“Bennett, what’s happening here?” Mark is standing beside me. I hadn’t even realized he was there.
“I had a brother,” I say.
“I know, man. I’m sorry. He died young,” he says.
“Really? How young?” I ask.
Mark looks at me with a narrowed gaze. “What do you mean? Are you saying you didn’t know you had a brother?”
“I was taken out of my drug addict mother’s house at age four. I don’t remember much,” I scoff.
“Shit,” Mark hisses. “I shouldn’t have given you the file.”
Anger rises inside me. “I’ve never inquired about my family, but I have a right to know. Please. I grew up on my own. If I have family out there, I want to know.”
Mark takes a deep breath. He looks like he doesn’t know what to do.
“Mark, please.”
He walks over to his office door and closes it.
“How old was my brother when he died?” I ask. Did he have an illness? Was he well taken care of?
“He was twenty, Bennett,” he says, eyeing me in this weird way.
“Twenty?” That’s fucking young.
“You said he grew up with an aunt and uncle?” I ask.
“Bennett, your brother was a SEAL,” he says carefully, and my stomach bottoms out, and it’s hard to breathe. I shoot up to a standing position and stare at Mark.
“My brother who was a year younger than me became a SEAL?” My heart pounds in my chest and rings in my ears. I had a brother. Why didn’t they keep us together when I got put in the system?
“Yes, he was raised in Jersey. His father was a junky, but his father’s sister took him in when child services came to your mother’s house. You were both very neglected and undernourished,” he says.
“I feel sick,” I say.
“Sit, Bennett. Fuck. I’m sorry, man. I had no clue you didn’t know,” Mark says, sounding sympathetic.
“Tell me what you know,” I insist, biting back tears. Fuck, I don’t cry. What is happening? I take a seat like he says because my head is spinning.
“Not much man. I just know that his name is Liam Montgomery. Died in Afghanistan.” He pauses and swipes a hand over his mouth. I look down at the paper I’m holding; it says page one of two down at the bottom.
“Where is page two?” I ask.
Mark’s eyes turn wide. “My desk is a fucking mess. I can never find anything.”
“Mark, from one SEAL to another, I call bullshit.” My tone is stern and my gaze on him is unforgiving.
“Fuck,” he mutters under his breath, and within seconds, he pulls a piece of paper out from a pile, knowing exactly what he was looking for and where it was. Organized chaos at its best.
I grab the paper out of his hand and read.
Next of kin: Avery Montgomery and daughter, Jessy.
No, no, no. A cold shiver racks my body as I read the words over and over again. There must be some mistake.
“This can’t be right,” I say.
“I didn’t realize you were dating his widow until we were sitting at Dreamboat’s kitchen table and you and Quinn brought him up. Your brother was on Thomas Wells’ team. He died in the IED. I’m really sorry for withholding the information, but you know how it is. We find stuff that no one knows, and it isn’t my place to let you know. Those are the rules we live by . . .” Mark tries to explain himself, but I am not hearing any of it.
I stand from the chair, take the pages with me and stalk out of his office. I walk past all the other offices.
“Hey, man.” Sutton stops me to talk.
“Not now,” I splutter. I walk right out the doors of Cole Security headquarters into the brisk winter air. The cool air does nothing to release the tightness in my chest. My brother was Jess’s father.
There is no way that Avery will want to be with me once she finds out.
Chapter Forty-Five
Bennett
I reach the end of the parking lot, and my lungs burn as I hunch forward, bracing my palms on my knees. I hold onto the papers tight as the wind blows. How can this be? I had a brother I don’t remember. We were separated. He had family who wanted him. Liam Montgomery, Liam Montgomery. My brother.
What would my life have been like if we hadn’t been separated? Would I have felt so alone? Would we have been there to lean on each other? I’d always wanted that sense of family, yet I was too much of a coward to go out and get it. Maybe I just hadn’t met the right girl until Avery, his widow. Fuuuuck. Why me?
