by B. B. Reid
Ignoring me, Vaughn grinned at Jason. “I think she likes you, bro.”
Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed Jamie’s lips flatten. My stomach tightened, and I lost my breath. I didn’t know which way was up as my world spun out of control. How was such a powerful reaction to such a simple gesture possible?
Once again, I dismissed the thought of a boy liking me—of Jamie actually being jealous—as quickly as it had come. Since arriving, Jamie had done nothing else but make me feel unwelcome in my own town, my own crew.
Not wanting to hurt Jason’s feelings, I said nothing, which only seemed to piss Jamie off more. Did he think I liked Jason?
Shrugging, I told myself I didn’t care. It was weird that he’d be mad, anyway, since we hated each other.
Ever’s bored sigh drew my attention. Keeping him entertained was getting to be a full-time job. When Ever got bored, Ever got reckless, and his mother… his mother seemed to be at her wit’s end. His parents had just kept him from being sent to juvie last month when he went joyriding in our math teacher’s car and all because Mrs. Lynch had given him detention for getting gum in Becky Marsh’s hair. He hadn’t done it on purpose. The boys had a stupid contest to see who could spit their gum the furthest. Unfortunately, I’d been in social studies at the time, or I might have prevented it from happening.
“What do you guys want to do first?” Ever asked.
“Bumper cars.”
“Turkey legs.”
“Ferris wheel,” Jamie and I said at the same time. He looked at me, and I wondered if my expression matched his—curious but wary.
“Why don’t we just split up?” Vaughn suggested. “I’m starved, and I don’t want to ride some fucking wheel. Since the bumper car line is long as shit, Ever and Jason can hold our spots while Jamie and Bee do whatever they want.”
Whatever we want, my mind echoed.
What did I want? The answer should have been ‘nothing,’ but my heart felt like it was doing cartwheels at the opportunity.
I started to argue when I realized it was actually a good plan and one I would have thought of if I hadn’t been making eyes with the enemy. Keep your friends close and your enemies closer. I’d heard it in a movie once, and until Jameson Buchanan, I hadn’t understood. I used to think of Tommy as my archnemesis, but he had nothing on Jamie. Tommy didn’t keep me up at night or make me toss and turn whenever I did find sleep, and his presence didn’t do weird things to my insides. He didn’t make me want to run and hide.
And then hope he found me.
“Sounds good to me,” Jason said before he and Ever took off.
I gritted my teeth because the last thing I wanted to do was be left alone with Jamie. Vaughn hadn’t stuck around, either, to make sure I was okay with his plan, and was already halfway to one the many turkey leg stands.
Don’t be a chickenshit, Bee. You can do this.
One glance at Jamie and his cocky smirk, and I nearly choked on those words. I didn’t say a word to him before storming away. I didn’t have to look over my shoulder to know he was following me. I could feel his gaze burning hot on my back as he effortlessly kept up with my lengthy strides. My long legs allowed me to stand shoulder to shoulder with my crew. I knew one day they’d tower over me, but it wouldn’t matter. By then, their respect for me would outweigh the laws of biology. I’d make sure of it.
“You can run, but you can’t hide, pretty girl.”
I nearly bumped into Jamie when I whipped around. “What did you say?”
He stared back at me with a bland expression. “I didn’t say anything.”
“Yes, you did,” I bit out. “You were being a creep.”
“I don’t have time for this. Get your ears checked,” he spat before moving around me.
Refusing to follow him, I matched his lazy strides until we arrived at the Ferris wheel. There were only a couple of people in line, so in no time, we reached the operator. I slapped my forehead when the pudgy man held out his hand, and I realized he was waiting for our tickets. I’d completely forgotten to purchase some. The sign on the stand read two per rider. Swiveling my head, I looked for the nearest ticket booth and spotted one maybe twenty feet away. Before I could head in that direction, however, I nearly swallowed my tongue when Jamie handed the man four tickets.
“If you just wait for a second, I can get my own.” I still had a twenty left over from my allowance burning a hole in my dress pocket.
