by Emily Bex
Rissa reassured her as she laid her hand across Kate’s stomach. “Oh they’re only supplements, nothing harmful for you or the baby. You must take them. You have such a strong warrior inside you.”
As her hand lay there, Rissa could feel the baby’s dying energy, its small body ravaged from the drug. There was very little heartbeat and she knew, within a few days, this would all be over.
Taking the pills from her, Rissa opened the bottle and removed two capsules, grabbing a small carafe of juice from the nightstand. She poured a glass and held the pills out to her.
“Now come, take them, and besides, you should be sleeping more. We don’t want you to do anything strenuous in these critical stages of your pregnancy. ” Yes, you stupid naive mouse, take more, so Alec can have his warrior back, and I can have my Alec.
Kate swallowed down the pills. “Thank you, Rissa, for the pills, and the doctor, and the baby gifts. It is a boy. I haven't had a scan, but I have felt all along it’s a boy. I could feel the male energy. No question.”
Rissa softly stroked her hair as she smiled at her. Ah, that’s what you think. Dead boy! “Oh Kate, I’m sure you can tell. I wish Alec would want children, I can only hope. So jealous of you! Now lie back, you look so exhausted. I won’t stay longer, I can tell you’re tired, and I don’t want to keep you up. I’ll leave the gift basket, and I’ve put together a portfolio of ideas for a baby shower. Look them over when you feel up to it, my sweet girl. I’ll call in a few days, and if you’re not up to seeing me, then we can just talk on the phone, and besides, with the extra dosage, you should be feeling better very soon.”
Rissa left the folder on the nightstand and leaned in, kissing her cheek. “Rest Kate, I’ll see myself out. Alec and I are supporting you both 100%, now sleep.”
Picking up her purse, she quietly left the room, smiling as she descended the stairs. Shade met her at the bottom, escorting her back to the front door. She had to control herself from skipping with joy, as she left the house and teleported back to G-town.
Shade had returned back upstairs to check on Kate, and re-adjust her pillows so she could lie down. Within minutes, she felt herself falling back to sleep. She had no concept of time passing, no sense of day or night. The only breaks in her sleep came when Gi entered to bring her food. Either he or Theresa was now staying to watch her eat, so she was no longer able to discard the food. No one mentioned anything about discovering her rouse, but somehow, she thought they’d figured it out. There was no way to eat all that they brought, so she picked at it, and ate what little she could. As soon as they took the tray away, she took the extra pills from Rissa.
She could always feel when Shade entered the room. Sometimes he spoke to her, sometimes he just touched her cheek, and other times she felt him lay down beside her. He was her only comfort in this darkness.
***
Rissa quickly arrived at her home office and kicked off her heels. She had a few hours of work to catch up on since she’d spent so much of the evening in Virginia. She felt the anger roll through Alec. Hell! Someone is not having a good night. She never paid much attention to his mood swings when he worked, there was always something that got him riled up at least once a day, but this felt more intense.
Checking the clock, not sure of his evening appointments, she thought, perhaps, her wicked vampire needed a bit of good news. Sliding out of her business dress, she snuggled onto the chaise lounge in her dressing room and decided to let him know how her visit went. She wished she could lure him home for a sweet snack. She was feeling her hunger rise rapidly and she ached to taste him. She needed him, and he knew it. He always made the wait such sweet torture, something she’d come to expect, but still struggled to manage. “My wicked vampire is not having a good night, but his devious darling has some wonderful news about that pesky mortal. Busy?”
Alec had a rough day, and the evening wasn’t going any better when he heard her speak to him in his head. He stood still and listened, then responded, “I’m never too busy for you, my devious darling, especially if you have something to brighten my day. What's up?”
Rissa smiled, glad to have his attention. “I called on the mortal. Good news. The pills have begun the process. She is quite ill. It won’t be long, but there’s more!”
Alec chuckled wickedly, as much at Rissa and the joy she was taking in this plan as this news itself. “What do you have up your sleeve, my darling?”
