by Gail Koger
“I never got a proper honeymoon, either,” Xenia sighed.
“That’s the problem with Coletti warriors, not a romantic bone in their bodies.”
“They think they can throw some chocolate at us and everything’s good,” Xenia sniped.
I look around the room. “Ain’t no chocolate here.”
“Bastards.”
Granny Annabel materialized in full Gypsy gear. “Your man is stupido.”
“Yes, he is.”
“I will free you.” Granny walked through the door.
Xenia stared at me hopefully. “Can she?”
“Oh yeah. They’re about to learn you never mess with Granny.”
An explosion rocked the building.
Sirens began wailing.
The lights flickered and died.
I walked over to the security keypad and held my bracelet against it. Click. The door slid open. I peeked out. Two frost-covered guards were sprawled on the floor.
Xenia gaped at them. “Are they dead?”
“No, Granny put them in a deep sleep.”
We exited the building. The Coletti electro-fence and automated laser canons were coated in a thick layer of ice. Frost-covered soldiers littered the ground. “I tried to tell Ethan Granny Annabel was more than enough protection, but he wouldn’t listen.”
“He’ll listen now.”
“Oh yeah. I’m kinda surprised Zarek hasn’t shown up.”
“His warbird is part of the fleet intercepting the marauders,” Xenia replied.
I did a happy dance. “There’s no one to stop us from finding the treasure.”
“Not a soul.” Xenia broke into a funky chicken dance. “We are women, hear us roar.”
“No one’s gonna keep us down,” I sang.
“We are strong.”
I hopped over a soldier. “We are invincible.”
“We are women,” we shouted in unison and walked out the front gate.
People gawked at us.
My singing wasn’t that bad, was it? “Ah, maybe we need to hit the mall first, we kinda stand out in our battle armor,” I said.
A wicked smile curled Xenia’s mouth. “Quinn got me a credit card.”
I chortled. “So did Ethan.” I assumed the illusion of a Vegas party girl. “Let’s party.”
Xenia suddenly sported black hair and a silver micro mini dress. She hailed us a cab.
Chapter Fourteen
Even after ten years of war, Vegas was still a glittering mecca with architectural wonders, miles of colorful neon lights and one-of-a-kind exhibits. The sidewalks were crowded with humans and aliens of every shape and form. They were all here to take in the sights and gamble away their money.
As we cruised the main strip, the night air was full of music, laughter and gimmicky calls from twenty-foot tall vid screens luring the unwary inside the casinos with promises of instant wealth.
Granny popped into the cab. “A very angry Coletti Warlord showed up at the base.”
“What does he look like?” Xenia wanted to know.
The image of a big, distinguished looking man with thick gray hair and the eyes of a roused predator appeared in mid-air.
“Oh Goddess, that’s Uncle Saul,” Xenia exclaimed.
I swallowed hard. “He looks really pissed.”
“Granny Annabel did make a mess out of Uncle Saul’s new base and she also incapacitated his men,” Xenia pointed out.
“Once it thaws out, everything should work like it did before. Hopefully.”
“I taught the Coletti a much-needed lesson,” Granny huffed.
“Yeah, boy, you sure did.” I turned to Xenia. “How good of a tracker is General Jones?”
“One of the best,” Xenia answered.
Granny proclaimed, “Do not worry, Kizzy. I will put him to sleep too.”
“No!” I cried.
Xenia quickly added, “Uncle Saul is needed to keep our planetary defenses operational.”
Granny eyed Xenia suspiciously.
“She’s telling the truth Granny.”
“If you say so.”
Ethan was abruptly in my head. “What have you done?”
“Me? Nothing?”
“Uncle Saul said the entire base is covered in three feet of ice!” Ethan bellowed.
“It’ll melt.”
“When?”
I shrugged. “A day or two. None of this would have happened if you hadn’t locked us up.”
“You broke out of jail and put the security of the entire planet at risk,” Ethan snapped.
“Aren’t you exaggerating just a bit? Granny didn’t touch Nellis Air Force Base.”