“I’d rather not,” was all Jamie said before grabbing my hand and tugging me through the gate the operator held open. He didn’t let my hand go, either, until we took our seats. As I gripped the metal safety bar, my hand was shaking and completely covered in sweat. His or mine?
I glanced at him as he slouched down, appearing completely relaxed as he made a point to stare straight ahead.
Definitely mine.
I might as well have not even been there. “Thank you for the tickets.”
The only response I got was his head turning slightly away, shielding his eyes from me. Sighing, I sat back. It was obvious he wasn’t interested in being friends. After the hell he put me through this week, no way should I have been considering it.
At least one of us was still thinking clearly.
The lights on the Ferris wheel lighting up was our only warning before the wheel began to slowly ascend backward. When we reached the top, I looked around excitedly. I couldn’t believe how high we’d gotten when we reached the top. It was my first time on a Ferris wheel, and when I met Jamie’s excited gaze, I knew instantly that it was his first time, too.
If I asked him, he’d probably deny it, so I reluctantly tore my gaze away to watch all the people who looked like dots now. I could see everything, including the empty field not far away where they were setting up for the fireworks tonight. It wasn’t until midnight, so I knew I’d miss them.
I began to panic, however, when I realized I was sliding closer and closer to Jamie as the wheel picked up speed and the bench began to rock. No matter how hard I resisted, gripping the safety bar to keep me in place, gravity seemed to be pushing me toward Jamie. Before long, our thighs were touching, and he stiffened in his seat.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to—”
“Whatever,” he mumbled, cutting me off.
I pulled away only to slide right back into him. I tried again but was stopped when he locked his arm around my waist.
“Give it a rest,” he whispered, his lips so close they brushed my forehead. “You aren’t going anywhere.”
I huffed as I tried to settle against him and ended up squirming out of nervousness instead. I just wanted off this damn wheel.
“So what’s your deal?” he asked the moment I relaxed.
I glanced up, but he wasn’t paying me any mind as he watched everyone enjoy themselves below.
“My deal? What makes you think I have one?”
“You’ve been a bitch to me since I got here.”
The wheel suddenly stopped, leaving us at the top, so I sat up and moved away. “Excuse me? You threw the first punch.” So to speak. Technically, I’d thrown the first punch, but I wouldn’t have if he hadn’t hogged all of Mrs. Greene’s cookies for himself and pushed me down when I confronted him.
“You didn’t like me before then.”
“How do you know?” I shot back.
He finally gave me his gaze. “I just know.”
“Well, that’s not good enough for me.”
“Clearly, I’m not either,” he mumbled.
“You’re trouble,” I whispered defensively. Which meant the smart thing to do was to stay far away from him…right?
I swallowed hard when his gaze narrowed. “You don’t even know me.”
“I’ve heard all about you.”
“Those are stories. Stories get lost in translation,” he said, sounding wiser than he should have.
“How old are you?” I blurted out. Not only was his voice deeper, I’d glimpsed the hair growing under hi
s pits earlier and on his arms and legs. Ever, Vaughn, and Jason, however, were still smooth.
“I’m twelve. How old are you?”
“Twelve. My birthday was two weeks ago.”
His gaze flickered, and he sounded almost grim when he said, “I’ll be thirteen in three weeks.”
I did the math and sucked in a breath. Jamie was nearly an entire year older than me. He was also older than Ever, but only by a couple of months, whereas eleven months separated Jamie and me. If I’d been intimidated before, it was nothing compared to the butterflies fluttering wildly in my tummy.
“So… you’re an eighth-grader?” It was the only thing I could think of to say. All my other thoughts were too embarrassing. I almost wished Jamie would turn away again so he couldn’t see the way my cheeks flushed.
“I will be when school starts.”
“Are you excited?” I asked as I toyed with the hem of my dress. I’d forgotten I was even wearing the monstrous thing. It no longer mattered. Nothing could ever make me feel more feminine than Jamie.
“About eighth grade?”
“Yes,” I answered breathlessly.
His eyes dipped, and I had the feeling he was staring at my lips. “I’m excited about a lot of things right now. School isn’t one of them.”
