by Prerna . K
"That's okay but," he pulled her arm and pulled her towards him " but how she dare to change the party." he said smilingly holding her.
I smiled, "you both look good together."
"Seriously,"
"Yeah" I said, they actually look too good together.
We both talked for some time, and then we went to other rooms, to wake them all up from their sleep.
We all went to the resort’s restaurant to have breakfast there. Christina was healthy now, so she also joined us. We all were talking about something when someone interrupted. James was sitting in front of me, I saw his eyes sparkle, I turned back I realized he was Calvin. “Hello, good morning.” He said bringing his hand out. I shacked hands and said good morning.
“Actually I'm alone sitting there; I hope you don’t mind me asking for your company.” He said.
I looked towards my group, they all were looking towards me, “but I'm with my group,” I said.
“No problem you give company to your friend” Ash said teasingly.
I felt like someone executed me from my own country, but anyways I sat with him.
“I hope that was not awkward for you.” He said pleasantly.
“No not at all,” I said.
He smiled, “so that’s your group. It’s too big. I like such friend circles.”
I turned back looking towards them and said, “Yeah, they all are really good.”
Waiter came to ask what we wanted, we both gave our orders, I asked him, “You don’t look like an Indian.”
“Yeah, I m not Indian, I'm Australian; actually I came here to explore Indian music and just learn some more instruments.”
“Oh that’s really nice. How many instruments you know?”
“Some six till now”
“Wow that’s awesome.”
“Yeah, but I want to learn more. By the way do you have an interest in such things?”
“Yeah very much, I love music.”
“What else.”
“I love literature I m a poetess, myself.”
“Impressive, I love poetries, will love to read yours.”
“Of course, I have some poetry catalogs, you can check them out.”
Our conversation went on like this; he was really interesting and passionate about his things. He was somebody whose company could help me in my progress. I was not feeling too inferior in his company, though I knew he was really a successful person, his way of speaking, and behaving with other people made that clear. He was very humble and grounded, I liked him more, and I was impressed. We kept talking for long, as the conversation grew interesting and ambitious.
I felt a tuck with him, and just didn’t want to leave his company.
But all my friends were leaving and our meal was finished, so I had to. I said him goodbye, we shacked hands, he said again in his deep voice, “my pleasure to be with you.”
“Mine too. See you soon.” I said.
We noticed the beach had some unusual enthusiasm, a lot of decoration was going on around, and there was an unusual crowd of people, as if something special was going to happen today.
We asked the local people; from them we got to know today was the “red rose ceremony day” for which all fest were going around for weeks. It was one of the most beautiful ceremonies. It was kind of couple’s day when all the couples across the state came here to join the fest, a red rose ceremony was the starting of this fest, today at midnight all the couples who came here were going to propose each other for marriage or might be their crushes, for a commitment.
This was the start of the celebration of love. It was beautiful to witness and even considered lucky for the couples. Many old couples also came here to feel this blooming love and commitment. Today was one of the most romantic days for all the people living in Goa, especially the couples.
Oh that’s why today there are so many couples on the beach, I thought. They all came to join this evening. The dress code was rose gold for girls and lavender for boys. We all also wanted to be a part of it, though most of us were single but we wanted to see how this celebration was like.
The whole day went like this running all around the shops and streets to get our things. At the evening when all our things were done we all sat together for some time, Ash was really excited about it. She was sure Kim was going to propose her. We all girls asked Lisa if she and Ben had any plan of marrying each other. Lisa said they were still trying to figure that out.
Christina, Maira, Shubh and Jas were not going to accept any proposal if in case anyone proposed. Joseph and Neha were much sorted couples, so I knew they were not going to propose for marriage, right now. My friends were secretly curious to know whether James was going to propose me or not. I wanted him to take the first step but I was ready if he didn’t. I will do it myself.
Jas insisted me to indirectly talk about it to James. But I had no idea what I should talk to him. Somewhere I was also curious about Calvin. I was thinking what if he proposed to me. He was really charming; I knew I was very much impressed by him. Anyways I went to James room, to look at what was going on.
“Were you doing something?”
“Nope, I m waiting for Ben and Maira”
“Why?” I asked.
“I want them to see how I'm looking before anyone. Only the two give me honest opinions.” He said.
“Ohk”
I sat on the bed.
See this; he said pointing to the sunset, which was visible from the little balcony. It was looking way too good, because the sea seems to hold the sun; all the rays were spreading and coloring the water. The birds looked black, crossing the sky, which added more beauty to the scenery. James was standing there, I went and stood beside him, and he looked at me and said.
“So are you ready.”
My eyes sparkled, “for what”, I asked.
“For the ceremony, I'm sure someone is going to propose to you.”
“Maybe” I said thinking he was.
“Come on you also know it.”
“What?” I said smilingly.
“That Calvin likes you, I'm pretty sure he gonna take this chance.”
“Seriously, anyway I don’t know, if I have impressed him.”
“What do you mean?” he asked.
