Unchained Memories

by Karen D. Badger

  “Okay, good idea.” Cat adjusted the blankets and the height of the bed. “You worked very hard in your PT. I was proud of the progress you made.”

  “Thanks.”

  “Good morning, ladies,” a cheery voice said from the doorway.

  “Good morning, Julie,” Cat said. “She’s all yours. Billie, I’m going to find Daddy and talk to him about the EEG tests he collected last night. I’ll be back soon.”

  “What do you think?”

  “Well, kitten,” Doc said. “See this right here… and here?” He pointed to a couple of high points on the EEG graph. “They indicate some sort of abnormal electrical activity, but it’s not very pronounced. It’s hard to tell from this data whether epilepsy is the cause of it. We can take another CAT scan and MRI, but with readings this mild on the EEG, I’m afraid we’ll be wasting our time there too. I hate to say it, but we might just have to wait and see if it happens again.”

  “Can’t we start her on anticonvulsants now to prevent another seizure?”

  “That is an option, but I’d rather wait until we have a confirmed epilepsy diagnosis. I’d rather not medicate her for a condition she might not even have.”

  Cat lowered her chin to her chest and reached a hand up to rub her brow. “Daddy, I hate to see her suffer. I hate not knowing.”

  Doc pulled Cat into his embrace. “You need a hug,” he said as she burrowed down deep into his shoulder. “I know this has been hard on you. She’ll get better. I promise.”

  “I know she will,” Cat said into his shoulder, “but I want her more than well. I want her back.”

  “You know, you can let go of my hand,” Cat said as she and Doc walked toward the hospital cafeteria.

  “Not a chance. This is the only way I can be sure you’re eating.”

  “But I’m not hungry.”

  “Caitlain Maureen O’Grady Charland, I won’t take no for an answer, do you understand? You haven’t eaten enough to keep a bird alive over the past three days. Now, you’re going to have lunch with me if I have to hog-tie you to the chair. Is that clear?”

  Cat grinned. “I knew I’d lost the battle when you used my full name. All right, all right. I’ll eat.”

  Moments later, Cat and Doc sat across from each other at a small table in the hospital dining room.

  “Caitlain, you need to eat more,” Doc said. “That salad isn’t big enough to fill a bird’s stomach.”

  “I’m not very hungry. This is fine.” Cat pushed the greens around her plate.

  “It might be, if you’d actually eat some of it.”

  Cat put her fork down and pushed her plate away. “I don’t have much of an appetite. I guess I’m just too worried about Billie.”

  Doc put his own fork down and sat back in his chair. “Spill it,” he said.

  “Huh?”

  “I said, spill it. What’s keeping you from eating and sleeping?”

  “How do you know I haven’t been sleeping?”

  “I have my spies.”

  Cat focused on her hands clasped on the table in front of her. “I’m afraid, Daddy. Afraid she’ll never remember me. I’m afraid of losing her, and Seth.”

  “Seth?”

  “She’s starting to remember. She knows who she is, and she remembers Seth.”

  “That’s wonderful news.”

  “I hope so.” Cat paused for a moment. “We had an argument this morning over why I hadn’t told her Seth was out of his coma. She’s the Billie I met five years ago. She doesn’t know me. She’s living in a time just before we met.”

  Cat put her hand inside the one offered to her by Doc.

  “Give her time, Cat. Take this as a good sign. If she’s recovered part of her memory, there’s a good chance she’ll recover the rest. Keep your chin up, okay?”

  “I’ll try.”

  Cat pulled her cell phone from her pocket and called Jen. She answered after two rings.

  “Hi, Jen. Just checking in.”

  “All right, what’s up?” Jen asked.

  “What do you mean?”

  “Spill it, girlfriend. I know something’s wrong. I can hear it in your voice.”

  “Damn it. You know me too well for my own good. All right, all right. The visit with the kids was great. You should have seen how Billie was with them. It was like nothing was wrong. Several times throughout the visit, she called them by their pet names—quite naturally, I might add. Glimpses of the old Billie kept showing through, but I don’t think she realized it.”

