Jessie came up beside her and whispered, “What do you think of him, Lucy?”
“He’s my dead sister’s fiancé,” Lucy hissed before she could stop herself. What more could she say? It was a fact. He might be handsome and nice, but he was off limits for more reasons than one. She knew her friends had their minds on getting Amy and her matched up with someone. And, Olive had set a strange pattern with Blake deciding to become Amish. If Olive had chosen someone already within their community, she was sure Claire wouldn’t have fallen for Donovan. She and her friends were concerned over how that would turn out. “And he’s an Englischer. Look at his clothes; he can’t be coming back to the community.”
“Jah, you’re right. It seems it’s the handsome ones who always leave.” Jessie sighed.
Lucy smiled at Jessie’s words; she always saw the peculiar side of things.
* * *
Joshua sat down in the front row, and then everyone took their seats and waited for Amy’s vadder, the deacon, who was about to deliver one of the two sermons. The large living room had been stripped of furniture and it had been replaced with rows of wooden benches, which faced the coffin.
The deacon spoke about how life is a fleeting moment and our real life is with Gott in heaven. Twenty-five minutes later, he sat down and the bishop took his place to deliver another sermon. The bishop explained how life was a cycle and everything had a season; there was a time to live and a time to die.
This was different from other funerals. Normally there was the viewing and then the burial, then everyone went back to the family’s house for a meal. Were these sermons for a reason? Maybe to encourage Joshua back to the fold?
At every funeral since Grace had died, Lucy’s thoughts turned to her. Her only comfort was the knowledge she’d see Grace again someday.
Lucy knew what the bishop said was true in theory, but why was it Grace’s time to die when she was so young? Why did Mrs. Hershberger have to die before she saw her son just one more time? Why was Gott’s timing seldom in line with everyone else’s?
Shortly after Grace’s death, Lucy had been compelled to ask the bishop if he had answers to her questions about Gott’s will and Gott’s timing. The bishop’s only answer was that His mind is higher than our minds. There was no way we could fathom Gott’s reasoning, he had told her.
The bishop closed with a lengthy prayer, and Joshua’s mother’s coffin was closed. Four men came forward to carry Mrs. Hershberger to the long horse-drawn funeral wagon. Abel Esch, Abraham Miller, Tony Graber and Jebediah Yoder were the four men chosen to carry the coffin and fill in the grave at the cemetery.
Lucy stood and watched the tall men dressed in black suits easily lift the coffin onto their shoulders. The men held the coffin at each end to guide it through the narrow doorway. Once they were outside, they stood two at each side and heaved the coffin up on their shoulders once again.
After a few moments, everyone filed outside the haus and into their buggies to follow the wagon to the graveyard.
Lucy stood outside the house and watched the goings on. She stepped back and leaned on the side of the house. She had been to many funerals, but this one reminded her of Grace even more because Joshua was there.
“Are you all right, Lucy?”
Lucy looked up to see Olive.
“Jah, I’m okay.” Lucy didn’t tell Olive this particular funeral was bringing sad memories.
“Well, come on. We have to leave now if we’re to follow the wagon.” Olive linked arms with Lucy and walked with her to Elijah’s waiting buggy.
Once Lucy was in the buggy, she looked around for Joshua and couldn’t see him anywhere.
He must be in one of the front buggies. Surely, he wouldn’t have driven his car. Nee, he would not have a car at his mudder’s funeral.
She turned and saw a car that must have been his, parked behind Mr. and Mrs. Esch’s house.
Elijah’s buggy was at the end of the procession and Lucy estimated there would’ve been more than forty buggies in front of them. When they arrived at the cemetery, Olive and Lucy went on ahead while Elijah secured the horse.
The same four men pulled the coffin out of the wagon and carried it to the freshly dug grave. When everyone had gathered around in a circle, the bishop read out a hymn. When the bishop finished, the coffin was lowered into the ground by ropes. Joshua stepped forward and threw a white lily onto his mother’s coffin before the dirt was shoveled in.
