ bathroom and calmed my racing heart. Gawwwd! I was such a loser! Why couldn’t I act nonchalant whenever he was around? Why couldn’t I be cool like Jane? Those two had such a great friendship.
“You’re back,” he said with a mouth full of a heart-shaped mini-cake. “These are delicious.”
“Thanks,” I answered while pouring him my cup of coffee before he choked on the cake. “Why are you here?”
“I came back for cake.”
“But you didn’t know I was baking a cake. How could you come back for it?”
He smiled and shoved the second piece of cake in his mouth. “Have you had dinner?” His gentle ways almost broke me again. Why’d he have to be so sweet when he didn’t mean anything by it? “Have you?” he repeated.
“No, not really. I was going to fill my calories with cake, instead.”
“Then let’s eat.” He got up and brought over a bag filled with boxes of food. Without me having to ask, he explained, “I had a dinner date with some friends, but after a drink, I thought I may enjoy having dinner with you instead.”
He made that statement with enough hesitation to make me think he felt sorry for me. That’s not what I wanted from Donovan Taylor. I’d rather he be out with other women, men, whatever—than feel sorry for me.
“You didn’t have to come back. I would’ve been all right without you.” I answered with a forced bravado.
“I know.” He said with a genuine smile. “I wanted to come back.”
That was all he was willing to say.
“You two are having a late dinner.” Emily and Jake walked in and Emily looked worn out from her night out.
“Did you have a fun time?” I asked. “Is Mario Batali as amazing as he appears on TV?”
“He’s even more fun and creative. I had a wonderful time, but I think it’s past my bedtime. I’ll see you in the morning?” She hugged and kissed Donovan on the cheek first, then came over and hugged and kissed me as well. “Thank you for taking care of my children.” She waved good night with those words and left us.
“Emily did OK with all that food?”
“You know, Laney, in hindsight, a cooking lesson at this stage of her pregnancy wasn’t the brightest idea.”
“It’s not as though you had any clue she was going to be pregnant when you bought this package.”
“True.” He laughed. “She kept getting green every time Mario brought out raw meat or fish, and she was trying so hard to cover up her nausea. Even in the car, she refused to admit she didn’t have a good time.”
“She doesn’t want you worrying so much about her. Emily is incredibly grateful for everything you do for her. She’s always talking about you as the most ideal husband.”
“I don’t come close to being ideal when compared to Emily. I don’t know what I would have done had I not found her in Japan.”
“All that matters is that you found her.” I told Jake with mixed emotions. Of course I was happy for my cousin and his wife, but I was sad for myself because I couldn’t envision this kind of happiness in my life—at least not while I was still pining away for Donovan Taylor.
“I’m going to go up and make sure my wife is OK. Can you two lock up behind you?”
“Sure, Jake. I’m going to leave soon, too. If you’re done?” I asked Donovan and offered to take his plate to the sink.
Donovan walked me home in silence. It was a weird night that started out promising, then turned abysmal, only to be brightened again. I didn’t appreciate these mood swings. I was trying so very hard not to fall for Donovan Taylor again, but it was impossible not to when he was in my life this often.
“What’s on your mind, Delaney?”
“Nothing.”
“The creases between your brows speak differently,” he said while smoothing out these creases with his thumb.
“I was thinking about Jake and Emily.”
“What about them?”
“Just how perfect they are for one another, and whether or not I’ll find that kind of perfection in my own life.” I’d offered too much information, but I couldn’t help it. So many of these “days of love” passed me by and through every one of them, I’d wondered whether I’d ever spend this day with Donovan. This year I had, but it was just as lonely as all the other ones I’d spent alone.
His face gentled. I’d seen and memorized all his looks, but this was a new one. Was this a look he gave to that special woman in his life, or was this a look he gave his little sisters when they were heartbroken over some guy?
“Who could possibly resist loving you?” His thumbs moved over my eyebrows and were now caressing my cheekbone. “You are damn near perfect yourself, Miss Delaney Reid. Any man who doesn’t recognize this would be a fool.”
Then what does that make you, Donovan?
February 18, 2013 Dr. Delaney Reid?
I got it! I got a regular business-sized envelope from my first choice medical school—the only medical school I applied to—and my hands were shaking from excitement. Running to Emily’s, I wanted to share the news with someone.
“I got it!”
“What is that?” Emily asked, carrying both babies in her arms while holding one in the belly.
“James. Come to me.” I held out my arms for him so I could give Emily a hand. Surprisingly, Ellie jumped into my arms.
“James just took a spill on the kitchen floor, so he needs a little extra attention from his mama. He still adores you, Laney.”
