I bit my lip. I wanted to tell him I had a feeling it was the same thing he did to me, but then I worried that what he did to me might be more.
More than I expected. More than I’d hoped. More than I could recover from.
We cleaned up and righted our clothes enough to allow him to pull me into his arms so we could enjoy the dying embers of the fire for a few more minutes before heading back to his apartment.
He brushed my hair back from my face so he could look in my eyes, his expression making my heart seize. “All mine.”
I’d never get tired of hearing those words from his lips, but I had to wonder if he knew the full extent of their truth.
I was all his.
My body.
My book.
And, without question, my heart.
Chapter Seventeen
Sage
“Sage!”
I spun in my seat as Rose came up and hugged me from behind, interrupting Luke’s and my discussion.
“What is it? Is everything okay?” I asked quickly, worried that something was going wrong in the middle of her rehearsal dinner at Luke’s brewery. “Do I need to—”
“Everything’s perfect.” She laughed and assured me. “Can I get a minute with my maid of honor?”
Luke smiled and dipped his head. As he rose, he leaned forward and pressed a kiss to my cheek right next to my ear and whispered, “We’ll talk later.”
I nodded eagerly, knowing he’d been anxious to tell me about Fantasy’s expansion. I hadn’t realized it was so imminent, but he’d taken several calls each day, always disappearing just out of earshot, so he wouldn’t bother me while I worked on the final decorations for Rose’s wedding. And those were only the calls I’d been around him to see.
He’d been a little evasive when I asked what was going on, insisting that he needed to keep it under wraps until everything was certain, but I had a sneaking suspicion it might involve the older warehouse that sat next to the current building we were in; it had a ‘For Sale’ sign out in front of it, and I could’ve sworn that when we got back from Portsmouth, the ‘Sold’ marker had been added to the top.
Rose murmured her thanks and sank into Luke’s seat as soon as he vacated it. We both watched as he went up to the bar to check on his employees and the catering staff who were buzzing around the main room in Fantasy.
Luke and I had been setting up all afternoon, but then I had to leave to go get ready and then head over to my parents’ house for the actual rehearsal since the ceremony was going to be in the apple orchard.
I shivered, recalling with a cold chill those few moments when I had to walk with Sean down the makeshift aisle. To think at one point that had been a dream to me.
“Well that went from superficial to serious pretty quick,” Rose murmured.
I glanced over my shoulder, making sure Luke was well out of earshot over by the bar where he was organizing his bartenders and the servers doing the catering for the dinner.
I faced her and reminded her, “Rose, tonight—this weekend—is about your relationship.” I paused, brushing my hands down the long black skirt of my dress. “Not my… thing… with Luke.”
Rose snorted and flipped her loose braid over her shoulder. “Call it a relationship, Sage, not a thing,” she insisted. “Calling it a thing is like saying you think Harry Potter is… alright.”
I pursed my lips.
“He took you to Portsmouth and then you haven’t slept back at Mom and Dad’s since,” she said and then corrected for emphasis, “All week. You’ve been cock-napped by Hot Luke all week.”
“Rose,” I scolded her, pressing my fingers to my cheeks, confirming that they were flaming.
I held back the truth that I hadn’t slept much, period.
It was hard to sleep when Hot Luke was so good at making me melt.
“Okay fine. Our relationship,” I said with a low voice and a smile I couldn’t stop. Anything was better than her referring to it as a cock-napping.
“Thank you.” She flung her hands together in a prayer gesture. “Now, I can take credit for jump-starting the whole thing.”
I rolled my eyes but laughed. “Of course, you want all the credit.”
She shot me a devious wink, sliding her eyes to Luke and then back to me. “Hey, that still leaves you with all of his co—”
“Rose!” I half squealed, half scolded and then let out a huge sigh. “I’m just trying not to make too big of a deal out of it—or continue to use any kind of rendition of the word ‘cock’ while in the vicinity of other family members,” I pleaded. “It was only supposed to be until the wedding. We haven’t talked about what’s going to happen after tomorrow…”
This week with Luke had been magic—a perfect dream.
Waking up in his arms. Sweet and sexy texts throughout the day. Dinners with my family. Binge-watching the Harry Potter movies. Nights lost in pleasure.
But because I was me, because I was a little too cautious with my heart… and a little too intoxicated with the superhot yet painfully tender way Luke took care of me, I was afraid to ask the hard questions because I was afraid of the answers.
I was afraid because I felt so much after a short period of time… because my heart was exposed when only a few weeks ago, what we had was just for show.
Maybe that did make me weak. Or whiny. Or whatever other kind of derogatory description I could come up with. But right or wrong, it was real.
No one could be strong all the time. No one could be sure in an instant or fearless every second.
At some point or another, we all had something so good it was impossible to not be afraid to lose it.
And goodness was I afraid to lose him.
“Sage…” My sister scooted right up to my side, resting her elbow on the table and propping the side of her head on her hand so she could look at me. “The way he looks at you is loud enough for even me to hear that he’s not letting you go.”
