by Piper Rayne
“For once, and from now on, I want the truth,” I add, still waiting.
Holding eye contact, Colton starts to move his lips.
But it’s not in the way I expect. Instead of opening them up, parting them to tell me how he feels, he shows me. His lips get closer and closer to mine, his eyes never straying from mine for even a second.
He might still be scared shitless, but I won’t know unless he admits it.
And then he does, in a way, when he stops just before brushing his mouth up against mine. We aren’t touching, but we’re sharing the same air. We’re so close, if I took in a deep breath—versus the quick and shallow ones that’re about to make me dizzy—I’d easily close the tiny bit of distance, the barely existent space between us.
“I’d rather risk it all for you. Everything. I’d rather chance losing every single thing in my life if it meant I could have you the way I want. The way I crave. I’d risk it all. Any day. Any price. Over and over again. No matter what,” Colton says.
And I inhale his words, tasting them on the tip of my tongue, feeling the grit of his emotion on my lips.
So I don’t think anymore.
I don’t waste any time.
I do what feels right, and I crash into him. Closing the distance, my lips move against his, frantic.
And then we’re kissing.
I’m kissing my best friend.
I’m kissing Colton.
And if I’d have known how good of a kisser he is, I might have done this a long time ago.
11
Because, fuck me, Colton is an amazing kisser.
Until now all I’ve gotten from him were chaste pecks on the side of the mouth, on the forehead, on the top of the head. But this.
Ohmygod.
This is so much different.
This is…this is everything a kiss should be, as my lips part and Colton doesn’t hesistate at the invitation. His tongue finds mine. It’s a slow movement, worshiping. He licks my bottom lip, and then nibbles it afterward.
I’m scared to move my hands, to make any sort of sound—though, it’s hard as hell to keep the sigh inside of me. There’s still a part of me that’s worrying if I move too fast, or do the wrong thing, that this will end abruptly, before I’m ready.
And the way he’s running his teeth along my lip, the way his tongue is caressing my tongue, my teeth, I’m not sure I’ll ever be ready for this to end.
Leaning into him, trying to get closer, a moan finally comes from me, filling him up. He smiles against my mouth, and all anxiety about bursting the bubble of whatever magic is happening right now disappears.
Getting up on his knees, Colton tips my head back as he kisses me from above. Both of his hands move to the headboard, on either side of my head. I think I hear a creek, just a little sound, from the pressure he’s putting on the solid wood behind me as he grips it.
Sharing this space, this air, this moment, it’s turning me to something molten, like I’m melting and reforming into something altogether different than before.
The room around us starts to heat up as Colton moves one of his hands to the back of my neck.
There’s a delicious pressure, his nails digging into my skin. The pads of his fingers feel like they’re on fire where they touch my flushed neck. He could melt into me there, fold his hand into my spine and fuse himself to me right here.
“I’m not going anywhere,” I whisper after pulling away to breathe him in. It should be to catch my breath instead. But I’ll have time for that later.
A groan escapes from Colton just before he yanks me back to him, pulling me by the grip he still has on my neck. It’s forceful, but deliciously so. And without thinking about it first, I arch up into him in response.
I want more of that—the rough, the heat, the deep, aching need.
I want more of him. Which should shock the fuck out of me.
But there’s no time for that. Not as Colton moves his other hand from the headboard to the sensitive spot at the bottom of my ribs. Tipping my ear down to my own shoulder, unable to hold it up for a second longer, I suck in a sharp breath.
His fingers move a fraction higher, one rib at a time. The slow pressure, the feeling of his fingers moving over the fabric of my shirt, over my skin, starts to fill my senses.
There’s too much to feel, and I’m on overload.
But in the best way.
His name sits on the tip of my tongue as I watch through lidded eyes while he licks his lips. I don’t ever want to stop looking at him, watching what he’s doing with me, to me, but eventually I have to blink.
And when I do, his lips find a spot on my neck, just under the edge of my jaw. He starts slowly, almost too slowly, as he kisses and licks my warm skin. Then when he runs his bottom teeth against my jaw, something inside of me breaks loose.
With one hand on my neck, like he won’t ever let me go, with his fingers creeping higher and higher up my torso but killing me with their slowness, with his lips and his tongue on my skin—Colton undoes me.
And when the damn breaks there’s more than a waterfall.
A sound halfway between a moan, a groan, and a growl comes from me as I maneuver to get the higher ground, making him tip his head back to keep contact with my skin. My hands find his shoulders and shove him down to sitting.
And then I climb onto his lap, straddling him.
“I want you,” I say with my eyes closed tight.
But even if I’m not looking when I say it, the words get the reaction I want.
Both of Colton’s strong hands move to the back of my head, his thumbs near my temples and his pinkies on my neck. He holds me steady, until he’s yanking my forward so we can come crashing together again like a wave upon the next in a turbulent sea.
And that’s what it feels like. One crashing emotion, one overwhelming sensation stacking on top of another before I have any time to analyze the last.
Overwhelming. But amazing.
