by Sandi Lynn
“That’s probably Ami and Lamar,” he said as he got up from the couch and went to the door.
“Where is she?” I heard Ami’s voice.
“On the couch.”
When she saw me, she stopped dead in her tracks and stared at me for a moment with a sadness across her face. The tears in my eyes started to fall and she knew. She ran over and wrapped her arms around me and held me tight. We both cried and then went into the bedroom and shut the door.
Grant
“I feel so bad for her,” Lamar said.
“Me too. You want a beer?” I asked as I opened the refrigerator.
“Sure. Hey there, pretty kitty,” he spoke as he bent down and picked Duchess up. “Wow. She’s a beauty. How are you handling this? You don’t really like cats.”
“We had a talk last night. I set some boundaries.”
“And she’s listening to you?” His brow arched.
“No.” I laughed as I handed him his beer. “The cat is obsessed with me. She won’t leave me alone.”
“And how is she any different than all the other women who have been in your life?”
“Very funny.”
“How are you holding up?”
“It’s tough. Even though the baby wasn’t mine, I still feel it. You know?”
“It’s because you’re in love with Bella and you see what it’s done to her. Don’t even try denying it.”
“I’m not denying it. I never fell out of love with her and honestly, it scares the fuck out of me. Taking care of her and comforting her just came naturally. I don’t care about anything else in this world except her, and I would do anything to take her pain away and make her happy again. This isn’t me, Lamar.”
“It is you, Grant. She brings out the best in you. You need to stop letting what your mom did control your life. You are not her. Bella was the first girl you ever let your guard down with and that’s why you didn’t call her. Damn, man, you were a miserable fuck for so long after you got back. And I bet you still have that picture of the two of you in your desk drawer. Let it go, bro. You deserve a life of happiness, and you deserve someone as special as Bella. She was your one and only love. Don’t let her get away a second time. If you do, I might have to end our friendship.” He took a sip of his beer.
“You would do that? Seriously?”
“Damn right I would. And you know why? Because you’re being dumb, and I don’t hang around with dumb people.”
“Shut the fuck up.” I smiled as I lightly punched his arm.
I looked over and Bella and Ami walked into the living room. After she gave Bella a hug, I walked her and Lamar to the door.
“We talked, and she’s in a really bad place right now. It’s going to take some time for her to feel somewhat normal again. If you don’t think you can deal with it or take care of her, I will,” she spoke in a serious tone.
“I am, and I will take care of her, Ami.”
“Okay. I’m placing my trust in you, Grant.”
“You don’t have to worry. You have my word.”
I shut the door, walked over to the couch and sat down next to Bella.
“I’m not going to ask you if you’re okay, because I know you’re not. And it’s okay not to be okay. I have something for you.”
“You do?” Her sad eyes stared at me.
“Wait right here.”
I unzipped the black duffle bag I set in the corner and pulled out a long pink velvet box.
“I should have given you this fourteen years ago.”
She looked down at the box and slowly opened the lid. Placing her hand over her mouth she looked up at me in shock.
“Do you remember that?” I asked.
“This is the bracelet I fell in love with when we went to that market in Maui. Grant, how—”
“I bought it for you the day you left. I knew your birthday was two weeks later and I was going to give it to you then. But I never ended up calling you.” I looked away in shame.
“You kept it all this time?”
“I guess I had some sort of hope that I would be able to give it to you someday.”
“I don’t know what to say except thank you. I love it.” She leaned in and brushed her lips against mine. “Can you help me put it on?”
“Of course.”
I hooked the freshwater pearl bracelet with the plumeria clasp around her wrist and held it.
“I want to tell you the real reason why I never called you like I promised.”
“Okay,” she softly spoke.
“There was something I never told you about my mother,” I paused for a moment, “I haven’t seen or heard from her in twenty years.”
“What?” Her brows furrowed.
“I was ten years old. The day my mother left she had asked my dad if he could pick me up from school because she had an errand to run. He did, and when we got home, there was note on the kitchen table. She said she wasn’t happy, and she was going to find herself. She told us she was sorry, but she had to do what was best for her and for us. She said she couldn’t make us happy if she wasn’t happy. We haven’t seen her since.”
“Oh my God, Grant. I’m so sorry.”
“My mother leaving destroyed me emotionally. And she destroyed my father. He started drinking heavily after she left. I’d never seen him like that before. He was a mess. So not only was I trying to deal with my feelings, but I was also trying to take care of my dad. I saw how powerful love was and not in a good way. The destruction she left behind has always been with me. I made a vow the night I picked up my drunken father off the floor and put him to bed that I would never fall in love and subject myself to that kind of pain again. Then I saw you sitting by the pool in Hawaii in your black and pink bikini, and I just thought you were another pretty girl. But then after we talked and spent all that time together, I felt things I couldn’t comprehend. It scared me, Bella. It scared me down to my soul. The day you left, I went and bought that bracelet because I knew how much you loved it, and I was planning on giving it to you. But the more I thought about it, the more I couldn’t risk getting hurt or hurting you. I knew you’d be upset for a while, but you’d eventually get over it. It was easier that way. At least in my fucked-up head.”