The sweet thought made my heart flutter all over again.
“I know I’m being ridiculous,” I told her. “And I know we will talk about it. I just want to pretend like we don’t have to for a little while longer.”
Like until after tomorrow.
“Oh my god.” My sister stared at me, her eyes growing wider by the second.
“What?” I reached for my cheeks. And then my nose. And then the corners of my mouth. “What is it?” I glanced down and checked my bright orange necklace with a beaded pumpkin in the center and then the front of my dress. “Did I spill something? Is there something on my face?”
A slow smile pulled up the corners of her mouth. “Yeah, there is.” My hands snapped back up to cup my cheeks, about to reach for my phone as a mirror when she added, “Love.”
I froze.
Everything froze.
The room. The music. Heck, the world seemed to stop spinning with the power of that one little word.
I knew it. I’d known it for some time now. But to hear it out loud…
“You love him. You love Luke.”
“Shh!” I shushed her, the spell breaking as my head jerked side to side. “Don’t say it so loud, someone might hear you.”
Rose let out a small squeal and then reached for my tightly clasped hands, her eyes dancing. “This is amazing. You and Luke together. In love.”
My heart fluttered.
I looked for the man in question, but instead, the first set of eyes I found trained on me were Sean’s and my body revolted with a flinch. He sat at the far table with the rest of the groomsmen, sipping some kind of hard liquor from a glass, and watching me with the same kind of sickening focus that he’d had earlier at the house.
I gulped and jerked my head away. “I think you need to be more excited for your own wedding right now.”
“Sage.” She tugged on my hands, looking over her shoulder and then back to me. “And you’re sure you’re okay after earlier?”
She meant after rehearsing with Sean earlier.
“Yeah. He’s just… annoying,” I said tightly.
And that was being generous.
It was as though knowing I’d left the haunted house early with Luke, and then hearing from Rose that I’d moved in with Luke, had sent Sean into this quasi-jealous fit. Not because he really wanted me, but because he didn’t want anyone else to have me.
Especially Luke.
Luke and Sean were like two very different sides to the hot, popular quarterback coin.
And seeing how Luke wanted me, it was as though Sean hated looking like a fool for letting me go.
Except he was a fool. And an ass. And there was no changing that.
“I’m just excited because this means you’ll be around more often,” she declared, capturing my arm and pulling me close for a second before she apologized, seeing Mike motion her over to their table where he sat with his parents.
I gulped, left with thoughts I hadn’t considered.
What if Luke thought this meant I was moving in with him for good? What if that was why he’d made me pack that big bag from my apartment and then promptly unpacked it back at his place while I was in the shower?
Yes, I’d signed the lease for my store space, and yes, he’d encouraged me to do it, but was he thinking I was going to commute there every day for work? Not that an hour commute was a big deal, but still.
Had I been unknowingly Hot-Luke-matized into giving up control over the part of my life I’d worked so hard for?
No. I shuddered, my nerves feeling like they were thrown on ice.
I loved my family, and I loved my hometown… but I wasn’t moving back here. I’d made a life in Portsmouth—I wanted to live in Portsmouth.
I turned my head, searching for Luke.
But his life was here… his business…
Oh, god.
His business was expanding. Here.
“Breathe, Sage,” I muttered to myself, standing so quickly I almost toppled my glass of cider over on the table.
Change of plans. I needed to talk to Luke now.
I thought it would be better to go into the wedding with one last day of blissful hopefulness as to where this was going; I was wrong.
I needed to know.
And I needed him to know that I loved him.
I looked around but when I couldn’t find Luke, I rushed up to the bar, gripping the edge and asked Kenny, one of the brewery’s employees, “Have you seen Luke?”
He replied while grabbing two more beer glasses, “I think he went to take a call, so maybe out on the back deck?”
I nodded. Even though it was only immediate family and the bridal party, the exuberant conversations echoed through the open space like an amphitheater.
My heels clicked rapidly on the stone floor as I headed to the far side of the main room where the back door of the brewery was. It led to the outdoor patio where they normally had tables set up and a stone pizza oven cooking up pies.
The door was unlocked and there were lights on. He must be out here.
The Trex deck was decorated for the season just like the rest of town. Hay bales and squashes were displayed in the corners, and on either side of the door, there were two jack-o’-lanterns made by two of Rose’s students. Her whole class had carved pumpkins for her wedding and the rest would be used to line the aisle tomorrow morning.
“Luke?” I called, adjusting my flower-adorned headband that shifted from my quickened pace.
I thought I heard voices, so I went to the middle of the deck and looked around before realizing it must’ve been coming from somewhere else.
Maybe he was in his office.
I turned and my hand smacked against my chest, letting out a yelp of surprise.
“Sean.” I gasped, shaking my head and trying to coax my heart back down into my chest from where it had leaped into my throat. “What are you doing?”
