by Rosie Clarke
Laurie was back and the sooner he stamped his authority on things the better. He would ring the Brewery later and let them know he was in charge once more, make certain they were getting their fair share of beer. While he was away Peggy had had to do it all, but now he was home and he intended to keep a firm hand on the reins. This was his pub and Peggy was useful, but he didn’t intend to let her stand in his way. He’d had a taste of freedom and she’d been with that damned Yank so she couldn’t complain. As long as she behaved he’d let her stay, but otherwise…He smothered the thought. For the moment she was useful to him and he’d better keep her sweet…and that meant tolerating the Yank’s bastards.
*
Peggy joined her husband in the bar for the lunchtime rush that day. Everyone was delighted to see Laurie back and he bought several of the customers a drink, making himself instantly popular again, she thought a little sourly. It wasn’t like Peggy to be resentful, but she couldn’t help feeling a bit that way, because Laurie had made it so plain that he was in charge now. After more than three years of being the boss, Peggy felt she was being put in her place and it annoyed her, though she fought the anger inside her. Laurie had every right to step back into his old shoes as the owner of the pub lease. It was his pub and even though Peggy had kept it going almost single-handedly for a lot of the time, she was now relegated to the kitchen, cleaning, and helping out when required.
She ought to be grateful that Laurie was back home. He could rise first in future and get the range hot before she came down and it would be as it had been for years before the war – and yet a part of her resented the way she was suddenly just his wife instead of an independent woman, able to run the business with some help from Nellie and her friends. Yet that was stupid, because it would give her more time to be with the twins, something she’d wanted – and she would be a fool to let her chagrin spoil things.
Perhaps it was that the scales had fallen from her eyes and now she saw Laurie for the selfish man he was – perhaps always had been, and her love had blinded her to his faults, though she thought the change had been gradual, made worse by whatever had happened in Scotland to make him bitter. It might be that he’d become disillusioned with life – or her. What she did know was that she didn’t want to be his wife again, though she could work with him for the good of their family.
Putting her annoyance to one side, she turned to greet Alice, who had come for a second glass of milk stout.
‘Did you hear about the King and Queen havin’ a shillin’ lunch with the miners?’ Peggy shook her head. ‘They said it was a long time since they’d had a better meal…’
‘I could give them something better – but they wouldn’t come here.’ Peggy frowned. ‘Still, I bought some lemons for Shrove Tuesday, but they were sixpence-halfpenny a pound.’
‘No wonder you look a bit glum at that price, Peggy love,’ Alice said, jerking her head towards Laurie. ‘Bit strange ’avin’ ’im about, is it?’
‘Yes, just a bit,’ Peggy agreed. ‘But he has a right, Alice. It is his pub.’
‘And where would ’e be if you ’adn’t kept it goin’ then?’
Peggy smiled, her friend’s belligerent question making her feel instantly better. She was being daft. Folk were making a fuss of Laurie because they were pleased to see him back. Once things settled down it would feel like the partnership it had always been, and make things easier all round. She hoped he wouldn’t want to sack Rose, because she liked the girl and knew she’d settled here. Rose wouldn’t find it easy to get another job she liked as much.
Chapter 10
Laurie looked at his reflection in the bathroom mirror that evening. He’d managed to get through the day without coughing more than once or twice, but he’d had a little bout of it again this evening as he was using the toilet. It must be that the air in London suited him better than up in Scotland, because he hadn’t been able to stop coughing for weeks prior to his return home. Once, when it was really bad, he’d almost passed out and one of his colleagues had reported it to the major. He’d been ordered to report to the doctor just before everything went awry and he’d had an appointment, which he hadn’t bothered to cancel after he was summoned to the major’s office that last afternoon and given a dressing-down.
Laurie bitterly resented the way he’d been treated. Anyone would think he was a damned German spy. He had never once told Eileen anything that could remotely affect the work they did up at the house, but just because he’d upset her she’d written that filthy letter, which had led to the unpleasant interview.