  “That’s great. You were worried it would be tough on the kids.”

  “Well, I’ve only told you part of it. I left Seth with her while the girls and I went to find Daddy to take them home, and while we were gone, Billie had a spell. Poor Seth. It appears memories of him from five years ago when he was still in the hospital came flooding back. She passed out on him.”

  “Oh my God! Is he all right? Is Billie all right?”

  “Yes, to both questions. The good news is she remembers who she and Seth are now. The bad news is her memories stop when he was hospitalized at six years old.”

  “Before or after she met you?”

  “Before.”

  “Well, it’s a start. We have reason to hope now. I have a good feeling about this. It’ll work out. I know it will.”

  “Jen, what would I do without you? I can’t thank you enough for your support.”

  “No thanks necessary. I’m glad I can help.”

  “Well, I’ve got to go. Billie’s counseling session begins soon, and I don’t want to miss it.”

  “All right then, I’ll see you soon. Kiss the big guy for me, okay?”

  “Only if she lets me kiss her for me first.”

  “You might know—too selfish to share.” Jen laughed. “Promise to call me later if you need to talk.”

  “I will. Thanks.”

  One more phone call, Cat thought as she punched the keys on her cell phone.

  “Hello, Art?”

  “Cat? How is Billie?”

  “She’s improving. She’s starting to remember. She knows who she is now, and who Seth is, but her memories stop just before she and I met. In her mind, she’s still a legal assistant. If you come to visit her, she’ll no doubt recognize you, but she won’t remember she’s a practicing lawyer. Just keep that in mind, okay?”

  “She must be confused, huh?”

  “Yes, she is.”

  “Any idea when she’ll be going home?”

  “I’d say in another week or so.”

  “Maybe it would be better if Marge and I wait to visit until after she goes home. That will be one less thing she’ll have to deal with in the hospital. What do you think?”

  “I think that’s a good idea. I’ll tell her I spoke with you and you’ll see her soon.”

  Cat rushed back to Billie’s room just in time for her session with Dr. Connor. When she got there, she was surprised to see Laura manipulating Billie’s legs.

  “Hi,” Cat said as she walked into the room. “Where’s Doctor Connor?”

  Laura looked over her shoulder at Cat. “Hi, Cat. No sessions on Saturday. The doc’s on call though, if you’d like us to reach her.”

  “No, that’s all right. Is it Saturday already?”

  “That it is, Red,” Laura said. “Pretty easy to lose track of time around here, isn’t it?”

  “Oh, yeah.” Cat watched Laura exercise Billie’s arms and legs. “What are you doing?” she asked.

  “Yeah, what are you doing?” Billie echoed from the bed.

  “So, you can talk,” Laura said. “I was beginning to wonder, when you didn’t say a word in this morning’s session. I’m warming your muscles up. We have a pretty taxing workout planned for this afternoon.”

  “Is Ivan the Terrible going to be here?” Billie asked.

  Laura chuckled. “You must mean Joseph, huh? Yes, he’ll be here. Great nickname by the way.”

  “What’s so taxing about this afternoon’s session?�
� Cat asked.

  “Can you say, ‘On your feet, soldier’?”

  Cat knew she and Billie sported identical expressions, eyes wide, mouths agape, and eyebrows raised into their hairlines.

  Laura laughed and, in her best Mae West voice, said, “Close your mouth, you’re catchin’ flies.”

  “Plant your heels on the floor and push yourself up,” Joseph said. “Laura won’t let you fall. You can do it.”

  Billie gritted her teeth and pushed into the floor with all her strength, to no avail.

  Joseph lowered his face to hers. “Lean forward as you push. You’ll be able to feel where the fulcrum point is. The moment you feel like you’re falling forward, allow your thighs to take over and push your heels into the floor.”

  Billie leaned forward and nearly fell off the bed, save for the hold Laura had on the belt around her waist. “I can’t do it,” Billie said.

  “Yes, you can.”

  Billie shot a desperate glance toward Cat, who was watching from her chair in the corner.

  “Red isn’t going to help you. She knows better. Now do as I say and try again,” Joseph said.

