by L. A. Sable
Someone clears their throat behind me. “Frank, I hoped you’d be here. I wanted to thank you again for helping me recover my position at Black Lake.”
Asher’s father lets me go and I turn to see Liam Cardill standing behind me wearing a sardonic smile beneath his bright red mask. It would take more than a mask to keep me from recognizing him.
“Cardill,” Frank says, his voice clipped. “I wasn’t sure if you’d make it now that you have so many responsibilities as a member of the staff.”
“I am still alumni, after all,” Liam points out.
Frank Bellamy shifts his stance, gaze now solidly on the other man. “You wouldn’t be back here if you weren’t.”
“Mr. Bellamy helped you get your job back?” I ask, my gaze pinging between them. It definitely feels like there is a whole other conversation going on that I don’t know anything about. “That’s nice.”
“Once a Diamond, always a Diamond. He spoke to Dean Felton on my behalf.” Liam’s says casually. “I thought I mentioned that to you. The alumni network is still very helpful, even when you’re years out from graduation.”
Something simmers between the two men that I don’t understand, but I’m sure that I don’t like it one bit. “It was very nice to meet you, Mr. Bellamy. I should probably get back to mingling.”
I flee before either of them can raise a word in protest.
When I rush back towards the bar, hands wrap around my arms and pull me into an alcove near the door. I look up to see Asher glaring down at me.
“I’ve been looking for you,” he says, dropping his hands as if the touch of my skin burned him. “Where have you been?”
“Talking to your father. Who you didn’t even bother to tell me would be here.”
His eyes widen. “I didn’t know. Where is he?”
I gesture in the general direction of the grotto. “Back there somewhere. Last I saw, he was talking to Mr. Cardill. Did your father tell you he helped Liam get his job back?”
“We don’t talk that often.” Asher’s mouth tightens. “I’m about to head out. You ready to go?”
“Isn’t a little early to be leaving? People will notice.”
“Pretty sure I don’t care what they notice, so I’m going. You coming, or not?”
I let him take my hand because, frankly, I’m desperate to get the hell out of here. In the back of my mind, I recognize that we should probably let the other guys know that we’re going but I don’t want to wait around long enough to find them. I’ve seen enough of what it means to be Diamond within the walls of Black Lake to know that it does nothing to teach people how to be better humans, which doesn’t bode well for whatever the alumni will want from us.
There’s no such thing as a free lunch.
Asher leads me out the door and up the darkened stairs, navigating them as easily as if he’s wearing night vision goggles but is probably just the ease of long practice. Bellamy Hall is deserted this late at night and our footsteps echo eerily off of the marble floors and high ceilings.
Outside, cool air chills my skin and makes me shiver.
Heavy fabric falls over my shoulders and I’m surprised when I look down to see that Asher has draped his tuxedo jacket over me without me having to ask for it. It smells like him and I fight the urge wrap it more closely around myself.
He walks me all the way to my dorm room, but to my surprise doesn’t ask to come inside. For a long moment, he stares down at me as a full moon hangs overhead, casting his face in an almost unearthly glow.
Leaning forward, he kisses me hard enough to bruise but pulls away before I have a chance to respond. His mouth just barely brushes my ear as he whispers.
“Stay away from my father.”
I watching him stride away, mind racing as I stare at his rapidly retreating back. It’s impossible not to be a little mad at myself for wishing he would stay.
My hand fumbles with the lock on the door as I hear the sound of a branch snapping under a heavy foot. When I turn back, I watch as Lukas emerges from the shadows with a murderous look on his face. A mask dangles from the fingers of one hand while the other is clenched into a tight fist.
“What the hell is going on between you and Asher?”
Chapter 7
I grab Lukas and pull him into my room because this is not a conversation that you have outside in the middle of the night. He continues to glare down at me but doesn’t resist as I push him toward the bed. He sinks down onto it as I lock the door behind us. Hopefully, the walls are thick enough that the girl in the room next to me doesn’t hear whatever happens next.
It isn’t necessary to ask if he saw the brief kiss between Asher and I, because there isn’t anything else for him to be so visibly angry about. Just leaving the party without him wouldn’t be enough to illicit this sort of response.
“I’m guessing you haven’t talked with your brother recently.” My conversation with Kai is still very fresh in my mind. “He and I had the exact same conversation that I’m about to have with you.”
“Just because we’re twins doesn’t make us the same person, you know.” Lukas glares at me with more anger than I’ve ever seen in him before, combined with a decent measure of hurt. “Talking to him isn’t the same thing as talking to me.”
“I never thought it was. Really, I mean that.” During all that time watching him coiled around Chloe like they were snakes, I never pegged Lukas for the sensitive one. “I only meant that I know you guys talk, all of you I mean, not just you and Kai. I can’t ever really be sure what you say when I’m not around.”
“I don’t talk about you when you’re not around and I never will.” Lukas’s voice is deadly serious. He watches me like I just kicked a puppy down a stairwell. “I only want to know why you’d choose Asher Bellamy of all people, especially considering the way he’s treated you.”
