“If you can heal and understand what people are feeling, why would you ever want to leave?” she asks.
I swallow, not sure how to answer. Some of the most amazing experiences of my life have happened with hemazury. Healing my knee. Being with Karl, feeling his passion for me, helping other people heal. Why does everything have to be so complicated?
If I could go back in time, would I give up the awful experiences I’ve had here, knowing that I would also lose all the amazing moments? Would I give up seeing my biological parents or my relationship with Karl?
No, I wouldn’t. But I don’t have to live in constant fear to keep having good experiences, either. I’ve learned a lot here, but if I stay, the stress and anxiety I feel will be my constant companion for the rest of my life.
“Brit, people here hate me. They’re trying to kill me. Even now, I’m not sure we’re safe. Buried in snow, yes, but who knows to what extent they will go to kill me.”
Brit shudders. I expect her to argue with me, to tell me that no one would want to kill me. Instead, she says, “I understand how it feels to have people want to hurt you. It makes you feel surprisingly vulnerable, and it’s something that hangs over you all the time. It taints even the good moments, like playing soccer with your best friend you haven’t seen in forever.”
I blink back the tears, surprised by her understanding. “You, what? How did you know?”
“I guess I haven’t told you yet. The bike accident wasn’t an accident. People were trying to kill me, too. I’m immune to the virus they plan to use to destroy the world.”
I nod, and then I shudder. “What are we supposed to do Brit? According to everything you’ve learned about the Sapphiri, I’m not safe in the world I grew up in. And, I’m not safe here. I don’t even know who my enemies are here.”
“Yeah. I’m a little disappointed. When we got here and the guns got dropped, I was hoping I might be safe in this place for a while.”
We exchange a glance.
“Brit, I did something foolish,” I say.
Realizing that I’m not going to kick the ball anymore, Brit walks down the corridor until she can put her arm around me. She smiles. “What could you have done that’s foolish, Lydia?”
How can I put my feelings into words? I blush and kick at the snow.
“Was it as foolish as taking a granola bar from a complete stranger and eating it? Or as foolish as only thinking about soccer when I should have realized people were trying to kill me?”
I laugh. “More foolish than that, Brit. And selfish.”
Her arm tightens around my back. I lean into her and our shoulders touch such that her skin touches my skin. I feel her love and concern for me. Brit’s my friend. I think back to our carefree days flying across the country together for soccer games. What a different world that was. I was lucky to know her then, and I’m lucky to have her here now.
“I got married,” I blurt out, “and now I’m pregnant.”
Brit feels a rush of surprise, and then she pulls away so I can’t feel her emotions anymore. She looks at me for a minute and then she blushes and looks away.
“I know, right?” I say. “I can’t believe I did it either. I knew enough about Azureans to know I would get pregnant. I could have made a different decision. Instead, I thought about myself and what I wanted. I didn’t think about the fact that there isn’t a safe place for a child right now, let alone me. But, I’m pretty sure it was the conception of the baby—a combination of Azurean and Sapphiri—that brought you and the other Sapphiri here. I know she’s in there—I can find her when I explore my body with hemazury.”
Brit wrings her hands together and is quiet for a long time. “I can see why you’re scared,” she says. “Especially when you’re dealing with magic you don’t understand—like, why us? and why did metal come through the portal?”
“Scared doesn’t describe half of it,” I say.
Brit nods and when she looks at me, her eyes are caring and sincere. “I can’t even imagine what it would be like to have a baby coming. Though I’ve imagined what it would be like to be married a lot of times.” She blushes. “Though I’m glad I’m not married to any of those guys right now.”
She gets me to smile. For just a moment.
“If only the portal hadn’t disappeared when you got here. That might have made up for some of my selfishness.”
Brit sighs. “I don’t think you should consider what you did as selfish. Sometimes you have to live life. If you spend life thinking only of the reasons why you can’t do something, you’ll never do anything. It’s like when you helped me break up with my boyfriend. I didn’t think I could do it, but I realized I wouldn’t ever be happy until I did. Somehow things managed to work out.”
