by Laura John
“Why did she buy you flowers?”
“When I got home after our date, there were rose petals leading towards the kitchen where this vase was along with a giant bottle of lube and a box of condoms.”
I want to laugh, but I also kind of feel sad about it. That night was supposed to be special, but I fucked it up.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper, hanging my head.
He steps forward and places his hand under my chin, lifting my face to meet his.
“Let’s not dwell on that. I want to move forward with you. I really do like you, Xavier, and I want a relationship with you.”
I smile and lean forward to place a soft kiss on his lips.
“I want that too. But I’m going to be honest with you, I don’t know how comfortable I am keeping us a secret. I really like your friends and family, and it just feels wrong to lie.”
“Come on, let me grab us beers, and we can sit and talk about this,” he says, tilting his head towards the living room.
He hands me a beer and sits next to me on the couch, our knees touching.
“I don’t want to lie anymore. I’ve done it way too much my whole life. I just wanted to make sure we are on the same page before we tell them we’re dating. I’ve done too many one-night stands trying to fuck myself straight and I want a real relationship. I want to get married one day and have kids. I don’t want to sleep with other people. And I want to call you my boyfriend. I understand you’re famous and eventually we’ll be seen together, and that scares the shit out of me. I’m not going to lie. But I understand that comes with being your boyfriend. So, if we are doing this, are you on the same page as me, or am I just another notch in your bedpost?”
I place my beer on the coffee table and grab his hand.
“I didn’t know what I wanted in the future before. Maybe kids, maybe a spouse. But I was happy just playing the field. Recently, I’ve been wanting more out of life. I want the exact same things as you. I want to be monogamous and I want to call you my boyfriend. I want a future with you. I can’t guarantee we’ll last forever, but I want to try something with you. I can’t let you slip away from me.”
He places his beer next to mine before straddling me and kissing me. I fucking love when he does that. I grab him by the hips and thrust my hardening dick up into his.
“Where’s your bedroom?” I ask and he grins, climbing off me and pulling me to his room.
This is going down tonight, and I am so excited to take his virginity.
“I need you,” I tell Xavier as soon as we get into my room. I grab his collar and smash my lips to his. I’ve never felt this insane desire washing through my body before.
He growls into my mouth, and my already hard dick pushes against my pants, wanting freedom.
“Are you sure?” he asks, pulling back slightly from the kiss and staring into my eyes. “I don’t want to pressure you into anything. We can go back downstairs and just watch a movie.”
I kiss him, shutting him up. “I’m sure. More than I’ve ever been about anything. I trust you, Xavier.”
With that confession, his lips are back on mine and his tongue darts into my mouth. He’s demanding and all alpha. I’ve always thought of myself as the alpha, but giving up control is exhilarating. I’d let this man do anything to me, and tonight I’m letting him be the first man to ever have me.
Xavier’s hands grab at my shirt and pulls it over my head.
“Damn, you must work out a lot to have abs like that,” he tells me, licking his lips. His chest rises and falls with each deep breath.
I smirk. “It helps get my mind off of things, so yeah, I spend a lot of time in the gym.”
Getting to his knees, he kisses and licks my abs while undoing my pants. He pulls them and my underwear down, and my dick springs forward, ready for anything the night brings.
Flashbacks to the wedding start playing through my brain. I know how good this is going to feel and I can’t wait. He has a look of awe in his eyes, and I feel like he wants to worship me. God, it’s so hot.
“I still can’t get over how giant this cock is,” he says while grabbing it and licking the tip.
My abs contract and I let out a hiss. Fuck, it feels so good.
“Like that?” he asks with a smirk. “I can’t wait to have you inside me one day, but tonight is about you. I’m going to take that ass and make you never question yourself again.”
He takes my dick fully into his mouth and I’m afraid I’m going to lose it too soon.
“That feels so fucking good,” I say between my teeth, my jaw clenching.