“I didn’t choose Asher.” I take a step forward but stop when his eyes narrow. “I didn’t choose anyone, that’s the point.”
Lukas raises an eyebrow, expression skeptical. “Are you telling me that I didn’t see the two of you making out a few minutes ago?”
“That wasn’t anything close to making out. You and Chloe sucked more face than that during class when you were dating.” I cross my arms over my chest and lean back against the desk, recognizing that I have to keep the distance between us if I want him to continue this conversation. “And I’m almost certainly going to do it again. Make out with Asher, I mean.”
Lukas doesn’t make any movement, but his hands clench into fists where they rest on his knees. “If this is your way of letting a guy down easy, then you really suck at it.”
“That’s the point, I’m not letting you down.” It’s been so difficult to accept what I want just within my own mind that I don’t trust myself to reliably put it into words. But I don’t have much choice, if I don’t explain myself then he’ll walk. “Each of you guys have something that I don’t want to lose and friendship isn’t enough for me. I know that’s selfish, but it is what it is.” I watch his face as my words sink in, searching for any hint as to what his response might be. “I want all of you.”
His blank expression gives absolutely nothing away. “I’m not the kind of guy that’s into sharing.”
My response is simple. “And I’m not the kind of girl that’s into choosing.”
“So how does this work exactly? You want to be one girl with four boyfriends?”
“I have no idea how it works.” Sensing the weakening in him, I take a step closer to him and then another. Eventually, I get close enough that our bodies are within inches of touching as I stand between his spread legs. “I figured out what I really want about five seconds ago, after fantasizing about it for months. I’m still working out the logistics.”
Our gazes meet as I look up into his silver eyes, so clear that they’re like pools of water that are practically colorless. “What exactly are you saying?”
My hands come up to grip the arms over his t
uxedo jacket, feeling his muscles clench under the fabric. “I’m saying that you don’t have to leave, not if you don’t want to.”
Our first kiss is so hesitant that I’m sure if I can even use that word for it. Unlike his brother, Lukas doesn’t wear his insecurities on his sleeve so that the only way to cover them is with bluster. Instead, he hides his gooey center from the world and only reveals it once you’ve broken through the outer shell.
But a moment later, our mouths meet in a way that’s charged with electricity and heat. He kisses me like there isn’t anything in the world that he would rather be doing and I’m the only thing in the entire universe that exists for him in this moment.
His hands tease at my waist, gripping tighter as our kiss deepens. He takes his time, exploring my mouth with sure strokes of his tongue before pulling away slightly so that my lips chase after his. After a moment that also could have been an hour, he gently pushes me away with his hands still at my waist.
“I don’t want to just get in your pants,” he murmurs, voice husky as he studies my face. None of the other guys seem to pay as much attention as Lukas does, as if he finds everything about me fascinating. “I dated the same girl for like five years, jumping from bed to bed isn’t really my thing.”
Another difference between the twins. Until I showed up, Kai definitely had a reputation for being a serious man-whore. The very first conversation of his I ever overheard was him talking about screwing Maisie on his family’s yacht.
No, the similarities between them stop at the surface despite how identical they seem at first glance. As much as I used to wish that a hole would open up in the earth beneath Chloe’s feet and swallow her up, anyone could see that Lukas had been devoted to making the relationship with her work. She may have taken advantage of his innate desire to be the white knight, but that only makes him seem stronger for trying to make it work as long as he did.
Lukas is the kind of guy who actually still believes in commitment, no matter how much the relationship might struggle. It’s almost refreshing when I think about how mature that makes him compared to all the other guys.
“What do you want, then?” I ask, genuinely curious. “To date me?”
“You make it sound silly when you say it like that,” he grumbles. “But yeah, sex is easy and cheap. I don’t just want that. I want everything else, too.”
I mull that over for a minute, imagining myself doing something silly like a picnic in the park with Lukas Greenfield-Walton. “Let’s say we did go on a date. What would we do? And please don’t tell me you’d take me out on the yacht, because I don’t even want to know where that thing has been.”
“Yeah, no. Kai let’s anyone with a nice ass on that thing and the whole idea of it is just romantically bankrupt. Like, come be girl #227 that I’ve taken for a ride.” Lukas just shakes his head with a rueful grin. “You deserve something with moonlight, candles and a guy with a violin playing romantic music.”
It’s a reminder I’ve never actually been on a real date, or at least nothing like what he’s describing. My only real boyfriend before I came to Black Lake seemed pretty content with hanging out at my apartment and making out after my mom went to bed. We’d both been broke enough that it seemed silly to expect anything more than that.
As if a picnic in the park is only for the rich.
The truth is probably closer to him not being particularly interested in being out with me in public.
“Embrace the cliche,” I tell Lukas, forcing my thoughts back to the present. “Some things are classic for a reason.”
“You’re going to have to give me a little time to think about it if you want originality.” Lukas reaches up and strokes his fingers gently down my cheek, so softly that it inexplicably makes me want to cry. “It’s late and I have to get back, but we’re definitely putting a pin in this.”