I straighten myself out and scream at the top of my lungs. Why did she have to be his wife? Why did Jess have to be his daughter? I can’t replace him, my own brother. It’s so wrong. If Avery knew, she wouldn’t have given me a second glance. This whole situation sickens me.
I fold the papers and tuck them into the back pocket of my jeans, then I grip the sides of my head. I’m losing it.
“Bennett,” someone says my name carefully. I whirl around to see Quinn watching me like I’m a wild stallion, unpredictable and maybe a little unhinged.
“Did you know? Tell me the truth,” I say, clenching my jaw. Why does this hurt so bad?
“I didn’t, but Mark just updated me. He thought you might need a friend,” he says.
“This is so messed up,” I say.
“I met him, Bennett. I knew your brother,” he says.
“What was he like?” My voice cracks, my throat as dry as sandpaper.
“He looked nothing like you, for starters,” he says. “He was tall, a bit of a smart aleck.” He laughs almost to himself. He pushes his hands into the pockets of his jeans. “He was a good guy, a dependable member of his team. I remember when they died. I had no idea you two were related,” he says. “I’m sorry, man.”
“What do I do about Avery? She won’t want me. I’ll lose her.” I rub my hand on the back of my neck.
“If she loves you it won’t matter,” he says.
“He didn’t treat her right. Things were messed up between them,” I say.
“You’re not him,” Quinn says with such confidence.
“I don’t know who I am. I’ve spent most of my life lost, searching for a place to belong. I found the woman of my dreams . . .” I snicker. “Only to find out she’s my deceased brother’s wife.” I sigh. “I need to do the honorable thing and walk away.”
Quinn takes a step toward me. “You can’t make that decision for her. If you and Avery have love, then it’s worth fighting for. It’s not like you knew she was your brother’s wife.”
“It doesn’t change the facts, though.”
“Well, my friend. . . there is only one way to find out,” he says.
“Yeah.”
He claps me on the back. “Have some faith.”
I nod. If only it were that easy.
“You good?”
“I don’t know if I’m good, but I’m okay to be out here on my own if that’s what you’re worried about.”
“Okay.” He heads back toward the building. I embrace the numbing, cold air
My cell rings. Avery’s name lights up the screen. She’s due back in Jersey in two days.
“Hey, babe.” I fight to keep my voice even.
“Hi,” she says, sounding like her cheerful self. Her sing-song voice reminds me of the first time she came into my room at the hospital. She was this angel bringing me solace through the pain. “How’s it going over there?”
“Oh, you know . . . same old,” I say. How will I break this news to you?
“I guess that’s good. Jess and I are at Magic Kingdom today. This trip has been like a dream. Everything here is magical,” she says.
I want to tell her that she’s my magic. She fixed me, and now I’m going to lose her. I swallow down my pain.
“You’re the magic, sweetheart. I can’t wait to see you guys,” I say.
“I miss you,” she says.
My heart cracks. Will it be goodbye when I tell her the truth? “Say hi to Jess.”
> I hear Jess muttering in the background.
“She says hi back,” Avery says.
My throat clogs. I’m really her uncle. A blood relative.
“Is everything okay?” Avery asks.
I thought I was doing a bang-up job of hiding the anxiety from my tone but apparently not.
“You’re not very talkative today,” she says, and the concern in her tone is crystal clear.
“I was just busy here with something.” It’s not really a lie. “I love you, babe.”
“I love you too, Bennett,” she answers. I soak in her words and engrain them to memory. The thought of losing her rips me up inside.
“’Kay, take care. We’re scheduled to be on a ride in fifteen minutes. We have to stay on schedule,” she says.
“You two take care and stay safe,” I say.
“Thanks. You too.” She blows me a kiss through the phone and the call ends. I squeeze my eyes shut and grip my phone. Please don’t let this be the end of us.
Chapter Forty-Six
Avery
The phone rings twice.
“Hello?” I hear Nat’s voice and I take a deep breath.
“Hi.” My voice shakes.
