“You can do that?”
“If it's an old safe, sure.”
“Wow. I'm impressed. You're gonna go far.”
“All the way to the top, man.” Dan beamed. “One day I'm gonna sit at the top of the table.”
Nitro could believe it. The kid hadn't put a foot wrong, and there were now devices waiting to be detonated in the bike shop and titty bar. All they had to do was get in and out of the clubhouse, and they were home dry. “You might not wanna let Bugs hear that. I reckon he'll not let go of that gavel without a fight.”
Dan shrugged. “Meh. He's old, reckon he'll be retiring pretty soon, an' when he does, I'll be waiting.”
~oOo~
There was a bridle path that crossed Hope Farm. It was rarely used, Mouse assumed, because the local girls on their well bred ponies were too afraid of the nasty Anarchists. This suited her just fine, and as she and Rodney plodded along the muddy track with Sid following closely behind, there were no riders or dog walkers to disturb them.
She was pregnant. How the fuck had that happened? Well she knew how, of course. And she knew when. That stupid fucking moment after they'd been out on his bike when lust had overridden common sense.
This was her fault. Nitro had wanted to stop, but she'd assured him that it would be okay. And like a fool, she hadn't thought to go to the chemist and get a morning after pill. She was all on her, and there was no need for Nitro to know. She'd just go to a clinic somewhere and get rid of it, then they could carry on with their lives.
It was just a few cells, not even formed. This wasn't a baby.
Somewhere in the back of her mind were images of Nitro playing with the kids that lived on the farm. There was something about his easy-going manner that attracted them to him, and she didn't doubt that he would make a great dad. She was pretty sure that, if he was asked, he'd say he wanted kids.
All the more reason to finish things with him.
She was doing the right thing for everyone. Her and Nitro's relationship wasn't established enough to contemplate starting a family, and she wasn't equipped emotionally to be a single parent. A kid deserved better than a mum who didn't know how to take care of it, and an absent dad who was a career criminal. And it certainly didn't deserve to have two parents who were only together because its mum got knocked up. Yeah, this was definitely the best thing.
So why did she feel so guilty? And why the fuck was she crying?
A tug on the reins told her they had come to a stop. The horse was taking advantage of the fact she wasn't paying attention, and was never one to miss and opportunity to gorge himself on the clover that grew along the side of the track. Mouse pulled his head up, and turned him around.
Digger was leaning against the barn wall as she rode back into the yard. He looked up and frowned. “Have you been crying?” He took the reins as she dismounted. “What's up?”
She'd had no intention of telling Digger, but her mouth obviously hadn't got that particular memo. “I'm pregnant.”
“Ah.” He began unbuckling the horse's girth. “I'm taking it that this isn't the time to congratulate you.”
“Not remotely funny, Digs.” Mouse took the saddle from him and hung it over one of the gates that dissected the barn into stalls.
“No. Sorry.” Digger smiled and patted the horse's neck. “I'll stable Rodney. You can go an' put the kettle on. Then we'll have a cuppa and you can tell me all about it.”
“What's to talk about? I can't have this kid.” Mouse sat on a upturned bucket and began to roll a cigarette.
“No, of course you can't.” Digger snatched the cigarette from her fingers and lit it. “Cos you don't have a massive support network, an' a bloke who worships the ground you walk on.”
“You could try just shutting the fuck up and supporting my decision.”
Digger coughed and dropped the cigarette into a bucket of water. “I could. An' once I've said my piece, I will. Mags won’t say anything—I'm guessing she knows—she'll just go along with whatever you decide and keep her opinions to herself, so it's down to me to talk some sense into you.” He led Rodney into a stall and took off his bridle. “You know what your problem is?”
“No, but I'm sure you can't wait to tell me.” She knew opening her stupid mouth had been a mistake.
“You're scared.”
No shit, Sherlock. Mouse rolled her eyes, but said nothing.
