Feeling Wyatt’s hand embracing hers gave her some much-needed reassurance. “I think I am,” whispered Nev. She was still working to come to terms with what it meant to have someone know the truth about her.
“You know… I believe you. About all of it. Also, I still want to help you, if you’ll let me,” Wyatt added softly.
Nev pulled her hand from his and stood up to look at him. “Why?” she asked, sounding dubious.
He watched as she paced slowly back and forth with her head down. “Because,” he started to reply before she cut him off.
Nev felt herself growing more and more upset. Her hands started trembling, and her pacing grew more and more frantic. “No, you can’t. You just can’t. Either you should think I am a liar or—even better—crazy. Or… or you should believe me and realize I am not worth the risk. I have never been worthy of it,” she said, her eyes swelling with tears.
Wyatt laughed briefly and replied, “A liar, no. Crazy though? The cave swim may have sealed my judgment on that.”
Nev scowled at him and then returned to her pacing. Her agitation grew with each and every step.
Wyatt, realizing he had only made her more upset, moved to intercede her pacing and placed a hand tenderly on her cheek. “You’re wrong, you know. You are worth it,” he said sincerely.
His words fell upon her heart and with them a sense of serenity. Listen to your heart, Nev thought, remembering her father’s words. Nev closed her eyes and took a deep breath before looking up at Wyatt. His sandy blonde hair was dry and full of the curls she had grown so fond of. She pushed a bit of his hair back from his eyes and nodded slightly at him. She found herself desperately wanting what he said to be true. Yet, after being alone for so long, she didn’t dare let herself believe it. “Are you sure? It’s not too late for you to walk away,” she whispered shakily.
Wyatt pulled her face gently towards his until there was only a hint of space between them. “I am quite sure,” he said, smiling warmly and savoring the sensation of her breath on his skin. The desire to kiss her built within him, but this time he wanted it to be her decision. It was clear to him that so much in her life had been decided for her. He wanted her to, at least, have control over this. She deserved to finally have a choice in something, and Wyatt was determined to provide as many opportunities for that as he could.
The late morning air was cool, but she felt her skin warming despite this. The walls she had built that last night of her childhood began to crack and crumble. She may be making a mistake, but the pain and the loneliness had become almost unbearable. Nev found herself feeling desperate to be touched, and she didn’t have the strength to deny it. This time she would let her walls fall. This time she would allow herself to be vulnerable—at least for a while.
She let her lips brush lightly against his and felt him wrap his arms around her waist in response. She breathed in deeply as he pulled her close. Placing her hand on the back of his neck, Nev’s fingers swiftly moved to play with a curl of his hair. The anticipation of feeling his lips against hers caused her breath to flutter. Still, he hovered just beyond her. A building sense of energy and warmth swirled through her, as it quickly began to reach a crescendo. Finally, she was unable to resist her desperate yearning for his touch. She leaned into him and kissed him passionately as her fingers rapidly abandoned his curls, and she pulled him into her kiss.
Wyatt eagerly met her increasing desire with his own. He moved one hand between her shoulder blades and pulled her deeper into his embrace. He slid his other hand down her back before stopping at her waist. His fingers slipped just below the small of her back and under her tucked shirt. Her skin felt warm and soft as his fingers traced light patterns upon it.
Nev’s breath quickened, and her need for his touch became an insatiable hunger. She was unsure of how to sate it, but she was not going to let her anxiety be a wall. Not this time. She could feel his hand slide slightly farther down her back, and it caused her to whimper softly with anticipation and a sense of uncertainty.
Wyatt pulled back from her, leaving only a hint of space between them. Gazing into her eyes deeply, he became utterly enraptured. They were like mysterious pools, beckoning him towards them. Powerless against their draw, he found himself wanting to touch, taste, and revel in her body. He realized if they went much farther, however, stopping would become increasingly unpleasant. Perhaps for them both. Despite wanting to fully be with her, he couldn’t live with wondering. It couldn’t be like it had after their first kiss. Beyond needing to feel certain, he also would never be able to live with knowing that he’d caused her pain. He needed to know she was sure she wanted this. All of this.