Lucy slipped away to visit her sister’s grave. It was the custom of her community not to mark the graves with names, but a plan was kept of who was buried and where. Lucy knew exactly the grave where her sister Grace lay. Even though years had past, Lucy was still irritated Grace never got to live out her life.
As she stood at the foot of the grave, she whispered, “I miss you, Grace.”
Home life hadn't been the same, ever since she’d gone. Seldom a day went by without Grace’s name being mentioned. Lucy knew it wasn’t her parents’ fault, but everything she did or said was compared with Grace.
Nearly every day Lucy heard how she looked nothing like Grace. Grace had been tall with fair hair, and Lucy’s hair was darker and she hadn't grown as tall as her sister. Lucy knew she didn’t measure up in her parents’ view. She often wondered whether they would rather she'd been the one who died rather than Grace. Why hadn’t Gott taken her home? Sometimes, she felt guilty she was left alive and Grace was gone.
Murmurings from the crowd behind her told Lucy everyone was making their way back to their buggies. Lucy took a moment to say a few more words to Grace and when she turned around, she came face to face with Joshua. His face drained of color when his eyes fell on Grace’s grave.
He stepped forward. “Are you all right, Lucy?”
Lucy turned from him and sniffed, and then looked up at him. “I’m all right. What about you?”
He smiled and nodded. “Death is a part of life, as the bishop says. I’ve gotten used to it. First my vadder, then Grace, now Mamm.” He looked down at Grace’s plot of dirt and took a deep breath, letting it out as a long sigh.
“I’m sorry about your mudder.”
“Denke, Lucy.”
Joshua looked over his shoulder at the crowd of people leaving.
“Are you coming, Lucy?” Elijah called out from a distance.
Lucy waved to tell him she was coming.
“I’ll walk you over.” As they ambled to Elijah’s buggy, Joshua asked, “Will you be at the Esch’s haus for the meal?”
“I will.”
Joshua said, “Mamm’s place wasn’t in good enough order to have a lot of people over there. I need to get to work and fix it up.”
“You’ll be staying on then?”
Mrs. Esch interrupted Lucy, “There you are Joshua. The bishop’s looking for you.”
He turned to Lucy. “I’ll talk to you soon, Lucy.”
Lucy hurried to Olive and Elijah not wanting to keep them waiting.
“Is Joshua okay?” Olive asked when Lucy climbed into their buggy.
“Jah, he’s good.”
On the way to the Esch’s house, Lucy’s mind wandered to the last days of Grace’s life. She’d been sweating and sick with fever for days and was bed-ridden. Then the vomiting began, and she suffered from delirium; things she said had made no sense. The doctor visited every day, and he sent for the ambulance when he saw she was worse. By the time the ambulance arrived, she was already gone.
Lucy had sat in the living room when the paramedics took Grace past her. They had fully covered her body in a white sheet. And just like that, Grace left this world and left Lucy without a sister and her parents without their favorite child.
Joshua had visited Grace every day, but that day he’d been held up. He arrived just as the ambulance pulled away from the house. He walked into the house and from the look on his face he’d guessed what had happened and Lucy’s father confirmed it. Three days later, Grace’s body was in a pine box in their home for the funeral,
just like Mrs. Hershberger’s body had been at her brother’s house today.
Lucy had not cried until the day of Grace’s funeral. Lucy remembered Grace lying there dressed in white, her face expressionless and cold. Grace had always found every reason to laugh and have fun, but the Grace in the coffin seemed like someone else. Lucy had to turn away. Never again did she look at the dead at any of the viewings since then. Lucy learned what heartache was after her big sister had been taken away. Even though Grace was many years older than she, they had been close and losing Grace had left a black gaping hole in her heart.
When they arrived back at the Esch’s haus, three tables were spread with food. Most every family had brought food to contribute to the meal. There were raisin pies, cold cuts of sliced meats, varieties of cheeses and breads. The meals after the funerals were kept easy and simple.
