Divided

by Evangeline Anderson

  “Truth!” she shrieked, motioning wildly. “Truth, watch out! He’s—”

  But just at that moment, the deadly point of Garron’s ghat pierced the dark twin’s chest. It slid in with horrible ease—as smooth as a knife gliding through butter—and came out his back like a long, bloody exclamation point of pain. A pain that Becca felt through their bond—a ripping, slicing agony that hurt like hell and scared her to death.

  “Truth!” she screamed again, feeling like the force of her shriek might rip her throat out. “Truth, no!”

  The dark twin looked at her and then down at the blade piercing his chest in apparent confusion. Then he looked up at his younger brother, one eyebrow raised as if in question.

  “Sorry, Brother,” Garron said grimly. With a swift jerk, he withdrew the blade and stepped back.

  Truth looked at the gaping wound in his chest and opened his mouth, as though he wanted to say something. But instead of sound, a trickle of blood came from between his parted lips and rolled down his chin. He looked at Becca and shook his head.

  “Truth!” Becca was wailing now, disbelief warring with horror in her shell-shocked brain. “Oh, please…please, no!”

  “Re…becca…” It was little more than a whisper. Then his pale gray eyes rolled up in his head and he crumpled slowly, face down to the ground.

  Dead.

  Chapter Thirty-nine

  Oh no. Oh, no. Oh, nonononono…

  Becca pressed the heels of her hands to her eyes, trying to get rid of the image, trying to unsee the dark twin’s final moments. But no matter what she did, she couldn’t stop the memory from spinning like a loop inside her mind.

  The shocked look on Truth’s face, the bloody blade poking out of his back, the way he had said her name and then fallen to the ground… She was caught in it, like some dark spider’s web that wouldn’t let her go. Wouldn’t let her forget that he was…

  “Dead. Truth is dead and I declare Garron the winner of this Y’grin,” the Ancient’s voice penetrated her frantic thoughts. “He has the right to Truth’s female and his pick of any other asset of his fallen foe that he chooses.”

  “Very good,” she heard Garron say. “I will take the female and my brother’s ship.”

  She forced herself to open her eyes and watch what was going on. Had she really just been won like a piece of property by Truth’s brother?

  “His female and his ship. That is acceptable,” the Ancient said.

  “I will also take charge of Far, my brother’s twin,” Garron continued.

  There were restless murmurs among the Rai’ku.

  “I see,” the Ancient said. “And why would you wish to do this?”

  “Just look at him.” Garron pointed at Far’s prone form contemptuously. “With the poison from S’reth’s talons in his blood, he won’t last long. I will bind his body in the char tree in the Forgotten Hollow and let the animals eat his flesh. That way he won’t desecrate the hallowed ground of the elder trees when he dies.”

  “What?” Becca couldn’t keep the horror out of her voice. She covered Far’s broad back, which was barely rising and falling anymore, with her own slighter frame. “No, you can’t—you can’t!”

  “I will take Truth’s body and dispose of it the same way,” Garron continued pitilessly.

  “That is not usual,” T’lar objected, stepping forward. “It is the custom after a Y’grin for the pack to feast on the flesh of the losing contender.”

  Garron spat on the ground at his uncle’s feet.

  “Are you saying you wish to pollute your body with tainted meat?”

  T’lar looked taken aback. “No, I never—”

  “I didn’t think so.” Garron raised his voice. “Both of these interlopers will be bound to the char tree to feed only the lowest beasts of Pax. No dr’gin of the pack will partake in this feast of shame!”

  “Agreed,” said the Ancient before T’lar could protest again.

  “Thank you, Ancient.” Garron bowed his head. He unstrapped the ghat from his forearm and then knelt on the freezing ground to unstrap the weapon from Truth’s still form as well.

  Up until now, Becca had felt frozen to the spot. Now she found she could suddenly move again. She jumped up, leaving Far for a moment to go to Truth. He was lying face down but his head was turned to the side and she could see his face. His eyes were closed and his lips were parted a little, allowing a trickle of blood to drip to the ground below.