“I came bearing gifts and more pills. I’ve already convinced her she should sneak in more pills between the doses they give her. That thing inside her is already dying and dragging her down with it.”
Alec grinned. “What a brilliant idea! Do whatever is necessary to speed up the process. I had a talk with Shade today. He seems on top of this rival coven, but I can't afford for him to get off track, so the sooner the better. Maybe this warrior will tire of all the drama of sick mates and dead babies and get back to doing what he does best. Push her, Rissa, push hard. I know I can count on you.”
Rissa lounged seductively on the chaise lounge, hoping he got the visual. “Have I ever let you down? I inquired again about the feeder. Apparently, he already has one. I couldn’t get her to tell me who, but I’ll work on it. Not that it matters. She did clarify he’s not feeding from her. Will you be home later this evening? Your baby girl misses you.”
Alec looked at his watch. “I have a few things to wrap up here, but I should be home before too long. Have a drink and cigarette waiting, and you, of course, my darling. We’ll be celebrating soon, it sounds like.”
“I’m already waiting, wet and hungry, and all yours.”
Alec laughed. “Rissa, when are you not waiting, wet and hungry?”
She laughed wickedly. “Just get that sweet ass home to me and who knows...I may be involved in my own fun activities when you arrive.”
Alec shook his head. “Of that, my darling, I have no doubt. Now let me get back to work. I'll see you when I get home.”
84
It had been almost a week since Kate started taking the pills and Shade kept checking on her, as she just laid there like the dead. She ate little, took pills and slept, and this house felt like a morgue. He could barely take it any longer. As he left their bedroom, he closed the door softly behind him. Despite their blood bond, she didn’t respond to him. As he made his way downstairs, he knew he must look a mess. This was taking a toll on him as well, with Alec and the rogues, and these fucking pills and his bel sleeping like the dead, he was beside himself with worry.
He flopped down on the couch and sat staring, wondering what the hell he would do. He could feel her slipping away, but the doctor said she’d be ill. Before he could finish his thought, Gi appeared before him, looking a bit nervous.
“Master, I know it is not my place to come between matters of you and your lady, but I feel there is something you should know.”
Shade looked up at him. He had a feeling in his gut this wasn’t going to be good news. “Go on, Gi.”
“Master, Theresa has been cleaning my lady’s room every day, keeping everything as clean as possible. She has noticed that there are food bits floating in the toilet. I do not wish in any way to tell on her ladyship, for we love her dearly, but I fear something is amiss with these findings.”
“Gi, has she been sick? Throwing up? Perhaps that is what Theresa is seeing?”
“Oh no, master, these are un-eaten food pieces, as though she is…” He cleared his throat. “…depositing the plates of food down the toilet. So, we started staying while she eats. For a few days, she picked at her food, but now she is not eating anything. The trays remain untouched, but she continues taking the pills on a regular basis. I speak openly, master, but she has become quite peaked and weak very quickly.”
Shade absorbed everything Gi reported to him, and he knew suddenly, deep in his soul, that these pills were not helping her. They would kill her long before they helped the baby and he stood and paced. His heart was at a crossroads, and he felt
he must choose between his bel, or the baby.
In a quiet voice, he spoke to Gi,d “I have to make a decision, and I am torn beyond words. This may be devious, but I can’t let her go on like this. I can’t risk losing her, and that is my fear. There will be other bambinos, once I turn her. What can I do, Gi? I don’t want her to suffer any longer and I don’t want her to think it is her fault if she loses the bambino because I demanded she stop taking the pills.”
He felt Gi’s hand on his shoulder. “Master Shade, in life, we must sometimes make decisions that alter our course. We have all lost our bel rosso. You must help her. And we will help you if you need us.”
Shade’s heart felt as though it would break, but he made the choice for her. It was selfish of him, but he could not lose her. “Gi, take the pills, remove the medicine within them, fill them with something else, powdered sugar or something, and keep giving them to her. Perhaps we will see some change. I have no damn choice!”