Hearing someone try the bathroom door, Laurie wiped his hands on a towel and went to unlock it. He found himself face to face with the girl Peggy had taken on. She blushed bright red as he opened the door, wearing only his vest and trousers.
‘Forgive me, I’m sorry…’ she said, looking embarrassed. ‘I didn’t mean to disturb you, sir.’
‘I’ve finished anyway,’ Laurie replied, letting his eyes travel over her, because she was wearing a silky dressing gown over her nightdress and he could clearly see the outline of pert breasts. He reckoned that she must have known he was in there because he’d been coughing and she must have heard the water flush in the toilet. Right little flirt she was! Laurie knew the sort and was in no doubt that she was up for it. ‘You’re welcome to use it now, Rose.’
‘Thank you…’ she blushed again and avoided looking at him as she went in and locked the door after her.
Laurie grinned as he walked down the hall to the bedchamber he was using. He didn’t like it that much, but it was the best other than the one Peggy was using and for the moment she wasn’t going to invite him to share her bed. Perhaps he couldn’t blame her for that, because he hadn’t been exactly faithful to her in Scotland. Marie had been his first affair, but she’d been special, and if she’d lived— But to let his thoughts travel that path was too painful and he cut them off swiftly. After Marie, he’d had a one-night affair with another operator at the house and she’d left immediately afterwards and Laurie imagined she’d asked for a different posting, though he had no idea why.
He’d never thought about being unfaithful until he met Marie; he’d felt a bit guilty over that at first but then, after Peggy’s affair, he’d been angry and determined to make up for all the lost chances over the years. Why shouldn’t he make the most of things, after all no one knew what would happen from one day to the next?
Laurie had been more careful in looking for a sexual partner after that and he’d settled down with Eileen, the local landlady for a while, but he’d begun to get bored, because she was too demanding, and then he’d seen that lovely young brunette who was on leave from the Wrens… Meredith, she’d told him, and she was on fire for an affair. Laurie had been happy to oblige her, but unfortunately Eileen had seen him kissing her late one evening and then the fireworks had started. They’d had one hell of a row that night and Laurie had told her straight that he had no intention of giving up his home to move in with her after the war ended. The next thing he knew was that someone – he believed Eileen – had written a spiteful letter to his boss hinting that he drank too much and was of a loose character and talked about his work when he was drunk.
None of that was true. Laurie had never drunk large amounts, but the letter had thrown him into a dark light and it was considered that, in the circumstances, he could not be trusted with secret codes. He’d argued for more than an hour, but the result was the same. Major Harris had told him that if he could be compromised he was a security risk and he was therefore being let go.
‘You’ve done good work for us, Ashley,’ he’d said as he shook hands. ‘I’m sorry for this and I don’t want to let you go but once a doubt is raised against your name I have no choice but to act on it.’
Laurie had wanted to shove the words back down his throat but a coughing fit had overtaken him, and the major had kindly advised him to get himself to a doctor and sort his life out. He’d ignored those wise words, packed his bags a
nd returned to London and funnily enough he’d been fine until this evening. His chest felt a bit tight but he reckoned a dab of Vicks would cure that and he had no intention of wasting time or money on doctors.
*
Rose wished she hadn’t chosen that particular moment to visit the bathroom. She’d needed rather urgently to visit the toilet and the only other alternative was the one in the pub yard, which was cold late in the evenings. Yet if she’d thought a little more she might have known it was Mr Ashley coughing – a harsh hacking sound that reminded her of one of the customers at her father’s pub. Josh Barrow had been consumptive and she’d seen him coughing in the lane, spitting blood-flecked phlegm and once he’d gone so red in the face that he’d almost keeled over.
She didn’t think Mr Ashley was ill though, because he was clearly still interested in sex – and with any woman that took his fancy, if she was not mistaken. Rose had read the look in his eyes the first time she saw him, and he’d made her feel hot and flustered when she met him at the bathroom door. His eyes had gone all over her, making her uncomfortable.
