by Lara Swann
My laugh deepens as I find myself enjoying this little exchange - the life and humor in this small woman - in a weird way that I haven’t for a while. I stand there for a moment, hesitating as the urge to invite her in for a glass of it almost overwhelms me. It seems like the sort of thing people around here would do - and I know that if I don’t have someone to share it with, I’ll take it inside, put it away and won’t allow myself to touch it, which just seems too ungrateful and awkward.
Except that I’ve still got to wrestle Maya to bed, and I don’t know whether Kelsey might take the invitation the wrong way—
“Daddy!” Maya calls out, and I can hear her scampering into the hallway. “Who is it?!”
She must have gotten bored with the coloring and being left out of whatever is going on.
“Oh, shit—I mean—shoot!” Kelsey glances behind me and then gives me an embarrassed look. “I’m so sorry, this is a terrible time to stop by when you must be in the middle of getting Maya to bed—I mean, I didn’t realize it was you here, but still—”
“It’s fine, you didn’t interrupt anything.” I say, even though she did a little bit.
I really don’t mind, and I’m even a little surprised at the significance she gives to Maya’s bedtime. It’s something I’d only really expect from other people with children. Then again, maybe she does? I wouldn’t have guessed it, but it suddenly occurs to me that I know very little about her at all.
“Daddy? Is it—”
“It’s Kelsey.” I say, glancing over my shoulder before she can say something like the fairy woman or ask about marriage all over again. “From the cupcake store this morning.”
“Oh—hi, Kelsey!” Maya runs up next to me, wrapping her arm around my leg and leaning against me, halfway between exuberant and shy in that way only my little girl can be.
“Hi Maya.” Kelsey smiles warmly down at her.
“Why are you here?” She asks, eagerly curious.
“Maya…” I murmur.
I love her curiosity - when it’s not driving me crazy - but she’s getting to the age that I wonder whether I should be making more effort with her manners. I think I just want to hold onto that phase of childish innocence where she does feel free to say the first thing that comes into her head, for as long as possible. The things she comes out with sometimes are just mind-blowing.
“I live next door.” Kelsey says again, pointing to her house. “I just came to say hello, since you’re new here, but I didn’t mean to interrupt your time with your Daddy.”
“Oh, I don’t mind.”
Of course you don’t, I think wryly.
I squeeze her shoulder. “I’ll just be another minute, okay sweetie? Do you think you can be really good for me and go choose the book you want me to read tonight, while I finish talking to Kelsey?”
It’s always my biggest, most convincing argument for bedtime and it’s a risk bringing it out this early, but in a situation like this I feel like I have to pull out the big guns.
“But…” Maya looks between us again, and I get ready for the objection, but then she just sighs. “Ohhh okay then, Daddy.”
I can’t help the rise in my eyebrows as she waves at Kelsey.
“Nice to see you, Kelsey!”
“You too, Maya.” Kelsey smiles at her, and I’m not sure what just happened. It’s never that easy.
I don’t miss the extra glance Maya darts between Kelsey and I, either, and I can’t help wondering what’s going on in her mind. My stomach roils a little more as I really hope I don’t get any more questions about marriage tonight. It’s Friday. It’s been a long week - and a long day.
Just give me one night. One easy night, please.
“Sorry.” Kelsey says again, looking a little sheepish.
“Don’t be.” I say, with a smile. A slightly more tired smile, but still one that I mean. “It was great of you to stop by.”
She nods. “It’s no problem - and I’ll get out of your hair. Feel free to stop by if you need anything, though. Directions around town, a cup of tea, sugar—”
She cuts herself off, then laughs again. “Though I’d guess you have plenty of sugar already.”
That makes me smile. “I might have that one covered.”
“Okay then, I’ll come to you if I have any need of it.” She says with a grin, giving me a little wave and stepping back off the porch.
I watch Kelsey walk back to her own house for a moment before turning back to look for my daughter, slightly relieved that she didn’t seem to expect an invitation inside - or anything else, for that matter.
And a little disappointed, too.
Chapter Three
Kelsey
“So tell us all about it - how was the vacation?” Mom says, as she comes around from behind and places another bowl of chips and dip on the wooden table in the backyard.
When I agreed to spending Saturday catching up with my parents, I thought it would only be a few of us here - and maybe a chance to see some of the little ones too - but I should have guessed the whole family would end up stopping by and one point or another to join in. By the time Elizabeth got here with her three kids, it was already feeling a little cramped inside the house, and we all ended up spilling out here.
Then someone got the wading pool out and now Mark’s girls - Katy and Lily - are splashing around with their five-year-old cousin Amy, Jackson is running around the yard wearing only a top and shrieking at the top of his voice, Elizabeth is bouncing little Kieran on her knee as she helps herself to dip and the idea is that we might finally have all the children occupied enough for me to actually talk about my vacation.
Probably only for five minutes, but you take small wins when you can.
“Amazing.” I say with a contented sigh, as I lean back against the chair and take a sip of my ice-cool lemonade.
I’ll give her that, Mom always knows how to throw a party. Even one she wasn’t exactly intending to have - but then, that’s the way it’s always worked with us. Once one or two of us come around, everyone wants to be there.
