The bell rang, snapping Kaitlyn from her thoughts. Students in her first period class entered the room. She clicked off the website and was about to close her laptop when she saw the news flash come across her Yahoo screen. She saw helicopters flying over a multi-car crash. She read the caption and saw that the accident was in Ohio and closed the laptop. It didn’t concern her because she lived in Illinois. What could she do anyway? She was a school teacher, and as far as she knew, the crash didn’t have anything to do with her.
She waited until everyone took their seats before beginning her class. Kaitlyn felt another jolt in her lower belly, but this time it was different. It felt as though something in her had changed. Was there something wrong with the baby? She was only eight weeks along. It was possible that she could miscarry, but she hoped that she wouldn’t. She had never been this far along before, so she wasn’t sure what to expect. Seconds later, the pain was gone, and she was fine, but she would stop at the nurse’s station and talk to Ellen and see what she thought.
~ ~ ~
“I’m sure it’s nothing but your body getting ready to change,” Ellen said. “When do you go see the doctor?”
“I was there less than two weeks ago, but I felt fine. I’m sure you’re right. It’s probably my body changing or my nerves about telling Ben,” Kaitlyn replied, wishing she hadn’t said the last part.
“You haven’t told him yet?” Ellen asked, surprised.
“No, I wanted to be certain and then he had to go out of town again. Besides, I want it to be special,” she lied. It’ll be special when I finally leave him, she thought.
Ellen nodded and sat back in her leather chair. “I’m sure he’ll be thrilled!” Ellen smiled.
Kaitlyn left the nurse’s station and walked back to her classroom, feeling better than she had this morning. By the end of the day, she was back to herself again. She grabbed her things and left the school, walking toward her car.
Usually, Ben would text her when he arrived at work and when he was on his way home, but the last time she heard from him was early this morning. It wasn’t strange for them not to talk when he was on a business trip; besides, she didn’t want to panic, thinking something was amiss. When Ben was working, you did not call him!
She didn’t need to start overthinking about something that probably wasn’t wrong to begin with. Maybe he had gotten busy and it slipped his mind. But that wasn’t something that happened with Ben. He was always aware of everything and never forgot a thing.
She’d felt more uncomfortable since finding the tracking device. She was always looking in her rearview mirror to see if he was following her instead of at work or out of town like he said he was. Part of her wondered if he hired a private detective to watch her when he couldn’t, but she hadn’t seen anything out of the ordinary. No cars were following her, and there were no parked cars outside their home that weren’t usually there. She was just being cautious but was still scared of what he might do to her.
She sent Ben a text before leaving the school parking lot and by the time she arrived home fifteen minutes later, he still hadn’t replied. It was almost four in the afternoon and she wondered if she should try calling him, willing the thought to call him away because she knew she shouldn’t and didn’t want to give him a reason to hit her later. She went to exit out of the favorite’s app, but her finger accidentally dialed his number.
“Shit, shit, shit,” she mumbled, but then was thankful the call had gone straight to voicemail, which told her he was most likely either in a meeting or on his way home. It wasn’t like him to be on his phone while driving. In fact, it was another thing that made him furious with her and other people. Especially other people, and she would get the beaten because of someone else’s wrongdoing. His temper would flare and for some reason, unlike most people he couldn’t control his anger and had to hit something. That something always seemed to be Kaitlyn.
She arrived home and gathered the mail from the mailbox. She hadn’t noticed before how quiet everything seemed to be when she came home from work. No one was mowing their lawns or raking their grass. Even her neighbor Angie wasn’t outside tending to her flower garden like she did every late afternoon. Maybe it had to do with the worry in her mind about Ben? He’d taken many trips in the past so why was this one any different? Why did she have such an uneasy feeling just because he didn’t answer his phone? She should be thrilled that he didn’t. She was always on edge when they talked, afraid she’d say something, and he would take it out on her when he got home. Ben not answering the phone made her more on edge because not knowing where he was, scared her to death.
