by Jenny Han
“She does,” I say, annoyed. “She has me.”
Pat’s grin slips away and he gives me a look, one of respect. He holds up his bong. “You want a hit, Mary?”
I shake my head. “Oh, no, thank you,” I say. The guy in the monster mask snorts. I worry for a second he’s laughing at me, because I sounded too polite and straightlaced for Pat’s weed-smoking invitation.
Then I realize he’s just watching the movie, the girl getting chopped in half. I’m about to cover my eyes when I notice how fake it all looks. The blood like ketchup, the guts like spaghetti. I laugh too.
* * *
There wasn’t a haunted maze when I used to live on the island. It started after I moved away. The same entertainment company that puts on the carnival in the summertime runs it. They’ve leased a big field on the rural side of T-Town, where some people still have farms.
“Well, that blows,” Kat says, when a parking attendant waves us away from the entrance. The lot is full. We have to drive about six blocks before we can find an open spot. The maze opens two weeks before Halloween, but according to Kat, most people wait until tonight to go.
Kat and I walk together. There are a ton of people out, either walking toward the maze or heading back to their cars. Absolutely everyone’s in costume. There’s a lot of energy. The closer we get to the maze, the more screaming you hear coming from inside it.
The maze is as big as a football field. They make the whole thing out of hay bales, stacking them ten feet high so you can’t see over the tops. The company set up a few big stadium lights so people won’t trip over each other, but there aren’t enough to light the place up. There’s a PA system that’s playing spooky organ music. We’re not even inside yet and there are already people in scary costumes wandering around trying to freak people out.
I link my arm through Kat’s. She feels strong and solid next to me. “I’m scared!”
Kat looks at me with a surprised smile. “You stick with me, kid,” she says, patting me on my head.
We get in line. You have to sign a waiver to enter the maze, promising you won’t sue if you have a heart attack.
“I wonder what kind of costume Alex is wearing,” Kat says, out of the blue. I shrug my shoulders. “Probably something lame.”
“I hope Lillia’s thing with the kids went okay,” I say.
“I’m sure it was fine. Cho’s as type A as they come. I guarantee she didn’t leave anything to chance.”
“Maybe we’ll see her tonight. Maybe she’ll want to hang out with us. You know, if Rennie’s still being mean to her.”
“Yeah,” Kat says, but she sounds doubtful. I don’t know why. I feel like Lillia’s made a real effort to stay friends with us. Way more than I expected back in September.
“I’m sure she’ll at least say hi,” I say, and knock into her playfully. Then I feel a tap on my shoulder. I spin around and come face-to-face with a cute boy. Well, at least I think he’s cute, based on what I can see through his mummy bandages.
“Hey,” he says to me, “aren’t you in my English class?”
“I don’t think so.”
He rubs his chin and looks at me skeptically, like I might be lying to him. “You sure? I could have sworn that you were.”
I shake my head. “I have Mrs. Dockerty, third period.”
He frowns. “Oh. I’ve got Mr. Frissel.”
“Honest mistake!” I chirp, and turn back around. Kat’s moved a few steps ahead in the line, so I hurry to catch up with her.
Kat cocks her head toward me. “Why didn’t you keep talking to him? Go back and give him your digits!”
I shake my head. “He thought I was someone else.”
Kat looks at me, slack jaw. “He was flirting with you, dummy! That English class garbage was the icebreaker, the opening line to get a convo going. Hello!”
“What?” I turn around and the mummy boy is standing in a circle of his friends, looking at me, but his eyes quickly go to the ground. I spin back to Kat and whisper, “Oh my gosh!”
Kat laughs. “Innocent little Mary. Do you see what I’ve been talking about now? You’ve gotta put yourself out there more. Who knows? You could have a boyfriend by Christmas.”
The thought makes me warm inside. Me? A boyfriend?
“You need to quit with this whole meek routine. This bumbling shy shit. You’re not twelve years old anymore. You’re seventeen!” Her eyes go to my chest. “Look. You’ve got boobs. And guys love boobs!”
“Quit it!” I say, laughing, and wrap my arms around myself.