“Master Shade, it will be done, we will see then how it works. Do not riddle your soul with guilt. You are saving her master, for all of us.”
***
Kate didn’t know how many extra pills Rissa had brought, or how many days had passed, but she had taken all of Rissa’s pills now, so the only pills she took were those brought to her by Gi.
As she moved into the second day of just taking the original dosage, she started to sleep a little less, and to actually feel hungry again. Not enough to eat everything that was brought, but at least she was craving food, and Shade's blood, and that had to be a good sign. She felt relieved that her body was adjusting, and hoped Rissa's pills had given her the jump start her body needed after all.
***
Gi reported to Shade, "Master, we have been giving my lady the placebo pills for three days now. The first day, I didn't see any difference, but on the second day, she was eating a little, and now today, she was already awake when we took in her food tray, and she is regaining her appetite, eating a little more. It is still small, but I can tell she wants the food she is eating and is not picking at it because she is being supervised. I think your decision to switch out the pills was a wise one. I think you will have my lady back as soon as this medicine is flushed from her system. Theresa and I will continue to watch her closely, and if there is any change, we will let you know immediately."
“That is good news, very good news!”
He needed to see her. Pushing past Gi, he rushed up the stairs and burst in through the door of the bedroom and stopped dead in his tracks. She was sitting up, her color was back, but there were still dark circles under her eyes and she still looked weak as hell. But he could tell Theresa had helped her bathe, and her hair was brushed, which meant she was moving about.
He had been riddled with guilt from his decision, but he kept telling himself he did this for bel, not for him, but he was kidding no one. He was selfish, he would not lose her. Walking to the bed, he got a weak smile from her and he lay down beside her, taking her into his arms and holding her.
“Bel, you look better. How are you feeling?”
“Lover...I felt like I was away somewhere, lost...and I couldn't find my way back. But now I’m home, and with you. How I’ve missed you. I know you were here, I could sense it, but it felt far away. It feels so good to be held. I’m much better.”
“Cazzo, Kate, you scared the living hell out of me, I never felt so damn lost, and I thought I would lose my mind. I was so scared and helpless. I am so grateful you came back to me. I wanted you to fight, I could tell you were trying, but just couldn’t make it. I was here the whole time. Every second I could find, I was here. I wish you would feed. It would make me feel better. Would you do that for me, can you manage it?”
“Yes. I was starting to crave your blood today, for the first time in…I can't even remember how many days. That’s a good sign, don't you think?”
He smiled softly. “Si, very good sign indeed. Now, hold still.”
Getting out of the bed, he took off his black tee. Leaning down, he carefully picked her up in his arms, and cradled her close to his chest. Grabbing a blanket, he wrapped it around her and walked to the large arm chair by the window. He looked into her eyes, absorbing all of her.
“I have missed looking at you, holding you, talking to you, feeling you make me feel alive. This house is so quiet. Mio bel was gone. Perhaps, we are past the worst and things will get much better, now come and feed. Take all you need.”
Pulling her up to his neck, he cupped her head and supported her back. “I love you so damn much, bel.”
Her lips grazed his neck, and she loved the feel of him, the scent of him. She bit into his skin, but she didn’t bite hard enough. She didn’t draw blood.
"Mi amore, you must try harder. Drink."
She bit him a second time, harder, breaking through his skin and feeling his warm blood seep into her mouth. She drew his blood into her mouth, and as she swallowed, she could feel his energy healing her from the inside out. This was what her body needed. She continued to drink from him, slowly; small swallows, but each swallow bringing more healing, and peace. Such comfort, her eyes felt heavy as her body felt restored and she felt sleepy, but this was a natural sleepiness, not that dark hole that held her captive for so long. She drank her fill, and with the last swallow, she felt herself drift back into a deep natural sleep.