Every time Lucy looked over at Joshua, he was speaking with someone different. Joshua caught her looking at him, smiled and nodded. Lucy smiled back then looked away. If she hadn’t known he’d been so in love with Grace, she would’ve thought he was attracted to her. She certainly felt that way about him. Or maybe there was just a bond there because they’d both loved Grace.
When the crowd had thinned, Lucy and Olive went to say goodbye to Joshua.
“I’m sorry my parents couldn’t be here, Joshua. They would’ve wanted to be here and they would’ve loved to have seen you.” Lucy wanted to emphasize the feelings of both her parents and herself.
“I know they would, Lucy. I’ll likely see them when they get back.”
“So, you’re staying on?” Olive asked.
Lucy suppressed a smile when her friend asked the very thing she was anxious to know.
“I reckon I’ll stay for a time at least,” Joshua said.
Olive and Lucy said their goodbyes and went to find Elijah.
It was late at night and Lucy did not look forward to going back to a dark, empty house. Her mind was numb while she listened to the clip-clop of Elijah’s horse heading to her house.
“Funerals are always good places to see people you haven’t seen in a long time,” Elijah said, as he drew into the road leading toward Lucy’s house.
“Like Joshua?” Olive asked.
“Jah, he’s been missed.”
“You can let me out here, denke, Elijah,” Lucy said when they didn’t have far to go.
“Nee, Lucy, it’s too dark. I’ll take you to the door.”
“Do you want me to come in with you?” Olive asked.
“Nee, I’ve got the lamp near the door. I’ll put it on quickly.”
“You’re sure you won’t come back and stay with us, just for tonight?”
“Denke, Olive, but I’m determined to enjoy my peace and quiet.”
Lucy stepped out of the buggy, glad the day was drawing to a close.
“We’ll wait until you get a light on,” Elijah called out.
Lucy opened her door and reached for the light. She struck a match and lit the wick then held it up in the doorway to show them she was okay.
After Elijah turned the buggy around and started back up the road, Lucy closed the door and put the main living room light on. Had her parents got word about the death of Mrs. Hershberger? They were very close to her and after Joshua left the community they had made sure his mudder had everything she needed. Lucy had often gone with her mother on her visits to Mrs. Hershberger.
She wandered into the kitchen and placed the kettle on the stove for a cup of peppermint tea. Lucy had eaten far too much throughout the day and peppermint tea always soothed her tummy.
Tomorrow was Saturday and her employer, Julie, had let her swap days to attend the funeral, so she had to work tomorrow in place of today.
When the kettle whistled, she took it off the stove and poured the hot water over the muslin pouch filled with peppermint leaves. As it steeped, she watched the steam rise into swirls above the teacup. She hoped to see Joshua again soon. She did find him attractive, but she was sure he still saw her as an eleven-year-old child. Lucy stirred her tea.
Chapter 16
The next day, Lucy was up at six o’clock feeding the animals and doing all the chores before riding her bike to Julie’s house. Her mudder normally did the morning chores and could take her time to do it, but Lucy had to do everything quickly to make sure it got done
As always, Julie's children—Liam and his sister Tia—ran out to meet her when she arrived. Five-year-old Tia was quiet and liked to color and would sit with crayons and paper all day long if she could. Eight-year-old Liam loved to play in the dirt with his toy trucks.
Julie had planned to go out that day, but the children greeted Lucy with the news their mother was sick. She had come down with a bad cold.
Lucy got the children busy and then crept into Julie’s room. “Can I get you anything?”
“No thanks. I was up earlier giving the children breakfast and had something to eat. I felt dizzy and came back to bed. I’m so glad you’re here today.”
“I’ll check back on you in a while.”
Julie’s eyes flickered and closed. “Thanks.”
Just as she was about to close Julie’s door, Julie asked, “Oh, Lucy, how was the funeral?”
Lucy poked her head around the doorway. “Much the same as any funeral, I suppose.”
“Was the lady’s son there?”