  “Truth?” she whispered, putting a hand to his cold cheek. “Truth, please…please don’t be dead.”

  “Come, Becca.” Garron put a hand on her arm to help her up.

  At his light touch, Becca felt something snap inside her.

  “You bastard!” She turned on Truth’s younger brother, her hands hooked into claws, and went for him. “How could you? How could you? You killed him!” She couldn’t see past the red curtain of rage that had fallen over her vision. For a moment her sole purpose in life was to scratch his pretty turquoise eyes right out of his head.

  Garron caught her by the wrists and squeezed hard.

  “Becca, no,” he said fiercely. “Stop it. Just stop it now.”

  “I can’t stop. I won’t stop. You killed him! Your own brother! You bastard.” She was crying now—sobbing actually. Garron still held her by the wrists but he had a helpless look on his face, as though he had no idea what to do with her.

  Suddenly the fight went out of her and Becca slumped down. Garron let her go and she found herself lying on Truth’s bloody back, weeping uncontrollably. They were gone now—both gone. She couldn’t feel either twin through the partial bond they had formed. Her men were dead or about to be dead and she was all alone on an alien world, eighty million light years from home.

  Becca didn’t know how long she cried—it seemed like ages before her tears ran dry and she simply lay there, huddled beside the dark twin’s fallen body. She had never felt more desolate or alone in her life. Truth and Far were gone and it was her fault. All her fault.

  Though she had never entertained thoughts of suicide before, even when Kenneth was shot, now she wished she could die. Well, just give me time, she thought bleakly as her hot tears cooled and then froze on her cheeks. As cold as it is, it shouldn’t take long. She shivered but only a little. The frigid weather wasn’t bothering her nearly as much as it had been. In fact, as strange as it sounded, now that her tears were spent, she was beginning to feel sleepy.

  From far away, she heard the Ancient talking.

  “This judgment is over and you are all free to go,” he said.

  There were some grumbles of protest but one by one the Rai’ku males began to step away from the clearing. From eyes still blurred by tears, Becca saw some of them transform into the floating, flying dr’gin beasts while others simply walked away into the night.

  When the last of them had left, Garron breathed a deep sigh.

  “Thank you, Ancient,” he said.

  “I am sorry things happened as they did,” the old man said. “But you have three burdens to bear and there is only one of you. If you had a dr’gin within I would say that you could fly them on your back. But as you do not, or at least it still has not manifested—”

  “I will help.” A large form came out of the shadows and Becca saw it was a Kindred of some kind. She didn’t know which kind until his eyes flashed golden in the firelight.

  Oh, a Beast Kindred, she thought, hardly interested at all. The cold was beginning to make her feel sleepier and sleepier.

  “I will as well.” Another Kindred came forward. “Apologies, Brother,” he said to Garron. “We didn’t hear of the attack on your lodge until well after it had happened. The Rai’ku told us nothing.”

  “That’s because they knew we would’ve stopped them,” the first Kindred growled. “Sometimes I wonder why we stayed on this benighted planet at all. If my mind hadn’t aligned with a female from Pax…”

  “Time for that later,” the second Kindred said. “W
hat can we do to help, Garron?”

  “Can each of you take a body?” Garron asked. “I will take charge of my brother’s female as I swore to him I would. I need to get all of them to safety before the pack change their minds and come back—all in their dr’gin forms this time.”

  “We can.” The first Beast Kindred knelt beside Becca and moved her gently to one side. “Forgive me, lady, but I must take your mate.”

  “No,” Becca protested but it came out as more of a whisper than a shout. She was so cold now that she could barely move her lips—they felt numb, like all the rest of her.

  The Beast Kindred stared at her with worry in his golden eyes.

  “Garron, this little female is freezing. If you truly wish to honor your promise to your brother, you must take charge of her now.”

  At once Truth’s younger brother came to kneel in front of her.

  “Becca? Lady Becca?” he asked anxiously.

  Becca wanted to slap him or claw his eyes out but the best she could manage was to glare at him.

  “Hate you,” she whispered. “Hate you…forever.”