It definitely isn’t a pin I want him putting in this. Shocked, I watch him slip past me and head for the door. “Wait, you’re not asking me out right now?”
“I told you, I need a little time to think of something suitably creative. I’d hate for you to be disappointed.” The brief smile that touches his face makes it clear that he knows that he’s torturing me and is definitely getting off on it. “You’re just going to have to wait and see what happens next.”
“That is so cruel,” I tell him, meaning it. “And what makes you think I’m just going to wait around for you?”
He winks at before turns to open the door. “You’ll wait.”
Damn right, I will. With a sigh, I flop back down on the bed and stare up at the ceiling. It’s selfish to want them all to myself, but each of the guys brings something wholly unique to the table and I can’t imagine giving any one of them up. If that makes me selfish then so be it.
I don’t care what happens next, but I refuse to feel bad about getting what I want.
Lukas makes more of a point of spending time with me between classes and at meals, even though he hasn’t made the move yet that he promised me would happen eventually. But he seems to enjoy just acting like a boyfriend more than any of the others. Holding my hand as we walk down the path between buildings or sitting with me at lunch even when he doesn’t feel like eating.
Kai and Jayden have been avoiding me for the first few days. I don’t know if they just need time to mull things over, or if we’re done. I’m trying not to think about it too hard and just give them space.
We have our inevitable run-in with Chloe a few days after we start regularly sitting together at lunch.
And he makes a point of taking the chair next to me even though we’re sitting alone at a table that’s meant for eight people. He pulls his chair close and leans over my shoulder to read the menu instead of picking up his own.
A snide voice interrupts the peaceful scene. “So is this officially a thing now?”
I don’t bother to turn around and continue staring down at the hand-lettered menu even though I already know what I want to order. “Lukas, did you hear something?”
It’s a bitchy move, but pity won’t get me anywhere right now.
But Lukas is a nicer person than I am, for whatever that means about me. He turns in his chair to face Chloe, expression perfectly neutral. “What’s up?”
Her gaze bores into my back, hot enough to burn, but I make a point of not turning around to actually look at her. I don’t want to give her even the satisfaction of seeing my expression. And even more than that, I don’t want to slip and give anything away.
“Did you block my number, or something?” she asks Lukas. “Every time I call, it goes straight to voicemail.”
“I’m not sure,” he answers with a careless shrug, looking down at his phone like it hasn’t been working perfectly until now. “Is something going on?”
Chloe pursed her lips and blew out a hard breath. “I just thought we should talk things through before I leave.”
“You’re leaving?” I turn around to look at her even though I promised myself I wouldn’t.
“I’m transferring to a different school, probably by next week.” Her tone makes it sound like a personal choice, but really it’s an acknowledgement of defeat. She can’t handle the reality of her new social status. Given the choice of fight or flight, Chloe is giving up and running away.
Up close, Chloe looks even worse than she does when I pass her in the halls. Makeup gathers in the frown lines around her lips, making it clear that she forgot to apply primer before layering on the foundation. She was likely too focused on trying to cover up the darkened circles under her eyes to pay attention to the rest of her face. It makes me wonder if she has to drag herself out of bed in the morning with barely enough time to make herself look presentable.
For a moment, I almost feel sorry for her. It’s one thing to spend your life on the bottom, but it’s something else to fly high and then come plummeting back to earth. She’s still recovering from the impact.
We have the attention of the entire dining hall, ob
vious from the hushed quiet around us that has replaced the normally loud conversation. When I look around, most of the faces are openly curious and some of them are more than that, anticipation builds as everyone waits to see Chloe Devlin get whatever they think is coming to her.
No one is going to come to her defense, not now that she’s a social pariah.
“Where are you going?” I ask, curiosity getting the better of me.
“None of your business,” she responds tightly, turning back to Lukas. “If there’s anything you want to tell me or that you want me to tell you, now’s the time to do it. Maybe in private.”
“I think everything that needs to be said already has been.” Lukas’s tone isn’t unkind, but it has an air of finality that should be obvious to anyone listening.
And I have to wonder if he’s steeling himself against her on purpose, worried that if the two of them go off together that she’ll be able to convince him that up is down and betrayal is just another form of love.
“You can go if you want,” I murmur to Lukas, even though it’s the last thing that I want him to do. “I’m fine here.”
“There’s no need to go anywhere.” Lukas turns away and picks up the menu in front of him, making a point of staring at it like it’s the most fascinating thing on earth. “Good luck at the new school, Chloe.”
Despite the light tone, his words are delivered with the sort of finality that represents nails in a coffin. Everyone watching can plainly see that he is absolutely done with her, to the point that once she’s out of sight Chloe Devlin will no longer exist in his world at all.
Anyone else would have slunk away with their tail between their legs, but that simply isn’t the way that Chloe is made. She continues to stand there in silence, glaring at the back of Lukas’s head like she’s silently wishing it would explode off his neck.
I’m surprised when she turns to me. There isn’t so much anger on her face as there is a resignation that goes down to the bone. “Don’t get too comfortable, charity case. You wanted to be me, so take a good look at where that ends up.”