The ride chose that moment to start again, pulling me back into Jamie until our lips were dangerously close. I was breathing much harder now. So hard, I didn’t think I’d ever catch my breath.
“Are you okay?” he asked, brows furrowing.
“I-I-I can’t breathe. I need to get off.”
The Ferris wheel came to a stop shortly after, and Jamie was yanking the bar up before I could even get a good grip. I shoved past the crowd moving too slowly, trying to get away from Jamie. Unfortunately, it didn’t seem as if he was ready to let me out of his sight. I was bent over, gasping for my next breath when I felt him stand next to me.
“Are you afraid of heights or something?”
It wasn’t being high up that scared me. It had been the sudden feeling that I was falling. Even now, I still felt like I was tumbling down a never ending rabbit hole. Standing up straight, I met Jamie’s concerned gaze, and the feeling intensified.
He reached for me, and I stepped away.
“We should go find the guys.” I didn’t give him a chance to respond before heading in the direction I’d spotted the bumper cars.
Bumper cars had been the perfect stress reliever—and distraction. Ever and Jason had paired up and Jamie with Vaughn while I’d been like the golden snitch as they all chased me and my blessed lonesome around the track. The guys had pushed and shoved and shouted and cursed each other all the while I laughed until I cried as I dodged them.
By the time we were done, I could barely walk as the world tilted and spun. It was Jamie and Vaughn who eventually caught me, and Jamie had looked the most triumphant. I ignored the fluttering in my tummy as I made my way to the exit with them hot on my tail. Jamie had once again paid my admission when I’d once again forgotten to purchase tickets. It was beginning to feel like we were on a date, but I knew it couldn’t be further from the truth. I also refused to be one of those clueless, hopeless girls that Jamie seemed to like so much. In less than a week, he’d already seemed to rack up quite a few admirers. I’d even caught a few of them watching me with daggers in their eyes. Being the envy of other girls was a foreign experience, one I didn’t know how to deal with.
We played a few of the games to try to win prizes, and it was sidesplitting to watch the guys try and fail at the rope ladder. I lost count of how much cash they spent and how many times they toppled over before finally accepting that they weren’t exactly graceful enough to keep their balance on the angled ladder. Each one of them had tried the same strategy: racing to the top before the rope could tip them over.
I was bent over, holding my sides at the sight of Vaughn landing face-first into the bouncy rubber cushion for the third or fourth time. Ever and Jason were already waiting in line for another try while Jamie was noticeably silent as he stood much too close to me.
“Why don’t you give it a try? Show us how it’s done,” Jamie goaded with a grin. He then waved a few of his tickets, hoping to entice me, but something else had caught my eye. A few feet away, three girls stood next to a cotton candy stand, eyeing Jamie as if he was their favorite flavor. They all wore skin-tight shorts, tiny tops, and makeup. Too much makeup. I had the feeling they were a little older than me and maybe even Jamie, but I wondered if it was because of the face paint or the way they devoured him with their eyes.
Had Jamie noticed, or was he completely oblivious to the attention?
I started to tell him, hoping to tease him and make him blush as he’d unknowingly done to me so many times already, but then a streak of something hot speared my chest, and all I saw was green. I didn’t know what it meant, but it was enough for me to keep my mouth shut about his admirers.
“No, thanks,” I mumbled as I toyed with the hem of my dress. My mom would have a stroke if I fell and flashed the entire town my bum. Maybe that was why she’d forced me to wear a dress to a carnival. It had been her way of making sure I didn’t have too much fun. This dress felt heavier than a pair of iron shackles clamped around my wrists. I no longer blended with my crew and, instead, stuck out like a frilly pink thumb.
“It’s just a dress,” Jamie said, sensing the reason for my hesitation. “You’re still you underneath.”
“But you don’t even like me. Why would you care?”
“Summer isn’t over yet,” he replied, unmoved by my suspicious gaze. “There’s still time for you to change my mind.”
“Yeah, I’ll get right on that.”
How could he assume I’d give a crap if he liked me or not?