  “I know.” Garron looked honestly remorseful. “I’m sorry.” He lifted her into his arms and nodded at the two Kindred, who had hoisted Truth and Far over their shoulders. “We have to go now. The Ancient’s clearing isn’t far from my lodge. From there I can take them all in the hovertracker to get their shuttle in the Forgotten Hollow.”

  “I don’t know if this one will make it that long,” the Kindred carrying Far said. “What’s wrong with him?”

  “S’reth clawed him in dr’gin form,” Garron said grimly. “The poison had been in his blood long enough for him to move from stelsis to nadis, I think. He collapsed during the Y’grin.”

  The Beast Kindred gave a long, low whistle. “That’s bad. The poison in his system—”

  “Will be leached out as soon as I can apply some antidote,” Garron said.

  “You have some of that? I thought only healers had it.” The Beast Kindred sounded surprised. “Or males about to enter their first transformation who wanted to be sure the female they chose didn’t get—”

  “Shut up, Rairn,” the other Kindred growled. “Think who you’re talking to.”

  “Oh, of course. Sorry, Brother,” the first Kindred said apologetically.

  “No apologies needed if you’ll just help us get back to my lodge on time,” Garron growled. “Can the two of you run?”

  “These Twin Kindred are a heavy burden but we’re strong,” the second Kindred said.

  “Good, then run! My brother charged me with the safety of his female and his twin. If either of them dies…” Garron didn’t finish the sentence. Becca wondered drowsily why he cared if she died—she certainly didn’t. In fact, at this point death would be a sweet release. Truth was already dead and Far was close behind. Why should she go on?

  Then Garron started running and she must have blacked out because she didn’t remember anything more.

  Chapter Forty

  In her dream, Becca was making a bargain.

  Please, God, she begged, her hands clasped before her, her knees sore from kneeling. Please save the men I love. I know what I did was wrong and I accept the blame for it. But please don’t punish them for my sins. Please just let them live and if you do, I swear I’ll give them both up and go back to the convent. I swear I’ll never even look at them again. Please, please, I’m so sorry…so sorry…

  Look at yourself, whispered a soft voice—the voice of her guilt. “What are you doing with your life? How could you allow yourself to go so off track?”

  “Forgive me!” Becca pleaded. “I couldn’t help myself—I fell in love.”

  “Just like you did with Kenneth. You loved him too and look what happened.”

  “He…he died.” Becca gulped back tears. “He died and it was all my fault—just like what happened with Truth and Far is all my fault.”

  “It is," whispered the little voice. “How many times do you have to repeat the same mistake, Becca? When will you learn your lesson?”

  “I’ve learned it now—I swear I have,” Becca protested. “Please—if only Truth and Far could be okay, I would do anything—anything at all!”

  “Anything? Even leave them behind and never look back?”

  “I…” Becca felt like she couldn’t breathe. Leave Far and Truth? Leave the men she loved with all of her heart?

  “Well?” her guilty conscience demanded. “Answer the question—in exchange for their lives, would you swear to never see either Truth or Far again?”

  Becca thought about it. In exchange for their lives. It would hurt them terribly if she left, but at least they would be alive.

  “I swear it!” she promised at last. “Just let them live—let them be okay and I’ll leave them. Please!”

  “Well…” the little voice seemed to be considering. “I suppose if you’re truly repentant…”

  “I am! Oh, I am! Just let them be all right—please!”

  “Very well. They will be restored to life and health. But you must keep your word.”

  “I will,” Becca promised fervently. “I swear I will!”

  “Good. Then go but remember, Rebecca. Remember your promise…”

  “Becca? Lady Becca, are you well?”

  The voice broke through the fragile bubble of her dream, waking her and making her aware that something was different. It took her a moment to realize that the difference was she wasn’t cold anymore. In fact, she was toasty warm. Also, she couldn’t move her arms or legs.

  “What…?” She looked around groggily. “Where am I? Why can’t I move?”

