She walked down the hallway to the small bedroom that served as her office and slid the legal pad on the desk around to face her. She wrote slowly, choosing her words carefully. This would be the last words she could leave for Kelly. Jules made sure to tell her how much she loved her, and tried to explain why this was the only course of action. She told her everything she would need to know to get through the next few weeks. Then Jules folded the letter carefully and placed it in a legal sized envelope. She put her old tennis shoes on and left the apartment, not bothering to lock the door.
Jules drove for a while, not knowing exactly where she was going. She pondered all the different ways she could carry out her plan. She only knew it would have to be something she couldn’t walk away from, something permanent. She had considered just wrecking her car, running head on into a telephone pole. Or maybe she could just drive it into the sea. No, she didn’t want anything that she might survive. If she was going to meet Joe on the other side, she would have to make sure that whatever she decided to do, worked. The last thing she needed was to fail and be permanently disabled. If only she had a gun… Well it didn’t matter because she did not own a gun, nor would she even have any idea where to get one. As she drove east, the outline of the James H. Wheelin bridge materialized out of the dark sky. It spanned over a large inlet of the Atlantic, connecting the mainland to a small island. Jules thought there were some houses on the east side of the bridge, mostly a small fishing community. She looked for the exit that would take her there.
Jules pulled over just before the bridge and stepped out, taking in the night air. It was nearly midnight and the street was all but deserted. She pushed the car door shut and began walking. It was very chilly. Even though it was March, the temperature was barely above freezing. The cold was one thing she hadn’t fully considered when she moved from Nevada. I bet its seventy degrees there, she thought to herself. She shivered as she deliberately walked on the narrow sidewalk on the west side of the road. It led all the way across the huge suspension bride. She didn’t think people were supposed to walk on it for recreational purposes, just emergencies and road crew workers to do repairs. But this part of town was always quiet. There was little chance she would even see a car, and she doubted anyone who did see her would stop to ask questions.
The night air pierced through her sweater with unrelenting fury. Her skin was covered in goose bumps and she was shivering violently against the cold wind. The further over the water she walked, the stronger the wind seemed. It was as if it were trying to blow her back to her car. Not that it would work. Jules had made her decision and she was going to stick to it. She wondered who would find her, if anyone would at all. She was positive it would not be pretty. The fall alone would kill her. Even if she somehow managed to survive falling from that height, Jules couldn’t swim and would certainly drown. She shuddered at the thought of the marine life that lived in the swirling waters below. Just then, a car passed her. Its headlights glared in her eyes, and she involuntarily raised one hand to shield herself from it. It slowed a little when the driver saw her, but did not stop. Just as she had expected. She stopped short, realizing she was exactly where she wanted to be.
Dead center.
She made a quick glance around, to make sure she was in fact, alone, and then placed both hands on the rail separating her from the fall to the icy water below. Alone, she thought. Completely and utterly alone. She took one deep breath, and raised herself onto the concrete wall of the bridge. There was a railing above the concrete wall, and she managed to get her foot on top of it. Jules hoisted herself up.
As she stood there on the rail, she wondered how long it would be before they found her car. She thought back to the letter for Kelly, carefully placed in the driver’s seat. She hoped her daughter would understand. Jules looked up to the sky to see the stars once more. They were beautiful. The wind whipped around her, blowing her hair in every direction, but Jules didn’t really notice. She stepped up onto the top railing, holding on to the steel cables that supported the bridge. She studied the water below. It was what her father would have called “choppy.” The thousands of tiny waves danced together in an inviting little symphony. From this height, they didn’t seem very menacing. She briefly wondered if it would hurt. She didn’t care. It would be well worth the price to be with Joe. Jules longed for a release from the pain she had known all too well for the past eight months. She leaned out from the safety of her perch and lifted her right arm free and out to the side. She closed her eyes. How vividly she could still see his beautiful face! It was pure torture. Everywhere she looked she saw him. Everything made her think about him. Taking a deep breath, she imagined him by her side and all the fear was gone, leaving her with the knowledge that they would be together soon enough. She leaned out further, and then, let go. She was falling. The wind whipped past her face as she fell towards the waiting water below. She waited for what seemed forever for the impact with the water. She felt an incredible blow to her side and thought, this is it. But it was then that she realized that she was not wet. In fact, it felt more like she was flying…
CHAPTER ELEVEN
Nick was just wasting time, driving aimlessly around the city when he saw her car. He wasn’t particularly ready to go home, though he didn’t really have anything to do. He thought it was her car; a yellow Lumina that anyone could mistake for a taxi if it had a light on the roof. He followed at a distance until he was absolutely sure. He wondered what Jules was doing out this late.
She drove around the city, seemingly aimless as well. Nick had figured she was really sick today. He tried to call her at home, but received no answer. In fact, several people from the office tried to get a hold of her today; they didn’t have any luck either. He knew Jules had been feeling very sad lately, with good reason. He couldn’t imagine losing the love of his life. She didn’t talk about her late husband, and he didn’t ask. Nick tried to be a friend to her, to offer her all the support he could, but she always had a wall built up around her, not allowing anyone too close. She would talk freely to Anita and Nick, but only about business. She barely told them about her daughter, Kelly, and that was only because Kelly wanted to see her mother’s new office when she came to visit at Christmas.