Chapter 31
Bella
Tears filled my eyes as I listened to him.
“Why didn’t you just tell me about your mom?”
“Because I didn’t want you to see or know how broken I really was. When you showed up at my open house, I nearly died when I saw you standing there. I honestly thought I was dreaming at first. To see you again after all these years was so surreal. There wasn’t a day that passed I didn’t think about you. I even have a picture of the two of us from Hawaii. I keep it in the drawer of my desk at the office. Whenever I’m feeling stressed out or lonely, I take it out and stare at it. And I think what my life would have been like if I would have just put my fears aside and called you.”
“You damaged me, Grant. I never got over you and I carried what we shared into every relationship I had with a guy. I never stuck around too long because they weren’t you. I intentionally self-sabotaged all my relationships because I found it too hard to trust what a man said to me. When Ian and I first met, he asked me about my previous relationships, and I told him about you. Apparently, I even called out your name a couple times in my sleep. When Ian came to the office that day, he told me he could never compete with you and that no man ever could. I hated you so much for hurting me the way you did, but you made me who I am today. You took that shy and timid sixteen-year-old girl and turned her in a strong and independent woman. I can’t hate you for that.”
“Why didn’t you try to get in touch with me when you were in New York all those years ago?”
“Because I knew if I did, I would have fallen in love with you, and I wasn’t mature enough to go through that again.”
“And now?” he asked as he placed his hand on my cheek.
“I better be mature at
thirty years old.” I laughed and he laughed with me.
“I love you, Bella Marcus. I always have.” His thumb wiped away my tears.
“Then why did you stop asking me out after you found out I was pregnant?”
“Because that goddamn fear crept up inside me again. Plus, I wanted to give you time to process everything that was going on. I was going to ask you out.”
“Oh yeah? You were?” Her brows raised.
“Yeah. I was.” I smiled. “Because now that you’re here, I can’t seem to stay away from you. You have me hook, line and sinker, just like you did when we were sixteen years old.” He placed his forehead against mine.
“I love you, Grant Roman.”
“I love you, too, Bella.” Our lips met for a tender kiss.
He broke our kiss and got up from the couch. Grabbing my phone, he handed it to me.
“Unlock it.”
“Why?” I smiled.
“You’ll see. Trust me.”
I unlocked my phone and handed it back to him. A moment later, the song You Want to Make A Memory came over the built-in speakers in the apartment. He held out his hand and I placed mine in his.
“Just take it slow,” he said and then began singing the lyrics to me while we slowly swayed back and forth.
Our eyes stayed locked on each other’s while we danced. And when the song ended, our lips locked in a passionate kiss.
“We’ll get through this together. Just you and me, babe. I’m never leaving you again. You have my word.”
Chapter 32
Myles
“Bella? What are you doing here?” I asked as I walked into Grant’s office.
“Welcome back, Myles. I work here, remember?”
“But shouldn’t you be at home resting?”
“I’ve rested long enough. It’s time to get back to life.”
“Are you okay?”
“I’m getting there. Taking it one day at a time. How was Chicago?”
“It was good. Where’s Grant?”
“He’s on his way back now. He was closing a deal on two apartments at the West 21 building.”
“Excellent. That’s what I like to hear.”
“Dad. Welcome back.”
“Thanks, son.” I gave him a hug.
“I need to head to an appointment. I will see both of you later.” She walked over and kissed Grant’s lips.
“See you, babe.”
“What is going on? Did I miss something while I was gone a few days? Are the two of you together now?”
“Yeah, Dad. We are. I’m in love with her and I have been for years.”
“Well. I’m happy for you both. I like Bella, and I think she’s good for you. But, if you do anything to piss her off and cause her to break up with you and she leaves this company, you’ll have me to deal with.”
“Don’t worry.” He chuckled. “She’s not going anywhere.”
“How is she doing? Should she be back to work so soon?”
“Dad, if I had my way, she’d be at home in bed still. But she said she needed to get back to work to keep herself busy. She has her moments. Last night we were having dinner at my place, and she just started crying. She’s putting on a brave face, but she’s still hurting inside.”
“That’s to be expected.”
“How was Chicago?”
“It was good. I decided to pass on the building.”
“Why?”
“It just didn’t feel right. Simon called me last night and said there’s a building going up for sale on West 37th. It’s twenty-two stories, and I’m going to look at it this afternoon. If it’s the building I’m thinking of, it’ll be perfect for a hotel. I want you to come with me.”
“What time are you going?”
“Around one o’clock.”
“I have a private showing at two. So, I’ll meet you there.”
“Okay. Good.”
“How is Cassandra?”
“She’s good. She had a nice time in Chicago.”
He sat there and narrowed his eye at me.
“Are things getting serious between the two of you?”
“No. They are not.” I arched my brow at him. “I have to go. I’ll see you at the building at one o’clock.”
I heard my phone ding and when I pulled it from my pocket, I saw a text message from Cassandra.
