She pulled her face up to look at me. Her jade gaze locked with mine. “He’s lucky he has you. You’re so good to Lennon, and I can see how much he loves you when I watch the two of you together. Has your mom tried to overcome her struggles?”
“I don’t think she wants to make a change at this point in her life. She’s pretty checked out. But when it’s just her and I, she’s herself. For brief windows, at least. But when she’s in crowds with my dad, all the social pressures get to her, I guess, and she checks out. I think it’s gotten worse this last year. I’ve removed myself, and I don’t see them as often. The last time I saw her, she slept half the weekend away. I found a bottle of painkillers in her bathroom. I shouldn’t be pouring this on you. My family is fucked up. The worst part is, no one says anything. I swear I’m the only one that calls them out on their bullshit.”
“Do you have any idea how brave you are?” She looked at me like I just brought her the sun and set it in her hands.
I laughed. “Far from brave, Jade.”
“You’re so hard on yourself. Maybe because you didn’t grow up in a house like I did, with someone telling you how smart and talented you are every day. But let me tell you, if someone I love overdosed right in front of me, I wouldn’t bounce back so easily. You just handle whatever life throws at you. And life has thrown you more than most could handle. You’re in a band because you know how much it means to your brother. And I know you enjoy it, but not the way the others do. Yet, you make it a priority because that’s what you do, Cruz Winslow. You take care of everyone around you, and you don’t ask for anything in return.”
I stared at her. A lump formed in my throat, making it difficult to breathe. Overcome with everything I felt for this girl.
I held her face in my hands. “I love you.”
She sucked in a breath and a single tear ran down her face. “I love you, too.”
Her arms came around my neck and I hugged her tight. Damn. I’d never told a chick I loved her before, but I did. I loved her so much it was painful.
She pulled back and emotion welled in her gorgeous jade stare. “I’ve loved you for a while.”
I tucked the loose hair that broke free from her elastic behind her ear. “Yeah? Me too. I’ve never said it to anyone before.”
“Neither have I. I mean, not counting my dad,” she said and smiled.
“Lots of firsts happening here, More Jade.”
“Yep. I like it. Because they’re all with you.”
“Me too. What would you like to do today? And what time do you want to go home? I need to send Ponch a text,” I said.
“I think we should go to the Met for sure.”
“Ah, you’re into art now?” I teased.
“I know it’s your passion, so I’d love to go with you.”
“Where the hell did you come from?” I said, grazing her lips with mine.
“Bucktown,” she whispered.
I chuckled against her perfect mouth. She kissed me hard before pulling back. “Okay, lover boy. Let’s go, or we’ll never get out of here.”
Museums were my thing. Thankfully, my mother was a lover of art, so it was something we shared. She would take me to museums on our travels, and I developed a love for art, the culture, the creativity. All of it.
“I’ve never seen anything like this,” Jade said as we entered the Metropolitan Museum of Art.
“Yeah, the art and artifacts here span more than six thousand years of history. It’s pretty amazing.”
“It is.”
“This is my favorite area,” I said, leading her into a new section of the museum.
“Oh, wow. I like this.”
“It’s Egyptian mummies and ancient Egypt artifacts. Some of this stuff dates back to the Ptolemaic period. It’s fascinating.”
Jade and I spent a few hours at the Met before we grabbed lunch. She wanted to see Grand Central Station on our way to the hangar. To say that it had been an amazing weekend was an understatement. I didn’t want it to end.
“Hey Ponch, thanks for being so flexible with us,” I said.
“Not a problem. Did you enjoy New York, little lady?”
“I love it here. Thank you so much for extending things today. We went to the Met and to Grand Central. I helped land a plane yesterday. I get to check so many things off my bucket list,” Jade said with a big grin.
Ponch laughed. “I’ll save you a seat again today, if you want to help me land again.”
I led her outside to the plane, and I was pleased to see that Veronica was not our flight attendant. Mary had worked for my dad since I was born.