Nev looked at him with growing concern. “Did I do something wrong?” she asked, feeling uncertain and worried.
“Wrong? No, definitely not. I just… well, I want to make sure you want this. If you don’t… it’s okay. I’m going to help you, regardless of anything else,” he assured softly.
Nev thought for a moment. “I do. I’m tired of being alone, and I want this. I want you. It’s just that I… have never. Well, I have just never,” she replied, feeling suddenly embarrassed.
Wyatt grinned as he pulled her close, “No worries. Truly.” He kissed her lightly on the lips. Smiling at her, he said, “You really are a beautiful and amazing woman. And I don’t think you yet realize the effect you have on me. Heck, I am only starting to realize it myself.”
Nev flashed a smile at him and giggled for a moment.
Wyatt pulled her close and kissed her again. “You know that is the first time I have ever heard you laugh? I shall happily endeavor to hear that again and again,” he noted, smiling. “So, my lady, care to join me in my humble abode?” he asked while beckoning towards the cave.
Nev shook her head in approval, feeling a strange mixture of excitement and apprehension.
“Hmm, it occurs to me that I have been wrong about something,” Wyatt said, smiling mischievously. “It seems you can simply shake that gorgeous head at me and get me to do what you want.” Wyatt took her hand in his and led her towards the cave entrance.
Nev’s breath quickened as her desire and anxiety battled within her. A small gasp escaped her lips as Wyatt gently dragged her down onto the ground with him. When he pulled her close, she felt light-headed, and her muscles momentarily tensed.
Wyatt chuckled softly. “Just breathe,” he reminded her gently. He ran a hand down her back as his other hand cupped her face in his palm. “It’s okay if you want to change your mind,” he offered warmly.
Taking in a deep breath, she shook her head in disapproval. “No, I don’t want to change my mind. I just… I feel like I might make a mistake,” she replied tentatively.
He kissed her deeply and pulled her body flush to his. His hands wandered her curves briefly before leaning back and smiling at her. “That, my dear, is an impossibility. So, no more worrying about that. Okay?” he insisted sweetly.
Nev smiled at him in response. “Okay, I’ll try,” she replied. With her mind and body now more at ease, she allowed herself to let go of her fears and grasp onto her desire for Wyatt instead.
Feeling her body relax and her fingers pulling at him, Wyatt kissed her tenderly. For the next few hours, she was the only thing in the world that existed for him. With her walls lowered, he could sense even more of her. Wyatt responded almost instantly to how and where she wanted to be touched. He caressed her body with gentle and affectionate touches. Savoring every moment, he pushed her slowly through waves of building pleasure. Only after he was confident she was fully ready did he nudge her over the edge of her desire. The sounds of her soft moans and whimpers as she reached her climax, swiftly threw him over his own passionate precipice.
Chapter 15
Nev woke slowly and saw that dawn had just barely arrived. They had spent several tender and intimate hours together before finally falling into a deep and satisfying sleep while nestled in each other’s embrace. Still snuggling close to him, she
savored the feeling of his body pressed against hers. As they cuddled, she traced a lazy path through his chest hair with one of her fingers. This hair was blonde and curly as well, but not quite as soft as the locks on his head.
Wyatt let out a soft moan as her touch beckoned him to wake. He kept his eyes closed, relishing the feel of her finger lightly tracing patterns on his chest. The sensation of her lips gently kissing along the same path, however, was much, much harder to ignore. “I hope you know what you are doing,” he whispered, while still pretending to sleep.
Nev smiled and began lightly kissing up to his neck. She felt one of his hands slide down her back before coming to rest on the small of her back. The sensation of his touch caused her breath to tremble.
Wyatt, with his eyes still closed, slowly turned over onto his back. He then gently urged Nev to move on top of him.
Nev’s pulse and breath quickened as she could feel his body beneath her, smiling she leaned down and kissed his face, drawing slowly closer to his lips.
