Sarah’s eyes widened when she realized what he intended to do. Her hand shot out to cover his before he could unzip his pants.
“No, don’t,” she said in a high voice. She quickly wracked her brain, trying to remember exactly why she wanted to stop him. “I’m very angry at you.”
Cain took a step forward, flattening her against the wall. “Okay.”
She blinked up at him. Okay? What the hell did that mean? Lowering her hands to his chest, she pushed against him. He leaned back slightly, but otherwise stood his ground.
“Don’t push me away,” he said.
Sarah pushed at him again, this time with more force. “What does it matter? It’s not like it makes any difference. We both know I can’t stop you from doing whatever you want with my body.”
“Sarah… I’m sorry.”
“Don’t humor me with your apology,” she said, wrapping her arms around her chest. “If I leave you, I have to leave Snow and the other children. If I leave you, I can’t keep this baby. I’m the one who got screwed over, but you’re still holding all the cards.”
Cain’s hands came up to cup her cheeks. “It was never my intention to take you as my mate. I lost control.” She could see his eyes soften. “I should have been honest with you, and for that, I am sorry.”
He kissed her again, gently brushing his mouth across hers. Sarah’s lips trembled, and she squeezed her eyes shut in an effort to stem the flood of tears.
Pulling back, he said, “I am not sorry that you are my mate. I love you.”
Sarah opened her eyes, giving him a stricken look. Of all the cards she’d thought he might play, the “L” word hadn’t been one of them.
“You hurt me,” she said, her voice cracking.
“And if you will allow it, I will spend the rest of our lives making it up to you.”
* * *
Everything about his mate was more than Cain remembered. Her skin was softer. Her face, even contorted with sadness, was more beautiful than he remembered. Her scent, now laced with the subtle undertone of impending motherhood, was richer than ever.
He brushed his thumbs over the corners of her eyes, wiping away her tears. His fault. It was his fault that she was so distressed.
When she did not respond to him, Cain kissed her again, this time with no intention of stopping. He lifted her up, carrying her over to the nearest pile of furs. Coming down on top of her, his hands sought out the lush mounds of her breasts. He could feel her stiffened nipples under the cotton fabric of her gown, but her body still remained tense beneath him.
Still kneading one breast, he braced himself up on his free arm and drew his head back. “Stop resisting.”
He had meant the words as a command, but they came out as more of a plea. Cain was not in the habit of begging, but if there was ever something worth begging for, it was her.
Whether she saw this in his eyes, or she simply grew tired of fighting him, when Cain kissed her again, her body went lax. He felt a surge of triumph, followed immediately by a hard jolt of lust that shot down his spine and hardened his cock.
Not wanting to push her too quickly, Cain tried to focus on caressing and kissing his mate. It had been so long since he had been with her, and his patience was exceptionally thin. Soon he was thrusting his tongue into her, desperately mimicking what he wanted to be doing with his aching erection.
To his relief, his mate seemed equally pained. Her fingers fumbled with the zipper of his pants. She pulled his jeans down just far enough for his cock to spring free. Cain shuddered as she took him into her hand, stroking and squeezing him.
Kicking his boots off, Cain made quick work of his pants. The night air was cold on his skin, but it only made him all the more eager to bury himself in his mate’s warm body.
As he hiked up her gown, Sarah tensed again. In a breathy voice, she said, “Wait, what if someone comes in?”
Cain spread her legs, positioning himself outside her entrance. Heat radiated from her wet passage, making him groan.
He did not care if anyone saw them together. Cain thought that he said this aloud, but he wasn’t sure. As he sank himself into her, nothing else existed except the pleasure of being inside of her body.
Their days apart had made her tighter than before, and when he was fully inside of her Cain held still for a moment, marveling in the feel of her. Then, he began to move.
Cain held her in his arms, fighting to control the pace of his thrusts. His mate met him blow for blow, her quiet whimpers rapidly morphing into cries of ecstasy.
His sac growing taut, Cain knew that his release was imminent. Reaching between their sweat-slickened bodies, he pressed his thumb against the stiff nub of her sex, stroking it in fevered circles. His skilled fingers brought her to climax within seconds, and he felt a rush of pleasure and masculine pride as her inner walls convulsed around him.
For a moment, Cain felt too full, his cock swelling to the point of pain. Then he thrust again, pleasure exploding through his body as his release overtook him. His body spasmed as his seed burst from him, gushing into his mate in a torrent of heat.
As he collapsed on top of her, his head went to the crook of her neck, his animal instincts driving him to nuzzle at her throat. He nipped at the fragile flesh, resisting the primal urge to bite her. He did not need to mark her, not now. She was carrying his pup, and that was enough to satisfy the possessive wolf inside of him.
34
Sarah laughed as Cain disappeared under the furs. She swatted at the lump she presumed to be his head, but was too tired to put up any real resistance.
“At least let me wash up before…” Sarah trailed off as Cain stopped at her midsection.
She pulled back the furs, just enough so that she could see him press his ear to her abdomen. The sight triggered a kaleidoscope of emotions within her: love, happiness, excitement, and even a little fear.