I blink back the tears and steady my breath. “I don’t see how things are going to work out this time, though. Even if we manage to build another portal and get back home, how can we stop the Sapphiri’s plan? I don’t know which enemy is worse. The army looking for me here, or the virus there. Maybe Bob’s right and they’ll wait for Cassi, but if they don’t, there won’t be anything to go back to. What if we open a portal and bring the virus back here?”
Brit studies me, and the light dances on her white face, casting shadows over her black hair. She smiles and then points her finger into my chest. “Fear. That’s the enemy you need to watch out for. Especially if it starts to drive you away from the ones you love. Love is always right.”
I reach out and Brit steps into my arms and hugs me back.
“I hope you’re right, Brit,” I say.
She smiles. “You know I am.”
25 Avarice
Bob
Being stuck in a snow cave with a few candles must be the worst experience I’ve had in my life. Even worse than driving between Georgia and Pittsburgh a hundred times with Pearl. Especially worse than being assigned to monitor Karl Stapp’s every movement when he was in graduate school.
Even worse than being dumped by Cassi with her gun in my face as I jumped out of the window of a twenty-eight-story building.
But only worse than that because Cassi trying to kill me is all I think about. And I only think about it forty times every minute.
For as long as I can remember, my life’s daydream was escaping the Sapphiri and spending the rest of my days with Cassi. I never thought escaping the Sapphiri would mean getting rid of Cassi. Or, that I was the real leader of the Sapphiri and Cassi was using me for power.
I’m in a snow cave, but all I see are guns in my face. All I feel is Pearl pulling me away from Cassi and out the window.
I can’t sleep. I can’t eat. I can’t live here in this frozen waste.
It’s time to stop this. It’s time to accept that Cassi and I are over. I’ve seen her glowing eyes, and I’ve seen her point two guns at my face. I watched her shoot Tara in the head.
I sit up. I don’t have a gun anymore, but that doesn’t mean I’m helpless. And, I’m not spending one more night in this snow cave.
Ler, next to me, doesn’t stir. It’s been a frustrating few days for all of us. Ler can’t speak English anymore, and I seem to be the only one left who came through the portal who can speak both languages. Karl says it’s because the language magic only works on full blood descendant of the Forgotten World. I think it’s super frustrating.
Brit and Pearl sleep on the other side of Ler. Quint, who also doesn’t speak a word of English, sleeps on the other side of me. We’re all crammed into a single-room hut.
Miserable. No one can understand anyone, and we’re packed in here. This whole place is miserable.
But it doesn’t matter anymore because I’m gone. I crawl over everyone and out of the hut into the dimly light hallway. A few candles line the corridors. The snow is cold on my bare feet, but it was more important to get out of there without waking anyone than fumbling about for my shoes.
Cold feet? It doesn’t matter. I’ve been in worse situations.
I hurry
through the cave until I reach the corridor where Cassi ran away. It’s dark now. That’s okay. I know the way. I push through the pile of snow and climb out. As I exit, the cold night air of the mountain hits me in full force. A sliver of a moon shines overhead.
Figures. It couldn’t be a full moon tonight because that would have been helpful. I’ll have to squint and stumble through the darkness.
At least Cassi’s tracks are somewhat visible in the snow. In the sharp, crusted-over snow. I step lightly and tread in Cassi’s footsteps to avoid cutting my feet. Unfortunately, it turns out it’s hard to watch your step when it’s dark and your feet are completely numb.
I don’t go for more than a mile before I see lights. And tents. And people. Lots more than just Cassi.
I hide in the trees and watch for a while. There’s no mistaking what this is.
An army.
I wonder if anyone else knows these people are here.
With nothing left to lose, except maybe my feet, I wander into the camp. I don’t go far before someone stops me.