“Two hundred of the General’s soldiers were turned into popsicles. That’s a massive loss of life,” Ethan stated ominously.
“They’re not dead. It’s more like they’re bears and hibernating.”
“Bears? Wake them up. Now!”
I rubbed my aching head. “Ok. Ok. No need to yell.” I switched my attention to my grandmother. “Granny can you go back to the base and unfreeze all the soldiers?”
“No.”
The taxi driver kept shooting nervous glances at Granny.
“No?” Ethan’s voice was a purr of menace.
“You treated my granddaughter like a common thief. You no good for her.”
Ethan let out an ill-tempered growl. “I’m trying to keep Kizzy safe.”
“You do poor job and you break her heart. Stay away from her.”
“Granny’s right. I want a partner not a keeper. So, maybe it’s best if we part ways,” I stated, wiping at the tears suddenly pouring down my face.
I felt Ethan’s shock. “You want to leave me?”
“My clan has treated me badly for years. I won’t let you do the same.” A girl had to have some self-respect.
“I’m sorry Angel. Fear drove my decision to lock you up. You’re an amazing woman who I’m proud to call my mate. Can you ever forgive me?”
My jaw dropped. He was admitting to being wrong. “I don’t know. Are you going to send more storm troopers after us?”
“No. The three of you are quite capable of defeating any Bjarke warrior.”
Hmmm. What had caused this about face? Was it a trick? Coletti warriors were sneaky bastards. “You don’t have any problem with Xenia and me recovering the stucco warriors.”
“Not at all. All I ask is you’re careful,” Ethan said calmly.
Whoa! Something was up. “You too, sugar.”
“Can I tell Uncle Saul Granny Annabel will release his men from hibernation?”
I threw a pleading look at Granny. “Please.”
She nodded and vanished.
“Consider it done.”
“Thank you, my love.” Ethan pressed a ghostly kiss on my mouth and was gone. I sagged back against the seat.
Xenia let out a shaky breath. “Quinn apologized and babbled on about how much he loves me.”
“Ethan did too. They’re planning something.”
“I’m afraid so. Coletti warlords are never this agreeable.”
I tapped on the glass partition. “Let us out here.”
The driver quickly pulled over in front of a military surplus store.
I swiped my bracelet over his card reader and climbed out. “Let’s get our supplies and retrieve the stucco warriors, before the shit hits the fan.”
We hurried inside the surplus store. Xenia stopped in front of a vintage poker slot machine and stared at it in utter fascination. “How do you play it?”
“You have to feed it some credits and pull that metal bar,” I said.
Xenia swiped her bracelet over the scanner and pulled the lever. The machine went crazy. Cha-ching-ching-a-ling! Cha-ching-ching-a-ling! Lights flashed wildly and old American coins poured out.
“Holy shit! You won the jackpot!”
Xenia hopped up and down in excitement. “I’ve never won anything before!”
An older woman hurried over to us. “Con
gratulations! You just won twenty-five thousand dollars in old currency.”
My eyebrows shot up. “But you can’t spend old currency.”
“I can’t?” Xenia’s voice was full of disappointment.
“Nope.”
The woman shrugged. “Would you settle for ten thousand credits in merchandise?”
“I would,” Xenia said.
An hour later, we were outfitted with camouflage uniforms, laser pistols, enough explosives to start a war and a 2005 Hummer.
“Do you know how to drive a stick shift?”
Xenia shook her head. “Since I can teleport, there was no reason for me to learn how to drive.”
“Watch and learn.” I climbed in the driver’s seat and fired the Hummer up. The engine rumbled loudly.
“I’ve never owned a car before,” Xenia said, stroking the seats.
“The Hummer was really popular back before the war.” I pulled out on the busy street.
A moron in a battered, red sedan gunned it and did a kamikaze cut across three lanes of traffic.
Laying on the horn, I missed his bumper by a good inch. Las Vegas traffic sucked.
“Is he crazy?”