Wyatt opened his eyes and said with a grin, “And here I was convinced you were not a morning person.”
Nev sat up and giggled softly before replying, “I’m not.”
“I see,” he said, raising an eyebrow and laughing. He then ran a hand lightly down Nev’s chest, watching with glee as she squirmed under his touch.
Nev giggled as Wyatt’s fingers now traced faint lines along her chest.
“Wow, that giggle of yours. I probably shouldn’t be telling you this, but it renders me completely powerless to resist you,” Wyatt admitted, grinning. He wrapped his arms around her waist, pulled her body against his, and kissed her deeply.
Nev’s life had been spent so devoid of people and any meaningful interactions. Now suddenly, with Wyatt, she found herself craving him and his touch. It was an unfamiliar need for her, and one Wyatt seemed happy to fulfill. She smiled at the ease of being with him and found herself daring to let hope tip-toe back into her life. Still smiling, she kissed him tenderly before pulling him into her.
Wyatt let out a soft moan and met her craving with his own. He could feel the connection between them growing and realized, somewhere over their journey, he had truly fallen for her. Wyatt had all but given up on the thought of that for him, but here he had found it with this gorgeous, complicated, and amazing woman. The idea was crazy, he knew it. To feel so deeply for someone he had known for such a brief amount of time shouldn’t be possible. But it was. He pulled her closer to him until their bodies moved as one. Pressing his lips to hers, he kissed her deeply before whispering in her ear, “I love you.”
Nev heard his words as a surge of energy washed over her, and she collapsed into his embrace with a gentle moan. Feeling content, she laid quietly with her eyes closed and listened to Wyatt’s ragged breath return to normal. Eventually, the thought that they needed to head out and make up for lost time began to nag at her. She would miss the way things were in their cave. Things were simpler here and now. There was no destiny to be fulfilled, no prowlers to evade, and her bad memories seemed much more distant. Nev let out a soft sigh before sitting up. “We should probably get going,” she said reluctantly.
Wyatt sat up next to Nev and watched her as she started to get dressed and packed. The words he had whispered in her ear hung heavy in his mind now. He didn’t regret saying them, but he was feeling increasingly anxious about her lack of response. He knew, however, trying to stop her from getting ready to leave would only cause her stress. So, for now, he followed suit.
“Wait,” he said softly, as they both exited the cave.
“Wyatt, I wish we could stay longer too. But we can’t. We really have to go. It isn’t safe to stay in one place very long,” she said, pausing only a moment before continuing to check to see that all of her belongings were secure.
“I know. And we will. Just give me a moment,” Wyatt said, almost pleading.
Nev acquiesced and turned to look at him. “Alright, but just a moment,” she replied.
“I, well… I just wanted to know if you… well… if you,” stammered Wyatt, stumbling over his words.
Nev frowned a bit. “Maybe we should talk about whatever it is later,” she suggested gently.
A wave of panic swept over Wyatt. “No!” he blurted out as he took her hands in his.
Looking concerned, Nev asked, “What is it?”
“I meant it, you know,” he said softly. Wyatt squeezed her hands gently and looked up at her. “I have never said it… much less said it and meant it. Not to anyone besides my parents and Addi anyway, and that is different,” he stated, sounding and looking truly sincere.
Nev didn’t know how to respond. She had already convinced herself that she’d either misheard him or he’d simply gotten caught up in the moment. She looked at him with a puzzled look on her face.
Wyatt sighed and said, “Look, I wasn’t trying to put you on the spot. I just needed you to know that for me anyway, that is how I feel. I think you are amazing, and being with you was… is wonderful. And before you say it—I know we haven’t known each other very long. And most of our time has been spent in crazy and dangerous situations. Yet, it doesn’t make what I feel for you any less real. Anyway, I just needed you to know that before we headed out again.”
She felt him squeeze her hands one more time before releasing them and giving her a half-smile. “Wyatt, I…,” she said before her voice trailed off.