Before closing the garage door, she looked around the yard and down the street but didn’t see anything unusual. Why did she have this feeling like someone was watching her? There was no one on the street. You’re being silly, she thought, not that she didn’t have the right to feel this way. She needed to be careful; Ben wasn’t someone to be trusted. She pushed the button, closing the garage door. The chains rattled as the door slowly descended, closing off all signs of life. Kaitlyn opened the door and went inside.
~ ~ ~
The next twenty minutes passed by quickly as she drove to the restaurant to meet Ben. Kaitlyn was full of nerves, and she felt sick to her stomach. She was anxious to see what Ben wanted to talk to her about. Did he know that she was pregnant? She was sure that he didn’t. She hadn’t told anyone but the doctor and Ellen at work. She hadn’t done a pregnancy test at home in fear he would go through the garbage and find the box. Nope, it couldn’t be about the baby, she was sure of it.
After parking her car, she stood outside and scanned the vehicles already in the parking lot. She didn’t see Ben’s blue Chevy Malibu anywhere. She wanted to laugh at herself because she was being paranoid that there was something wrong, though she had reasons to be scared. She should’ve packed her things and ran instead of coming here. Her bones ached at the fear she was feeling about the unexpected dinner plans, or was she more afraid of what he would do to her when they got home? She put a hand on her belly. What could he have to talk to her about?
She walked to the front of the restaurant and went inside, taking a seat at the table instead of waiting in the lobby. She told the waiter that she was waiting for someone and asked for a glass of water. Minutes ticked by and she glanced at her watch, 6:45 p.m. and still no Ben. She pulled out her phone to see if he’d called and left a message. Sometimes when her phone was in her purse she couldn’t hear it ring. There was nothing. Not even a text. Where was Ben?
9
Kaitlyn told the waiter at the restaurant that there was an emergency and she had to leave. She was panicking when she left the restaurant. Part of her was afraid to go home. What if he had planned this and when she arrived home and went inside he’d beat her to a pulp? But why? She’d been on her best behavior since the fight two weeks ago when he tried to strangle her in their kitchen.
Once outside the restaurant, the fresh warm air enveloped her, almost choking her. Thoughts of Ben with his hand squeezing her throat came at her. She looked around to see if anyone was looking at her, then hurried to her car, checking her phone as she ran in fear.
Ben still hadn’t answered any of her calls or texts. Ben always told her to answer her phone when he called, but how was it different when she called him? She was sure that something had to be wrong, right? Who could she call? It was Friday and after seven in the evening. There would be no one in the building where Ben worked downtown. She was sure of this.
She arrived at her car and climbed inside, her body shaking. A spider of tingles ran down her spine. This wasn’t the first time she’d felt this scared, terrified of what was to come. She had to keep calm for the baby inside her. She had to stop and think. “Calm down and think,” she mumbled into the empty car.
She took in a deep breath, resting her head back against the headrest, and exhaled while closing her eyes. Her mind was whirling like a finished film on a reel as she tried to think what
could’ve happened to him. Should she be worried when she got home? Would he be there waiting for her? If she saw his car in the driveway, she would just keep on driving. She wouldn’t stop until she was someplace safe. Yes, that was exactly what she’d do.
She drove toward home, still trying to contact her husband, although she wasn’t sure why because the phone kept going straight to voicemail. Kaitlyn knew it wasn’t safe to be on the phone while driving, especially in the state of mind she was in, but today was different. Today she hadn’t heard from her husband since he’d left this morning and it scared the shit out of her not knowing where he was. Maybe this is a good thing, her mind quipped. Stop worrying over nothing. So what if he isn’t answering his phone. Just go home and pack your things and get in the car and drive far far away from this place and never look back.
