by Jenny Han
Elizabeth Zane.
Big EZ.
With a shaking hand, I try to trace my birthday. Thirteen when I . . .
I stumble to my feet and start backing away from the grave, without leaving a single footprint behind in the snow. I spin and run as fast as I can back to my house.
The front door is open. I run inside, up the stairs, to my room.
There aren’t any boxes. None of the clothes I packed away. My dresser is covered in a sheet. My bed has no linens. I step into the bathroom. The shower curtain’s gone. The towels, too. I look down into my bathtub. It’s full of dust, even though I showered right before Mom came.
But I’ve been going to school. I’ve been doing all the normal things a high school girl does. I have friends. I have two friends!
How could they see me if I’m dead?
I go over it in my head. All the people I’ve talked to . . . Kat, Lillia, Aunt Bette. That’s pretty much it.
But wait! Halloween! I talked to other people on Halloween. I kissed a boy on Halloween.
Then I remember what Aunt Bette said to me that night. On Halloween the line between the living and the dead is blurred.
I rock back on my knees. Aunt Bette’s been trying to tell me all along. But I didn’t understand.
And I still don’t.
Have I been here this whole time? The mental hospital, the new house, the years I’ve spent away from here—did I make it all up in my head? Like the bike? My clothes?
Is none of it real?
And the biggest question of all . . . If I’m dead, why didn’t I go to heaven? Or hell? Or just disappear? Why can’t I leave Jar Island?
I squeeze my eyes shut, throw back my head, and scream a scream that doesn’t end.
* * *
CHAPTER SIXTY-SIX
* * *
KAT
IT’S DINNERTIME AND I’M PARKED a half block away from Lillia’s house, chain-smoking with my car windows rolled up tight. The snow hasn’t stopped falling since last night, and my windshield is almost completely blanketed white.
I’ve been waiting an hour for her to come home. I’m not sure where she is. Maybe at Rennie’s mom’s apartment, comforting her. Maybe with Ash, or some of the other girls from the cheerleading squad, holding each other and crying.
My heart hurts bad. Rennie and I were friends for a long time. Even with our break during high school, I know our friendship was deeper and longer and eclipsed anything she had with anyone else.
I can’t even go over to her apartment. It’s not like I have a right. It’s not like anyone would think to check on how I’m dealing, or give me a shoulder to cry on. No one is explaining to me why this happened, what was the cause of the accident, what the fuck we’re all supposed to do now.
I’ve texted Lillia maybe ten times, and she hasn’t written back once. Not one fucking time, when she knows that Rennie was my best friend too.
Maybe she’s still with Reeve.
I don’t feel like I can even go check on Mary until I talk to Lil so she can explain what the hell is going on.
I let my head fall against the windshield and my eyes close, but as soon as they do, the tears come flooding back. This is all fucking crazy. It’s insanity.
I haven’t slept. Not a wink. Just sobbed and smoked, sobbed and smoked on repeat since I saw her Jeep burning in the ravine.
I glance at the dashboard clock. It’s five p.m.
Rennie’s been dead fifteen hours.
Fifteen hours ago. I was the last person to see her alive. I gave her her keys. I let her drive.
I start shaking, shaking and crying, and my head hurts so fucking bad. I stick my hand in my pocket and take the Valium that Pat handed me when I first tried to lie down, after we’d gotten home from the woods. Lord knows where he even got it. I wash it down with a sip of cold gas-station coffee.
* * *
I guess I eventually do nod off, because I don’t know how long has passed before I hear a knock at my window.
Lillia.
I lean across the car and open the passenger-side door. She climbs in. The skin around her eyes is pink and her face looks so pale.
“Sorry I didn’t text you back,” she whispers. “I was with her mom. She . . . she’s in really bad shape.”
I just stare at Lillia, because I don’t know what to say. She starts crying. Quiet, delicate tears.
“Do they know what happened? Why she crashed?”
“I don’t know. The officers aren’t saying yet.”
“Did you know she had pictures of you putting E in Reeve’s drink?”
Lillia pales. “You saw them?”
“Yeah. Rennie showed me after you left. I had to convince her to leave with me and not show everybody at the party. I went back and got them and burned them, but I don’t know if they’re the only copies or what.”
Lillia closes her eyes. “I can’t even think about that right now.”
“Well, you better think about it because if anyone else see those pictures, we’re fucked.” I feel my lip curl. “What the hell happened with you and Reeve last night?”
Her mouth starts opening and closing, but no words come out.
“For fuck’s sake, Lillia!” I shake my head and wrap my hands around the steering wheel. “What are you going to say to Mary?”
“I don’t know, okay!” Lillia shouts, wiping her eyes. “I can’t even think straight right now.”
I rail on. “I hope you don’t think that I’m going to be the one to tell her, do your dirty work for you. That’s on you.”
“Kat, God! Can you just—can you just give it a rest? Rennie’s dead. My oldest friend in the world is dead.”
I slam my hands on the steering wheel and scream my throat raw. “You don’t think I know that! You think you were the only one who cared about her?”
Lillia wipes her tears with the sleeve of her coat. “I can’t believe any of this is happening.” She turns toward me, eyes sad but hopeful. “I mean, this could all be a bad dream. Right?”