My hips start a rhythm of their own, rocking forward and back across his lap. Sitting atop him like this, the friction and pressure it’s all up to me. The power, the control—is delicious.
Tipping my head back, I put all of my balance and weight on Colton’s hands. He holds me up as I grind against him, breathing heavily up toward the ceiling.
My head rushes, the blood pumping through my ears in waves. Everything starts to spin around me until the only thing that’s steady is Colton. Colton beneath me. Colton’s arms surrounding me. Colton keeping me from flying up and away forever.
He’s hard against me, as into every moment as I am. But after more building and building, it starts to feel like these sensations could pile on top of each other forever and never allow for release. So I lean forward again, wanting something of him inside me.
The time for soft and sweet has passed, if it was even here at all to begin with. When I move forward again, my nails dig into Colton’s shoulders. Hard.
My hands clench over and over as I scratch down his back just before pushing him all the way onto his back on the bed. And my lips find his with determination. I lick them with the tip of my tongue. It’s not long before he’s taking the lead, allowing me to relinquish control.
“You’re everything,” Colton says against my ear right before nibbling the bottom of my lobe. “My everything,” he murmurs.
“Fuck me,” I beg him.
If I have to wait any longer, I might explode.
Sitting up, I rip my shirt off over my head. The moment my skin is exposed, it starts to prickle. He’s seen most of me naked before, glimpses here and there. But never with purpose. Never with intention. He’s never seen me like this, not on top of him and begging for more of him.
“Perfect,” Colton says as he grabs me by my sides to pull me back down.
And then my nipple is in his mouth, his tongue caressing it in circles before he starts to suck. The pressure, the suction, it’s delicious. I cry out, rocking against him again, this time in circles.
But there’s still too much clothing on.
“I don’t want anything between us,” I beg. I beg him to get closer, to go deeper.
I had no idea Colton was so strong, but he sure as hell shows me when, in one move, he lifts me up and flips me over, switching our position in just a moment. With him on top of me now, I arch my hips up and it takes him no time to understand.
His fingers could be leaving scorch marks along my skin, and maybe they are, because I burn where he’s touched as he pulls my shorts down. Then he does the same as I did, ripping his shirt off and throwing it somewhere. Who cares where.
Then all that’s between us are his sweatpants. The sweatpants that look so fucking good slung low on his hips. The sweatpants I knew made him look tempting, but I ignored.
I ignored so much.
As I look at him now, up on his knees over me, I have no fucking idea how I ignored this for so long. But I don’t have time to think about it as those sweatpants come off.
I reach for him, ready to guide him into me, ready for us to connect finally. But Colton pulls back just a fraction.
“Are you sure?” he asks me.
It’s quiet, and so unsure, that just those three little words almost have me crying—the emotion in them, the uncertainty, the worry, it’s too much.
“I need you” is all I say.
It’s not eloquent, and I don’t know if it’s what he was looking for. Because there’s another moment of hesitance. Something flicks across his face too quickly for me to get a read on, and then it’s gone.
But just when I’m about to worry he leans over and comes back with a condom. It takes him exactly no time to open it and get it on, my breath getting shallower as I wait.
“Ready?” he asks, hovering over me finally.
Instead of nodding or saying anything at all, my hands find his cock.
Colton’s eyes close when my fingers surround him. I’d like to spend more time focusing on this, on him, but the need in me is getting frantic. So after only a couple strokes I’m leading him to where we both want him to be.
For just a moment, I wonder if we’re going to fit together. Then every fear I’ve ever had flies away as Colton pushes inside of me.
And I thought I was hot before, flushed and already sweating. But this is a whole new kind of heat as Colton fills me up. He’s like the sun shining inside me, and I can see his cheeks getting pinker too as he’s wrapped up in me.
We fit together better than I ever thought possible.
And it’s fucking good as he moves in and out of me.
The pace is slow at first, like he wants to make sure that this moment stretches out, lasts as long as possible. But before long I can’t keep myself from rocking up to meet him, taking control of our speed and making it faster.
Harder.
Pushing him deeper and deeper inside me as I pull on his back, crush him against all of me. The friction of his chest against mine, my hips digging into his, it rubs me in all the right places.
Then, when I had been holding onto him to get closer, to stay with me in rhythm and position, suddenly a shift breaks me. I start to grip his back, his shoulders, anything of him that I can grab to keep myself from falling to pieces.
Somehow, he holds me together while he’s splitting me apart, and my teeth find his shoulder, right where it meets his neck. And I bite down to keep from crying out. But I don’t get my teeth around him before a quiet, “Colton,” slips from my lips first.
And then I’m coming. I’m spiraling simultaneously upward and inside out at the same time. The world darkens around me, and all I hear is our heavy breathing in sync.
He follows me, only half a moment behind.
And we rock together, moaning for each other, as we finish at almost the same time.
12
The sun is way too fucking bright in Hawaii.
I swear, it’s a whole different sun than the one that shines back home, in Minneapolis. Because this one is coming through the curtains to pierce my eyes through my lids.
Ready to yell at Colton across the room to figure it out and get those curtains closed better, I shift. And that’s when everything comes back to me.