“Hey!” he says. At least that’s what I think he says. I feel the meaning behind his words, but I certainly don’t understand them.
“What’s up?” I say. At least that’s what I think I say, though it certainly doesn’t match the words that come out of my mouth. “Can you find me some shoes?”
The man smirks. “You’re Sapphiri,” he says. “Like Cassi.”
“Yup. I’m with Cassi.” Hopefully the strange words that come out of my mouth don’t betray my lie.
“Not with the Azurean?”
“Who are you, anyway?” I’m done lying with words I don’t know.
Unfortunately, the man straightens at my choice to ignore his question, a shadow crossing his face. Naturally. He doesn’t trust me. That’s fine—I would stab him in the back if I didn’t think it would get me killed. He doesn’t seem like a very nice guy.
“What did you say your name was?” I ask again.
“They call me Que.”
I laugh. “I’ll wait my turn, I promise.”
He looks at me strangely. Idiot. How could he not get the joke? Que, like queue, right? Maybe it didn’t translate, but it was funny.
“Cassi’s here?”
He nods. “She’s the co-leader of the army now. Arujan made the announcement this evening. Apparently, she knows where the Azurean is hiding, and Arujan said the only way to overthrow an Azurean is with a Sapphiri.”
“Why does he say that?”
The man shrugs, like it should be obvious. “It was a Sapphiri who got rid of Wynn.”
I give him a confused look, but he doesn’t get it. I don’t have a clue who Wynn is. Or was, I guess, if he’s not here anymore.
“So, you like Sapphiri?” I wish this guy would go back to my first question and help me find some shoes.
“As long as they help us get rid of the Azureans. Azureans aren’t human—all they care about is power and forcing others to do what they want. We’ll never be happy until they’re all eliminated and Arujan is king.”
Oh great. Now we’ve turned this war into a genocide. At least, if Lydia’s story is right, there’s only one person left in the race they’re trying to annihilate. If that had been the case during World War II, it would have been a short war. But, if a race only has one person in it, can you really call it a race?
Que is looking at me strangely.
“They can’t all be bad,” I say. All one of them. I don’t tell him my ancestors already killed the rest.
“One bad one is enough. Haven’t you heard about this latest one?”
I shake my head.
“Oh. You’re as clueless as Cassi. Anyway, this latest edition is some queen who calls herself Ria. She’s just as bad as any. She took over Sattah and started planting copper around it and killing anyone who opposed her.”
I studied physics, not rocket science. But it doesn’t take rocket science to know why this army is here. Or how Cassi seems to have already manipulated them and taken control. I don’t believe for a minute that this Arujan guy is going to get the best of Cassi.
And boy does this dude have it all backward. It’s not the Azureans who want power. It’s the Sapphiri.
Power.
It’s what the Sapphiri have wanted since Adolar. They wanted control of this world and control of their own destiny. Cassi pursued it back on Earth, and it didn’t take her long after getting here to become the leader of an army with the potential to wipe out Lydia and take the Forgotten World for herself. Meanwhile, she’s developed a virus that will give her our world if she ever finds her way back home. She’s going to be the supreme ruler of two worlds, and she’ll have the virus to wipe out anyone who opposes her. A new world order.
Sheesh. This is bad. I’m sure that no one back in the ice cave knows about this. I’m going to have to go back.
“Dude,” I say. I wonder how that translates. “I’ve been walking all night trying to catch up to Cassi. And I lost my shoes. I’d really like some shoes and a place to sleep.” But I really don’t want to see Cassi.
Que shrugs. “Sure, come with me.” He takes me to his tent and gives me his extra pair of boots and a bigger jacket. What an idiot! Who gives their extra supplies to a complete stranger?
“Won’t you need these?” Not that I care about Que, but I’m planning on bolting out of here the first chance I get. Cassi runs a tight ship. If she’s taken over this joint, she’s well-protected. I can’t touch her. She might as well have those two guns pointed at me. Again. Out-maneuvered with people bleeding on the floor.