A loud ringing filled the car, making Kaitlyn swerve into the other lane, horns blaring. Her mind was not on her driving. She needed to pay attention before something terrible happened to her and the baby. The ringing sounded again, and she quickly pressed the green button on her steering wheel. “Hello,” she answered, feeling the panic flow through her body as she waited to hear Ben’s voice.
“Hello, may I please speak to Mrs. Kaitlyn Gordon?” the woman asked through the car speaker.
She heard a woman’s voice coming through the speakers, not Ben’s. She exhaled the breath she was holding. “Yes, this is Mrs. Gordon. May I ask who is calling?” Kaitlyn asked.
“Oh sorry. This is Officer Moore. I’m with the Edon Police Department.”
“I’m sorry, Edon Police Department?”
“Yes, ma’am.”
“May I ask what this is about?” Kaitlyn asked. She listened as the officer on the other line filled her in on what had happened.
Kaitlyn sucked in a breath. The signs were there. All day she’d felt that there was something not right, but thought it was the baby. Now she knew. Listening to this woman on the other end of the phone telling her that there’d been an accident changed everything. Yes, of course, something terrible must have happened to him. He would have never stood her up. Ben was never late for anything.
“Oh my God, is he dead?” Kaitlyn screamed into the car. That was a little over the top, she thought. She didn’t need the officer thinking she was glad if he were.
“No, Mrs. Gordon, he’s not dead, but he is unconscious at the moment.”
“Oh,” Kaitlyn replied, wishing she hadn’t said the word. She didn’t need the officer thinking that she was disappointed. Kaitlyn needed to clear the silence between them. “Please, tell me he’s okay?” Did she really care if he were? He’d been beating and controlling her for years and now the moment something happened to him, she cared? she thought. No that wasn’t it. She just wanted to know that she was okay. That she had nothing to worry about. That he wouldn’t hurt her.
“He was taken to Edon Hospital just inside the state line in Ohio. I can give you the address if you wish.”
“Yes, of course.” Kaitlyn pulled onto the shoulder of the highway and quickly shifted into park with her hazards on. She dug inside her purse for a piece of paper and a pen. “Okay, I’m ready. What hospital?” Kaitlyn asked and wrote down the address and name of the hospital Officer Moore had given her. “I’ll be there as soon as I can,” Kaitlyn said as she typed the address into the navigation system in her car. She was about to hang up, then asked, “Is he all right? How bad are his injuries?”
“I’m not sure, ma’am. I was the one who found him, but then the EMTs started working on him and took him straight to the hospital. I’m so sorry.”
There were no tears streaming down Kaitlyn’s face as she listened to Officer Moore apologize to her about the accident that Kaitlyn was sure Officer Moore hadn’t caused.
“Mrs. Gordon are you still there?” Moore asked.
“Yes, I’m here. I’m on my way. According to the GPS, it will take me three hours to get there.” With the frame of mind she was in, she really shouldn’t be driving at all, but she didn’t care. She needed to get to the hospital.
“I can be at the hospital when you get there,” Officer Moore said, snapping Kaitlyn from her thoughts.
Kaitlyn nodded, forgetting that she was on the phone. “That would be nice of you. I should be there in a few hours. I’m coming from Illinois.”
“Let me give you my cell number so you can call me when you get close. I can meet you at the hospital, Mrs. Gordon.”
Kaitlyn grabbed the paper from the passenger seat and scribbled down Officer Moore’s number. “Yes, yes, I’ll do that. Thank you so much for calling.”
“It’s my duty, Ma’am,” Officer Moore said, then ended the call.
A horn honked at Kaitlyn as she eased back onto the highway and quickly turned the wheel back toward the side of the road. This time she glanced in her mirror before continuing onto the highway. Kaitlyn took in a deep breath. She had a long drive ahead of her and she needed to keep her focus on the road, but her mind kept repeating the word Ohio. Adam lived in Ohio.
~ ~ ~
Three hours and ten minutes later, Kaitlyn parked her car in the parking lot of Edon Hospital. She grabbed her purse and opened the car door. The lights of the hospital were lit up like the fourth of July. She hadn’t realized during her drive how quickly the day had turned into night.