There’s a twisting in my stomach, right behind my navel. But it’s the good kind. The kind that sends wings fluttering, and my heart picks up the pace.
Because my legs are tangled in with his.
Colton’s.
I’m still in his bed, not my own.
And we’re still wrapped up in each other, the blankets half on and half off. I’m sweating with his skin pressed against mine, but for once I don’t mind.
Actually, it feels…
This is new. I don’t normally like sleeping next to anyone. Sleeping with them is one thing—since that has pretty much nothing to do with actual sleeping. But the whole snuggling together, overlapping, snoring in each other’s ears. It’s never been my favorite.
But last night—the few hours that we actually were unconscious—I don’t think I’ve ever slept better. Or deeper.
Maybe I should have just tried sleeping next to Colton; it’s better than a sleeping pill. That makes me smile, but I try not to laugh and wake him up.
Then clenching, trying to resist, also makes me realize I really need to pee.
So, as carefully as I can, I untangle myself from him. It’s hard to twist and pull without waking him up, but eventually I do. And I can’t wipe the stupid smile off my face all the way to the bathroom.
Not even when I look in the mirror. Goofy and lopsided, with my hair standing up everywhere, those damn butterflies start up again. And no matter how hard I try to keep my heartrate at a normal speed, it keeps ramping up.
Stop it, you idiot.
I splash some water on my face, cleaning off the sweat and smeared mascara. Next, I brush my teeth. Not that I ever cared about morning breath near Colton before, but then again, I wasn’t kissing him before.
That brings back flashes—my toothbrush pausing mid-swipe, toothpaste foaming at the corners of my mouth—of last night. Of Colton’s lips against mine, parting to break that barrier, to delve deeper. Get closer.
Colton’s hands touching places he never did before. Not with me.
And when my eyes find their reflection in the mirror, the smile that’s been stuck on my face finally waivers just a little. Not from regret.
Hell no. Last night was fucking amazing.
But…there is some worry, bordering on panic. Hesitation. Because of what I could lose.
I mean, I have my rules for a reason. It’s a funny story everyone tells about my high school boyfriend. But that shit was painful. I lost everything in one swoop – my guy, half of my friends, and the person I trusted most. It wasn’t just the grocery store I avoided. It was anything that reminded me of us, of him.
Spitting the toothpaste out, I shake my head after. There’s no sense in getting worked up before I have any reason to. So I swallow it all down, bury the worry.
My feet carry me out of the bathroom and back to Colton before I can get any more tied in knots.
And when my feet hit carpet, my eyes find him in bed, still asleep.
I’ve seen Colton sleep before, but this is different. He looks so peaceful, I almost change my mind about waking him up.
But the little throb down below, my pussy warming and on the verge of getting wet again, tells me I can see him this way again some other time.
Tiptoeing over to the bed, I stay as quiet as possible. And I’m gentle when I set my knees up on the edge. Colton stirs, but he doesn’t move. His eyes stay closed, in the soft way that shows he genuinely still in dreamland.
Even still, I wait a couple moments before I move again.
And when I do, it’s slow.
He’s not awake to appreciate the building of the moment, but I am. And the way my thighs graze against each other has me biting my lower lip to keep silent.
One of his legs is still under the covers, but the rest of
him is exposed. And after a moment of admiration, I crawl to my destination, starting with his smooth chest. My lips find his skin, and it’s like coming back to somewhere special.
I press my lips against him, softly and quickly, moving lower with each kiss.
Around the time I reach his belly button, Colton starts to stir. But he’s not quite awake yet. A little sound comes from his throat, his mouth staying closed as he moans in his sleep.
Skipping the rest of his stomach I move right to my destination. With my hands I gently start massaging his thighs. And with my tongue I lick the tip of his dick. It’s slow, my fingers matching the pace on his legs.
He stirs more then.
And I lick him again.
My fingers go from the top of his legs to the more sensitive insides.
And again, my tongue moves to caress his other head. This time it’s a longer lick, swirling in a circle back to where I started.
“Holy fuck,” Colton groans, sounding like he’s slept a thousand years.
I don’t think I could keep the smile from my face even if I were offered a million bucks. Through my lashes I look up to where Colton’s blinking awake, worship in his eyes.
When I wink, he squeaks like I’ve squeezed the breath from him, and throws his head back down against his pillow again.
And like he did with my nipples last night I pull him into my mouth. At first, I just use my tongue to caress. But after a moment I add a little pressure, some sucking.
“What a way to wake up,” Colton says, one arm over his face as he starts to tense up. “Wait,” he says then, sitting up.
His hands move to my cheeks, his fingers tangling in my messy-as-hell sex hair. Nuzzling into his palm, I close my eyes close as I breath in. The room smells like us, like our coming together, like our contentment. I know I shouldn’t get used to it, but for this moment, I soak it up.
I soak Colton up.
He keeps one hand on me, moving to the back of my head where he tangles his fingers up more in my hair and grips the back of my skull. It’s the perfect combination of tender and firm, desire and restraint. And with his other hand he reaches into the end table again, and pulls out a condom.