“Europe was…unbelievable. Everything there was just so…old, and…different…you’d travel four hundred miles, from France to Italy, and everything would change. I could have spent a year there, just wandering around. Two. Three. Hell, my whole life, and I’m not sure I’d explore everything it has to offer. I didn’t even go to half the countries I’d planned to, I got so lost in the little towns in Southern France and Italy. Even these tiny little communities, they have buildings and churches and monuments that are ancient…” I shake my head, still feeling in awe at it all.
“Aww, a year? Don’t tell us you’re thinking of packing up everything here for good.” Elizabeth, my older sister, nudges me with a gentle smile.
“Nah.” I shake my head. “That’s one thing I did work out while I was out there - as much as I like the idea of it, I really do start missing home too much to want to disappear for too long.”
“Ohh?” Mark raises an eyebrow at me, his voice faintly surprised and I give him a soft smile.
I’ve always been the flighty one in the family. When I was eighteen and insisting on backpacking around Brazil alone for a couple of weeks, it gave Mom minor heart attacks on a fairly regular basis, but by now everyone’s gotten used to it - they even expect it from me, I think.
“Yeah - I don’t want to miss out on everything you’re all up to, these impromptu family gatherings, or watching all the kids grow up…maybe when they’re older, I don’t know, but for now…this is where I want to be.”
“You have no idea how pleased I am to hear that.” Mom says, squeezing my shoulder as she moves around behind me. She’s still walking around, topping up snacks and checking on drinks. I really wish she’d just sit down and relax with the rest of us, but most of the time, it’s impossible to convince her that nothing needs doing right now.
“I think I have some idea.” I say, giving her an amused glance, before shrugging. “Besides all that, I ran
out of funds pretty quick. Europe’s expensive.”
Naomi, my younger sister, laughs beside me. “Now we hear the real reason.”
“Hey, got to win you all over with the sentimental stuff first.” I grin, then tilt my head at Mark. “Maybe after all that heartfelt feeling, you’ll let me ride that motorcycle I’ve got my eye on.”
“No way.” He laughs. “That thing is my pride and joy, and after you crashed the last one—”
“It was a minor scratch! And you have dozens more in the shop—”
“They’re for sale, not riding!”
“I really wish none of you would tear about on—” Mom starts.
“Pride and joy, hey?” Jenny, Mark’s wife, nudges him with a pointed look.
“After the kids, I mean.” He amends, which makes me laugh, trying not to sputter on the sip of lemonade I’ve just taken.
“So, does that mean you managed to clear your head a little too, honey?” Mom says, obviously trying to turn the conversation back to me.
That’s the problem when everyone gets together - whatever you initially wanted to do or catch up on inevitably gets sidetracked - and I know she really does want to hear about the vacation. And me. Not that I’d mind everyone getting a little sidetracked from what she’s really asking about.
“Yeah.” I say, giving her a reassuring smile. “It was really good to get away for a while. What I needed, really.”
She smiles back, letting out a small breath and looking relieved.
“Good. I’m so glad you could, sweetie - and believe me, you didn’t miss anything here.” Her mouth twists with the kind of disapproval that rarely crosses her expression - pretty much only when someone has done something to one of her family. Then she gets all mama-bear about it.
I shrug. “I don’t mind - really.”
It doesn’t matter if it was the engagement party of a lifetime. It’s done, and I’m okay with it all now.
Or at least, I would be if everyone didn’t keep getting all riled up about it.
“Well, good.” She says, coming out of her private distaste as she focuses back on me with a smile. “So does all this talk of sticking around mean that you’re ready to think about really settling down here again? Now that you’ve put all that other unpleasantness behind you.”
“Still think that wasn’t right.” Mark mutters, always the protective older brother, even when I’d rather he wasn’t.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s nice to have the support and to know my family will always be there for me - but I just wish everyone would forget all about it now.
“Settling down?” I raise an eyebrow at Mom, ignoring Mark’s comment and giving her a wry smile. “And just what does that mean, hm?”
Not that I don’t already know. Now that Naomi is happily married, I’m the last one left - which means I get all the attention. Unless I convince her otherwise.
“All I’m saying, is there are lots of other lovely boys in Ashton - and actually, just the other day, Robert was asking how you were—”
“Mom.” I groan.
Already? I’d been hoping to head her off before she could start any of that.
“What? It doesn’t hurt to—”
“Nope, sorry.” I shake my head. “I promise you, I have no interest in that anymore. I had a lot of time to think about it while I was traveling - and I wanted to say, I realized something. I’m perfectly content with the way my life is now. I love you all - and my nieces and nephews - my job and this amazing little town. I’ve got endless opportunities and anytime I feel like it, I can pick myself up and disappear to some distant part of the world. I can do whatever I want now - and I have no intentions of changing any of that. Not for the world.”
As it comes up, I get more emphatic - and I’m not sure I intended it to come across so passionately, but it’s something I’ve been thinking about for a while now and the more I think about it, the more right it feels.
“But—”
“No buts, really.” I say. “I’m happy.”