She started toward the entrance of the hospital when she was approached by a black woman wearing a t-shirt with Edon Police embroidered onto the left breast area and blue jeans. “Mrs. Gordon?” Officer Moore asked.
Kaitlyn had called Officer Moore when she crossed the state line, telling her what she’d be wearing. “Yes,” Kaitlyn nodded. She imagined the officer being younger by the tone of her voice through the car speakers and was surprised by how much older she was in person and that she’d chosen to be a police officer. She didn’t look like someone that could rough up some bad guys.
Officer Moore held out her hand, but Kaitlyn didn’t take it, so she let it drop to her side. “I was just inside talking to the receptionist.” She stopped talking and held out her other hand. “I found this at the scene.” Moore held out the wallet she’d found at the wreckage. “I thought you’d want to have it.”
Kaitlyn took the wallet. It was a gift she’d given Ben four Christmases ago. She had it engraved on the lower corner on the outside. To my loving Husband, Love Kaitlyn. Wasn’t that a crock of shit, the voice said in her head. She flipped the wallet over and over in her hand before rubbing her thumb over the words. “I need to see him,” she said, choking back on her words. No matter what he’d done to her, she needed to see him. She needed to see with her own eyes that he was suffering as much as she had been all these years from his hands hitting her.
“I can go with you if you want?” Moore suggested.
Kaitlyn nodded.
They walked into the hospital and toward the receptionist’s desk. “I’m here to see my husband, Ben Gordon. He was in an accident earlier today.”
“Can I see your driver’s license?” The woman behind the counter asked.
Kaitlyn handed her the ID and the woman typed in Ben’s name and gave Kaitlyn his room number. “Just take the elevator to the fourth floor and make a right. The door will be on your left.”
“Okay,” Kaitlyn whispered. Her body began to shake, and her legs felt as if they were about to buckle beneath her. Officer Moore must have seen that she was about to fall to the ground and placed an arm around Kaitlyn.
“Are you okay?” Moore asked sympathetically.
Kaitlyn nodded. The officer was kind enough to help guide Kaitlyn to the elevator and rode up with her to the fourth floor. Once at the nurse’s counter, Officer Moore spoke to a nurse.
“Thank you so much for all you’ve done,” Kaitlyn said before the nurse took Kaitlyn to where Ben was.
“It was no problem. I’ll check in with you tomorrow and see how he’s doing. I’ll need to ask him some questions—if he’s awake, that is,” Moore replied
before she turned and walked out the glass sliders and to the elevator.
Kaitlyn walked to the side of the bed, looking down at Ben. His right leg was in a cast and raised up in a sling to help with swelling. The top of his head and face were wrapped in a white bandage. She grabbed hold of his hand and squeezed. No tears came as she stood beside the bed. She wondered if she should make it look like she cared and was devastated by his appearance. Just in case Officer Moore was still watching.
Something shifted inside her. She wasn’t afraid to lose him, was she? Even after everything he did to her, could she be scared that he would die? She had lost someone she loved once before, and it tore her world apart. Ben couldn’t hurt her here, not while he was unconscious lying in this hospital bed.
A thought came to her. If he woke and was a different man, would she stay with him? But she couldn’t stay. Didn’t want to stay. Ben had hurt her. Betrayed her. He had taken Adam away from her.
10
The Day after the Accident
Nurse Leah walked across the room. “You know, I don’t mind coming in here and taking care of you,” she said to the man lying in the hospital bed. The man with no name, no identity. The same man from the crash who was pronounced brain-dead. She still couldn’t believe that the doctor had found a tumor in the man’s brain. Hadn’t the man known that there was something wrong and gone to see a doctor? Didn’t he suffer from headaches or nausea? Maybe even dizziness because of the tumor’s location?
The Accident Page 5