by Cee, DW
“You’re home early.” Emily embraced her Jake, and she, too, was on her husband’s lap.
“I don’t know why Emily and Laney find my heartfelt confession so funny.” I was seriously annoyed. “I was explaining that I believed I was in love with Bee, and I came looking for advice.”
"We all know this fact, already, Nicholas. It's you who's now coming into this revelation,” Laney explained.
“And you felt the need to tell us this rather than telling Bee because…” Donovan questioned. He was always the lawyer, picking apart my statements.
“I need help.”
“Well, you’ve come to the right place.” My brother announced, and started eating his wife’s cake. “How can we help you?”
“First of all, I don’t know what to do about my roommate situation. I didn’t mean for Lily to live with us, but it’s happened and I don’t know how to undo it.”
“You move back into Mom and Dad’s house?” Jake suggested.
“Let me explain why I fought this whole Bee Taylor, marriage and kids situation.”
“Please do!” My smartass cousin stated while rolling her eyes.
“Some of us are students with no prospects of a house or an income anytime soon. I don’t want to be one of those men, bumming off food and lodging from their women. I’d like to be more established before considering loving a woman. I can’t provide for her in any way for a very long time.”
“That’s stupid, Nick.”
“It might be stupid to you, Laney, but it’s not to me. It’s important to me that I can provide for a family, and I didn’t think I’d have to for a good ten years. I didn’t expect to find Bee and I didn’t think she’d have such a hold on me. I’ve tried to forget her but I can’t. The only person I see when I think down the road is Bee.”
“So, what you’re saying is that you want to have a home and an income before getting serious with Bee?” Donovan was dissecting my statement again. “Are you thinking you want to get married?”
“Marriage was not on my radar, but if that’s what Bee really wants, I want it too. But, not until I can at least pay for rent or groceries, or something. Having her do everything doesn’t sit well with me.”
“Nick,” Jake started while caressing his wife’s hand. Without a doubt, it was beautiful watching my brother and cousin-in-law adoring their wives. I’d admit now this is what I wanted in my own life. “I didn’t realize this bothered you so much. I feel bad that I’ve had it so easy.” My brother feeling bad for me was not what I wanted.
“I don’t begrudge you anything. I don’t covet your house, and I’m glad Jane and Donovan will carry on the AAP legacy. They will do a good job and make Grandfather proud.” This wasn’t to be a pity party for me. I just wanted advice and hopefully an angle I hadn’t considered.
“I know you’ve invested in AAP, and I’m told we have royalty checks coming soon. Won’t that be enough to pay some bills?” Jake looked to Donovan for answers.
“It should be a sweet amount, and you know Bee invested as well. Between both your checks you should be OK.”
“Yeah but she just opened up her business. I’m sure she’s up to her eyeballs in debt. I don’t want her to worry about taking care of her student-boyfriend who won’t add a dollar to the bottom line.”
“Nick.” Emily chided. “You’re a med student. When your brother was in med school, he had no income. Jane also lived off your parents’ generosity until she got a job with AAP. There’s nothing wrong with you or your situation.”
Donovan added, “Bee’s not in any debt. It’s a long story I’m sure she’ll explain to you, but she bought the warehouse free and clear and her loft is paid for—you both will be all right, financially. It’s not as if you’re not ever going to work and make money. You’ll just take longer than the average person. Bee won’t care. Why do you?”
“Bro’, most couples don’t start off with fairytale situations like we did. All that matters is that you love this woman and will treasure her and protect her with your life. If that’s how you feel about Bee, then let her know and see where that takes you.”
Emily and Laney nodded their heads in agreement. After the pep talk and debt-free revelation from my family, I felt a good portion of the weight lifted off my shoulders. After thanking my family, I left to take care of the rest of my loose ends.
“You’re finally home.” Sam greeted me. “How were finals?”
“Good. And yours?”
“You know I’m not the typical Reid. I struggled like hell, but I made it through and I’ll graduate.”
“Do you know where Lily is?”
“She and Doug went out to dinner.” We heard laughter coming from the living room. “I think they’re back.”
“Hey, stranger. How did everything go?” Lily asked.
She was standing next to Doug, and they both looked happy. Something about them also looked different. “Everything went well. I’m glad it’s all over.” I answered Lily. “When are you and Sam leaving for Italy?” I turned the question to Doug.
“I believe we are leaving next Thursday. We’ll get there on Friday, just in time for the wedding on Saturday.”
“Isn’t that cutting it a bit close?”
“Yeah, but no one needs us there any earlier.” Doug explained. “We all decided to go hang out at Laney’s beach house for a long weekend before we get to the wedding.” Doug was uncomfortable telling me all this. “You weren’t around and…I wasn’t sure what your plans were…you want to come with us?”