“Good morning, handsome. I missed seeing you this morning. My bed just didn’t feel the same without you. Have a great day. Dinner tonight?”
After I read it, I placed my phone back inside my pocket, and sighed. Things with Cassandra were moving way too fast. We had a great time in Chicago. Maybe it was too great. The hand holding, the sex, the amazing conversations, all left me with reminders of what I promised I wouldn’t allow myself to feel again. She was hinting towards a relationship. I couldn’t do it. I wouldn’t do it. Relationships are great in the beginning, but they eventually turn messy. My life was clean and organized. I had my priorities, and a relationship wasn’t a part of that. She was going to be hurt and I hated myself for having to do it, but it was better I stopped seeing her now before things really got out of control.
One Week Later
Bella
“Listen Harry, I’m doing my best to get you as close to asking price as possible.”
“As far as I’m concerned, you’re not doing enough. I need this apartment sold yesterday, Bella!” he shouted over the phone. “It’s been up for sale for a year and a half, and I’ve been through three different brokers already. Do you want me to search for broker number five?”
I was in no mood, and I didn’t deserve to be talked to in that manner. My hormones were still all over the place, and I was tired.
“Then do it, Harry. I’m not stopping you. Go ahead and find someone else to sell your apartment because frankly, I don’t want to work with you anymore. You’re arrogant, rude and entitled and I’m tired of it.”
“Bella, consider yourself fired!” He yelled and I heard a click.
“Damn. That man needs a good kick in the balls,” Cody said. “But you kicked his ass, boo. I’m going to grab some lunch. Do either of you want anything?”
“No, thanks,” both Grant and I spoke at the same time.
“Come here.” Grant held out his arms.
Walking over to his desk, I sat down on his lap and wrapped my arms around his neck.
“The guy is a dick, and you don’t need him or his sale. He shouldn’t be speaking to you like that.”
“I got fired.” I pouted.
“His loss. I’d never fire you. Even if you told me I was arrogant, rude and entitled.” His lips formed a smirk.
“No?” My lips met his.
“Never.”
Suddenly, my phone rang, so I got up and walked over to my desk.
“It’s Harry.” I turned to Grant.
“Don’t answer it. In fact, block his ass.”
I let out a light laugh as I answered the call and put it on speaker.
“Harry?” I spoke in a stern voice.
“I’m sorry, and I want you back. Even though your words hurt me.”
I looked at Grant and rolled my eyes.
“I’m afraid that won’t be possible.”
“Come on, Bella. I’m sorry and I’m not a man that says that very often. It’s just I’m having a bad day and you caught me off guard with that offer. I honestly don’t have the time or energy to find someone else right now.”
“I’ll consider it, but I have conditions.”
“And what are your conditions?” he heavily sighed.
“You are not to call me anymore. You will hear from me when I have an offer. Any offer. And if it’s an offer you don’t like, you will simply tell me no and thank me for calling you. There will be no yelling or threatening of any kind. You will not question my ability to sell real estate and I won’t spread the word about what an asshole you are at times.”
“Fine. You have yourself a deal. You don’t need to spread
the word, everyone who knows me already knows I’m an asshole. Have a good day.”
“You too, Harry.” I ended the call.
“Bravo, my beautiful tigress.” Grant clapped as he got up from his desk, walked over, wrapped his arms around me, and pulled me into a loving hug.
“I want to do something tonight,” I said.
“Really?” He broke our embrace. “Are you sure you feel up to it?”
“Yeah. I’m sure.”
“Name something and we’ll do it.”
“Let’s go out for pizza and hit up a couple art galleries.”
“Sounds good. Are you looking for a piece of art?”
“No.” I smiled as my fingers held onto the collar of his shirt. “I just want to look.”
“Alright. Sounds like a plan.” The corners of his mouth curved upward as he pressed his forehead against mine. “Maybe I can ask my dad if he and Cassandra would like to join us.”
“Yes. Of course. That’ll be fun.”
His lips softly brushed against mine, and then he pulled away.
“I’ll go ask him now and then I have a meeting with a client to show Penthouse B.”
“Good luck. If you can’t sell it, I’ll sell it for you.” I smirked.
“I have no doubt you will. I love you.”
“I love you too.”
I watched him walk his sexy body out of the office and then I sat down at my desk. The doctor told me to abstain from having sex for at least two weeks after the miscarriage. Today had been exactly two weeks. I knew Grant was getting antsy, and I wanted nothing more than to have sex with him. We couldn’t even properly celebrate us as a couple. But tonight would be the night. I’d decided to get the Depo shot versus taking a daily birth control pill. I knew me and my hectic life and would ultimately screw the pills up.
“Excuse me, love,” Cody said as stood in the doorway.
“What’s up?” I smiled at him.
“There’s a woman out here to see Grant. Is he around?”
“A woman?” I narrowed my eye at him.
“Don’t worry. She’s older.”
“It could be a client of his. He’s on his way to a showing, and I don’t think he’ll be back.”