“Yes, he was.” Lucy noticed her eyes had closed again. “I’ll tell you all about it later when you’re feeling better.” Lucy closed the door.
The children were unusually quiet, so Lucy crept up the hallway and peeped around the kitchen door to see what they were doing. Liam was making himself a piece of toast and Tia was coloring quietly at the table. Lucy stepped into the room. “Liam, are you allowed to make toast on your own?”
Liam looked up from digging a knife into the butter. “Yes, Mom lets me.”
Lucy stepped forward and took the knife out of his hands. “Your mother said you’ve already had breakfast.”
He looked up at her with large brown eyes. “I’m hungry again.”
“Me too,” Tia whined.
“All right, I’ll make you both some toast.”
“Can I have strawberry jam on mine?” Liam asked.
Tia ran to stand beside Liam. “Mine too?”
Lucy made the children toast and while they ate it, she put on a load of laundry. Lucy kept the children entertained in between washing clothes and other cleaning duties and kept checking back on Julie.
Lucy had been at Julie’s house for longer than usual when she looked into Julie’s bedroom again. “How are you feeling now?”
“A little better thanks.”
“I can stay longer and give the children dinner.”
“Could you? That would be great.”
Lucy nodded. “I’ll bring you some too. Let me know if you need anything else.”
“Thanks, Lucy, I don’t know what I’d do without you.”
After Lucy gave everyone dinner and put the children to bed, she was ready to go home and it was pitch black outside.
“I’ll go now, Julie, unless you want something?”
“No. Thanks, Lucy. I’ll pay for a taxi for you to get home. Take money out of the jar in the kitchen.”
“I’ve got my bike here. It’s not far and there’s rarely any traffic this time of night.”
“No, Lucy, it’s too late, and it’s too dark out.”
“Don’t concern yourself with me, Julie.” Lucy stepped closer to Julie. “Do you want me to stay the night? I could if you want. There’s no one at home.”
“No, I’m feeling a bit better. I just needed some sleep and having you here made that possible. I’ll be better tomorrow, I’m sure of it. Thanks for doing everything.”
“You're welcome. Goodnight then, and I'll lock the door behind me so you don’t have to get out of bed.”
After she checked on the two sleeping children, Lucy closed the front door. She did not like riding her
bike at night because she found it hard to see once the streetlights ended and the Amish settlement began. Her father had hooked up a light on the bike for her, but it didn’t work very well. She would pull off the road if she saw a car approach.
When she was only five minutes along the darker section of road, she saw the headlights of a car behind her. She moved to the side of the road and was about to get off the road completely except the car speeded up before she had a chance.
She turned to see how close the car was and headlights blinded her. The car swerved and clipped her bicycle in the rear. Lucy was tipped off her bike and put her hands out in front of her to save her head from hitting the gravel.
As she lay on the side of the road, she heard the offending car screech to a halt. She pushed herself up with her hands and pain shot up her right arm. She heard someone yelling and a fuzzy figure ran toward her.
“Are you all right?” Two large hands lifted her to her feet.
“Ow! My arm and my leg! I think they’re broken.”
“Is it you, Lucy?”
In the darkness, she stared up into his face. She could barely make out who it was, but she knew the voice. “Joshua?”
“Oh, no, my little Lucy. What have I done?” He held her in his arms. “Are you all right?” he asked again. “Are you hurt anywhere else?”
“Nee, I don’t think so.”
“I’m so sorry. I can’t believe I’ve done this.”
She was in too much pain to respond.
He released her and said, “I’ll take you to the hospital.”
She clung to him because she could put no weight on the one leg. “Nee, it’ll be okay. I don’t like hospitals or doctors.”
“You’re going to the hospital.” He scooped her up into his arms.
The swift motion caused Lucy’s heartbeats to vibrate harshly inside her head. “Joshua Hershberger, put me down.” She would’ve yelled, but she was too shaken.
He walked a few paces then placed her on her feet. She yelped in pain when her left leg touched the ground. The only option she had was to lean against him for balance.
The Amish Maid's Sweetheart Page 11