“Being scared ain't the problem, though.” Digger hung up the bridle and found a bucket to sit on. “The problem is that you don't trust anyone enough to hold your hand. When have I ever let you down, Mouse? When has Mags or Steve? C'mon, give me one example of a time when we haven't been there for you.” He cocked his head to one side. “Still waiting. Nope? Right, so why do you think we wouldn't be there for you if you had a kid? An' what about Nitro? He fucking loves kids. I s'pose you're planning on just having an abortion without telling him.”
“Pretty much.”
“And how do you think that's gonna impact on your relationship, huh?”
“We don't have a relationship.”
“Oh yeah, I forgot. Pity no one told him.” Digger leaned forward and rested his forearms on his knees. “Every day, he's called. Every fucking day. I dunno why he can't come home, but it ain't cos he don't want to. He loves you, Mouse. You need to talk to him 'bout this.”
“He'll just try and persuade me to keep it, and then when the going gets tough, he'll bail.”
“So you thought you'd get in first.” Digger shook his head. “Gotta protect that heart of yours, huh? Don't matter that he's a decent bloke who thinks the world of you, or that he'll be a great dad even if things don't work out between you. You've decided he's gonna let you down, so you turn tail and run like the scared little girl that you are.”
“Fuck you, Digger!” Mouse stood and kicked the bucket across the yard. “It's my life. My body. And I'll decide what I'll do with it.”
Jesus! It was like living with Jiminy, fucking, Cricket. What gave him the right to say that? Mouse stormed across the yard towards the house.
Maggie looked up and grinned as she pushed open the door. “Ah, just in time.” She held out the phone. “Nitro wants to say hi.”
Fuck.
Reluctantly, Mouse took the phone. “Hi.”
“Hey, punk. I was beginning to think you were avoiding me.”
She had. “I've been ill.”
“Yeah, Maggie said. You're okay now, though?”
“Yeah.” Apart from being pregnant.
“Still pissed, huh?”
“A bit. When're you coming home, Nitro?”
“I dunno. Soon.” She heard his intake of breath. “I miss you, Mouse.”
She missed him, too. “I'm...”
“You're what?”
Shit. What was wrong with her fucking mouth? “Nothing.”
“C'mon, punk. Out with it.”
“It's nothing. I've got to go.”
“Mouse. Talk to me. Please.” He fell silent for a beat. “Kinda need to hear that we're okay, right now.”
“Do you love me?” Okay, so her mouth had completely disengaged itself from her brain.
“More than that. I like you.” He laughed, but didn't sound happy. “That probably don't mean much to you, but to me, it means helluva lot. Kinda don't want to lose you.”
Mouse was aware of Maggie watching her closely. She took a deep breath. “I'm pregnant.”
He hung up.
~oOo~
“You okay?” Dan zipped up his coverall and leaned on the station wagon that they'd stolen from a lot about ten miles out of Tacoma. “You look like you've seen a ghost.”
Mouse was pregnant. He was going to have a kid. “Yeah.” He grinned. “Yeah, fucking perfect.” He shrugged the coverall over his shoulders. “Let's get this done.”
He shouldn't've hung up on her. That was a dickish thing to do, and she was going to be so pissed. But now wasn't the time for baby talk. He shouldn't've called her at all, really—
he needed to keep his head in the game—but he'd needed to hear her voice; to tell her that he loved her. Just in case he never got another chance.
25
There was a security camera on each corner of the single storey clubhouse, as well as one on the front door. Nitro's plan had been to attach a silencer to his Glock and shoot the two at the rear of the building, then approach from a narrow alleyway that ran behind it and the building next door. It wasn't a perfect plan, and in an ideal world—one where he had two feet—he'd've gotten up on the roof next door, jumped the narrow gap between the buildings and dropped down through one of the skylights.
He'd explained this to Dan as they'd walked along the silent street, and the kid hadn't hesitated. “I'll do it. I'll be able to reach the cameras from the roof and move them so they're pointing upwards, then I'll get in through the skylight, and let you in through the window.”
It was a good plan, but Nitro hesitated. “You're gonna have to be real quiet. It looks as though the place is empty, an' I doubt it's alarmed, unless they like the cops sniffing around if the thing goes off, but we can't take anything for granted.”
Dan grinned. “I've been busting into places since I was twelve, I'm good at this shit.”