“Nothing”
“You like him, right.” He asked.
I smiled but didn’t say anything. “Umh, by the way, I know a little bit about him, honestly he is too good, you should think about him. Maybe, just saying he is your James, because he is perfection in himself.”
My mind blew, I was not thinking in that angle, I mean. “How can you say that?” I asked him.
“You both connected so well. I mean you liked him by just his voice and in that whole crowd he came to you, and now he is crossing your way out of nowhere. Think about it. And most important, an Australian came to Goa, and you met him, Crazy, Isn’t that. I feel this is it.”
He really confused me; he was manipulating me I thought. Seriously it was crazy how we both met, out of nowhere he came in front of me and we just started talking to each other. Was it seriously something I should understand, was he really the story I wanted. Somewhere, I knew, no. I had that alarm, well blowing in me.
“Hey, what happened?” James said shaking me.
“Nothing”
“What do you think about him?”
“Don’t know, I really ignored him. I mean I liked him since I saw him, and yeah he is amazing, passionate just as I wanted. But I...”
“Not thought about it. Correct.”
“Yeah”
James turned towards me and said, “You have some time to think about it, make your decision. And if he is the one, I m very happy for you that a crazy kid’s illusion and faith finally gave her the best thing she deserved. Don’t rest for small, he is best.”
“Hmm” I was messed; I felt some pressure on my head. It was like suddenly someone shook me out of my sleep. It was too heavy for me, on one hand, I was thinking to
say, James, that he is the one, on the other hand, he was telling me, Calvin can be the one. Honestly Calvin could be the one. There was nothing I didn’t like about him, but since the day James was here I was consistently thinking about him. Now suddenly I was not ready to change my perception. I feared because of this maybe I leave Calvin and later he turned out to be the one. On the other side, my mind was, like keep thinking rubbish, you know your answer.
I took a bath; my head was aching because I was thinking unusually more than I ever do. I tried to control my thoughts and dress myself up.
The red rose ceremony
I had a ring for YOU James
My dress was thin-strapped backless flaunting my shoulders and back. It had a deep cleavage V neck that I loved because I always adore my cleavage line; I don’t like to leave any chance to flaunt it. I absolutely love my body. So the dress was body corn, a little above my ankle, with a side cut till mid of my thigh. I love flaunting my body, seriously. It was seriously beautiful.
I stared myself in the mirror, already being self-obsessed I could not keep aback complimenting myself. And adoring every little feature of my body like a lover, this was one of the best parts of being single; I knew the art of loving myself and looking really adorable for myself. I m really too obsessed with every single feature of my face and body. This helped me to avoid the unnecessary over thinking.
I wore my heels those were not too high, they were just 2.5 inches they were sharp from the front, a perfect v, and had a knot at the ankle that looked beautiful.
When I was tying my pony, someone knocked on the door, I thought it was one of the girls who need my help in something or were ready and had come to see me.
I opened the door, my other hand was holding my pony, the rubber band was between my lips, behind the door, the person was James.
He looked up as I opened the door. I don’t know if he had done something to his face, it had an usual shine, because of the lavender color his face looked more adorable. The outfit was well fitted, which added more to his looks for tonight. He smiled, looking at me,
“You look gorgeous” we both said together, and smiled. The rubber band fall down from the grip of my lips, he picked it up,
“Come in” I said.
“Are you sure?” He asked.
“Yeah, of course, come in.”
I turned towards the mirror, he closed the door, “oh wow”. He said, I realized the dress was backless; “oh shit” I turned towards him. It was awkward. I have to make my hair stop looking at me like that.
“That’s why I was asking if you are sure.”
He came in front of me, standing beside the mirror, while I sat on the stool. He was literally staring me like a lover, I felt too good though. I tied my pony, looked at him lifting my eyebrows.
He said, “Perfect” With a sexy smile.
I looked at my reflection on the mirror and thought, “I'm literally looking too good today.”
“Are you ready?” He asked.
“Yeah” I said.
“Ohk,” he said. Sliding his hand inside his pocket, I just got this for you. He showed me a very thin chained with a little wing-shaped locket. My eyes shined, “that’s beautiful. You got that for me.”
“Yeah, god knows if I will get a chance to flirt with you after this night.” He said in a deep voice then smiled as if it was a joke.
“Who is going to take that opportunity from you?” I said.
He came behind me, put that locket around my neck, I could feel his warmth, it felt so good when he was close, I loved these tickles. He hooked that locket; it was of golden color, it looked perfect on me.
I smiled looking at him. “Now you look absolutely gorgeous, seriously you are very beautiful,” he said holding my shoulders and looking me in the mirror.
“Come in front of me, James,” I said to him.
“Yeah” he said. He came in front of me, I felt like I should tell him what I was thinking about him for so long. I was very nervous and togetherly excited, I took out a box that I got, it was basically to confess him without saying it.
I hand it to him without thinking much, “open it” I said.
“It is a ring box, why are you giving it to me?”
“Did I say you anything when you gave this locket to me, open it.”