His only response was to press the tickets into my palm. I stared at the ladder, watching Ever and then Jason topple over for the fifth time. It’s just a dress, I thought, repeating Jamie’s claim in my head. I’m still me underneath. Vaughn was next in line, preparing to hand over his tickets when I cut him off at the front of line. The operator looked from me to Vaughn with wide eyes, waiting for him to blow up, but Vaughn only stood back and crossed his arms with a grin.
“It’s about time you got in the game, princess.” In a terrible Jamaican accent, Vaughn said, “I hope you’re feeling lucky, mon.”
They’d all been trying to win the five-foot banana with the dreadlocks, colorful beanie, and a creepy smile. I shuddered at the thought of waking up in the middle of the night and seeing that thing grinning at me through the dark.
After handing off the tickets, I moved to the bottom of the ladder and filled my lungs with as much air as I could before slowly exhaling. I had the urge to look over my shoulder. To see if Jamie was watching me.
I already knew he was.
Gripping the fifth rung, I started my climb, ignoring the boys’ strategy of going fast, and took it slow. But just like the boys, it wasn’t long before I topped over and landed on my back on the bouncy mat. Sitting up, I could see Vaughn, Ever, and Jason holding their sides while Jamie watched me with what could only be pride in his eyes. Determined, I rose up, making sure my dress stayed in place and got back in line after snatching the tickets Jamie held out for me. The second time, I made it a little farther, keeping my hands and feet on the outer edge and using the rope. I was only three or four rungs from the top when I landed face-first in the mat.
This time, when I rose to my feet, the boys weren’t laughing. They looked a little surprised and more than a little eager. I started for Jamie, ready to use every single one of his tickets if I had to, but Ever cut me off, offering up the last of his tickets. His golden gaze stirred the butterflies in my belly, and I was suddenly reminded of my crush and all the weeks I’d spent secretly pining over him. I still wasn’t sure when it began, but I knew then that it hadn’t ended. I’d just been so distracted by hating Jamie that Ever had faded into the background. I’d forgotten how handsome,
boyish, and kind Ever was. He’d certainly never pushed me down, chased me through the woods, or made me feel unwanted. I slowly accepted his tickets, trying my hardest not to blush, and when I turned for the ladder, my gaze somehow found Jamie’s.
His brown gaze, not as bright as Ever’s but somehow more magnetizing, never wavered. I knew then that he’d been watching me this entire time. His tantalizingly wide mouth had flattened with anger, making me think he’d read every single one of my thoughts, maybe even glimpsed my feelings for his cousin.
A moment later, I dismissed the thought.
How could he know when Ever himself hadn’t noticed?
Shaking off Jamie, my parents, and anything else that made me want to crawl into a ball, I got back in line. I didn’t dare turn to see if Jamie was still watching me. I waited five minutes before my turn came, and this time, when I gripped the ladder, I told myself nothing else mattered but ringing that damn bell.
I took my time just like my first try, kept to the edge as I had on my second, but this time, I made sure to alternate, keeping the opposite foot planted whenever my right or left hand reached for the rung above me. I blinked at my right hand in surprise when it actually gripped the top rung, but then the ladder suddenly wobbled even more aggressively than before, desperate to throw me off. As quick as I could, I lunged for the rope and rang the bell a mere second before I was tossed onto my ass. Lying on my back, I smiled up at the clear blue sky and the bright sun that seemed to return my smile.
I’d done it.
I lay there for a few seconds longer than necessary, listening to the round of applause and cheers, my friends’ being the loudest of them all.
“Hey, are you okay?” the pimply-faced operator asked as he came to stand over me.
My friends’ goofy grinning faces appeared above me next. Ever was the first to lean down, helping me stand. My gaze traveled the circle, searching for Jamie’s cocky handsome face, but he wasn’t there.
“Holy shit!” Vaughn shouted before grabbing me up in a bear hug. Trapped in his arms, he spun me around, and I gasped when my gaze landed on the shadowed seclusion behind the cotton candy stand. I’d only had a glimpse, but it had been more than enough. When Vaughn finally set me on my feet, my world spun for more reasons than one. “Shit, sorry,” he said, mistaking my distress. I felt like I’d been hit with a Mack truck, and I was sure I looked liked it, too.