Oh bother the man! Rose had been settled at the pub. She liked Peggy and Nellie, and she enjoyed caring for the twins, and working at the pub. The customers were a friendly bunch and it was a pleasant life, but Rose wouldn’t be able to stay on if Mr Ashley got too interested. She’d had enough of men trying it on in her old life and she didn’t want it to start here. Because Rose’s mother had been flighty, the men imagined her daughter must be the same and she’d had to fend off their hands for years.
Rose sighed as she finished brushing her teeth and put her bits and pieces back into her sponge bag. It would be unfortunate if she had to move on just as she was beginning to make friends; she’d hoped in time she might find a place for herself in Mulberry Lane amongst these people, but if Laurie Ashley continued to look at her like that she would have no choice but to leave.
*
Peggy sat on the edge of her bed, re-reading the letter that Able had left for her in the event of his death. It told of his love and of the money he’d left for her in case she wanted or needed a home of her own.
Had the time come to use that money? Peggy was reluctant to do it and yet she wasn’t sure she could live the rest of her life under the same roof as Laurie. He seemed like a stranger sometimes and Peggy wasn’t sure she wanted to cross that divide. It was easy to stay and just accept that things would go back to the old way, but she’d become used to making her own decisions while Laurie was away and it irritated her now that he was back and assuming that everything would be as he ordered it.
‘Oh, Able,’ she whispered and got to her feet, wandering over to the window to look down at the dark lane. She’d switched off her light because otherwise she would have the warden round banging on the door. It was a long time since they’d had a raid round this way, but the government was warning that it could start again, and the wardens were as strict as they had always been.
Peggy wished the war was over, but even more she wanted something good to happen. It had all been dark and gloomy for too long. Too many deaths, too many widows, too many orphaned children… and too much heartache.
Sighing, she closed the curtains, finding her way back to the bed before switching on her bedside light. Until this evening, Peggy had faced up to all her problems as they came, but tonight she just felt swamped. She had Able’s children and she loved them, but she wanted… Her body ached for the touch of the man she loved and she knew that she was lonely. Oh, she had many friends, and there were men who felt more than friendship for her, but deep inside, she was alone, because the one man she wanted wasn’t here to touch her and kiss her.
‘I love you, hon. I always shall…’
The words were so clear in her mind that Peggy could have sworn Able had spoken to her, but it was because she’d been re-reading his last letter of course.
‘Able, I love you…’ A tear slid down her cheek because the years ahead seemed long and empty.
Chapter 11
‘I wanted to ask you, Dad – will you sign for me to get married this summer? I intended to marry Sheila last year, but her father was ill so we put it off – but I’d like to be married this July,’ Pip said. It was early morning and he’d come down to find his father lighting the range. It wasn’t cold enough to light fires in the rest of the house yet, but the range always had to be kept going to keep the oven hot for Peggy, and they would probably light up in the bar that evening, because in February the evenings could be cold. ‘I know the law says I can’t marry until I’m twenty-one without permission, but I feel older – and I’d like to marry Sheila now. After all, we don’t know whether I’ll come through the war or not. I’ve flown too many sorties to be certain. They say your chances get slimmer with each raid you go on…’
‘Don’t talk like that, Pip,’ Laurie said abruptly. ‘I never heard such rubbish. We all know you pilots do a dangerous and wonderful job – but that doesn’t mean it makes sense for you to rush into marriage with this girl…’ He poked angrily at the fire, sending a shower of sparks up the chimney.