“More than likely, he’s drunk. Just think how furious our guys would be if we got hurt in a car accident.”
“They would hunt the male down and kill him,” Xenia stated.
“Yep.”
It took us an hour to get to the Best Whore House and another ten minutes to find a place to park.
In the dim light the garishly lit whore house stood out brightly, exposing every inch of its peeling paint and decaying exterior. The cracked sidewalk was covered with rotting garbage, beer bottles and urine. The stench made my eyes water. Only the truly desperate or soused would willingly enter that place.
Was I that desperate? My lips twisted in self-mockery. Oh yeah. If I chickened out now, I would never find the treasure and Ethan would never respect me.
Xenia grimaced. “This place reminds me of pleasure houses on Vega Five.”
“Who knew skid row was universal.” I jumped about a foot when a rat the size of a small dog ran across my boot. For some odd reason the area gave me the willies and having a couple of armed-to-the-teeth warlords at our side suddenly seemed like a really good idea.
Boisterous shouts, rock music and wild, unrestrained laughter spilled out into the street from a graffiti covered bar. A hollowed-eye drunk loitered in the open doorway and eyed us hungrily.
It was time to suck it up and grow a pair. Yanking out my brand-new stun gun, I held it up and triggered it.
The drunk stared at the arcing electrical current for a moment and then ambled off down the sidewalk.
“A smart, tactical move,” Xenia commented as we watched him disappear into the darkness.
“A taser is a great way to get a man’s attention.”
Granny materialized next to me. “Dios Mio. Evil resides here.”
That explained the itchy feeling in my skull. “Another wannabe God?”
“The creature’s power is not of this world,” Granny replied.
Xenia’s right hand dropped to the butt of her laser pistol. “You think it’s one of the Tomb Raiders?”
“To discover what it is I must connect to the esoteric plane.”
“Wait!” I held up my hand. “Before you go, I need to know if you were you able to unfreeze the soldiers?”
“Of course, I am Dragos.” Granny vanished.
“Whew! Maybe General Jones will ignore us for a while.”
“Not a chance.” Xenia scanned the area. “I bet one of my mother’s rival relic hunters is after the treasure too. Some of them are powerful psychics with ties to Bjarke mercenaries.”
“Oh, yay.”
Two scantily clad women staggered out of The Best Whore House. One had bleached blonde hair with two inches of black roots showing and a dragon tattoo crawling up the right side of her face.
Xenia made a face. “There’s not enough liquor in the universe to make me want to touch that.”
“You’re not a horny guy. Their standards are a lot lower.” I focused my attention on the second woman and did a double take.
Her hair was a brilliant shade of pink and kinda reminded me of the cotton candy you got at the fair. She resembled a grotesquely made up Kewpie-doll. Two long pieces of toilet paper were stuck to her stilettos and fluttered behind her like well trained dogs as she strutted down the sidewalk.
Xenia snickered.
The women paused at the corner and flashed their not so perky double E boobs at the passing motorists.
“I guess that’s one way to attract a john’s or a cop’s attention,” I scoffed. Gangster’s Paradise suddenly blared from my bracelet. I sucked in a relieved breath. It was Uncle Aldo’s ringtone. I tapped my bracelet. “Uncle Aldo?”
“Why was I not invited to your wedding, Kizzy?”
“Are you somewhere safe Uncle Aldo? Not only is the Overlord searching for you, Luigi has sic’d his death squads on you too.”
“You did not answer my question.”
Xenia murmured, “Busted.”
“Because I didn’t have a wedding. When and if I do, I will invite you.”
There was a note of disappointment in Uncle Aldo’s voice. “Yet you are sharing a bed with this Coletti.”
I winced. How did he know that? “Ethan’s nothing like Ivan.”
“Do you wear the Coletti warrior’s mark?”
I fingered my ownership band. “Yes.”
“Then you will have a proper church wedding,” Uncle Aldo stated emphatically.
“Ah, that might not be possible. Coletti customs aren’t quite like ours.”
“You will be espoused by our priest.”
I rolled my eyes. “Father Jack died.”