“Did you fall?” I asked James, and made him cry again. “Don’t cry, big boy. You’ll be all right.” I kissed him on his forehead.
Ellie patted my cheeks with her chubby hands and screamed, “Me!” so I kissed her chubby cheeks many times over. She giggled in glee.
“What’s in that envelope, Laney?”
“It’s either an acceptance or rejection letter to the one med school I applied to last fall.”
“Med school? I didn’t know you applied to med school!”
“No one knows. Everyone thinks I only applied to film school, but I thought I’d take my chances and do both.”
“Why haven’t you told anyone?”
“I didn’t want the pressure from the family. I’m double majoring in English and chemistry, and I didn’t want to let Dad down if I didn’t get in. It was a long shot.”
“Well? What are you waiting for? Open it!�
�� Emily was as excited as I was.
I ripped open the envelope, and sure enough, it was an acceptance letter! I jumped up and down—as much as I could with a baby in my hands. “I got in.” I announced and gave Emily and the kids a big hug.
“I’m so proud of you, Laney! You are such a remarkable woman.” Emily continued to hug me and said, “Now are you going to tell everyone?”
“No. I’m going to wait a bit. I don’t want any pressure. If the school will allow me to defer, I’m going to sit on it for about a year and decide which graduate program I want to attend. This is a decision I’ll have to live with the rest of my life. And as much as I love and respect my parents, I can’t let them decide for me.”
“Good for you. So when will you tell them?”
“Maybe on graduation day. I have a chance at graduating summa cum laude if I keep my grades up second semester. I’m going to surprise my parents on both accounts.”
“Wow! I hope my little girl will be as bright and confident as you are, Laney Reid. Congratulations!”
“Thank you. I’m off to talk to the Dean and see if he’ll allow me to defer for one year, and I also have to beg him not to tell Dad.”
“You do that.”
“Can I ask you to keep this secret from Jake?”
“Your secret is safe with me.” She hugged and kissed me one last time.
Wow! Dr. Delaney Reid. I’m kinda digging that moniker!
February 20, 2013 Alone on the Diamond
It was pathetic how lonely I was on the diamond without Donovan Taylor catching for me. He was on a business trip and I couldn’t believe how alone I felt. William did a great job as catcher, and we soundly beat the IM team from across town, our biggest nemesis, but nothing about this evening felt right.
“Good game,” Eric said to us after Elle pitched the last inning. “You both pitched beautifully! We beat the toughest team, and this is only our second game. You ladies are going to win this season for us.”
“Thanks,” I answered with a laugh. “I guess you guys take this game pretty seriously, huh? And here I thought it was just an IM game. It’s not like we win anything.”
“It’s the pride factor, Laney. We don’t like to lose, and to lose to our cross-town rival is the worst!”
“Hey guys. Thanks to you and Elle, we had our best game, yet!” Kevin, too, was a little more excited than necessary.
“Thanks,” we both answered as we got our belongings together to head home.
“You want to go and have dinner?” William came out of nowhere and asked.
“I can’t tonight, but thank you for asking.”
“Is it because your keeper won’t let you go out with me?”
“Who’s my keeper?”
All the people answered at once. “Donovan Taylor.”
Much laughter ensued. “You guys are exaggerating. Donovan is a close friend of the family and he feels the need to act like my older brother when I am outside of the family wings. He is not my keeper, and he does not control my actions.”
“Then dinner...?”
“I really can’t tonight. I have work to do and a quiz to study for once I get home. Next game?”
“That’s a date!” Shoot! I wasn’t meaning for it to turn into a date. “See you next Wednesday?”
“Sure. See you next week.”
As we walked to Eric’s car, Elle had many opinions on who I should and should not “date.”
“Why would you go out with William when you have Donovan?”
“First of all, I’m not going out with William. We’ve had one date. And second of all, Donovan is not mine.”
“Uh-huh. You keep telling yourself that, and maybe one day you’ll believe your own words.”
“Whatever, Elle.” She had no clue how much I wanted Donovan to be “mine,” but that was only in my dreams.
“Your phone’s buzzing.” Eric chimed in.
I took out my phone to find the text that quenched my loneliness.
Did you pitch well today?
Yes. I had a good catcher for a change, so I did very well.
Just to piss him off, I had to add that part.
And who caught for you?
Not saying...
WHO WAS YOUR CATCHER?
Where are you and why are you bothering me?
NYC and you still haven’t answered me.
WILLIAM. Now go to bed, Mr. Taylor. I’m sure it’s past your bedtime! Good night.
Are you going straight home?
Yes
Good. See you soon, Little Girl.
Whatever! I didn’t answer him, but I did have a huge smile on my face after I put my phone away—a smile Elle and Eric did not miss as they commented, “Uh-huh!”