He was, too. Nitro watched as Dan clambered up the drainpipe of the empty store next door and jumped to the clubhouse with the agility of a cat. As soon as the cameras were pointing at the sky, Nitro made his way to the window and waited, hoping that his calculations were correct and the skylight was actually above the room the Rats used for church.
He didn't have to wait long. After a few short minutes, Dan pushed open the window. Nitro handed the prospect his rucksack, then hauled himself inside. The window was higher than he'd anticipated and his landing wasn't exactly graceful, or completely pain free. After taking a second for the shockwaves in his stump to die down, he pulled out a small flashlight and got to work.
“What's that?” Dan looked up from the old-fashioned safe in the corner.
Nitro pulled on some latex gloves and unscrewed the glass jar. “Home-made napalm. This will burn through pretty much anything.” He grinned as he began smearing the jelly-like substance over the door. “Remind me to give you the recipe. How's the safe coming?”
Dan pulled out what looked like a bunch of skeleton keys. “I'll be in it in no time. Fuckers deserve to be robbed using crap like this. Doesn't even have a combination lock.”
“Good, cus I don't want to be here longer than we have to.” He pulled out the detonator and placed it next to the door. Dan shifted nervously, and Nitro tapped the cell attached to it. “Relax, it won’t blow till I make the call.”
The safe door swung open. Dan reached in and pulled out a bundle of bills. “Jackpot!”
“Shhh, keep it down, dude.” Nitro shook his head, then pulled an aerosol can from his bag. “Just one more thing. Dunno if it'll work, and it might be destroyed by the fire, but it's worth a shot.” He walked around the table to the huge, ugly fucking rat painted on the wall and sprayed 'Serpiente' across it. “Fuckers are stupid enough to fall for that, I reckon. Okay, kid.” He shoved his stuff into his rucksack. “Ready when you are.”
Nitro pushed open the window, pulled his Glock from inside his coverall, then hauled himself onto the ledge and dropped down on the other side. As his feet hit the ground, a movement to his right caught his eye. He turned as a figure moved in the darkness. There was a flash, a loud bang, and searing, white hot pain. Everything seemed to happen all at once, but at the same time seemed to move in slow motion. As he staggered back, Nitro pulled up his gun and fired.
“Nitro!” Dan dropped down beside him. “Shit! You're hit.”
“I'm okay.” Nitro tried to sit up, but he couldn't get his right arm to move. “Did I get him?”
Dan glanced over his shoulder. “Yeah.” He grinned. “That was some shooting. You took his face off. We've gotta get out of here. Do you think you can stand?”
“Yeah.” Fuck, his shoulder hurt. “Help me up.”
Dan helped him to his feet and leaned him against the wall. He picked up the rucksack and the Glock before grabbing Nitro's good arm. “C'mon, we need to get you to a hospital.”
Nitro shook his head, and immediately regretted it as a wave of nausea washed over him. “No hospital. Just get me back to Seattle.”
“Everyone is on the Black Hills Run.” Dan was practically carrying him along the alleyway.
“Then take me to Bugs' place. His ol' lady can fix me up.” Nitro wanted to say that it was just a scratch, like in the movies, but his arm and chest were already slick with blood, and it hurt. Shit, it hurt a lot.
After about a million years, they reached the station wagon. Dan opened the rear door. “Get in the back. I need to look at that.”
“No!” If anyone touched it, he'd pass out. “It's okay.”
“You'll bleed out, man.”
“No I won’t. Just get the burner out of the bag, and get us the fuck out of here—slowly. We don't want to draw attention to ourselves.”
Dan passed him the cell. “Shouldn't we get further away?”
“I'll wait until we're a mile or so away. Incendiaries only make a little pop.” Nitro forced himself to grin. “But the bike will go with more of a bang.”
The muffled boom and sirens in the distance, as they headed out of the city, told him he'd been successful. Now all he had to do was stay alive. Gritting his teeth, he unzipped his coverall and pulled his cell from the pocket of his jeans. His vision blurred for a moment, Nitro blinked and focussed on the screen, then hit call.