By the look on all three faces, I knew what I had to do was going to be easy. “I am leaving Sunday for the wedding, so you three go ahead and have a great time at the beach. You have a moment?” I asked Lily.
“Sure.” She looked at Doug and Sam, and followed me outside. “Is this about us planning this getaway without you?” Lily was needlessly worried.
“No.” I sat her on the ledge of the porch and started apologizing. “I’m sorry about my behavior the past few weeks. I know I’ve been an asshole, disappearing on you with very little explanation. I also know that I owe you an explanation about…”
“Stop!” Lily said kindly but forcefully. “You don’t owe me any explanation. I knew going into this relationship with you that you still had feelings for Bee. Curiosity got the better of me and my ego thought I could make you forget her. But, I wasn’t lying when I told you way back when that I wasn’t looking to get married. I wanted to see where things would go between us, and they obviously didn’t go very far. My ego is a little bruised, but I have no hard feelings against you or about us.”
This girl was definitely mature beyond her years and mine. “Are you sure I don’t owe you more of an explanation?”
“You owe me nothing. We tried, it didn’t work, end of story.” She smiled somewhat of an uncomfortable smile. “I knew when I saw you fly out of the house the night Bee got hurt that you were still very much in love with her. I won’t lie and say my feelings weren’t hurt, but I’m over it.”
Damn, this was easier than I thought. I had dreaded this conversation for weeks. “You can stay here with my cousins and I’ll move out so it won’t be awkward between us.” I offered.
“I hope it won’t be awkward between us regardless. With Sarah and Emily being so close, I’m sure I’ll see you at their home from time to time. I promise not to make voodoo dolls of you and Bee and perform a ten-pin ritual every night.” She giggled.
“I’d appreciate that.” I laughed with her.
“What will you do now? Does Bee know how you feel?”
“Not exactly. I’m going to take her to Italy with me, and hopefully I’ll get to explain all the crap that’s in my jumbled-up head.”
“Just be honest with her. Whatever the depth of your feelings for her, I believe she’ll return it.” Lily stretched out her hand and said, “Friends?”
I shook it with relief and thankfulness and agreed, “Friends!”
; With that chapter of my life closed, I drove to my last destination for the night. It was late, but I knew Bee wasn’t asleep yet. I only hoped Luke wasn’t with her.
Knocking on her door, I knew this was where I wanted to be, and Bee was the woman whom my future was with. I’d known this for years, but was only now able to admit it and act upon it.
“Bee. Hey.” I greeted her with hopes that she wasn’t going to ask me to leave.
“Nick.” She was surprised to see me. “What brings you by at this hour?”
“If I told you that I came to discuss our future, would I be welcomed here?”
May 26, 2014 BEE: “Just The Way You Are” ~Bruno Mars
Walking through the garment district in New York, I tried to compartmentalize what had happened to us.
Us—Nick and Bee.
It was weird thinking that there was even a Nick and Bee. And in all honesty, I still wasn’t convinced.
Nick came over Thursday night, and told me we were heading to Florence via New York and London. With my back still out of commission, he had Missy set up necessary business meetings in New York and London, so we’d stop in each city for a few days and eventually land in Florence. This way, my back wasn’t taxed, I got business done, and we were able to relax—together.
“What are you thinking about so deeply?”
My head shook itself when I thought about this man walking with me, an arm full of samples. We landed late last night and he offered to help me with all my errands today in exchange for a free day tomorrow.
“Us,” was all I could say.
Nick, with his signature grin, was my errand boy—true to his word. We covered a lot of ground and everything was done by dinnertime.
“Should we go out to eat or should we head back to the apartment?” I needed to lie down badly after all the work I’d done today. “How about we order something once we get back home?” He caught on to my fatigue.
I was grateful for the big bathtub in the tiny Soho apartment. While Nick perused menus and ordered dinner, I took a hot bath and tried to loosen up my back. After the flight last night, Nick gently massaged my swollen back and insisted I sleep on him. Sleeping on my back was still painful. After a good night’s rest, I thought I felt much better, but attending all those meetings wore me out.
“Dinner’s here.” Nick announced with a knock on the door.
“OK.” I pulled myself out of the tub, took a quick shower, and came out in my pajamas.
Nick made me sit on the sofa with my back against the cushion and brought me a plate. He then made himself a plate and sat next to me.
“Do you need another massage?” I nodded. “Did you bring the plug-in compress?” I nodded again. Those compresses had become my best friends lately. We ate in a comfortable silence and I didn’t know how to approach the conversation we’d started back in my loft. “What do you want to do tomorrow?” He asked as casually as if we’d been married for years and were on vacation.