* * *
CHAPTER SIXTY-SEVEN
* * *
MARY
I’M OUTSIDE KAT’S CAR, LISTENING to them fight. Fight over who’s going to have to tell me what I already know. That Reeve and Lillia are together now. A couple.
Maybe they’re even in love.
But Kat and Lillia have no idea that I’ve got secrets too. Big, big secrets. Sure, there’s still a lot I need to figure out. What I can do, what I can’t. Why Lillia and Kat could see me when nobody else could. That will come in time, I’m sure. Like Aunt Bette said, I didn’t know what I’m capable of.
I will soon.
I do know this for sure. What happened last night, Rennie dying, was an accident. But next time it won’t be.
I’ve wasted so much time. Trying to make Reeve feel remorse for what he did, trying to guilt him into an apology. But now I understand that there was no point to any of it. He can never give back what he’s taken from me. My family, my friends, my heart, my life. All gone. If he got on his knees and begged me for forgiveness now, it wouldn’t be enough. Not even close.
An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a burn for a burn. A life for a life.
That’s how all this got started. And that’s how it’s going to end.
JENNY HAN and SIOBHAN VIVIAN met in graduate school in New York City and have been inseparable ever since. They share books, pretty dresses, and a love of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. The idea for the Burn for Burn series began over cupcakes, as the best ideas usually do.
JENNY HAN is the New York Times bestselling author of The Summer I Turned Pretty series and the Burn for Burn trilogy. Visit her at dearjennyhan.com.
SIOBHAN VIVIAN is the author of The List, Not That Kind of Girl, Same Difference, A Little Friendly Advice, and the Burn for Burn trilogy. Visit her at siobhanvivian.com.
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An imprint of Simon & Schuster Children’s Publishing Division
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This book is a work of fiction. Any references to historical events, real people, or real places are used fictitiously. Other names, characters, places, and events are products of the author’s imagination, and any resemblance to actual events or places or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.
Copyright © 2013 by Jenny Han and Siobhan Vivian
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Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Han, Jenny.
Fire with fire / Jenny Han and Siobhan Vivian.—First edition.
pages cm.—([Burn for burn ; 2])
Summary: Jar Island teens Lillia, Kat, and Mary’s ongoing revenge plot against Reeve has unexpected consequences.
ISBN 978-1-4424-4078-4 (hardcover)
ISBN 978-1-4424-4080-7 (eBook)
[1. Revenge—Fiction. 2. Friendship—Fiction. 3. High schools—Fiction. 4. Schools—Fiction. 5. Islands—Fiction.] I. Vivian, Siobhan. II. Title.
PZ7.H18944Fir 2013
[Fic]—dc23
2013000541
CONTENTS
Epigraph
Lillia
Kat
Mary
One Week Later
Chapter One Mary
Chapter Two Lillia
Chapter Three Mary
Chapter Four Kat
Chapter Five Lillia
Chapter Six Kat
Chapter Seven Lillia
Chapter Eight Mary
Chapter Nine Lillia
Chapter Ten Mary
Chapter Eleven Lillia
Chapter Twelve Mary
Chapter Thirteen Kat
Chapter Fourteen Lillia
Chapter Fifteen Mary
Chapter Sixteen Lillia
Chapter Seventeen Mary
Chapter Eighteen Kat
Chapter Nineteen Lillia
Chapter Twenty Mary
Chapter Twenty-One Lillia
Chapter Twenty-Two Kat
Chapter Twenty-Three Mary
Chapter Twenty-Four Lillia
Chapter Twenty-Five Kat
Chapter Twenty-Six Lillia
Chapter Twenty-Seven Kat
Chapter Twenty-Eight Lillia
Chapter Twenty-Nine Kat
Chapter Thirty Mary
Chapter Thirty-One Lillia
Chapter Thirty-Two Kat
Chapter Thirty-Three Lillia
Chapter Thirty-Four Mary
Chapter Thirty-Five Lillia
Chapter Thirty-Six Mary
Chapter Thirty-Seven Kat
Chapter Thirty-Eight Mary
Chapter Thirty-Nine Lillia
Chapter Forty Mary
Chapter Forty-One Lillia
Chapter Forty-Two Kat
Chapter Forty-Three Lillia
Chapter Forty-Four Mary
Chapter Forty-Five Kat
Chapter Forty-Six Lillia
Chapter Forty-Seven Kat
Chapter Forty-Eight Lillia
Chapter Forty-Nine Kat
Chapter Fifty Lillia
Chapter Fifty-One Mary
Chapter Fifty-Two Lillia
Chapter Fifty-Three Mary
Chapter Fifty-Four Kat
Chapter Fifty-Five Lillia
Chapter Fifty-Six Kat
Chapter Fifty-Seven Lillia
Chapter Fifty-Eight Mary
Chapter Fifty-Nine Lillia
Chapter Sixty Kat
Chapter Sixty-One Mary
Chapter Sixty-Two Lillia
Chapter Sixty-Three Kat
Chapter Sixty-Four Lillia
Chapter Sixty-Five Mary
Chapter Sixty-Six Kat
Chapter Sixty-Seven Mary
About Jenny Han and Siobhan Vivian