Escape to Giddywell Grange

by Kim Nash

  Suddenly I realised something really important. I could feel myself grinning and my heart felt full. Which meant that I was happy. What I was doing now was so simple but it was absolutely filling my heart with joy. I’d put thoughts of Jamie to one side for now. Like Grace’s mum said, I now felt sure that it would sort itself and worrying about it constantly wasn’t helping my state of mind at all.

  When Beth was in hospital and she had asked me what made me happy, at that time, I’d had no idea. But now I felt like I was really coming into my own.

  Once more, it made me realise that it was the simple things in life that made me happy, like being surrounded by stunning countryside views, enjoying the warm sun on my body and watching squirrels chasing each other, scampering up and down the tree trunks, Baxter barking his head off at them in the hope that he might catch one, not realising that they were way too fast for him. It was watching him having fun, and seeing the other people in my life enjoying themselves that brought me joy. Working at doggy daycare was wonderful. And I was loving spending small pockets of time here and there on the allotment too. I was enjoying my life.

  Chatting with Grace today had really helped me to find some clarity in my life. It was time to stop stressing and let life take its course. There was no need to rush, to find another job in the corporate world for a while until I was really sure that was what I wanted to do. My redundancy money would see me through for a bit and the doggy daycare wages helped too.

  For the first time in a very long time I felt at peace.

  * * *

  After tramping around the countryside for a good hour and a half, we headed home to the barn. The fresh air must have worn us out as Baxter curled up beside me on the sofa and we both had a little snooze.

  When I woke, I decided that I couldn’t sit lazing around for the rest of the day, so grabbed my shopping list from the noticeboard on the side of the fridge and decided to take off to the retail park. There were some bits and pieces I needed to get and I wanted some new pictures to go on the walls. The wall art I had brought from the flat wasn’t right for here and I was looking forward to making it even more homely. I left some treats for Baxter and patted him on the head, telling him I wouldn’t be too long. He curled up in his basket and looked sad, which made me feel really guilty. He had a real gift for making me feel bad when I went out without him. Those big brown eyes were so sad at times.

  Wandering around the aisles of the big hardware store, looking for something to hang pictures with, I banged into a shopping trolley. A smile greeted me and I grinned back as I realised who my trolley sparring partner was.

  ‘Hi Edward, nice to see you. How are you?’

  ‘Hello my dear. I’m great thanks, how about you? How’s your day been?’

  ‘Well, it’s been ok, so far. I was at work this morning, then we went for a big walk in the forest, then had a little snooze and I thought I’d better make an effort to get some stuff for my new home.’

  ‘Ah that’s good to hear. Have you managed to get what you wanted?’

  ‘I’ve bought some lovely pictures and need some things to hang them with now, but I’m at a bit of a loss, to be honest. I’ve always been the type to just bang a nail in a wall and hang a picture precariously, and move it around until it looks straight enough, but I’m told that they need to be done properly because the walls are so old. All suggestions most welcome.’ I laughed.

  ‘Now this is an area I do know about. I’m a little bit obsessive about things like this, so I can definitely point you in the right direction. I’m presuming you have a small hammer in your tool box? And a spirit level, obviously?’

  I looked at him blankly and then laughed. ‘Erm… Tool box? What’s one of those?’

  ‘Oh goodness me, Madison.’ He shook his head, grinning at me, dumped his trolley and linked his arm in mine. ‘Come on. We need to start right at the beginning, don’t we?’

  Edward and I wandered around the store, chattering away comfortably to each other. He was so easy to pass the time of day with and he advised me on the best things to get to start myself off with a small toolbox and with hanging hooks and wire, and told me exactly what to do to put my pictures up.

  ‘You know, if you’re struggling, I could always pop over with your mum one day and help you.’

  ‘Oh that’s so kind of you, Edward. I’ll see how I get on, and if I’m struggling, I’ll put an emergency call out to you. I’ll bake you a cake to say thank you.’