Shade was distraught when her first attempt to feed showed him just how weak she had become. He fought back the panic, hoping she wouldn’t fall back into that abyss, but finally, she fed. He knew she was taking enough to sustain her and held her close. After some time, he felt her body relax into a sleep, her head against his shoulder. He sat staring at her body, looking rail thin, but with so much fight. He felt the trickle of his own blood run down his neck from her unfinished feeding, as the blood tears ran down his cheeks.
“I won’t let you go, bel, I won’t. Forgive me, mi amore.”
Standing, he cradled her gently as she slept soundly, and carried her back to their bed. He laid her down and then stripped naked. He kissed her gently, getting in bed beside her, pulling her to his chest and he knew, he’d do all in his power to save her, and this journey wasn’t over.
85
Shade laid there as she slept. She seemed to be in a much better place now, sleeping more peacefully. Slipping quietly from their bed, his mind was so tormented, he went outside for a smoke and found all he could do was pace and worry.
Luca could feel his master’s turmoil, and looked outside to see him pacing, and watched as he finally sat down. He seemed defeated, something Luca had never seen in him before. His head hung down, the cigarette dangling from his mouth, and Luca wondered if either of them would be able to make it for the duration of this pregnancy. Both of them were so lost without the other, in pain each in their own way. My lady had been so ill, she seemed completely unaware of her surroundings, and sometimes even unaware of master, and it broke him. This child had become something that could easily take one or both of them out. Luca didn’t like it, he didn’t want to lose either of them, and if anything happened to my lady, Shade would surely follow her into that blackness. If something happened to the child, they would both suffer greatly, and Luca was stuck on how to comfort either of them. Walking outside, Luca joined him, feeling, perhaps, he just needed to talk. “Master, got a smoke?”
Shade’s head snapped up, he hadn’t even heard Luca come out. “Sure, help yourself.” Shade threw him the pack of cigarettes and the lighter.
Luca caught the pack and lit up. “My lady seemed a bit better today, up and moving some. How is she tonight?”
Shade looked at him and shook his head. “Luca, she had a better day, but I fear it is only a small reprieve. She fed from me tonight and was not strong enough to break my skin. It wasn’t normal, she fell asleep feeding. Fuck! It is hell without her, the pain and worry are eating me alive. I did this to her! I got her in this situation, put her in jeopardy, and watching her suffer through this i
llness almost kills me. She seems a little better. I told her this was probably the worst of it, but I have no idea what lies ahead.”
“Master, there is only so much you can do.”
“Si, Luca. And in that, lies the hardest part of all, I can do nothing to help her, I cannot fix this, make it right for her, make this pain go away. And that pains my heart to the core.” If he only knew the things I have selfishly done to save her. There is hope, she is eating now, and I can only hang onto the smallest of hope that every day she will get better. Those damn pills almost took her away from me, and if I have to lose the bambino to keep her, then that is what I will continue to do. But that deception will die with Gi and me, for I will never confess to her or anyone that I have chosen that path for us.
“Master, you need something to take your mind off of this, let’s walk out to the garage, maybe we should fire up the bikes and take a spin? Work off some pent-up energy. We both could use it.”
“I love the idea Luca, but I am not leaving here. I am sticking close to this house in case she needs me. But hell, let’s walk down to the garage and take a look, maybe give them a good detailing and if bel feels better soon, we can take a short spin one night.”
They walked down to the garage. Shade felt better when he could at least keep his hands busy. As they got inside, he saw his custom Harley and sat astride the machine and lit up a smoke. Yeah, this feels good. Real damn good!
86
Kate was feeling much better, still a little tired and Shade was insisting she remain in bed. At least she was awake, sitting upright, reading a book, and her appetite was back. She wasn’t ravenous for food like she’d been before she got sick, but she at least had her normal appetite back. Gi still brought her food and pills, and she was grateful her body had adjusted to those pills. The darkness, the black hole they kept her in, she wasn’t sure she could have endured that much longer.