  “You’re aboard your shuttle.” The person speaking to her was Garron. He was looking down at her anxiously, his turquoise eyes worried. “And you can’t move because we put you in a heat cocoon to reverse the effects of the frostbite and hypothermia you suffered.”

  “What?” Becca raised her head higher—it was the only part of her she could move—and looked around the room which happened to be the main sleeping cabin of the shuttle. The same place you formed the bond with Truth and Far, whispered a voice in her head. The bond you swore to break.

  Becca shook her head. Why would I break the bond? I love Truth and Far. Besides…there’s no bond to break anymore. Because they’re…they’re… For a moment her brain didn’t want to remember but then it came to her anyway.

  Because they’re dead.

  The realization hit her like a ton of bricks and suddenly she couldn’t breathe.

  “Becca? Are you well?” Garron sounded really worried now.

  “No. And I never will be again. Not after what you did.” Becca blinked, wishing she could get her arms free to wipe her eyes. “Can’t you just leave me alone? I know…know you did what you had to do to Truth but I can’t…can’t look at you right now.”

  “Lady Becca, no—it’s going to be all right,” Garron assured her.

  “I don’t see how with everyone…everyone dead,” she whispered. “Did you at least bring the bodies back? Or did you hang them in that horrible tree for the birds and animals to eat?”

  “That was a lie to throw the Rai’ku off,” Garron protested. “I’m so sorry you had to hear it. We were worried you might be upset—”

  “Who’s 'we?'” she asked, dully. “You and the Beast Kindred who helped carry us?”

  “Well, last time I looked I’m no beast.” A tall figure was suddenly filling the doorway.

  Becca stared at it uncertainly. “Far? But how…?”

  “Garron had an antidote to the poison in my system.” The light twin came over to her, moving stiffly. There were shadows under his black eyes and blood still matted his long blond hair but he was alive and that was all that mattered.

  “Oh, Far…” Becca’s eyes stung and her throat was suddenly tight. “I’m so glad you’re all right. I was so afraid…afraid I’d lost you both. I…I’m so sorry about Truth…”

  “Why are you sorry about me?”
a familiar voice growled. A new figure filled the doorway—Truth.

  This time Becca felt like her eyes were going to bulge from their sockets. This can’t be right. I must still be dreaming. The idea bothered her for some reason. Dream…dream…something about a dream? What am I forgetting? But the worried feeling was easy to push away when Truth was standing right there in front of her in the flesh and apparently alive. Except how could he be?

  “You…you’re dead,” she said flatly, still unable to believe what her eyes were telling her. “I saw you die. Garron stabbed you with that horrible arm bayonet thing.”

  “And barely missed my heart!” Truth rubbed the slice on his chest which was still raw but no longer an open, bleeding wound. “I swear, Brother, you nearly killed me for real!”

  “Apologies,” Garron said. “I had to convince everyone you were really dead—even Becca.” He looked at Becca. “I’m sorry for the duplicity, lady—I couldn’t risk telling you that Truth still lived with anyone around. The Rai’ku can fly silently and they have spies everywhere. Forgive me for causing you such pain.”

  “I…but I…” Rebecca shook her head and tried to sit up but the heat cocoon—which looked like a shiny silver blanket—was still wrapped around her too tightly for her to move. “But how is this even possible?” she asked blankly, giving up and looking at Truth. “I saw the blade go into your chest. I saw it come out your back. I even felt the pain through our bond. And then I saw you…saw you…”

  Suddenly the tears came back, welling up and overflowing and Becca found she couldn’t stop them.

  “Rebecca! Oh, sweetheart, no!” She had seldom seen Truth so upset. He came to sit on one side of the bed and cup her cheek while Far came to sit on the other side and stroke the hair out of her eyes.

  Becca sniffed, trying to get control of herself.

  “Never mind petting me—get me unwrapped so I can sit up. I feel like a giant silver burrito in this damn thing!”

  The twins unwrapped her and she sat up at last. She wanted to reach for them but something stopped her, even though she was desperate to feel if they were really there, to make sure this wasn’t still a dream…A dream, whispered a little voice in her head. You had a dream…made a promise…