“Cruzie, how are you?” She was full of personality, and always this happy.
“I’m good. Great to see you. This is my girlfriend, Jade.”
“Aren’t you cute as a button, Jade. I’m Mary, nice to meet you.”
“It’s nice to meet you as well,” Jade said, shaking the older woman’s hand.
We took our seats and Jade leaned in close to me. “Please tell me you didn’t sleep with her, too. I really don’t want to hate Mary.”
I laughed. “No. No one else that works for my dad. I promise.”
“Thank God. I wish we didn’t have to leave. This was so fun. How am I going to go back to dealing with Meagan now?” she said.
“Does she know you’re moving out in December? You can stay with me every night if you want.” I wriggled my eyebrows.
“Yeah. She knows. She’s moving into a single, which is a good idea because she’s not easy to live with. I’m so happy I’ll get to room with Ari. And I’m not staying at your place every night. I need to have a place of my own. You can stay with me sometimes too.”
“Why would we stay in a twin bed with Satan’s daughter sleeping beside us, when I have a king bed and my own room?”
She studied me. “You make a good argument. But I need to sleep in my room sometimes. I can stay with you on the weekends.”
“Why? For what purpose? Did you like sleeping together last night?”
Her cheeks pinked and she glanced around to make sure Ponch and Mary weren’t listening, like we were discussing something sinister.
“Of course, I did. But what happened to taking things slow?” Her gaze searched mine.
“Fuck going slow. We already did that. It’s been almost three months since I met you. I’m ready to turn things up.”
“I’ll bet you are.” She laughed and buckled her seatbelt for take-off.
“Get your mind out of the gutter. We don’t have to decide anything today.”
Once we were in the air, Jade pulled out her books and worked for the next hour until Ponch called her up front. She squeezed in every minute she could. She wasn’t like anyone I’d ever met. She was genuine and real. Hardworking and determined. And I loved everything about her.
Chapter Fifteen
Jade
I hugged Ari goodbye and made my way to the back room to meet Cruz after his show. It was the first time I’d been out in a while, but with Thanksgiving being a few days away, I didn’t have any tests this week. I loved watching him perform and I promised I would come to The Dive tonight. He was difficult to say no to, which was why I’d slept at his house every single night since we’d returned from New York over a week ago. I couldn’t argue with him, I slept better with him next to me. He hadn’t tried to take anything further physically, it was me who’d grown impatient. He stopped things from going further when we got too heated. He said he wanted me to be sure I was ready.
I wasn’t one of those girls who had this long list of rules regarding my virginity. I didn’t. I just wanted to be in love. And I was now—so what was the problem? I’d never experienced an attraction like I had with Cruz. Nothing compared to this. So, there was no reason to hold back, except my boyfriend was afraid of taking my virtue too soon. He was an
enigma. He could be crude and vulgar, but he had this old-fashioned gentleman side to him that no one else saw.
“Hey.” Cruz met me in the hallway, and I sensed his discomfort. His shoulders were stiff, and his honeyed gaze distant.
“Great show,” I said, studying his movements.
“Yeah, thanks. Uh, apparently my father is here. I haven’t seen him yet, but Luke said he’s in the back. Do you want to meet him?”
“Of course. Yes. I would like that.”
He grasped my hand with a firmer grip than usual and led me to the back room where Lennon was huddled in the corner intently listening to who I assumed was their father. He looked to be about my dad’s age, mid-forties, and tall like Cruz. The similarities ended there, as he favored Lennon’s coloring with dark hair and blue eyes. He was an attractive man and dressed to the nines in a black suit. Their conversation came to an abrupt end when they both looked up.
“Hey, Jade. Thanks for coming tonight,” Lennon said.
I liked Cruz’s younger brother, but I worried for him. He’d been very down the last few days because they hadn’t heard anything from AF Records and things were moving slow. He had all his eggs in one basket. I guessed it to be the reason their father was here. I was torn on how I felt about Exiled getting signed. I didn’t want Cruz to leave. I knew that he wanted to finish school, and selfishly, I wanted him to stay with me. But I knew how important Lennon’s happiness was to him, so I struggled with how selfish I was when it came to Cruz.