“Father Benedict replaced him.”
“But Father Benedict’s always intoxicated, and he set the alter on fire during communion,” I protested.
“You will be married at San Lorenzo!”
“Ok. Ok.”
A laugh escaped Xenia.
“Do you love him?”
“I do.” Damned if I knew why. Ethan was an overbearing, bossy prick who kissed like an angel. He had made me part of his family and he always showed up when I really needed him. Plus, he had all those luscious muscles, clever, clever fingers and sexy dance moves. Hoo boy, I was getting hot just thinking about them.
“Does he love you?”
A good question. He said he did, but I wasn’t sure, so I hedged, “He cares for me.”
“It is good you are mated now. You need a strong man to control your impulsive behavior.”
“I’m not impulsive. I plan out my jobs meticulously. Why does everyone treat me like a fluff-brained idiot? I can take care of myself.”
“Kizzy your stunts are legendary,” Uncle Aldo scolded.
“I was a kid then. I’m a responsible adult now and I don’t do crazy anymore.”
Uncle Aldo let out a long sigh.
Xenia chortled. “Forget it. He sounds like my dad. Nothing you say will make him change his mind.”
She had a point.
A fat businessman pulled up in spiffy, black Cadillac, “Hey sweet cheeks, how much do you charge for a blow job?”
“Is he talking to me?”
“He is.” Xenia pulled her taser. “He needs to be taught some manners.”
“Nah, I can get rid of dumbass.” I yelled at him, “My rate is ten thousand credits.”
The two hookers gave me the evil eye.
“Where are you, Kizzy?”
“I’m in Vegas.”
“For that price you’d better be able to suck chrome off a bumper,” the businessman shouted, waving a wad of credit sticks out the window.
Holy hell, he thought I was serious. “Sorry buddy, I’ve already got a date.”
The hookers stampeded over to him. “Hey lover, you can get the two of us for only fifty dollars.”
The fa
t idiot snarled, “I don’t want no diseased, skanky whore touching my willie.”
With a snarl, Kewpie-doll launched herself through the open window. “I’m gonna give you a blow job you’ll never forget.”
“Let go of my willie,” the businessman shrieked and hit the gas.
I watched in amazement as the Cadillac careened wildly down the street with Kewpie-doll’s feet hanging out the window and the toilet paper flapping in the wind like two flags.
Her partner tottered after her yelling, “Stella! Stelllla!”
Xenia laughed. “That’s something you don’t see every day.”
“All we need now is a streetcar named Desire,” I retorted.
His voice full of concern, Uncle Aldo asked, “Kizzy? Are you there?”
The Cadillac barely made it a block before it slammed into a fire hydrant. A geyser of water shot twenty feet into the air.
Crap! It wouldn’t be long before the police showed up.
“Kizzy?”
“Everything’s great and gotta go.” I quickly disconnected and took a firm grip on my stun gun. “Let get this done before the cops show up.”
Xenia threw a cautious glance around and nodded.
Avoiding broken bottles, piles of trash and burnt out vehicles, we headed down the alley.
Xenia checked her scanner. “No security or cameras.”
“I’m not surprised.” I tried the knob on the back door and to my surprise it opened.
Xenia pulled her laser pistol as we stepped inside.
A colony of roaches scurried away.
“Ugh!” My nose wrinkled in disgust. The place stunk of sex, sweat, stale booze and despair. Moans and groans sounded from the rooms.
A look of revulsion on her face, Xenia groused, “Why in the Goddess’s name hasn’t Central Command or the health department shut this place down?”
“Too busy chasing after the Rodan, Earth First and the Dragos clan,” I answered.
“I’ll talk to Uncle Saul. He’ll get it taken care of.”
“Think he could force Ivan to clean this mess up?”
Xenia flashed me a wicked grin. “If he still lives, this is the perfect punishment.”
We crept silently down the hallway, avoiding the used condoms and beer cans. I paused at the door marked office and held my bracelet against it. Click. I opened the door and stepped inside.