“Yes?” Nat asks.
I take another deep breath. “Hi, Nat. It’s Avery.” I know I sound hesitant and distracted.
“Avery?” She repeats my name. “Is everything alright?”
I only have her number because Jess stayed with her while we were in Virginia Beach.
“Sorry to bother you. Um . . . I returned from Florida yesterday. Bennett was supposed to be here, and he isn’t. I’ve tried calling his cell, but he isn’t picking up. I’ve called the airlines and checked the news for plane crashes. Honestly, I’m not sure what to do,” I say, my insides shake. Where could he be?
I had spoken to Jess in Florida and she liked the idea of Bennett moving in. He said he would be here waiting for us when we got home. Yesterday, we spent the day traveling and he isn’t here.
“Darn. I’m not sure, Avery. I can call Liam to see if he knows anything,” she offers.
“That would be great,” I say. “Thank you.”
“Of course. Talk soon.” She ends the call.
I pace the apartment. Jess is in school. I didn’t want to scare her, so I didn’t tell her I was worried about Bennett’s absence. She was so young when Liam died but I remember the day he was killed. We had spoken by Skype. He spoke with Jess and told her how much he loved her. He’d never had done that before. I’d always wondered if maybe he felt like something may have gone wrong that day. My morbid thoughts shift to Bennett. What if he’s lying in a ditch somewhere?
I pace back and forth. My nerves are on overdrive. Hopefully Nat calls me back soon. I had planned to continue job-hunting today, but how can I when I feel like such a wreck? I fall back on the couch, staring at an empty TV screen. Where the hell are you, Bennett?
Chapter Forty-Seven
Bennett
I stand in front of my brother’s grave back here in Jersey. They buried him here close to where Aunt Bee and Uncle Jim live. The Montgomerys. Those nasty people raised my brother.
I stare at his name. Liam Montgomery. His stone doesn’t say much other than his birthdate: April 26, 1984. My emotions have been all over the fucking place.
“I don’t know how I don’t remember you,” I say to his stone. “I don’t remember much from the time I lived with our birth mother. Maybe I was too young or maybe I blocked it out. Pretty sure we went through some really rough times with her. I’ve had some bad dreams about being younger, but they are few and far between.” I sniffle. “I really would have liked to get to know you,” I say, and the tears swelling in my eyes begin to fall. “It would have been nice to have a brother. I hope those jerks Bee and Tom treated you well, but I’m guessing, after meeting them, they weren’t a walk in the park.” I scoff. “But they were definitely better than some of the homes I landed in, that’s for damn sure.” I pinch my eyes shut and hold the bridge of my nose with my pointer finger and thumb. “Fuck, how do I say this?” I’m at a loss for words.
“I was caught in an IED explosion not long ago. I don’t know why I had the privilege to survive and you didn’t. I hate that you aren’t here and that you missed your daughter growing up. Avery did a great job. Jessy’s a great kid. Well-rounded and loved. You’d be proud.” A loud sob escapes me. I don’t remember ever crying like this in my life. I was ripped apart when King was killed but I didn’t cry. I didn’t shed a fucking tear, and he was my brother, too. “So, here’s the thing. It seems that fate has kind of fucked us over or played roulette or I don’t even know, but after I got injured, I met a woman and fell in love. I’ve seriously never been in love before. I had lots of female bed partners but none that were worth keeping around. Then Avery came into my life at just the right time. She saved me; she made my heart feel things it’s never felt before. Problem is I didn’t know she was yours. Now, I don’t know what to do. I can’t walk away from her and Jess. They’ve become my family. I don’t want to walk away, but I don’t think she will want me either way when she finds out we’re brothers.” I grip the sides of my head. “This situation is so messed up. I wish I could’ve met you,” I say, then I realize if he were here, I wouldn’t have Avery, and she has quickly become my everything.
“Okay.” I suck in a breath. “I just wanted to come here. Let you know you have a brother that’s grieving your loss because I feel this huge gape in my heart even though we never met.”