Even though my dick is still in his mouth, I can tell he’s smiling. His eyes are lit up like I’m the high he needed.
He lets my dick slip out of his mouth with a pop before commanding that I climb on the bed.
I’m so nervous but excited, and I do exactly what he says.
“Lay on your stomach. I can’t wait to taste that ass and get you ready. I’m not as big as you, but seeing that you’re a virgin, I’ll make sure you’re good and ready.”
A bit of a panic starts to set in but is swept away the moment his tongue touches my hole. It’s a bit of an odd sensation but feels so good. Of course, at this moment a flood of questions rush through my head. Am I clean enough? Does it taste nasty? Am I too hairy?
“Calm down. I want this to be the best night of your life, but you have to relax,” he tells me, feeling my emotions.
I take a few deep breaths and let myself be in the moment. His tongue continues to move, and fuck, it feels amazing. The more he licks and kisses me, the more I relax. His attention to detail is amazing.
Xavier gets off the bed, and I whimper, not wanting him to stop. “What are you doing? Why are you stopping?” I whine.
He chuckles a little. “Where did you put the lube and condoms?”
I point towards the bedside table. He grabs the bottle and pours a generous amount of lube onto his fingers. The coldness against my ass is a shock at first, and I tense slightly.
“Take a deep breath,” he coaches me.
I do as I’m told, and his cold, slippery finger enters me. I was expecting some pain, but instead, it feels so good. He twirls it, pulling and pushing it in and out, moving it around, exploring me. I continue to take deep breaths allowing myself to be only here. I don’t let my mind wander. I just let this amazing feeling wash over me.
He slips another finger inside me. It stings at first, the pressure is a new level, but quickly it turns to pleasure.
“Feels good, doesn’t it?” he asks, and I pant with a nod.
Xavier thrusts his fingers in and out, circling them and moving them. The sensation is so good. When he inserts his third finger, it feels almost like too much and I don’t know if I’m going to be able to handle his cock.
My own cock starts to soften at the thought and I’m about to tap out, this is all too much. He hits a spot that sends intense pleasure cascading through my body, and I yell, my dick becoming rock hard again. Oh my God, that feels amazing.
“What the fuck was that?” I ask, huffing out a breath, my heart racing.
Xavier chuckles. “That was me hitting your prostate. Feels good, doesn’t it?”
I nod, struggling to catch my breath. “Do it again,” I demand, wanting that sensation again.
He does a few more times and I start to come, the semen leaking down my leg.
“I’m not done with you yet, though,” he says, shedding his clothes and grabbing a condom.
I take this moment to watch his gloriously naked body. His tattoos cover his skin in a colorful display of artwork. I want to trace each one of them with my tongue. I always loved his ink, but seeing it up close and personal is like nothing I thought I would ever experience.
“Get on your knees,” he commands. “I’m going to try to be gentle, but I’ve just wanted you for so long that I might lose control. If at any time it hurts or it’s too much, tell me and I’ll stop. I want this to be the best night
of your life. So you have to be honest with me.”
His honesty makes my heart do a funny flip.
I get into position and he pours more lube onto me. The feeling of his cock presses at me and I take a deep breath as he pushes in.
“Fuck,” I hiss at the same time Xavier does.
“You feel so amazing. I can’t believe I’m so lucky to be with you. Just keep breathing. We’ll get through this.”
Again, my heart flips. I’m the lucky one, I want to say, but the words stay trapped in my head. Are Xavier and I dating now? Or are we still just friends? Friends with benefits? Shit, I’m getting stuck in my head again.
Once he’s fully inside of me, he pauses. “How are you doing?” he asks, his breathing already a little labored. “Are you ready for me to move?”
“Yes! Please. I need more,” I beg.
He starts to move, and the feeling is so intense. I’m getting hard again. It’s never been like this with a woman. I’ve never felt this feeling of being complete before.
“Don’t hold back,” I tell Xavier, looking over my shoulder. “I need you to show me it all. Give me your best.”