Mom lets out a long breath. “I know you are, sweetie, and I’m glad - but what about…everything else? I know you love your freedom, but having a family is a big part of life too, I don’t want you to miss out on—”
“I have a family.” I point out, then gesture with a fond glance at the children still racing around the wading pool. “I’ve got kids - we’ve got them. How could I possibly need more than that? And c’mon, aren’t you exhausted enough with five grandchildren? Not to mention the ones I’m sure Naomi will be bringing along soon enough. I’m sure she’s got a plan for that.”
I give my younger sister an affectionate smile and I’m surprised to see the faint blush on her cheeks.
Okay, yeah, she’s definitely thinking about it.
Naomi has always been the most organized of all of us - that’s why at twenty-five, she’s already married and living with her husband, while at that age I was still spending my time finding any excuse to leave Ashton and living at home while I dated off-again-on-again Tyson. Sure, at the moment she’s busy being all moon-eyed and in-love with her new husband, but I’m sure she’s got it all worked out.
I mean, I did try doing the timelines-and-plans thing. It just didn’t work out that well for me.
“Besides.” I add. “I’m thirty now - probably about time to admit I have missed the boat. Tyson strung me along for long enough that all the decent guys in Ashton - who don’t feel too much like brothers to date - are already taken. It’s a pretty small town.”
I’ve come to terms with it, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t true.
“Not all of them.” Elizabeth suddenly interjects, with a wicked smile as she looks up from where she was singing softly to Jackson.
“Oh yes.” Mom adds, her own eyes lighting up, and I have a sudden feeling I know where this is about to go. “You might not have realized since you’ve been back, but we do get new people arriving in town every now and then.”
“I’ve already met the cupcake man.” I say, before they can get too carried away with this. “He seems like a great guy - but that doesn’t change anything.”
Cupcake man. Yes, I’ve met the cupcake man, cupcake man, cupcake man…
Now why do I have the muffin man theme running through my head?
“…interested!”
I have to stop myself from laughing at that, and I miss most of what Jenny says.
“Sorry, what was that?”
“I was just saying—I think you’re the only one I know who’s said that. Most of the town are interested!”
“Yeah. I’ve noticed that.” Mark says, which only makes her laugh.
“Exactly.” I say at the same time, but I don’t mind when it gets lost in Mark’s response.
I have no interest in that kind of competition - or a man with all that interest swirling around him.
Tyson was always one of the town’s golden boys and all the girls that flirted with him, however innocent it was, made it far too easy for him to start making suggestions or giving me guidance on how maybe I could be more like them. Then, eventually, I guess all those options become too tempting and he left me for someone who was already different.
It’s weird how, looking back, it’s so much easier to see the things that were wrong between us than it was at the time. I never thought anything of that kind of behavior back then, but now that I think about it, it was a little bit fucked up.
So yeah, a charming guy like Liam, who could probably have his pick of the single women in town?
I’m not even going to waste my time thinking about it. I’ve just got to the point where I actually feel happy to be alone - why throw all that away to dive into a drama that’s bound to go wrong?
“Hey, you can’t blame me.” Jenny says, throwing one arm around Mark’s shoulder and smiling sweetly at him. “A sweet-talking ex-military man, with the body to match? Anybody would take notice.”
Jenny always did have a thing for the bad boy types, I gues
s. That’s why she ended up with a motorbike enthusiast like Mark.
Wait—
“Ex-military?”
“Yeah.” Elizabeth nods. “Haven’t you noticed? A stone-chiseled body like that, walking with a limp…got to be.”
A limp?
No, I guess I didn’t notice.
Then again, I probably haven’t spent as much time looking as the rest of the town - and also, the only time I’ve seen him, he was standing behind a counter or at his front door.
“I don’t know.” Mom says, in a tone that makes me think this is a discussion they’ve had before. “You can get in all kinds of accidents out on a farm or something like that—would be far more common around here.”
“He’s definitely not from a farm, Mom.” Naomi laughs, then turns to me. “Ex-military is the running theory, but we’re not sure for certain. He hasn’t denied it…but he won’t say a damn thing to confirm it, either.”
I raise an eyebrow at that, even as the conversation around me continues the speculation.
Okay, that’s a little bit intriguing. Maybe. But that’s just your insatiable natural curiosity at work.
“It’s the way he is with that little girl, though, that’s what really matters. That’s how you know he’s a good-’un.” Mom says. “Who cares if he’s ex-military, or has been in some kind of accident, or comes from Mars for all we know—”
“I care!” Jenny laughs.
“It’s really none of our business.” I try to point out, but of course, it doesn’t stop them.
I always find it ironic that despite being a news reporter, I’m the least willing to participate in these kinds of discussions - but then maybe that’s because Anderson has a very strong code of ethics around privacy. It’s one of the things I respect about him the most, actually. Informing people of the important issues they should know about is one thing - invading someone’s private life is something else entirely.
“I’m just saying, Kelsey, you might want to think about it—”
“Especially since you’re the only one of us who can think about it now.” Elizabeth points out, with a laugh she shares with Jenny.