“Sleep?” I answered just as casually.
“After we sleep in, what would you like to do? I know!” His excitement level shot up, and he stopped talking.
“What’s exactly happening here?” I didn’t have to explain myself. Nick knew what I was talking about.
“Have you ended your relationship with Luke as I asked?”
“Kind of?”
“What the hell kind of answer is that, Bee Taylor?”
“Luke wasn’t in town when you told me to break up with him. I called him and told him about your plans of New York, London, and the wedding in Florence. He knows I’m here with you, and he sees what’s happening. We weren’t exactly in a relationship. We were dating, I suppose, and we liked each other, but nothing serious was going on.”
“Well, before I came to see you last week, Lily and I ended amicably. We, too, weren’t very serious, and she was cool about everything.”
“You two looked pretty serious to me.” I snipped.
Nick fought back. “Hey, I didn’t gallivant through Europe with her like you did with Luke.”
“That was a business trip,” I excused myself with that reasoning.
Nick laughed. “Let’s forget Lily and Luke and talk about us. Tell me all your concerns.”
I decided to swallow my pride and be completely honest. “I was with Beau for a very long time, and he was cheating on me for most of the years we were together. It took me a good many years before I started dating again, and the first person I came across was you.”
“I remember coming across you, too.” He grinned.
“Stupid me—I hopped into bed with a virtual stranger, and gave my heart away to a man who only wanted a good time with me. Every time you left my bed and didn’t call, it ate at me for months.”
“I’m sorry,” he whispered and held my hand.
“Obviously, we can’t help how we feel about one another or else we wouldn’t be here right now. But, I don’t know how anything has changed between us.”
“What’s changed is that I don’t want to be apart from you again. I told you the night you got hurt that I never felt good enough for you. I come from a traditional family where the men go to work and provide for the family, and the women stay home and raise the kids. I know times are different, but I still have this picture of me being the breadwinner for my family.”
“But you will one day provide for your family. You’re perfect the way you are. There’s not one thing wrong with you.”
“And I’ve come to understand that you’re perfect the way you are. I was very stuck in my ways with this ten-year timetable, but I realize now that everyone’s situation is different and if I bend a little, things could work.”
This conversation was bordering on a fairytale dreamland. Were we talking about marriage? “Um…what is it that you want for us?”
“I’ve said this from the beginning—I want us to date. This time, when we date, it’s with the knowledge that it will go somewhere. Maybe if we get to that point where we can’t live without one another, I can mooch off your earnings while I get myself ready to provide for our family?”
My mind was running in all directions. He wants us to date. He thinks we might get married. He is worried about providing a living for us and our family. What on earth?!
“So you want to try this again?”
“Bee Taylor.” His eyes bore into mine, and I couldn’t escape his gaze no matter how much I wanted to. “I love you.” And now…I was freaking out! This man went from not wanting me, to dating someone else, to loving me. This was just too much. “I see the doubt in your eyes, but I do love you.” His attempt at holding back a laugh didn’t work. “You don’t know how hard I tried not to love you. You were messing up my perfectly copacetic life. I was doing my own thing, living in peace when I met the woman who bothered the hell out of my peaceful mind. I always wanted to come back to you no matter the situation in life. You were always my first and last thought of each day.”
Now I wanted to laugh. I didn’t realize Nicholas Reid had a sentimental side to him. I guess the Reid genes were alive and kicking in this man, too.
“What to say...” were not the best words to express, but they popped out.
“Before you say anything, I’d like for you to understand a few things about me.”
“OK…”
“I want to do research, rather than patient care. I’ve applied to switch my med school program to an MD/PhD. I’ve done my two years of med school already, so now I have three to five years of PhD graduate training and two years of clinical rotations. At the earliest, I can be done in five years.”
I smiled for this brilliant man who was following his career dreams. “If that is where your heart is, I think it’s a fantastic decision.”
“The good news is, the school will cover my tuition and I get a generous stipend.”
“Why’s that?”
“All med schools with this program understand that we will
never make the kind of money our classmates who go into patient care will, but they need someone to teach the classes and do research. I tell you all this because I want you to understand that I will never make the kind of money my brother or uncle does. Surgeons are at the top of the food chain, pay-wise, and we researchers are the bottom feeders –that is until I discover something, patent it, and sell it to a pharmaceutical company,” he chuckled.
“I don’t need a lot of money. It matters not to me what you do as long as it’s something you love.” I had more to say but Nick led us into the bedroom, so he could take care of my back. “You’ve been out of my life, so you probably haven’t heard, but I came into some serious money on my thirtieth birthday.”