“Of course. You guys were amazing.”
“So, this is the infamous Jade?” Cruz’s father walked toward me with a bright smile and an extended hand.
“Mr. Winslow, it’s nice to meet you.”
“Don’t age me, sweetheart. Call me Steven, please. You’re sure easy on the eyes. Cruz has always had an affinity for beautiful things.” His voice was husky and worn.
“She’s a human being, not a thing.” Cruz was on the defense. His shoulders were stiff, chin up, and there was an edge in his tone. He didn’t like his father, and he didn’t hide his disdain.
Steven’s laughter vibrated off the walls. “Eh, big college boy is getting technical. Sorry about that. I meant no offense.”
Nothing about Steven Winslow felt genuine.
“None taken,” I said, glancing up at Cruz.
“So Jade, tell me, when Exiled signs with a label, will you be going on tour with them?” Steven looked down at his phone while he dropped a bomb on the room. Cruz and I hadn’t talked about what we’d do. We preferred to pretend it wasn’t happening.
Everyone stared at me and the room grew silent. Cruz squeezed my hand before jumping in. “We haven’t even signed with anyone. Don’t get so ahead of yourself. Jade’s studying to be a doctor, she’s not going on tour with the band.”
Steven slipped his phone in his suit pocket. “She’s young. People change paths all the time. Why don’t you let her decide for herself?”
“Is there a reason you’ve graced us with your presence?” Cruz’s tone was harsh and cold.
“Yes, I got a call from AF Records. After the holidays, they’d like to come see you perform. We need some new material. Labels are looking for bands that think outside the box. Expand a bit, boys. Write some new shit these next few months and dig deep.”
Luke watched Cruz before jumping in. “What he means is that we don’t have to stick to only alternative rock. I know you guys like to bring in some R & B, and some slower ballads—don’t be afraid to have some fun. Mix it up.”
“I like it,” Dex said.
Cruz lets a sarcastic laugh escape. “Sure, you do.”
“What the hell does that mean?” Dex asked.
“It means you’re an ass kisser. You’d sell your soul to the Devil if you thought my dad wanted you to,” Cruz said.
Dex lunged at Cruz and my hand slipped from his. I grabbed Cruz’s shirt and pushed between them. No way was Dex touching Cruz in front of me. I was aware I wasn’t much of a match for him. But he’d still have to go through me either way.
“Don’t touch him,” I said, pointing my finger in Dex’s face, surprising everyone in the room including myself.
Lennon, Luke, and Cruz laughed first. Adam and Dex followed. But Steven just watched me with an amused smile on his face.
“Thanks, baby.” Cruz kissed my forehead.
“Let’s all relax. Take the edge off.” Steven pulled a joint from his pocket and lit it. He offered it to me.
“No thanks,” I said, wondering why the hell a forty-something-year-old man was pushing everyone to party.
“We’re out. Lennon, are you coming?” Cruz said, and my gaze pleaded with his younger brother to come with us.
“Yeah. I’ve got a test tomorrow, Dad. Cruz and I will meet you after for breakfast though, okay?”
“Those tests won’t mean much in a few months, but suit yourself,” Steven said with a cocky smirk.
Dex stepped up and took the joint to his lips, exhaling all the smoke in my face as we walked past. Cruz shoved him back before we made our way outside.
“He’s such an asshole,” Cruz said as Lennon and I both slipped into the car.
“Who? Dad or Dex?”
“Both.”
I glanced over at my boyfriend. He was visibly angry. He hit the steering wheel with the butt of his palms. I reached over and put a hand on his back.
“Don’t let him get to you,” I said.