‘You’re not going to deny me the way you did Jan, are you?’ Pip looked at him in disbelief. ‘I thought you’d learned your lesson over that – and thank God Mum saw sense. At least Jan had a little bit of happiness with Mike before it happened…’
His father glared at him. ‘Don’t you think it would’ve been better if your sister had never married him? She would probably have settled down with someone in a secure job by now instead of being a war widow…’
‘So Maggie should never have been born? Well, I think you should be ashamed of yourself,’ Pip said, looking at him in disgust. ‘That’s bloody insensitive rubbish and I’m only glad that Jan isn’t here to hear you. She’s breaking her heart over the way Mike died – and all you can say is that it would be better if they’d never got married. Do you never think of anyone’s feelings but your own? There’s a war on, Dad, and that means we should all do exactly what makes us happy while we can.’
‘So if you’re a burglar you can go out and break into as many homes as you like as long as it makes you happy?’ Laurie shovelled some coke onto the range fire.
‘Don’t be ridiculous! You know very well what I mean,’ Pip said and looked angry. ‘You may see me as a child still, but I can assure you that I’m not. I intend to marry Sheila in the summer, July we thought. I wanted your permission, but if you won’t give it…’
‘You’ll ask your mother, is that it?’ Laurie glared at him. ‘I’m sure she’ll give it to you – but you’re a fool to tie yourself down too soon. That’s what I did and I’ve regretted it all my life. You are in a good job and if you get a chance after the war you could make a brilliant career for yourself, Pip. It is better to wait and marry when you’re older – thirty-something… Besides, Sheila is too old for you in her ways.’
‘Sheila is a few months older than me that’s all. She is a serious girl that’s why you think she’s older, but I like that – I’m not interested in silly girls who giggle and make eyes at everything in trousers.’
‘Well, you won’t get my permission or my blessing if you marry that girl,’ Laurie said. ‘I know I probably can’t stop you – but my advice is to wait for a few years and then make your mind up…’
‘You’re impossible,’ Pip said in disgust. ‘I took your side against Mum when… I thought she was wrong, but now I understand perfectly. If I’d been her, I should’ve told you to clear off.’
‘As it happens, this is my pub, my house – and my business. If anyone has the right to say leave, it is me – but I don’t want to push your mother out…’
‘Because she is too useful to you,’ Pip said angrily. ‘She’s worked herself half to death all these years and then you have the cheek to say it’s yours. She has a right to half of all of it in my opinion and any decent lawyer would support her if she divorced you…’
‘Well, I think you’ve made yourself plain,’ Laurie said,
his lips white with fury. ‘Now, if you don’t mind, I’ll get on with these fires. I’ve got two more to light…’
Pip stalked out of the room and went up the stairs two at a time. He wished he’d never asked for his father’s permission, because he knew his mother would have given it with a smile.
He found his mother making coffee in the upstairs kitchen, the delicious smell of it making his mouth water. His mother had managed to buy some real coffee at a small shop in Commercial Road and she’d kept it for her family as a treat. Sheila was with her, so he bit back the angry words, but when Sheila smiled at him and took her coffee cup back to the bedroom, he sat down at the table and put his head in his hands.
‘Somethin’ wrong, love?’ his mother asked.
‘It’s Dad – he refuses to give me permission to get married in the summer…’
‘Oh dear, I was afraid of that,’ his mother said and poured him a cup of coffee. ‘I’m sorry, love. I know his blessing meant a lot to you.’
‘Not anymore – not after what he said.’ Pip sipped the hot drink. ‘Sheila is going home tomorrow and I’m going with her, Mum. I’ll be asking you to sign for me when we set a date – you will, won’t you?’
‘Yes, Pip, if it’s what you want. I’m sorry you’ve fallen out with your father. It’s a pity he came back too soon. Maybe if he’d still been away he would have signed for you…’
‘I’m sorry if it means he’ll be awful to you again.’
‘He won’t,’ she said and smiled. ‘He can’t hurt me anymore, Pip. I love you and Jan, Maggie and the twins, but I don’t love Laurie now. So he can be mean to me and I’ll get angry, but it won’t hurt – and if things get too bad, I’ll find somewhere else to live and work.’
‘I don’t want you to lose your home over this…’