Nick was strangely fascinated with her daughter as well. Even though their meeting was very brief he got the feeling that Kelly was very mature for her age. She was an old soul, as his father would say. She carried a wisdom in her eyes rarely seen in anyone so young. Of course, her spiky blonde hair and Metallica t-shirt gave proof to her real age. Still, there was an echo of the same grief her mother carried reflected in her daughter, although it was squashed down better than her mother’s.
Nick had tried once to ease Jules’s feelings of grief with his emotional abilities, but it didn’t work. He supposed some emotions were just too powerful to be manipulated. It was frustrating to him because he needed her. Every day he made sure to spend time with her. He had to for her own good and to calm his need to be around her.
Jules headed due east. He could see the bridge looming out of the night sky; the light foggy mist gave it an eerie appearance. He assumed she was going to the beach on the other side of the inlet. A lot of humans found the beach to be a very soothing place. All at once, Jules stopped her car just before the bridge, pulling over to the curb. He drove past slowly, careful not to scare her. He continued over the bridge, finding a good spot to wait for her to come across.
When, after several minutes, Jules hadn’t come, he drove back across the bridge to see if she had changed her mind. When he reached the half-way point, more or less, he saw her. She was walking on the narrow walkway. She raised her hand to shield her eyes from his headlights, and he was positive she couldn’t see him. This was illegal, but Nick was willing to bet she wasn’t aware of it. Or maybe... she was.
Anxiety began to flood his mind. His palms went slick and his heart beat faster than normal. Nick parked about half a mile from Jules’s car, got out and ran t
o the shoreline. He was sure she wouldn’t do anything stupid, that she just wanted to be alone, but he wanted to be able to see her, just in case.
And then, he did see her. That woman was going to be the death of him! What on earth was she thinking! She was standing on the top railing, right in the middle of the bridge. She was only holding on with one hand around a thick steel cable. Nick’s breath caught in his throat and before he could breathe normally again, she jumped.
She looked like a professional diver, the beauty and grace of her leap left him in awe. After only a fraction of a second, he was back in his right mind, and the reality of what was happening right in front of him hit like a ton of boulders, crushing him to his very core. NO! His mind was shouting, louder than if someone were screaming it in his ear. Nick didn’t think, he just acted. He took a running leap over the water with all the force he could manage. He slammed into her with crushing pain in his chest, wrapping his arms around her to support her. He landed nimbly on the east shore, not even pausing to catch his breath. What had he done? She couldn’t know he saved her. It would bring up too many questions. Did he really want to have to tell her what he was? Nick had spent a considerable amount of time on that subject in his own mind. He knew Jules was his mate but she had to come to it in her own mind, in her own time. She didn’t know he was a vampire and he didn’t think she would handle it very well at this point in time. As far as he knew, no one at the office knew. He didn’t want her to know. He ran her all the way back across the bridge, using his vampire speed, in less than one second, and sat her gently beside her car. He ran back toward his own car, but where he could still see her, before she had the opportunity to even realize what was going on. Nick hoped that he hadn’t hurt her when he caught her over the water. He only paused to whisper to her not to do it again.
CHAPTER TWELVE
Before she could wrap her brain around what was happening, Jules found herself sitting on the curb beside her car. What? How did she get there? “Please don’t do that again,” a whispered voice said in her ear. Jules whipped around to see who spoke the words, but whoever it was had disappeared. She was alone. Oh just great, I’m losing my damned mind! What just happened here? Didn’t she jump? She knew she had. She had felt the wind rushing past her, felt the exhilaration of falling. Angrily, she got up and went around her car. She peered through the driver’s side window and saw the letter for Kelly still lying on the seat. She had failed. It was a fail-proof plan, and she failed. Jules was furious. Couldn’t she do anything right? She briefly considered reclaiming her perch atop the bridge to try once more, but the memory of the voice she heard still buzzed in her ears. Jules thought she recognized it. She racked her brain trying to figure out who it belonged to. The answer tugged at the back of her memory, but she could not bring it to the forefront of her mind. The sound of it was melodic, almost mesmerizing, but too much had happened for her to get a clear memory.
She was completely beside herself with confusion. Bewildered, she got back in her car and drove home. She barely paid attention to the road, her mind was elsewhere. She must have played a thousand different scenarios in her head. There was no way she jumped from the bridge and then landed right back on the bridge. It just wasn’t possible. Maybe she only thought she jumped. Even though she felt the wind rushing across her face, she did have her eyes closed. Maybe she only imagined the feeling of falling. And who did that voice belong to? Her mind had to be playing tricks on her. Jules had heard stories of people who went insane after suffering a great loss. The idea of seeing a psychologist and getting some strong meds was beginning to seem like a fairly good one.