  ‘Ooh, I’ll do anything for a Victoria sponge these days.’ He patted his belly gently. ‘Although I probably shouldn’t.’

  I grinned at him. A month ago, I hadn’t baked a cake for years, and now apparently I felt confident offering my culinary efforts as a thank-you. How times had changed.

  We walked out to the car park together and he helped me to load my shopping into the car.

  ‘How lovely to bump into you, my dear. I do hope to see you soon and remember that offer. I’ll do anything for cake!’ He winked and kissed my cheek as he walked back towards his car.

  As I drove back to the barn, I thought about how well matched he and my mum were and I hoped so much that this was going to work out for them, and be something really special. She certainly deserved some love in her life and he was perfect for her. I really liked him and hoped that after everything that had happened with my father – and with Mum choosing to wait until someone really exceptional came into her life – Edward was everything that he appeared to be.

  Chapter Seventeen

  After playing it cool for a few days, I now found myself on a Tuesday evening, after a busy day at Growlers, sitting across a table from Geoff from Faith and Co, and his wife Libby, next to Jamie, who was looking deliciously dapper this evening in a dark suit and a black open-necked shirt, and who smelled divine. He had booked a table in the same restaurant we went to last week, on the outskirts of Birmingham and I saw Lou, the waitress from the other evening behind the bar. Jamie had arranged for a car to pick me up from home; I’d given in and told him where I was living but as he was sending a car rather than coming to pick me up himself, I didn’t see it as a problem.

  It was actually really nice to see Geoff; he and I had always got on like a house on fire and after lots of general chit chat he asked me my opinion about how working with a PR agency could help him to get more exposure. I’d had a couple of huge glasses of Pinot Grigio by this stage and the drink must have loosened my tongue and my brain and I came out with a ton of PR and marketing ideas. Once I started, the ideas wouldn’t stop coming and Jamie seemed delighted and had even been making notes on a napkin.

  ‘I bet you’ve missed all this brainstorming, haven’t you Madison? You’re so good at it! Do you know, Jamie; you should be offering her a job with your company. Celine was a fool to let her go.’

  ‘I’d take her on tomorrow if she’d consider it, but I don’t think she’s in the right place at the moment. I’d love to be working alongside her. We’d make an awesome team both at work and at home. Maybe one day soon she’ll consider that.’ He took my hand and intertwined his fingers with mine. It was a little embarrassing to be honest, so I pulled my hand away and lifted my wine glass.

  My mind started working overtime and I wondered whether this was the real reason that he’d got back in touch with me. If he offered me a job, then I’d be able to stop thinking twice every time I spent any money. I had what was left of my redundancy money after I’d bought the necessities I needed, but I’d put that in a savings account, not knowing how long I was going to be out of work for and was being particularly frugal at every opportunity. But was he doing it because he loved me, like he said, or because he needed me in his business and was trying to butter me up?

  I suddenly sobered up, and became a little guarded with what I was saying. My intuition was telling me something here; I just needed to work out what.

  I excused myself to go to the ladies’, and to have a moment to myself to think. I was trying to work out whether
he would stoop this low. When I came out, Lou was standing waiting for me.

  ‘I hate to tell you this, and I’m only telling you because my ex husband was a serial cheater, but your ex has just slipped me his card and told me to give him a call if I’m ever at a loose end. You seem like a really nice lady and I hate to see people being taken advantage of. I really hope you don’t mind that I’ve told you.’

  ‘Bloody bastard! I should have known. What do I do now?’

  ‘Why don’t you wait here a little bit, then go back and tell him you’ve been sick and have to go? You could say you’ve eaten something dodgy. Come back in here tomorrow and have a coffee with me if you like and we can have a chat and see how we can pay him back. I could be a honey trap for you.’ She laughed but I thought that it might not be such a crazy idea after all.

  When I got back to the table, Jamie couldn’t have been more attentive and I found it hard to believe what Lou had told me. Perhaps she wasn’t the lovely lady that I thought she was and was just one of those people who caused trouble, and just wanted him for herself, so I stayed until the end of the meal and avoided making eye contact with Lou for the rest of the evening. She must have been completely wrong about him.