  Billie unsuccessfully tried again and fell back onto the bed. “Damn it! I can’t do it. There’s no use in trying. I’ve had enough.”

  “Oh no you don’t.” Joseph bent down and invaded Billie’s personal space. “No quitting. You don’t understand. My patients don’t quit on me.”

  Billie grabbed his shirt front and pulled him down nose to nose with her. “You don’t understand. It hurts. I can’t do it.”

  “Yes, you can.” He grabbed her shoulders and pulled her into a standing position. “Now do it,” he said and released her arms.

  Billie was so angry she didn’t realize she was indeed standing. Laura had a firm grasp on the belt around her middle. Cat rose from her chair in the corner and clasped her hands over her mouth in surprise.

  Billie scowled into his face. The smirk he was wearing only made her angrier. “You bastard.”

  Joseph grinned and took a step back. “I’ve been called worse,” he said as his eyes drew her attention to the fact she was standing on her own.

  When Billie realized no one was holding her up, her knees began to buckle.

  “I’ve got you,” Laura said as she wrapped an arm around Billie’s waist and lowered her to a sitting position on the bed.

  Billie’s eyes were wide with awe at what she had just accomplished. They misted over as she broke into a grin. “I did it,” she said. “I did it.”

  Joseph walked toward the door and stopped to address Billie. “Like I said, my patients don’t quit on me. Tomorrow, we start the real fun. See you then.”

  “Cat, you need to go home, see the kids, get some sleep,” Billie said.

  “No. I won’t leave you.”

  “I’ll be all right. Go home.”

  “No.” Cat sat on the edge of her own cot and crossed her arms across her chest.

  “Please?”

  “No… no… no… no… no. Got it?”

  Billie inhaled deeply. “I don’t want you to get sick. At least lie down and get some sleep.”

  Cat yawned and closed her eyes. “Just a nap.” Within seconds of lying down, she was sound asleep.

  Billie rested her head against her pillows and stared at the ceiling. Who are you, Cat? Why can’t I remember you? Finally, exhausted from a day filled with therapy, she felt her own lids grow heavy and she too drifted off to sleep.

  Chapter 27

  Billie awoke the next morning feeling refreshed. The first thing she noticed was Cat on the cot on the other side of the room. She was lying on her side, her left hand tucked under her cheek and the blanket pulled up to her neck. Red-gold hair spilled out over her face. Billie had the overwhelming urge to brush her hair back and place a kiss on her brow.

  Now where did that come from? She was startled by the intensity of the emotion. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath to calm her rapidly beating heart. When she opened them again, she was staring into two of the greenest eyes she’d ever seen.

  “Cat,” she said, unnerved by Cat’s intense stare.

  “Good morning.”

  “You must feel better this morning,” Billie said. “You looked like hell last night.”

  Cat sat up on the edge of the bed and combed her hair with her fingers. “Why does everyone keep saying that?”

  “Because it’s true. You’re not taking care of yourself. I want you to go home tonight. You need to eat a good meal and sleep in a real bed.”

  “I’ll think about it. I do need to check in at work to arrange another week’s vacation. Let’s see how things go today, okay?”

  “All right,” Billie said, smiling.

  “God, how I miss that.”

  “Miss what?”

  “Your smile. It’s so beautiful. You’re so beautiful.”

  Billie blushed.

  Cat sat on the edge of the bed, facing Billie. She traced a finger down the side of Billie’s face. “I’ve embarrassed you. I’m sorry.”

  Billie looked at Cat with uncertainty in her eyes. She took a deep breath and forced a crooked smile. “You got a thing for bald women?”

  “Only if they have eyes the color of the sky on a sunny spring morning. Know where I can find someone like that?”

  Billie blushed again.

  Cat’s attention was diverted as Billie’s breakfast was brought into the room. “Breakfast is here.”

  “Help me to sit up.”

  “Do you think you should?”

  “Yes. I’m sick of eating lying down.” Billie rolled onto her side, maneuvered herself onto her elbow, and pushed her body upright.