“Hello?”
“Mags...” He swallowed as a fresh wave of pain radiated from his shoulder. “I need to talk to Mouse.”
“She doesn't want to talk to you, I'm afraid.”
“Don't give a shit what she wants... I need to talk to her. Now.”
He could hear voices—an argument—in the distance. Come on, Mouse, just pick up the goddamned phone.
“You hung up on me, you cowardly piece of shit. Well there's no need for you to worry, I'm getting rid of it. And you might as well stay where you are, cos if I never set eyes on you again, it'll be too soon.”
“Don't.”
“What?”
“The kid... I want the kid.” Nitro tried to take a breath. “Want us to have a kid.”
“Oh. So why did you hang up?”
“Bad time... Couldn't talk.” He was dizzy with pain, and maybe Dan was right about him bleeding out, because he was struggling to stay awake. “Still... can't. Gotta... go.”
“Nitro, wait! What's wrong?”
“Nothing. Gotta... go.” He closed his eyes.
“Nitro? Talk to me. Please.”
God, he needed her so much right now. “Kinda... hard.”
“Why? What's wrong?” He could hear the panic in her voice.
“Kinda... got... shot.”
“Oh fuck.”
“S'okay. Just... a scratch... I'll...” He felt himself drifting away as the cell fell from his fingers. He'd always wanted to say that.
~oOo~
“Nitro!”
There was a thud, and a rumbling sound—an engine, maybe? Mouse felt her knees buckle. “Nitro!” She sank to her knees, her breath coming in short gasps. “Oh, God. Please, no.”
“What's wrong?” Maggie crouched down in front of her and took the phone from her hand. Before Mouse could stop her, she hit 'end call'. “What did he say?”
“He... he's been shot.” She stared at the phone in her friend's hand. “I think...” She shook her head. No, he couldn't be. “He...” She couldn't say it.
“Shit.” Maggie pulled her into her arms. “He'll be okay, Mouse.”
“You don't know that. You didn't hear him.” She snatched the phone back. “You hung up on him. He...”
“He'll call back. He isn't going to die.” Maggie pulled her to her feet, and led her to the table. “Sit down, you've had a nasty shock.”
She didn't wa
nt to sit down. Mouse shook her head. “I have to...” What? What did she have to do? Nitro was thousands of miles away, maybe dying. Maybe already dead. She laid her hand on her stomach. He'd told her he wanted this baby, and then he'd... Oh God. It felt as though she was suffocating. “I have to get out of here.”
The front garden of the farmhouse was always a riot of colour this time of year, and it was one of Mouse's favourite places, but now she couldn't see the flowers or hear the buzzing of the bees. Her vision was blurred, and the screaming in her head was too loud. She stared, unseeing, at his name on the screen on the phone in her hand and pressed call.
“The person you are trying to reach is unable to answer your call. To leave a message, press one.”
“Nitro.” Her voice sounded alien to her ears. “Please don't be dead. I love you, I... I know I've been a bitch, and I'm sorry for all the horrible things I've said. I didn't mean them, I was just scared.” She swallowed. “I didn't want to get hurt... I didn't want to need you, but I do need you, Nitro. Please come home. Please be okay.”
She hadn't heard Digger approach, and was only aware of his presence when he gently touched her arm. Mouse turned and fell into his embrace. “What am I gonna do, Digs?”
“You're gonna come back inside and wait. If we haven't heard anything by tomorrow, we'll go to Bristol and find someone who can tell us what's going on.”
“But he could be dead. He could have died thinking that I don't love him.”
“He knows.” Digger kissed her forehead. “And he isn't dead. Until we hear otherwise, he's alive, d'ya hear? Nitro is alive.”
~oOo~
“Nitro, buddy.” He could hear Dan, but he sounded faint, as if he were a long way away. “C'mon, man. Stay with me, we're nearly there.”
He felt the car come to a halt, and he could hear a woman's voice. Nitro forced open his eyes as the door opened. “Hey... Yaz.” It was getting hard to breathe.
Yaz smiled. “Come on, let's get you inside. My friend will have you patched up in no time.”
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