Kat shakes her head. “I won’t quit it. Own the fact that you’re a smoking hot girl who any guy would want.” I open my mouth to say something like No guys want me!, but Kat shoots me a look, so I keep my mouth shut.
But really. They don’t. At least they never have before.
Or maybe it’s that I’ve never even tried to get a boy to notice me. A boy who wasn’t Reeve Tabatsky.
It takes me until we reach the front of the line to work up the courage to glance over at mummy boy again. He’s still looking at me, and this time he doesn’t play it off like he’s not. He gives me a sweet smile.
I manage to give him one back before I totally lose my nerve.
But it’s something!
There are two huge strobe lights going at the very entrance of the maze, flashing so fast it makes it nearly impossible to see what’s right beyond the first bales of hay. We take a couple of steps inside, to the first big intersection. You can go left or right, or keep heading straight.
Kat grabs my hand. “You’re freezing.” She pulls me along with her to the left. “Now, stick close to me. Suckers are going to jump—”
Right then two ghouls leap from the shadows. I scream and start laughing, while Kat practically leaps into my arms.
“Personal space, asshole!” she screams at the ghouls.
“Are you okay?” I ask her. “Do you want to go back through the entrance?”
She gives me a face like I’m being stupid. “They caught me by surprise, is all. Come on. This shit is going to get tiring real fast. And the sooner we get to the end, the sooner we can hook back up with Ricky and the guys.”
I pat her on the back. “O-kay, Sister Katherine.”
We only take a few steps before I feel someone come up alongside us as if she were part of our group. Kat notices her too, and we both turn and look. This is an older woman, but she’s dressed up like a little girl in a blue dress, white lace-trimmed socks, and black velvet buckle shoes. She’s carrying around a doll covered in fake blood, and she holds it up to us. “My dolly’s sick!” she cries in a weird, whiny voice. “Help my dolly!”
Kat lets out a shriek I didn’t know she was capable of, high and shrill and raw. She drops my hand and takes off running.
“Kat!” I’m laughing so hard. “Kat!”
I push my way in the direction Kat ran off, but it’s hard with all the other people in the maze. I take a left, then a right, and head straight into a wall. I walk backward out, and someone taps me on the shoulder. “Kat?” I say, but it’s just a psychotic farmer wearing bloodstained overalls and carrying a pitchfork. I mean, another one of the workers.
He spins me around, and when I take a step forward, I realize I have zero idea where I’ve come from and where to go next.
“This way, you guys!” a girl’s voice calls out.
It’s not Kat. It’s Lillia.
I stumble in the direction of her voice, but it’s hard to tell exactly where she is, with the music and the other people screaming and laughing.
I take a couple of turns, but I don’t hear Lillia again. It’s dizzying, and the flashing strobe lights are starting to give me a headache. I shout, “Kat? Kat?”
Another ghoul jumps out at me, and this time I scream. He grabs my arm and tries to keep me from getting away from him. I shake him free and quicken my pace down a long maze alley. I need to find Kat. I don’t want to go through this thing alone. It’s definitel
y way scarier when you’re by yourself. And Kat’s probably having a heart attack right now, for all I know.
I take another left and walk for a few feet until I hit a dead-end hay wall. I shake out my hands and try to calm myself down. Am I ever going to get out of here?
Then I turn around and run right into Reeve Tabatsky.
I mean that literally. I run right smack into his chest. The force sends me stumbling backward a step. Reeve’s crutches clatter down on the ground, and he totally loses his balance with his bum leg. Thankfully the maze alley we are in is narrow, and one of the hay walls breaks his fall and keeps him from hitting the ground.
“Shit,” he says.
“I . . . I didn’t see you,” I say.
“Are you okay?”
It takes me by total surprise, Reeve asking me this. My cheeks heat up bright, but I lean down and pick up his crutches for him so he won’t see it.
“Don’t worry about me,” I say, the words tumbling out of my mouth super fast and nervous. I can’t believe I’m finally face-to-face with Reeve, having an actual normal conversation with him. After all these years, here we are. I straighten up and ask him, “How’s your leg?” Reeve doesn’t take the crutches from me, so I lean them against the hay wall for when he’s ready.