They hadn’t by any means resolved what was between them, but for now she didn’t care. There would be plenty of time to deal with unpleasant matters later. This moment was too perfect to pass up.
“Can you hear it?” she asked, stroking his hair.
Sounding disappointed, he said, “I am not sure.”
“I’d be pretty impressed if you could. It’s only about five or six weeks old. Its heart is really tiny.”
Cain looked up, his eyes narrowed in scrutiny. “It has not been that long.”
Sarah rolled her eyes. “Doctors don’t measure how old a baby is by the date it was made.” She pointed at her belly. “You know, there was a lot going on in there before you came along.”
He seemed satisfied by her reply. Giving her a lazy grin, he said, “We are going to have a pup.”
Her heart fluttered. Feeling suddenly bashful, she looked away. “Well, we already sort of have one.” Her eyes widened and snapped back to Cain. “Oh, crap!”
“What is it?” he asked.
Sarah sat up, shooting him an apologetic look. “Caim. I got up because he wandered off again. I think he may have left the den.”
Frowning, he placed his hands on either side of her waist. “Go back and rest. I will worry about Caim.”
Sarah shook her head. “No, let me get my shoes, I’m going with you.” When Cain wouldn’t let her up, she scowled at him. “You and Caim are a package deal. If I’m going to be your mate—”
“You are my mate,” he interjected.
“Well, that also makes me Caim’s mother.” She felt silly adopting the title so brazenly, and immediately felt the need to explain herself. “Look, I know it’s strange and—”
Cain cut her off again, this time with a kiss. Drawing back, he said, “It is not strange. I think a mother is exactly what Caim needs.”
* * *
The winter nights were far colder than the mornings, and it wasn’t long before Sarah regretted not changing into something warmer. Cain had wrapped her favorite rabbit-skin pelt around her shoulders before they left, but the frigid wind still seem
ed to find its way up her gown.
Fortunately, Caim wasn’t very hard to track. No matter how sneaky the boy was, it was nearly impossible for him to disguise his trail in the snow. Cain and Sarah followed the small paw prints through the woods, to the hill that overlooked the river.
They stopped when Caim came into view. To Sarah, he was just a black smudge silhouetted against the moon. Her heart sank at the sight of him sitting alone in the snow. He was too young to be so troubled.
“Can I go?” she asked, nodding up at the hill where Caim sat.
He raised a questioning brow.
Sarah smiled reassuringly, and started up the hill. She walked slowly, careful to avoid any slippery rocks and hidden tree stumps. Halfway up, she glanced back to look for her mate, but he seemed to have faded into the shadowed rows of trees.
As she neared Caim, Sarah thought she saw the pup’s ear twitch, but he gave no other indication that he was aware of her presence. Making sure to give him a little space, she crouched down a few paces beside him.
“Hey, you,” she said. “Aren’t you cold out here?”
The wolf pup spared her a glance. Big though he was, the snow was deep and came nearly up to his chest. Sarah had the urge to pick him up and bundle him under her fur cloak, but she knew that Caim wasn’t a fan of being coddled.
Sensing that she might be there a little while, Sarah sat down, the snow crunching beneath her rear.
“I used to run away a lot when I was younger,” she said, resting her chin on her knees. “I was really good at it, too. One time, my aunt had to call the police. It took them almost a day to find me.”
Sarah stared off towards the river as she thought back to those days. Running away had been one of her many passive-aggressive means of coping with her lack of parents. Now she was beginning to understand how much stress she must have put on her aunt, an aunt who, despite Sarah’s best efforts to push her away, had loved her very much.
She probably thinks I just ran off again, she thought, remembering the fight they’d had before Sarah left. Her aunt had tried to warn Sarah not to go visit her mother, that nothing good could come of dredging up the past. Sarah hadn’t been sure how to explain to her aunt that for her, none of it was in the past. The loss of a parent was a wound that stayed with you forever, never able to fully heal.
Sarah hoped that someday soon, she’d be able to go back to town, if only just to send her aunt a postcard to let her know she was all right.
“I have been gone for much longer than that.”
Sarah was slightly startled to see Caim crouching next to her, but she recovered quickly. Surreptitiously, she removed her pelt and placed it over his small shoulders. He didn’t protest.
“Really, now?” she asked, securing the pelt in a knot under his chin.
Caim nodded his shaggy head. “Last summer, while my father was away, I left for almost three days.” His gaze shot up to hers. “But that is a secret between Hale and me.”
Sarah’s cheeks hurt with her effort not to grin. “I won’t tell.”
“My father is back,” he said, looking away again. “I can smell him on you.”
“He’s waiting for you at the foot of the hill.”
“Hn,” was his only reply.
Absently, she combed her fingers through his hair. “I never really liked running away, you know. It was fun for the first couple of hours, but after that, I missed being home, missed my family.”
He frowned. “Then why did you do it?”
She gave a slight shrug. “I guess for me, it was never about running away. I just loved being found.”
Caim considered her for a moment, his shrewd amber eyes taking her measure. Finally, he asked, “Can we see my father now?”
35
When she woke the next evening, Sarah stayed very still, so as not to throw up. She lay on her stomach, smiling as she watched the two wolves play.