He grits his teeth, still trying to be gentle with me. Seeing him behind me like that, his jaw clenched, his tattoos and muscles on display, is almost too much to stand. He is so fucking sexy.
“Are you sure?” he asks, and I nod.
Grabbing my hip with one hand and leaning over me, he starts to pound into me. His other hand fists the sheet and the veins in his hand pulse. Something about that is so fucking hot.
We both grunt and moan as he gives me his all. His thrusts are deep and strong. I’ve never felt this feeling rushing over me before. I went all these years, never feeling connected to someone, never feeling this good. I know now that I will never go back to denying who I am. I love men, and this man with me right now is the one I want. He’s opened up this part of me I’ve kept hidden for way too damn long. I finally feel right in my own skin. I finally feel a sense of calm. The ugliness I felt is being washed away with every thrust.
He starts to pound me even harder and reaches a hand around to pump my cock. “I’m not going to last… You feel too good. I want you to come with me,” he moans into my ear.
He shifts his position slightly, going harder and hitting my prostate over and over again.
“Come,” he demands, in complete control of my body, and we both lose it.
Xavier’s body stiffens and I feel his cock pulsing inside me. My whole body is shaking, and I feel like I’m going to collapse. This is the strongest orgasm I’ve ever had. I almost feel like I’m going to pass out.
Pulling out of me gently, he kisses my cheek. I turn to look at him and he puts his fingers in his mouth, licking off the come.
“I love the taste of you,” he says with a wink. Holy shit. That is hot as fuck. “I’ll be right back,” he tells me and leaves to take care of the condom.
I lie on the bed, unable to move. The sound of water running in my bathroom almost sounds like it’s forever away. I am in another world, floating on a cloud of pure satisfaction.
“Let me take care of you,” Xavier whispers, returning with a washcloth. He gently cleans me up, and I’m so moved by his tenderness.
“Mind if I spend the night?” he asks after throwing the washcloth in the laundry basket. “I’ll have to leave early, but I don’t want to leave right now.” He wiggles his eyebrows suggestively.
“I’m too sore for another round,” I tell him, causing him to laugh.
“I know, but I want to cuddle. You are so fucking sexy, laying here, looking thoroughly fucked. Drunk on my cock. I don’t want to let you go.”
I smile, and warmth rushes to my cheeks. No one has ever spoken to me like that before.
He pulls back the blankets and we both climb in. He pulls me into his arms, his warm chest pressed against my back. This feels perfect. With every rise and fall of his chest, my heart opens more and more.
Can I actually have this? Can I have my happily ever after, or is doom waiting around the corner? Pushing the thoughts aside, I let myself be in the moment. After a few minutes, I drift off to sleep in the arms of a man who I’m developing feelings for.
“It’s early,” Xavier whines, and I kiss his nose.
“I know, but I have a regular job. I really should have gotten more sleep last night, but I’m happy you spent the night. I made a pot of coffee. Help yourself and show yourself out.”
I go to give him a kiss goodbye, but of course he has to grab the back of my neck and stick his tongue in my mouth. I moan and my dick is growing hard.
“If I didn’t have an early meeting, I would definitely climb back into bed with you. It sucks so bad to have to leave.”
He pouts but nods. He looks so fucking hot in my bed. I’ve had dirty dreams of a moment like this, but never thought it would be reality.
“I’m going back to sleep for a bit,” he says before letting out a big yawn, and now I want to shove my cock down his throat. Fuck, it’s going to be a long day.
“I’ll set the alarm and lock up when I leave,” he tells me with a sleepy smile.
“Thank you. Do you want to get together again tonight?” I ask, hoping the answer is yes.
He laughs and nods. “Yeah. My place or yours?”
“How about here? Meadow can cook for us. I really want you to meet her.”
His eyes light up, “I’d love that. You don’t mind another late night?”
I shrug. “I think I’m just going to have to get used to it, since my boyfriend is an MLB player. I’ll just remember to schedule later meetings.”