He says, “It’s fine,” but I don’t believe him. He looks like he’s in serious pain. I can see it all over his face. His teeth clench as he bends over to check his black soft cast and adjust the Velcro straps.
“Should, um, I get someone to help you?” I take a step back and give him some room. I hope I haven’t messed up any of the progress he’s made in the pool.
“No, don’t,” he says, quiet. Reeve pushes a hand through his hair, composing himself. He says with a groan, “It’s my own fault for coming to this stupid maze anyway.” He reaches for his crutches, slides them under his arms.
I can tell he’s about to walk away from me, but I don’t want him to. I’m not ready for this moment to be over. Not yet. It’s like when we rode the ferry together. I’d wish and wish and wish the ride could last a little bit longer. Even a minute longer.
I reach out and touch his arm. His shirt is so unbelievably soft, and I feel his bicep underneath. It’s big and tight and cut, probably from the weeks he’s spent on crutches. I say, “I’m sorry you got hurt at the dance.” And despite everything Reeve did to me, it feels good to apologize. Because I truly did not mean for him to be hurt so bad that his whole life might be screwed up forever.
He shrugs his shoulders. “Shit happens, you know?”
“Yup,” I say, nodding, because it is true. “Shit happens.” It happens to all of us.
There’s an awkward second, where neither of us knows what to say. Reeve rustles his hand through his hair. “I should go find my friends. Hope you make it out of here alive.” He positions his crutches and goes to take a step forward, but I shift my body so he can’t. It gives me a surge of adrenaline.
“It’s, um, been a long time, huh?” The words get kind of caught up in my throat.
Reeve’s head falls slightly to the side. “Yeah . . .”
The wind picks up and blows my hair around. I tuck as much as I can behind my ears. “I’ve always wondered if you ever thought about what happened.” Reeve lets out an awkward laugh and then blinks a few times. I can’t tell if he’s embarrassed or blindsided. “If you felt bad about what you did.”
And then I wait, because it’s the perfect opening. I’m giving him the best shot to apologize to me, to finally take responsibility for his actions. To make things right between us, once and for all.
Reeve’s eyes narrow in confusion. He’s trying to place me.
Which throws me off. Sure, I’m wearing a Halloween costume, but it’s weird. It took him five seconds to call me Big Easy at the dance. Does he really not recognize me now?
“Calling a girl Big Easy because she’s fat—do you not know what that does to a person?” Reeve’s whole body stiffens, and he stares at me hard, this time with cold eyes. I feel him peeling back the layers I’ve got on. The makeup, the leather pants, the crazy hair, until I’m stripped clean to the bone. I’m shaking. Shaking like a leaf in the wind. “You were such a bully back then. Aren’t you sorry? Even a little bit?”
He wets his lips and growls, “Go fuck yourself.”
I can feel myself start to crumple and I worry my legs might give out. Reeve pushes past me and down the long corridor.
“I’m sorry,” I call after him. I don’t even know why. But I immediately hate myself for saying it. Because those are the words I deserve to hear. Not him. Only I’ll never get an apology from Reeve, because he isn’t sorry.
Not one little bit.
And then I feel it coming. A tidal wave. A tsunami. The surge inside of me. Anger, sadness. Like on homecoming night. I close my eyes, but I don’t see darkness. I see the hay maze lighting up, walls of fire penning in all these people.
Oh God, oh God.
I have to get out of here before I explode.
* * *
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
* * *
KAT
I’VE GOT MY BACK PRESSED up against a wall of hay bales, and the sticks are pricking through my nun habit. It’s a dead-end part of the maze, but I don’t care. I’m hiding so no ghouls or zombies or whatever can get me from behind. Every so often, I crane my neck and peer around the corner and keep my eyes peeled for Mary.
Obviously I’d find her faster if I actually looked for her, but I’m not moving from this spot. Mary can come to me. I didn’t pay thirty dollars to die of a heart attack in this damn maze.