I swipe at my damn tears and head back to my car. I need to man up and go see Avery. She needs to hear the truth and it has to be from me.
Chapter Forty-Eight
Avery
“Thanks for getting back to me,” I say to Nat.
“I’m sorry I don’t have more information,” she says. As far as Liam and the guys know, Bennett got on a plane back to Jersey yesterday.
“It is what it is,” I say. I was hoping she would have some news. “Maybe he left me. I hadn’t considered that as an option.” I hiccup, trying to keep my tears at bay.
“I saw how much he loved you. I don’t know what could make him just walk away without an explanation. Liam was very vague with me when I asked about Bennett. If I didn’t know my husband, I’d overlook it, but something was off. Maybe something happened over at Cole while he was here. I can’t pinpoint why, but I feel like all the guys have been on edge these last few days,” she says.
“I wish you knew. I’m racking my brain, trying to understand why he wouldn’t call. Even if he was busy, he could just text and let us know he’s okay,” I repeat myself. The seconds tick by but they feel like hours.
“I’m going to grill my husband later. He’s at Cole this week. He doesn’t leave for deployment for a few weeks, so I’ll be on his case,” Nat says.
“If you find anything, please call me,” I say, desperate for answers.
“Of course,” she reassures me.
There’s a knock on my door. “Nat. There’s someone at my door. Can I call you later?”
“Go ahead. Take care. And remember to keep breathing,” she says.
“Yes, thank you.” I end the call.
With my cell phone still in my hand, I head to the door and check in the small peephole. Bennett stands there with his head down.
I swing the door open. “Where have you been?” I ask angrily when I see he is in one piece.
“Can I come in?” he asks.
His head hangs low and he looks tired and disheveled. “What is going on, Bennett?” I ask my heart rate spiking. He also looks defeated, the way his face falls and his shoulders slump.
“You’re going to want to take a seat for this,” he says, walking past me into the apartment.
My stomach somersaults. “What happened?” His face looks crestfallen. “Just spit it out. I’m too tense and worked up. I seriously thought something bad happened to you,” I say, closing the door and following him toward the family ro
om area.
“Something bad did happen but not in the way you think,” he says. His eerie tone does nothing to calm my nerves.
“What’s going on, Bennett?” I ask. He looks like he just found out his best friend died.
He opens his mouth to speak but seems unable to find the words, then he rubs the top of his head and takes a seat on the couch. His head hangs low between his shoulders.
I take a seat beside him. Any anger I was feeling from his lack of contact melts from my body. Instead, I am filled with this sense of dread. Like something is really wrong.
I place a gentle hand on his thigh. He looks like he’s struggling with something. “You know you can tell me anything,” I say, then pause, because a thought comes to mind. “If this is about us moving in together . . . if it’s too fast, I’ll understand.”
His head snaps up and his gaze holds mine. A look of bewilderment fills his eyes. “Avery, it’s not that.” He inhales a deep breath and looks up to the ceiling, then back to me. “Don’t you understand? From the first time I saw you, you were completely irresistible to me. You breathed life back into me. I was hollow inside. After the explosion, I felt like I had nothing to live for, and then you came crashing into my life, and my heart began beating in a way it never had before. You made me want things I never dreamed I would have. You and Jess are so important to me,” he says.
My own heart melts when he mentions my daughter, too. “So what is it? What on earth is going on?” I ask, feeling so on edge.
Bennett looks right at me. “A few days ago, I was at Cole Security headquarters when I accidentally came across some information.”
“Okay . . .”
He takes another deep breath while I feel like I’m not really breathing at all. “It was information about my past. I was never meant to come across it. The company does security checks on all its employees. You know I grew up in foster care. I never found a family that wanted to adopt me. I went into the system when I was four and left when I was eighteen. What I didn’t know was that I had a baby brother. He was a year younger than me,” he says, looking at me with such heavy eyes that his pain seeps into my heart.
Irresistible: A Salvation Society Novel Page 20