He laughs and pulls the blankets back up, and I walk out to what is probably going to be a long day at the office.
“Get out of my way or I’ll burn it!” Meadow screams and I laugh at her.
“I’m literally just standing here,” I tell her, leaning against the cupboard and taking a sip of my beer.
“That’s the fucking problem!” She pushes my shoulder, trying to make me budge. “At least sit at the island and get out my damn way.”
“You’re cute when you’re angry.”
“You’re annoying, always. Sit down and shut up.”
I laugh but do as directed.
“What are you making us anyway?” I ask, playing with my beer bottle.
“A surprise,” she says, fanning her hands and doing jazz fingers.
“You’re weird.”
“And you’re a pain in my ass! Now shut up,” she says, turning her attention back to the stove where she has every one of my pots out.
“Are you cleaning up afterward?” I ask, looking around at the mess.
“I know I have to learn to be cleaner. But I’m just nervous. I’m trying something new and I want it to be perfect for your boyfriend.” She turns and waggles her eyebrows at the last word, and I roll my eyes.
“You’re loving this more than I am,” I say before sipping my beer.
My phone buzzes and I smile at the picture of Xavier.
“He’s on his way, so hurry the fuck up.”
“Ahh!” she screams and throws her hands up. “How am I supposed to make perfection under this kind of stress?”
“Maybe we shouldn’t open you a restaurant,” I joke, earning myself a glare.
“I’ll be fine. I’m just stressing out today.” She wipes the back of her hand across her forehead.
“Why?” I ask, suddenly realizing she is a bit higher strung than normal.
“Well, while you’ve been hooking up with Baseball Boy, I’ve kind of been seeing someone as well, but I found out this morning that he’s married.”
“Meadow!” I yell. “Why did you not tell me about him?”
“Because you were busy coming out to everyone, and I didn’t want you to worry. You always worry when I start seeing someone. I actually kind of liked this one, too. But his wife called me this morning when she found my number on his phone, and yeah, the rest is history.”
/> I stare at her, completely dumbstruck. How could I have been so caught up in my own life and missed this completely? I’m such a shit friend.
“I’m sorry I didn’t say anything sooner, but it wasn’t meant to be.” She starts to plate some amazing smelling food. Her lips are pressed together tightly, her cheeks are flushed, and her eyes are glassy.
Shit, fuck, I hate seeing my best friend like this.
“How come I fall for unavailable men?” she whispers, looking devastated, and a tear falls down her face.
I get up and rush to her side, pulling her into my arms.
“I’m so sorry, hon,” I whisper into her hair, petting her head.
I can’t help but feel like part of her insecurities are from our relationship. I hate that I did that to her. She fell in love with me, and I wasn’t able to love her like that. Thankfully, we made it through it and became best friends, but I know a part of her doubts herself because of me.
She pushes me back when the doorbell rings and wipes her face.
“Go let your loverboy in,” she says, after taking a deep breath.
“This conversation isn’t over,” I tell her as I walk to get the door.
“I hope you’re hungry,” I tell Xavier when I open the door. Fuck, does he look good.
He’s wearing a leather jacket and form-fitting jeans. I know his ass is going to look fantastic in those. I let him walk in front of me so I can admire it.
He kisses me on the lips and starts walking to the kitchen. Yep, I was right. His ass looks damn fine.
“Xavier, this is my best friend, Meadow,” I say when we enter the kitchen.
He waves at her and she rushes over to wrap him in her signature tight hug. My heart swells a little seeing my favorite person accepting my new boyfriend so openly. I take a deep breath, trying to push down all the overwhelming feelings that are rushing to the surface.
“I’m sorry, I’m a hugger,” she says, stepping back.
“I’m totally okay with that,” Xavier replies with a giant smile.
“Meadow was just telling me about how the guy she has been seeing is actually married,” I tell Xavier. His eyes go super wide, and Meadow glares at me.