I hope she’s having fun. Kid deserves to have a good time. I’m glad that little doofus in the mummy costume was trying to chat Mary up while we were in line. She could use a boost to her self-esteem, big-time. Sure, I’m no guidance counselor, but Mary needs to realize that she’s not the girl she used to be.
A pack of people creep past the alley where I’m hiding out. A girl in a ballerina costume breaks off from the group and heads toward me, walking cautiously on her tiptoes. She’s got on a pink leotard, pink tutu, pink everything. Of course it’s Lillia.
“Lil,” I say, stepping out of the shadows.
She jumps and screams a horror-movie scream, but she’s smiling, too. Scaredy-cat Lillia loves this stuff—who’d have known? She must think I’m one of the workers, because she’s about to run away, back to her friends. But then I say her name again and she stops cold. It takes her another second to recognize me, I guess because of my costume.
“Kat! Oh my God! Is that you under there?”
“Taketh not the Lord’s name in vain!” I say in a booming voice.
She giggles. “Where’s Mary? She was coming with you, right?”
I nod. “Wait till you see her costume. She looks amazing. I’m talking leather pants amazing.” As I say it, I realize that I wish it were the three of us hanging out together tonight. But I push the thought out of my mind, because it doesn’t make sense to feel sad about something you can’t do shit about. She’s here with her other friends. I quickly change the subject. “Did everything go okay at the elementary school tonight?”
“It was fine. I think the kids had fun. The parents were happy.”
“Cool.” I felt bad, seeing how stressed Lillia was all week. “Hey. You know, I would have come and helped. But you didn’t say anything, so—” Her cheeks get flush, so I back off. “I’m not upset or anything,” I clarify. “I mean . . .” I don’t know what I mean. I’m babbling.
“Don’t worry. It all worked out. I didn’t think to ask you, though. I know it’s not your thing. But thanks for offering to help”—she smirks—“when it’s too late to actually, you know, help.”
I touch a finger to her shoulder and make a sizzle sound. “Nice zinger, Lil. I like how I’m rubbing off on you.”
She looks like she’s about to make another joke at my expense when we hear Reeve say, “Shit!”
His voice
sounds like it’s coming from the other side of the hay wall.
We both roll our eyes, because Reeve’s such a douche, but then there’s Mary’s voice, all tiny and small and Mary-like.
“I . . . I didn’t see you.”
In half a second, Lillia and I both have our ears up to the wall, listening.
Lillia whispers to me, “Mary’s talking to him.”
I whisper back, “Eff talking. Kick him in the nuts!”
That makes Lillia giggle.
We both gasp when we hear Mary say, “Calling a girl Big Easy because she’s fat—do you not know what that does to a person?” Lillia grabs my arm and starts hopping up and down excitedly. I can’t believe it. The kid’s really going for it!
Then we hear Reeve say, “Go fuck yourself.”
Lillia’s hands fly to her mouth. Fucking Reeve Tabatsky. He’s as much of an a-hole as he was before his accident, if not a bigger one.
Lillia and I wait to hear what she’ll say back.
And then Mary says, “I’m sorry.”
Lillia closes her eyes and drops her chin to her chest.
Damn.
We see Mary sprint past our alley.
I go to race after her, and Lillia makes a move like she’s going to come with me, but I shake my head. “No. Stay with your friends. We shouldn’t let anyone see the three of us together!” Only, she doesn’t listen. She runs right alongside me.
“Mary!” We’re both screaming her name, pushing people out of our way. I see her pink-streaked hair a hundred feet or so ahead.
Finally we catch up. Lillia grabs hold of Mary’s shirt. “Mary!”
Mary spins around. She’s crying. She tries to tell us what happened, but she can’t get the words out.
“We heard it. We heard everything.” Lillia gently pushes some of Mary’s hair out of her face. “You look amazing, by the way.”
The compliment doesn’t even register on Mary’s face. It’s blank. Like she has PTSD or something.
I turn her by the shoulders and make her look me in the eye. “What do you need us to do?” I say, quick. “Just tell us.”