When she got home, the apartment was still unlocked, but no one had entered as far as she could tell. Jules made herself some tea and decided to check the fifteen voice mails that had accumulated over the past couple of days. Most of them were from people at work. Anita was worried and Harry needed to check something about one of his cases that Jules had taken over. Even Nick had called. He only asked that she call him back when she got the chance. There was a message from Andrew. He wanted to know how Jules was doing. She contemplated calling him back right away, but her better judgment stopped her. And tell him what, exactly? I tried to jump off a bridge and flew back to my car? Oh yeah, and I’m hearing voices?
Jules thought better of that. Besides, it was pushing two a.m. She would call in the morning.
That night, her dreams were surreal. She dreamed of falling, over and over. Each time she fell, an angel swooped down to save her. Jules woke even more confused than the night before. Could that be what happened? An angel? She didn’t know if she really believed in angels, but someone, or something, had definitely saved her. There was no doubt about that. Her mind was desperately trying to sort out the events of the night before. There was just no other possibility. An angel, she told herself. She wasn’t completely crazy, she assured herself, at least not about this. It wasn’t her time and a higher power intervened. She may have been unsure about her beliefs as far as angels went, but she did believe in a higher power. It was the only explanation that even came close to fitting. Jules surrendered then to being alive. No matter the pain, if this was how it had to be, she would live. Soon enough, she would be with Joe, but obviously, not today.
She picked up the phone and dialed Andrew’s phone number and waited while it rang. “Hello?” Andrew answered.
“Hey Andrew, it’s me, Jules. How are you?”
“Jules!” He sounded glad to hear her voice. “Where have you been? I have been trying to get in touch with you. I’ve been worried.”
“Don’t be silly, why would you be worried?”
“I just had this bad feeling, ya know? Like something bad was going to happen, and then, when you didn’t answer your phone, I got concerned. Silly, I know, but you know me. So how are things on your end?” Andrew had a better sense of intuition than he knew.
“Fine, I suppose. I work a lot.” It was the best generic answer she could give.
“You sound tired. Anything going on to keep you up at night?” The tone of his voice was playful and mischievous. Jules could almost see him wagging his eyebrows.
“I haven’t been sleeping well, bad dreams,” she told him.
‘Anything you want to share?” He asked. Why was he being so damned nice? Jules really didn’t want to discuss it.
“No, I don’t even remember most of the time,” she lied. They talked a few more minutes until Jules had to get ready for work. She was certain she would have a mountain of paperwork on her desk when she got there.
Andrew and Jules hung up, promising it wouldn’t be so long before they talked again.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
“Damn it Phoenix, why do you always have to be difficult?” Jolice was shouting as Nick entered his home. “I told you, I know who he is and where he is right now. I may not know tomorrow or the next day.”
“Woman, you could drive a monk to mass murder,” Phoenix grumbled as he plopped down on the couch with a soda can. “I ain’t going tonight.”
“Trouble in paradise?” Nick offered as he took off his coat.
“I found the fallen angel,” Jolice said with a stamp of her foot that made her crazy curls bounce. “I told this moron where to find him and he won’t go get him.”
“Well, where is he?” Nick asked.
“Texas.”
“Well, no wonder he doesn’t want to go tonight. That’s a good four hour flight ya know,” Nick offered with a wink to Phoenix. Then he turned to Jolice and added, “Besides, Phoenix is getting old. Who knows if his wings will even go that far.”
“You got a death wish boy?” Phoenix snarled. He leaned back and propped his feet up on the coffee table. “My shit is working just fine, thank you very much.”
“Hmph,” Jolice grunted. “Then get your old ass in gear and go get him before he moves on.”
“Fine,” Phoenix snapped. “But only because I know I won’t get a moments peace until I do.”
“I feel ya man,” Nick added, “she can be very…. Er… persistent.”
Phoenix leapt off the couch and stormed out of the house. They could still hear his litany of curse words as he shot up into the sky on his fetching mission. Seriously? Who did that little woman think she was anyway? He was not her lap dog and he didn’t play fetch. So what if this so called angel was boozing it up in a bar in Texas? He could hardly see how a drunken angel was going to help on this massive mission of who the hell knows what that Jolice kept reminding them was coming.
He didn’t really know if he believed her or not, but she hadn’t been wrong yet. Even though she was a bit irritating, Phoenix knew her intentions were good. Still, why did he have to go get him? Since he is the only one who can fly undetected across several states in just a few hours, that’s why.
He flew at high speed most of the way, hardly looking down since it was dark anyway and there was nothing to see. He made sure to keep his speed fast but just under the point where his wings would flame and attract attention. Any number of stories about shooting stars could be blamed on him over the years. Besides, he didn’t know exactly how long he had until his wings went completely bald.
Nick had been right, he was getting old.
But that was something to worry about later. He soared across the sky, hell bent on his mission. Get the damned angel and get back. The faster he could make little miss know it all happy, the faster she would leave.
Four hours later he was crossing into Texas. He had no trouble finding the little hole in the wall bar Jolice described. He landed softly behind the building and tucked his wings under his coat. It wasn’t hard to spot the angel once he got inside. The place was basically deserted and the man sitting at the bar fit Jolice’s description perfectly. Dark hair? Check. Tall? Check. Drunk as a skunk and sitting at a bar? Check. Sitting was a bad verb. He was hunched over the bar and drooling on his hand.
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