Caim was tiny compared to his father, but it didn’t stop the tenacious pup from trying to wrestle Cain into submission. It was rare to see them both so at ease.
Sarah was glad she’d been able to have a private hour with Cain. After they arrived back with Caim, the alpha had been bombarded with a laundry list of issues that his pack mates had been stockpiling.
When it was finally time to go to sleep, Sarah had tucked Snow in with Lotus and Sable before eagerly heading for her room with Cain. When she got there, Cain had already fallen asleep, his son sprawled out beside him. A little disappointed, Sarah had settled down next to her mate.
To her surprise, Caim had gotten up then, circling the pallet twice before laying down in the narrow space between herself and his father. Sleeping next to Caim was pretty much like sleeping next to a big dog, but Sarah couldn’t remember the last time she’d slept so soundly.
Sarah took a deep breath through her nose, trying to dispel her nausea. The sound drew the attention of the wolves, and they both shifted to be at her side.
“Are you all right?” Cain asked, helping her to sit up.
“Just a little sick,” she said, brushing him off. “It’ll pass.”
Cain pulled her into his lap and began to rub her back. The gesture was sweet, so she didn’t tell him that the movement only made her feel sicker.
“Are you sick often?” he asked.
“Only when I wake up. And before I eat. And after I eat.”
Cain chuckled. “That is a good thing.”
“So everyone keeps telling me,” she grumbled, placing her head on his shoulder.
“Be careful,” Caim said, sitting down beside them. “She might throw up all over you. She did it to Sable.”
While Cain laughed, Sarah shot his son a disgruntled look. “I didn’t throw up all over her. It was just a little in her hair. Who even told you about that?”
“Lotus,” he snitched. “She is not a very good secret keeper.”
Sarah sighed, snuggling closer to Cain. “I’ll make a note of that.”
Before she could get too comfortable, Sarah heard a strange popping noise in the distance. She lifted her head as Cain’s posture stiffened. The sound was vaguely familiar to her, and her brows furrowed together as she tried to remember where she’d heard it before.
Abruptly, Cain stood, bringing Sarah up with him. “Get dressed,” he ordered. “Both of you.”
“What was that?” she asked.
She heard another popping noise, this one a little louder. In a moment of astounding optimism, her first thought was fireworks.
Gravely, Cain said, “That was a gun shot.”
* * *
“I want to go with you.”
Cain ignored his son’s protest, hoisting Caim onto Alder’s back with Snow and Sarah. All three of them were bundled up from head to toe, pelts serving as makeshift hoods to protect against the light flurries of snow.
After hearing the gunshots, Cain had quickly rounded up the wolves, ordering them to pack only what was essential. Only a few moments later, he led them all out the hidden back exit of the den.
“I do not want to wear this,” Caim huffed, tugging at his collar.
Patiently, Cain said, “I need you here with Sarah and your sister. Look after them for me, understood?”
His son instantly sobered, liking the idea of being in charge. Raising his chin, Caim replied, “Very well.”
Cain would have laughed, had their situation not been so dire. He looked to Sarah just in time to catch her smile. She was handling the situation remarkably well, but Cain suspected that beneath her calm façade she was just as anxious as the rest of them. He wished that he could reassure her, but there was no time.
Heading up the pack, Cain shifted, signaling to the others that it was time to depart. His wolves fell into a tight formation behind him, and he led them towards the river.
According to Hale, who had been on patrol, the shots had come from the east. There had been no more gunfire after the first two shots, and to Cain, the silence was foreboding.
Between getting medicine for Snow and taking a new mate, Cain had either been away from the pack, or otherwise unfocused on his duties as alpha. If he had been doing his job right, he would have known why there were humans encroaching on his territory and how best to protect his pack.
Instead, he was leading them blindly. With human soldiers having been spotted near his southern den and gunshots in the east, there were only two choices: north or west. The western mountain ranges were hotly contested and doubtlessly flooded with an influx of predators that’d had the sense to leave weeks ago.
It was not the first time Cain had moved his pack, and he doubted it would be the last, but this time, his decision seemed to matter so much more.
36
The sky was just beginning to lighten when the pack finally stopped to take a break. They had traveled all night, and Sarah was looking forward to getting some rest.
Yet another perk of werewolf children was that they were very quiet travellers. None of the kids spoke all night, except to alert an adult that they had to pee. They all seemed to sense the magnitude of the situation, and adjusted their behavior accordingly.
But by the time the pack stopped, most of the children were buzzing with pent-up energy. Not allowed to wander from the small campsite, they chased one another around in circles.
Shortly after they stopped, Cain came to check on her and Caim. There were dark circles under his eyes, and Sarah wanted badly to take him into her arms and make him rest. She urged him to stay, but he left to scout with Fern and his brothers anyway, promising to return within the hour.
As building a fire might have drawn attention, they all had to deal with the cold. Not quite as impervious to weather as her werewolf friends, Sarah wedged herself between Grace and Jewel, pretending to be interested in their conversation. She didn’t have to feign interest for long.
“Let’s hope no one raided the food provisions there,” Grace said, her lips flattening.
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