  Geoff was quizzing me towards the end of the evening, asking how much I missed my old job, and how much it would take for someone to poach me back into that old world. Whilst I was loving working at Growlers, I knew I couldn’t stay forever, as Beth would soon be on the mend.

  ‘Yes, it’s about time you stopped fannying around at that daft doggy daycare and on your little community projects and started doing something worthwhile, darling. We need to get you a proper job again, back in the real world. We could get you booked back into that hairdressers and beauty parlour and get you looking like yourself again, get some of that glamour back.’ Jamie laughed and Geoff joined in.

  ‘How does £50k a year and a company Jag sound to you, Madison? Something to get you thinking, maybe?’ Geoff passed me his card and it certainly did sound appealing. ‘Make sure you call me if you like the sound of that deal. Ok, that’s enough work talk for tonight folks, let me tell you about the fabulous holiday to Bali that we’re going on next week.’

  The rest of the evening was lovely and the meal and wine had made me feel mellow, so when Jamie called up his driver and asked him to drop me off first, I didn’t even think about the fact that he’d be coming in the car to the farm. I didn’t make eye contact with Lou as we left. Jamie put his arm around me in the back of the car and I snuggled into him. We had always been a perfect fit and it felt so right to be back in his arms. I must have dozed off, because the driver coughed and brought me back to the present, as we pulled up outside the Grange.

  Jamie walked me to the front door. ‘Shall I tell the driver to come back later, or maybe even tomorrow?’ He hid his question with a giggle.

  Above his head, the stars looked like a net of fairy lights and above the farmhouse, shone the brightest star in the sky. We always said that the brightest star was Aunty Jen keeping watch over her family and I still believed it now. At the front of the farmhouse was a duck pond and not long after Aunty Jen had passed away, Uncle Tom had bought a bench and placed it next to the pond. It was where Uncle Tom said he could go and chat to Aunty Jen when he needed to feel close to her and when he missed her most. It made me think of that lovely lady Grace who I’d met on my walk in the forest and her mum.

  I shivered as I had the feeling that I was being watched. My eye was drawn to that upstairs window, where once again, I saw a shadow step back from the curtains, but it was definitely there. Was it Alex again?

  ‘I’m tired Jamie, so I’m going to say goodnight.’

  ‘Oh babe. My poor wounded heart.’

  I swallowed down the words that I wanted to say. It was my heart that had been wounded by him and it was still very delicate and I was treating it with kid gloves.

  ‘Goodnight Jamie, thank you for a lovely evening. See you soon.’ I leaned forward to kiss his cheek, but he moved his head and before I knew it, his soft lips touched mine. I melted into his arms, and as he kissed me, his tongue flicked across my lips, which I kept tightly closed. I wasn’t quite ready for that.

  ‘I can’t tell you how much I’ve missed you, Maddy; it feels so right to be with you again. Please tell me that you’ll consider us getting back together. I want us to be a couple again. I want that more than anything and I hope you do to.’ His hands wound their way into my hair and began to stroke my neck. I leaned into his hand, that familiar touch that he knew I loved. ‘I could stay with you tonight. We don’t have to do anything. I could just hold you.’ That old chestnut; I’d definitely heard that before.

  My eyes were drawn to the curtains in that upstairs window which swiftly shut, and brought me back to my senses.

  ‘Goodnight Jamie.’ It took all the willpower in the world to walk through my front door that night and not look back.

  * * *

  Being greeted at the door by Baxter that night I think was one of the best things in the world. He was so uncomplicated, adorable and fussy. He loved me for who I was. He didn’t care about anything apart from me. When I headed up to bed, he was right by my side, even sitting at the bathroom door while I went to the loo and brushed my teeth. He seemed to sense that I needed some calm in my life right now and when I got under the duvet, he snuggled right into me and I was soon hearing sweet little doggy snores.