  Cat grabbed Billie’s ankles and swung them over the side of the mattress as Billie grasped the edge of the bed with her free hand to pull herself into a seated position. Billie balanced herself while Cat moved the bed tray in front of her and locked the wheels. Billie grinned as she reached for her fork and began to eat her breakfast.

  Laura arrived at nine a.m., pushing a wheelchair in front of her. “Good morning, ladies.” She positioned the wheelchair close to the bed and locked the wheels. Standing in front of Billie with her hands on her hips, she said, “I’m surprised to see you sitting up. Pretty proud of yourself, huh?”

  “Yes, I am.”

  Laura extended her hands to Billie. “Are you ready for a workout, missy?”

  Billie put her hands in Laura’s. “Just tell me what to do, coach.”

  “Okay, shift your weight forward and press your heels into the floor, just like yesterday. That’s it. I’ve got you. I won’t let you fall.”

  Billie rose to her full height and shifted her body sideways as Laura helped lower her into the chair.

  “Comfy?” Laura asked after adjusting the footrests.

  Billie nodded.

  Laura unlocked the wheels. “You coming, Cat?”

  “Wouldn’t miss it.” She followed them out.

  Laura wheeled Billie into the Physical Therapy room, parked her chair in front of the parallel bars, and locked the wheels. Joseph stood beside the parallel bars, his arms crossed in front of his chest. “Good morning, Billie. You’re not going to quit on me today, are you?”

  “I’d like to see you make me,” Billie said without breaking eye contact with him.

  “You’re on.” He took a step backward and placed one of his hands on each bar. “Grab the bars.”

  Billie kept her eyes on Joseph as she did what she was told.

  “Now stand up.”

  She pulled on the bars with all her might and pushed her heels into the floor. Her face contorted with the effort and sweat broke out on her brow. Halfway up, her strength gave out and she fell back into the chair, which Laura had kept close behind her.

  Billie’s chest heaved with exhaustion and anger as she made her second and third attempts. Over and over, she failed and fell back into the chair. Joseph stood there, a hand on each bar, leaning forward. He watched he
r intently as Cat stood nearby.

  In the midst of the fourth attempt, Billie was drenched in sweat. Her muscles quivered, and tears ran down her cheeks.

  “Help her,” Cat yelled at Joseph.

  Joseph pointed at her. “I warned you before about interfering. Now either shut up or get out.”

  Billie was pissed. She summoned all her anger and pulled herself to her feet, coming face-to-face with Joseph. “Don’t you ever talk to her like that again. Got it?”

  Joseph grinned. “Congratulations, Billie. You did it.”

  Billie’s knuckles were white from holding on so tightly to the bars. Her face and neck were covered with sweat, and her entire body trembled. She felt Laura’s arms slip under hers as she helped her back into the chair. Billie looked at Cat, who had backed up against the wall in reaction to Joseph’s outburst. Billie’s heart lifted as Cat smiled at her.

  An entire hour had passed during Billie’s attempts to stand. She was exhausted and weak as Laura wheeled her back to her room and helped her into the straight-backed chair by the window. Her body shook from exertion and shock.

  Laura took a blanket from the closet and wrapped it around Billie’s legs. She squeezed one of Billie’s knees. “You did real good this morning. Better than expected.”

  Cat, who had been sitting on the edge of Billie’s bed during this exchange, jumped down and approached Laura. “Laura, why does he antagonize her so?”

  “I agree Joseph’s methods are a little unorthodox, but he does produce results,” Laura said.

  “He makes me so angry,” Cat said, “I just want to slap that smug expression off his face.”

  Laura laughed. “Oh, girl, I know what you mean. Sometimes he even gets to me, but I’ve learned to butt out. Like I said, he gets results. He’s good at what he does.”

  “He won’t be doing it much longer if he attacks Cat again,” Billie said.

  Laura chuckled. “Something tells me Joseph has met his match with you, Billie. Your OT should be here soon. I’ll be back after lunch to help you back to bed. You should take a nap before this afternoon’s session. Okay?”

  “All right. Thanks Laura,” Billie said and Laura left the room.