“He’s offering you a joint and who the hell knows what else he’ll offer you, Lennon. You need to be on guard where Dad is concerned. I know you want to sign with the label. But that doesn’t mean you have to sell your soul to the Devil. You’ve worked hard to get where you are. Don’t let him derail you.”
“You worry too much. I’m fine. I’m sorry if he made you uncomfortable, Jade,” Lennon said.
“Not at all.”
“That was badass, you jumping in to fight Dex, though,” Cruz said and we all burst out in laughter.
“I don’t know where that even came from,” I said.
Cruz turned and his gaze locked with mine. “You’re a little scrapper, baby.”
“When I need to be.”
“You do know I can take Dex easily, right? The dude can’t fight for shit,” Cruz said.
“You guys shouldn’t be fighting anyway. Don’t play into your dad’s hands.”
“She’s right,” Lennon said from the back seat.
“Well, I’ll feel better when his ass is on a plane tomorrow afternoon.”
“I still can’t believe Mom wants to go to Japan for Thanksgiving. I don’t know what she’s thinking,” Lennon said.
“I talked to her today. It’s too far to travel for a long weekend. I told her we’ll meet them in Park City for Christmas.” Cruz pulled in the driveway.
“Yeah, Christmas will be better. We’ll have more time off. And I’m glad we’re coming to your house, Jade,” Lennon said.
“Me too. Prepare yourself for a lot of fun.”
We walked into the house. Lennon stopped and hugged me. “Thanks for coming tonight, Jade.”
“No problem. See you tomorrow,” I said.
Cruz took my hand and led me to his room. He shut the door and pulled me into the bathroom, before dropping to sit on the closed toilet seat and reaching for me. His arms wrapped around my waist and his cheek rested against my stomach. I stroked his hair, and we just held each other in silence for a few minutes.
“Take a shower with me?” He looked up to meet my stare.
“What?”
“You heard me. Come on. It’ll be fun,” he said.
“I’ve never done that.” My voice was just above a whisper.
“Neither have I. I’ve never wanted to. Usually the shower is an escape to get away from people. But I want to shower with yo
u. Come on. I’ll wash your hair. And your body,” he said with a quirked brow.
“Okay.” I was nervous, but I wanted to do it. I wanted to be close to him. In every possible way.
He lifted my shirt over my head and unclasped my bra. I crossed my arms over my chest because I felt so exposed. He tugged my arms back down to my sides. Yes, he’d seen me undressed before. But I hadn’t been standing in the light.
“Don’t hide yourself from me,” he said.
I tugged his shirt over his head and took in his chiseled chest and defined abdomen. He was beautiful. It still shocked me that I was dating him sometimes. He pulled me close and unbuttoned my jeans, pushing them down my legs. I closed my eyes because that’s the only thing I could think to do. He chuckled.
“Look at me, baby,” he said.
I opened one eye to see him pull his jeans off before leaning over to turn on the shower. The bathroom fogged up within a few seconds, and he took my hand and led me in. Hot water ran down my back and it felt so good. Cruz poured shampoo into the palms of his hands and massaged it into my hair. Heaven. I lathered up the soap and washed his chest, taking my time on his chiseled abs. Feeling each hard ridge beneath my touch. I traced the script on his chest with my finger. Damn. Showering alone would never do after this.
He kissed me and moved his lips down my neck. My back was against the wall and he dropped to his knees and kissed me in places I’d never been kissed. My head fell back, and I tried to keep from screaming. My hands tangled in his hair and he looked up to meet my gaze, I swear I’ve never loved anyone the way I loved him. And I never would. I closed my eyes and enjoyed his touch as he buried his face between my legs. He made me feel things I never knew existed. I cried out my release, and he stood up and kissed me.
“See, showering together is so much better than showering alone,” he said.
My legs were jelly and my head dizzy. He laughed before turning off the water and stepping out of the shower. He wrapped me in a towel, and I was still dazed when I slipped on his T-shirt and climbed into bed.
He pulled me close and pushed my damp hair away from my face. His chin rested against my forehead.
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