“No worries, remember,” Wyatt said, before giving her a wink and a smile. He then turned and started walking west. “Better catch up and oh, be on the lookout for more caves. I had no idea they could be so exhilarating,” he shouted back at her, with a laugh.
Nev felt herself blush and then grin for a moment. The time she had spent with him had been wonderful. She wanted to tell him that. She wanted to tell him how she felt, but she didn’t. Instead, Nev shook her head and quickened her pace until she was just a few steps behind him. “You are such a fool. He deserves better,” she berated herself, under her breath.
Chapter 16
They walked for several hours in the rain without incident and without conversation. Wyatt began to wonder if this was how their relationship was doomed to be. Brief and wonderful moments of tender intimacy bookended by long stretches of awkward and painful silence. The thought was disheartening, to say the least. Desperately he wanted to push her to say she either loved him back or that she didn’t. Even so, he simply couldn’t.
Her life had been filled with enough hardships, and he was determined not to add to it. Guilt was already plaguing him for making her face and deal with his feelings for her. The very least he could do was not add any more difficulty to her life. If he truly loved her, then he should protect her. Even if that meant protecting her from him and his feelings for her.
They were only a day or two from Birclan, and dusk was approaching fast. Wyatt had been taking point for the last several hours, walking due west and in the dreary rain as Nev felt her mood darken to match the sky. She had increasingly become lost deep in thought the longer they walked. Oblivious to everything around her except for Wyatt, she kept her vision solely focused on him.
She had no experience in dealing with relationships. Almost all of her life, she had actively avoided forming any attachment to anyone. Her worry about how she was handling her feelings for Wyatt ate at her. The more she thought about it, the more she became certain she was making a mess of things. Part of her even toyed with the idea that it would best if things between them stopped progressing—despite her desperately hoping he didn’t feel the same way. Her time with him had been more wondrous than she could’ve imagined, and she cared about him, maybe even loved him. Still, she worried about the danger she would continue to bring into his life. The dilemma left her head and heart aching. Abruptly, he stopped moving several feet ahead of her. Hearing her name, she looked up at him as she was yanked from her thoughts.
“Well, this cabin has seen better days. Still, the walls and roof seem surpr
isingly intact. Maybe we should spend the night here?” he inquired, examining the door to the cabin. “Nev? What do you think?”
Nev looked up and suddenly felt like she had been hit by a boulder. Shuddering, she collapsed into the muddy ground. She could hear Wyatt’s worried voice, but it felt distant and muffled. Tears immediately rolled down her cheeks as she lay crumpled in the mud. “I promised,” she repeated over and over.
Wyatt was panicked and knelt beside her. “Nev, what is it?” he pleaded. He was brushing the hair back from her face and trying to judge what had happened.
Nev shook her head violently and looked up at Wyatt. “I promised, and I broke it… again,” she said, tears streaming from her eyes.
Wyatt wiped some of the mud from her face. “Promised what?” he asked, feeling his concern grow by the moment.
“I promised I would never come back,” she said, her voice trembling.
The sudden realization of what she meant came crashing down on Wyatt. Of all the cabins in all the world, he had inadvertently led her to her childhood cabin. No matter how much I want to protect you, you still keep getting hurt, he scolded, feeling aggravated with himself. He scooped her up into his arms and carried her until the cabin was out of sight. As he walked with Nev in his arms, he could feel her crying quietly against his shoulder.
Nev kept her eyes closed tight as she felt Wyatt pick her up and move her some distance. She felt like her soul was breaking, and she was powerless to stop it. Tearfully she pressed her face against Wyatt’s shoulder. I promised, she repeated over and over.
As the rain stopped, Wyatt came to the edge of a large, clear puddle. Gently he sat Nev down beside it and then pulled the sash from his belt. Rinsing it out in the pool’s clean water, he began to tenderly wipe the mud from Nev’s face.
Nev had stopped crying and was just sniffling at this point. Her gaze, locked and lost, staring out past Wyatt and towards ghosts from her past. She felt Wyatt cleaning her face, but the sensation was dulled. It was as if her entire body had gone numb all at once.
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