“Nah. Cassi says we’re attacking day after tomorrow. No sense in having extra boots if we’re going to be attacking already. Half of us are going to die in the attack anyway, so there will be plenty of extra boots after that.”
“Half of you?” What a pessimist.
Que nods. “Azureans are brutal. But there are so many of us, we’ll take her out before she kills us all. It will all be worth it, in the end.”
I take the boots and curl up with a blanket in the corner of the man’s tent. I don’t fall asleep here, either. But, at least I’m not thinking about Cassi dumping me anymore. I’m still thinking about Cassi. But, not about her dumping me.
Cassi. All she cares about is power. Control. An army. Just what Adolar wanted.
Except. Power isn’t what Adolar wanted. Adolar was loyal to the king. That’s what got him into all the trouble in the first place. He felt like he had to protect the people, and so he didn’t go through the portal and become king. Instead, he stayed and got murdered by Tahvo.
If we really wanted to follow Adolar, we wouldn’t be planning to kill everyone and take over our world. We wouldn’t be creating armies and trying to take over this world.
We would be protecting the people.
That’s a strange thought.
As the closest living descendant of Adolar, that’s what I should be concerned about. Protecting the people.
The thought is novel, but there’s nothing I can do about it right now. I’m in a cold hut, shivering and wondering if I’m going to freeze to death or be slaughtered by a prejudiced army first. Hardly a very helpful position to be in.
Que goes back outside for a while. And then he comes back in. And then he goes to sleep. And then I leave. At least the walk back to the snow prison is better with boots on.
And I thought I was never going back into that hole in the snow.
26 Appreciation
Karl
The first time I met Bob, he pulled a gun on me and nearly broke my cell phone. I was scared of him then. I’m not as scared of him now.
But I fear the army he ran into.
We shouldn’t have let Cassi get away. I don’t think they would have found us otherwise.
“Do you think there really are as many of them as Bob says?” Lydia rubs my back softly, bringing me back to the small, candle-lit room we’ve shared for such a short time.
“How did y
ou know that was what I was thinking about?”
Lydia smirks. “Just a lucky guess. My first clue was that you were staring off into space and ignoring your food. For a long time.”
Lydia’s plate is empty. I shove my not-nearly-empty plate away from me. “I never liked mountain food anyway. We really did eat better in Wynn’s castle.”
“That’s got to be pretty terrible for you—getting stuck with me out here in the snowy mountains.”
She did it. I smile. I don’t know how she did it. I’m miserable, an army surrounds us, we’re all going to be slaughtered tomorrow, and yet the lady I love makes me smile.
“There’s the man I love.” Lydia laughs, and she leans over and kisses me.
“Hey!” I laugh awkwardly against her face.
Lydia leans back. “I like kissing you a lot more when you’re not depressed. I’m battling too much discouragement myself to add your gloom to mine.”
“Not quite fair, is it?” I ask. “I add my feelings to yours, but you can’t touch mine.”
She shrugs. “I can enhance them, though.”
I blush, and she laughs. “I guess that’s just my curse, the curse of an Azurean.”
“I would have thought having thousands of people who hate you and are trying to kill you all the time would be the curse.” I smile wanly. The army really is on my mind, no matter how much she tries to distract me. If only I could think of a way out of this. If only I wasn’t buried in a huge snow cave with no way out except into the middle of the thousands of people surrounding the only exit.
Lydia shakes her head and stands up. “I’m going to bed.”
“With an army about to attack? How can you go to bed?” Has Lydia already accepted her death?
“It’s late, I’m not thinking straight, and I have this little girl to look after. So, I’m going to bed.”
“A girl? There’s no way you can tell already. That little girl isn’t anything more than a ball of cells, and I know you can’t see down to the chromosome level.”
The Sapphiri Page 24