“We need to talk, muffin.” He folded his arms, standing in front of the door like a guard preventing me from going back inside.
“We have nothing to talk about,” I said firmly. “And I need to go back inside. I’m sure my sister is looking for me.”
He snorted and shook his head. “Your sister? Or your little fuck buddy?”
I flinched, hating how this man tried to twist and taint everything good about me and my life.
“What do you want, Sean?” I pretended to be bored. Annoyed with his little tantrum. And I hoped it hid the seed of fear that sprouted higher and higher with each of his snarls.
His arms swung out, giving me a stare like it was obvious. “I told you, Sage. I want my little treat.” He took a few slightly shuffled steps toward me.
Great. He was an alcohol-fueled ass.
“And I think if Chambers is getting some, then I definitely deserve a taste. After all, I fucking dated you for how fucking long? You should be so fucking thankful to me, otherwise no one in their goddamn right mind would—”
His head snapped to the side with the force of my smack, the sound echoing like a gunshot around us.
I pressed my hand to my lips, instantly regretting my outburst, but I couldn’t take another second of his words.
I didn’t deserve to.
Maybe this was my own turning point—my own knock on the door moment. For long enough, how Sean betrayed me prevented me from opening any letter—any possibility of love or a serious relationship. Until Luke delivered himself into my hands.
Charmingly. Possessively. Tenderly.
Deep down, I knew the kind of man he was—I knew the kind of future that waited for me if I just let myself open it.
And I wanted to.
For the first time since high school, I wanted to open that future with Luke. And if that meant I had to be my own Hagrid—my own bodyguard to stop this jerk from messing with me once more, then I would do it.
For Luke and what we could have.
And also for myself.
Sean lifted his hand to his jaw, rubbing it with a low laugh that made my skin crawl.
“You fat fucking cunt,” he said savagely, his hand shooting out and grabbing me by the throat.
I tried to gasp in shock, but I couldn’t because he was practically choking me. I wheezed in air, reaching out and clawing at his arm and chest, trying to get him to release me.
But nothing fazed him.
He jerked me to the side, making me trip over my heels before slamming me against the wall of the building. Pain lanced through me but my cry stuck at the roadblock around my throat.
He brought his head close to mine. I struggled to focus because I was getting just enough oxygen to stay conscious.
“You think he’s going to be any different?” he sneered, his voice like acid rain on my skin. “He’s not.”
Tears pricked in the corners of my eyes. I tried to grab for him again but my arms grew weak. All my focus was steered toward the small stream of air his grip allowed in, and anytime I tried to focus on something else—like trying to push or scratch him—the noose tightened.
“Why’d you have to make this so difficult, Sage?” His breath burned my cheek. “We could’ve just had a little something on the side like old times. Instead, you decided to take up with that fucker like he sees you differently.” His nostrils flared, and his face moved so close to mine I wanted to vomit. “He doesn’t. When he looks at you, he sees what I see.”
With a sick laugh, he hooked the fingers of his other hand in my necklace and yanked. The beads flung out across the deck, scattering
like hardened tears.
“He sees a woman made to fuck and forget.”
It wasn’t sadness or self-preservation that gave me the strength I needed, it was anger.
My hands grappled beside me, feeling the wall of the building and then realizing we were close to the door.
“Which is exactly what I’m going to do.”
My fingers found what they were looking for, clasping around the ribbed stalk of the pumpkin with all my strength before I heaved the jack-o’-lantern at the side of Sean’s head, pummeling him with the hollowed pumpkin.
Pumpkin guts splattered out and the grip around my throat released as Sean stumbled to the side. I expected the blow to free me. I hadn’t expected the broken pumpkin to get wedged around his head like some kind of Halloween helmet.
I gasped for air while Sean stumbled around off balance with a pumpkin stuck to his head.
“Fuck!” he roared and dropped to his knees just as the door to the brewery opened.
Luke and Rose came through it, stopping short when they saw us.
It took Luke no time at all to know what happened—to look at Sean and then see the panic on my tear-stricken face.
He was in front of me in an instant. “Are you okay?”
I nodded, opening my mouth to answer him but instantly changing my mind when my throat protested. I squeezed my eyes shut, holding my neck until the burn subsided.
Luke peeled my fingers from my skin, and Sean’s grip must’ve left bruises because a dark expression draped his face before he released me and turned to the other man.
“Luke—” I could only manage his name, but there was nothing that would stop him from making this right—from giving Sean exactly what he deserved.
Rose grabbed my arms and pulled me to her, holding me to her like I was a little girl. I shook against her, my body trembling from the stress it had been put through. I looked at my hands, dirtied with pumpkin goo and vibrating. I knew I was crying, too, because I felt her dress turn wet under my cheek.
“You’re okay, Sage. I’ve got you,” she soothed me while we both watched Luke pick Sean up by his shirt with one hand, and then use his other to start punching him. “Let’s go inside. Let’s get you out of here.”
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