February 23, 2013 SURPRISE!
Thanks to Jane’s generosity, the Reid ladies all got a fabulous weekend away at the Montage Hotel in Laguna Beach. I don’t think I was on the original invite list, but Jane asked me to tag along, and I was grateful. Mom and Dad were away for the weekend, Doug went up to the ranch with all the Reid men, and I missed Donovan. I knew I had no right to miss him, but I did.
What are you up to, today? This was an unfamiliar number, which made me wonder...Donovan?
I’m down at the Montage for the night, thanks to Jane. What are you up to?
Who’s Jane? Montage at the beach or in Beverly Hills?
Who’s this? Who the hell was I texting if this wasn’t Donovan?
William. William?
Uh, hi.
Hey. I’m headed to OC myself today. I’m coming to see you if you’re at Montage in Laguna. I’ll be at there around four. See you then?
Shit. What was I going to say? I didn’t want to introduce him to the family.
Hello? Laney? You there?
Yeah. Um...I’m not sure about seeing you today. I’m here with my family and it’s a girls’ weekend.
Just an hour or so, Laney. I’ll buy you a cup of coffee, an iced tea, an ice cream cone—whatever. Let’s hang.
William, let’s just see each other tomorrow. I don’t think it’s cool of me to step out on a girls’ retreat. I’ll call you later? I need to go in for my first treatment.
Talk later...
“Wasn’t that wonderful, Gram? They really know how to spoil a girl at this resort.”
“You’re right, Laney. They do know how to spoil you.”
Gram and I were almost comatose after the massage.
“Gram, will you excuse me? I’ve got a voicemail on my phone.”
“Sure.”
This voicemail I retrieved left me with mixed emotions, leading more toward annoyance. William told me with no qualms that he was coming down to see me around 4:00pm and that we could stay right here and have a drink together. Since our last date, I’d been trying to distance myself from him. He wanted a relationship and didn’t listen to my protest of wanting to get to know him better. He was coming on stronger than I’d wished.
Even earlier than stated, William showed up at the pool before the male faction of my family surprised us with their appearance. After all the introductions were made we hung out a bit longer, but I dreaded the alone time with William. Sensing my discomfort, Doug suggested we all go out and Nick joined us for drinks in the lounge area. There actually was an upside to having an older brother who watched over me like a hawk. I’d have to thank Doug, later.
“Will you excuse me?” I was happy for the intrusion when my phone rang.
All the guys nodded, and I got up and went out to the large veranda for a breath of fresh air.
“Hey, Laney.” Surprisingly, Max called. “Any chance I can ask you for a huge favor?”
“Of course. Anything.”
“Since both Nick and Doug will not be staying tonight, could I ask you to switch rooms with me?”
Silly Max. He asked that question with way more hesitation than necessary. “Max, of course I’ll switch with
you. I’m sorry. I should have offered to room with my brother and cousin to begin with when they showed up. I’ll be down right now to move my stuff.”
“Thanks, Laney. You’re fantastic.”
This was my chance to leave William until dinner. Without asking my opinion, Jake had asked him to join us, and William accepted. My wonderful brother and Nick offered to hang out with William while I went and settled into my own room. My mind was cluttered with more jumbled-up emotions than I cared to admit. I dreaded dinner with the six of us, I dreaded the eventual conversation with William, and I missed Donovan. This was the longest I’d gone without seeing him since we started playing softball together. On the one hand, I despised these longings, again. I’d done well all throughout undergrad controlling the want, but it was back. On the other hand, my heart rejoiced every time I knew I’d be with him. This kind of whimsical happiness had left me a long time ago. Even if it was only a fairytale, I always saw myself as the princess to my handsome prince.
“Hello Miss Delaney. Don’t you look stunning tonight! What brings you to the Montage?” What? There was the voice that made my heart skip too many beats. What was he doing here? He was dressed so sharp, wearing a suit that made him look like he was a runway model for Armani. This man stepped out of my dreams and made me hold my breath many, many seconds longer than necessary.
He was standing right before me, and I wanted to run to him and feel his arms around me. I ‘d dressed for dinner early and walked up to the gorgeous lounge area so I could stare at the beach and dream about the man who probably never thought about me. And here he was... “Hello Mr. Taylor. You look very nice tonight as well. It’s nice to see you again.” I’m so happy to see you, Donovan. I missed you.
“What brings you here?”
“My family, as well as a date.”
“A date?” He cocked his head slightly looking surprised, and maybe slightly disappointed? No...that couldn’t be. “Who’s the lucky fellow? You never told me you were dating someone. Is it William?”