“Ohk,” he said with a beautiful smile, he opened it, and he was almost blushing but was confused too. It had two rings, both had two wings, one at left side another at the right side, I blushed after my eyes met his.
“What is this?” he said.
I took one ring out, kept that box beside, and “give me your hand,” I said, I was really nervous thinking about, what I was going to do, but excited too.
He gave me his hand, I passed the ring in the right finger, he was smiling madly.
“Girl, you are mad.” I laughed too.
“Are we marrying each other?” he said laughing.
“No foolish boy. This is a sign…”
“..Of our connection” he said completing me.
“Yeah”
“Ohk cool, so you also thought about gifting me something.”
“Yeah”
“I liked it, but my gift is more beautiful,” he said.
“Alright, But did you understand something?”
“What, I have to understand, I know we have a good connection.” He replied.
I felt a little nervous as he said that, I hope I was not judging his feelings wrong. “Yeah, that is the thing. But don’t you think I want to express something else.” I said.
He looked at me intensely, “what do you mean?” he said,
I held his hand, I was seriously nervous, my hands were sweating, but I said it, “I think you are the one.”
He smiled slightly and asked again innocently. “What do you mean?”
I got some courage seeing that smile; I said “you are James?”
He smiled, “yeah I know that, something new.”
I laughed, “Mad boy” this time I said effortlessly, “you are James, young boy, my James.”
He was reaction less, he was shocked, and his expressions were threatening my courage. I kept looking at him; blood was running up to my face, I could not judge anything.
He said “what.” Leaving my hand, “You are kidding me. Don’t play such stupid games.”
“I'm serious James” I said in a deep voice. Silence grew around us. He looked at me, speechless. He looked tensed; I was growing anxious I not knew what was going to happen.
“This is impossible.” He looked at me, “I m sorry but I can’t,” he said pulling out that ring. “You are mad.” He said and went out of the room.
I was shocked, cold and still, like a stone. I did not know how to react. He was annoyed by me I thought. Thousands of bad things rushed in my head, I was red, and tears started rolling down my eyes, first slowly, quietly, as if it took me a lot of time to understand that he was not interested.
I felt like that, too embarrassed, I did not know how I was going to stand in front of him now. I literally destroyed our bond. Maybe now we were not going to be like before. I judged him and his feelings. (“All fucking dramatic thoughts,” my mind said to me, the part which almost hated over thinking.)
I literally didn’t want to go down, I couldn’t face him, but for some reason I went, when all of the girls came in the room. I said to myself it was okay, at least I said it, leave everything, and just enjoy yourself.
Everything happened so fast and now every dialogue, the moment was fleshing in front of my eyes making me feel worse, more abashed, even like to cry. I curled my eyebrows to give it a thought, was thinking all this rubbish, necessary.
All the boys were sitting together, and already they had booked seats for us. Maira and James they both were not there. Ben came a little late, though Lisa was already here. I wanted him to be here, was he really so annoyed, god. But how and why, what the fuck.
Neha and Lisa went beside their partners. Ash sat in front of
Kim, and I was in front of Ben. Lisa complimented me, saying “you look really good today.” I smiled in response, and said “you too dear.”
We all had no idea what to do; there were many couples around, who were just sitting like us. There were two oldies couple also, my eyes stuck on them. I was so bedazzled looking at both of them, they looked happy together.
After some boredom, there came a storyteller who was telling his love story, which was not too unique but the way he presented it, was really interesting and humorous. This added some life to the night. Some two-three couples came and they told their stories in a poetic way which was actually too good, they had awesome coordination, and way of expressing themselves. I liked it. Some couples from the crowd went and narrated their stories, one couple even proposed her to marry him, it was so beautiful. The way she reacted, that was so catching.
I felt sore, thinking about James, but I could lose myself in these stories, because I loved the concept of love.
It makes life much easier and happier.
This thing fascinates me the most. Love never ends, never, it lives with us, that’s a different thing we think it is dead or taken away from us. All that we loss is a habit of being with someone, not love actually.
We just lose people, but not love, just that loss is breaking, and we can’t handle it, but because of some pain and unease I don’t feel like to rag love. Love is the only property that no one can sieze or take away from us. As long as we live it survive in us.
After some time, the narrator asked all the people who wanted to propose any girl or boy, to give their names, a note for the lover with a red rose to the person standing in front of each row, in the white dress. I noticed in front of every row there were two little girls and two little boys in white dress. “Wow so cute,” I said, because it genuinely was. “So this is the red rose ceremony,” I thought. All of us were asked to close our eyes until the speaker command to open our eyes again.
“Cool, I love cultures,” I thought. Slow tunes were played, for the first minute, there was total silence, the speaker guided everyone to stand up and move to the kids if they wanted to propose. Slowly, slowly, I could hear the movement of feet dragging on the floor, walking towards the kids. Secretly I was wishing, “if James also wrote something for me. Or should I do It.” without him, I literally did not feel any excitement in me for any other proposal.