  * * *

  It seemed like there was only Russell and me at work the following morning. Uncle Tom and Alex were nowhere to be seen and we were rushed off our feet with viewings as it was getting to the end of the summer holidays and people were booking last minute holidays and wanted to check out where they were leaving their precious furry friends. Just before midday, Uncle Tom came over with two steaming mugs of coffee for us and told us to take a breather.

  ‘So sorry to leave you in the lurch this morning, guys. Had to drop Alex off at the airport. Not sure why, but he decided to book a flight back to America late last night and he left this morning. Something must have rattled his cage but he wouldn’t say what. He must have had a call from Sophie or something last night.’

  Alex leaving made me feel incredibly sad. I loved being around him. Even now I’d got my head round the fact that he’d never be mine, I still loved being in his company. Bloody Sophie didn’t realise how lucky she was.

  * * *

  When my phone pinged two days later with a text from Jamie asking if I’d like to go out for dinner again soon. I knew that I needed cheering up, and that he may as well be the one to do it. I knew Alex would never be mine but it didn’t stop me missing him being around.

  I was in two minds about another night out with Jamie. Up until recently, it had been a while since I’d been wined and dined at posh restaurants like we used to visit all the time and even though I didn’t think I was missing that old life, it was nice to be spoiled when we went out recently. Yet there was also a little niggle in the back of my mind about what Lou said to me at the restaurant. Would I ever be able to trust Jamie again? I suppose there was really only one way to find out.

  * * *

  Flicking through the channels on the TV there wasn’t a fat lot that I fancied watching, so I snuggled up on the sofa with a book. I really had become a big bookworm since my visit to the library and had become Amazon’s biggest customer of late. Even the local delivery guy knew me by my first name now and found it highly amusing when he delivered yet another book-shaped parcel. Two seconds later, I felt a warm, furry body press itself into mine and Baxter had climbed onto the settee commando style without me even noticing and had snuggled up against me. He couldn’t have got closer if he tried. Stroking his head, we settled down and within seconds he was snoring gently. He seemed quite content. The next time I looked round at him, he was lying upside down with his tongue hanging out and his dangly bits on display for all the world to see. I rubbed his tummy and I’m sure he smiled at me. He really was a de
light and I could see that we were going to be the best of friends. When it came to bedtime, he looked at me sadly as I left him in the kitchen, telling him to be a good boy and go to sleep. I woke to whining and padded downstairs in my slippers and dressing gown to see if he was ok. Letting him out for a wee seemed to do the trick but before I could turn the key in the lock afterwards, he’d shot up the stairs and had plonked himself on the corner of the bed by the time I got up there. ‘You are a funny little thing, aren’t you?’ I said to him as I stroked his head and I’m sure he winked at me. We both settled down to sleep and the next thing I knew it was eight o’clock the following morning and I’d slept longer than I’d slept for weeks. Good job it was Saturday.

  A text came in from Jamie asking if he could come over as he had a proposition for me and it couldn’t wait until we met for dinner. Mmmm! This really got me wondering what on earth he wanted to talk to me about that he couldn’t have brought up at dinner. I was still mulling over Geoff’s job offer too. Although I realised he was being deliberately vague so I would agree to see him to find out what he meant, I was intrigued, despite myself. I told him that I could be free at twelve thirty, once the dogs were all settled for a lunchtime nap.

  Jamie pulled up into the yard in his perfectly polished dark green Aston Martin DB9, and I stood at the door and waited for him. As he walked towards me, he was looking suave, in smart jeans and a blazer, clean-shaven and as handsome as ever. Baxter tried to jump up at him as he came in and he turned his nose up and shoved him away. I understood that he probably didn’t want dog hairs all over his nice clothes and explained that I was just looking after him for a friend when Jamie questioned whether I’d been stupid enough to get a dog. I’m not sure why I’d slipped back into my old ways of making him hear what he wanted to hear, instead of just admitting the truth.